Pathetic. That's what I was. Why did I have to panic. Why did I have to run away from him when he was finally warming up to me. I was so pathetic.

My father was right, I was weak, I couldn't do anything right. I didn't deserve anyone to love me. I was meant to be alone.

I reached the house panting hard from how much I ran. I Cautiously opened the front door so that no one could hear me. Fortunately no one was in the living room. I ascended the stairs and came into a hallway that lead to my room.

I stopped in my tracks and turned to look at the walls that held a lot of photos. I swallowed hard and looked at them.

There were baby pictures, I moved closer and silently prayed to find at least one of mine but there were none.

My breath caught in my throat and tears started to roll down my face.

Angela could pretend all she wanted to love me but I knew better than that. Signs were there, she was always reluctant to be in the same room as me for crying out loud. It was clear as day light that she never wanted me.

Hell, she even left me all by myself when I was just a kid. I'd always tried to convince myself that she had a valid reason to leave me behind. But what? What could be the reason for a mother to stay away from his son for so long?

I traced the photos with my hands, more tears falling from my eyes. They all looked happy, like a normal loving family they were. Their smiles were genuine, their unconditional love for each other was captured perfectly and it just showed me how much they never needed me in their lives.

I tried to sob silently not to alarm anyone but I couldn't hold it in. There was a painful ache in my chest and I wanted it to go away.

"Skylar?" Angela walked into the hallway. "Baby what's wrong?"

I looked at her and cried even harder. I turned around and ran off to my room and locked the door behind me

"Sky what's wrong? Talk to me my son." She banged on the door panicky.

was she fucking kidding me. Who was she calling her son?

"Go away Angela." I sobbed." I'm not your fucking son."

"Please baby open the door so that we can talk."

" we have nothing to talk about."

"Baby please hear me out."

"Don't fucking call me that."

I heard muffled sobs coming from her but I didn't give a damn about it. She couldn't just act like she was the fucking victim.

"Sky-"

"Shit Angela just go away." I said through gritted teeth.

It was silent for about 15 seconds then Angela said," I'll be down stairs if you need anything." And she was gone.

I knew I acted like a total dick to her but she deserved it. She wasn't the victim, I was. I didn't even know why she sounded hurt.

I needed to calm down. I reached for my drawer and took out the only thing that helped me calm down in my time of distrace, my razer.

....

I

t was already passed midnight when I finally decided to leave my room. I needed bandages to wrap my new cuts but I was out so I decided to grab some from the kitchen's first aid kit.

I tip toed down the stairs and went to the kitchen. I took what I needed and turned to leave.

"Skylar?" Gerald appeared from behind the kitchen counter. " what are you doing up this late on a school night?"

"I nee_ I came to drink some water."

I hid my bloodied wrists in my shirt so that he couldn't see them.

Fuck they stung but I was already used to the pain.

He studied me for a second then said ,"You know you are not alone right?" He said looking at me. " we are your family and you should tell us if something's bothering you. Angie and I will always be here for you."

I looked at him and I could see sincerity in his eyes. But could he tell me the same thing tif he got to know about my fucked up life? I doubted.

" I know you have been through a lot because of your father's death but I'm here to talk if you feel like talking to anyone. I can't replace your father in your heart but I'll try my best to take care of you, I'll always be here to listen to you."

I nodded at him.

"This is your home as much as it is anyone else's, don't feel like you are alone, I'm here for you, everyone's here for you, I promise you this."

I wanted to believe him, I really did, but I didn't want to build my hopes up, I didn't want to get hurt more than I already was.

Nothing is this world is promised except death.

"Goodnight son, see you tomorrow." He said and walked upstairs to his room.

"Goodnight Gerald."

I headed up to my room and shut the door closed.

....

I don't know but I shedded tears when writing this chapter 😭 I really hate doing this to Skylar. I love my baby so much.

Don't forget to vote and. comment