"Doctor Smith!"

The sound of Judy's voice stirred Smith awake out of his sleep then he reached out yanking his cloak off the improvised coat hangar departing from the clean but otherwise simple room. It was easy to see with his newly adjusted vision having reverted to that of his more acceptable one. Was it the medicine? Was it his spider half deciding on what was to stay or what was to go? He wasn't quite sure about the matter regarding it. It was a perplexing question in all its forms.

"Are you awake?" Her voice echoed.

Smith rubbed his calves strolling toward the wall of a curtain resting ahead. He let go of a sigh that he hadn't quite been aware of holding looking on toward them. The curtains were made from material found in his exploration around the continent. Exactly the same kind of fabric that he fashioned into his cloak. His room was filled in trinkets from the time on the planet even the recent one left by the galactic space lawyers for the Robinsons's presence prior to the event happening. The professor launching a law suit? How and where he got his hand on documents to start one was baffling.

"I am awake, my dear,"

Smith poked his head out of the hut between the two curtains then looked down upon the woman who shorter than him then cast a smile down on to her, tiredly, carefully clenching on to the curtains.

"Now. . ."

Smith tilted his head.

"What is the matter?"

"We are leaving Takuchi Seven tomorrow afternoon," Judy said.

"Tomorrow afternoon?" Smith said. "My, has time flown by fast."

"Feeling any better?" Judy asked.

"I am in excellent condition," Smith replied.

"So it is working," Judy said.

"The marijuana pain killer pills have been doing wonderfully," Smith assured, tiredly, carefully patting on her shoulder. "Still lasting."

"Good to hear, Doctor Smith," Judy said. "I was getting worried about you. I have seen people wrecked by pain when I thought they were acting and . . ."

"You didn't like what you saw," Smith said.

"it was awful," Judy said. "My first time I saw someone in real pain was in improv and the director applauded them."

"Awful, I can believe," Smith said. "And Emmy award for expressing pain, believable." He snickered. "Their pain must have been worse than they could normally handle it."

"How do you handle pain?" Judy asked.

"Men and women share different testament to 'what makes me cry' meter," Smith said. "Mine is off the normal charts." He turned her around than proceeded to guide her away from his hut with her heels digging into the ground and the top of her shoes facing up. "I insist that you return to your home before it gets too dark out here." he gestured toward the environment around her. "It is quite dangerous being out here in the dark."

Judy turned around then faced him as his fingers slipped off her shoulders when her feet met the ground.

"What is out here?" Judy asked. "Something I haven't seen before?"

"A giant caterpillar with teeth and a lot of eyeballs," Smith replied, stepping back from her, almost huddled in a corner between two trees.

"That is not dangerous," Judy laughed with a shake of her head. "I rode one once with Don. Where is it?"

Smith's eyes were scanning the tree tops with wariness.

"Hibernating somewhere on this unique planet, hopefully, " Smith said. "Could have hiked up a amazonian tree and built a cocoon there."

"It is really good to see you, Doctor Smith," Judy began to smile at the older man.

"You are not really seeing how I really look like," Smith admitted then reminded her. "It is a illusion."

"You are here," Judy said.

"Yes," Smith said. "Yes, I am."

"That matters the most," Judy said. "Your presence matters. Your actions and words are you. What you look like is just a. . ."

"Icon," Smith supplied.

"Yes, like a icon," Judy said.

"So you are to say if I were a entity then you wouldn't mind me not having a body?" Smith tilted his head. "So it is not just your mother's opinion?"

"It is our opinion, Doctor Smith," Judy said.

Smith paused a moment thinking it over.

"It is already dark out," Smith said. "May I escort you back to the Jupiter 2?"

"You may," Judy said as the older man joined her side. "Say, Doctor Smith, have you met any good directors on Earth?"

"Hmmmm," Smith said. "There is a few I have known in the past and became acquainted to. Michael Bay not only has a thing for explosions in his movies but for it in war. . ."

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

It had been their first week being lost in space, away from everything they knew, everything that was known, and familiar for a unfamiliar world that featured faded constellations that lacked its once brilliant flare. The tall machine that had carried the saboteur of the mission all the way to the ship rested on the bridge keeping a eye on the traitor while attending to his first shift. Will got up from the chair then checked the console determining the time. It had been two hours since his father put him on watch. His first watch with someone who had been instrumental in his growth and desire to create a time portal.

He didn't trust the man with the course. Smith wasn't exactly a man, Will reasoned, well on way on becoming a monster. A monster being overseen by someone more suited for the task and prepared since the neural net wouldn't allow for a tedious and treasonous act to be performed a third time. He had seen him as a man before leaving the Jupiter 2 to find his father. But now, all he saw, was the strange tall creature with a face that was in shades of black with hints of gray as a secondary theme. And he wanted to stay far as he could from someone as dark as that. The older man was set on his side in the chair.

"Robot, keep a eye out," Will ordered.

"I shall," Robot replied.

"Good night," Will said.

"Will," Robot started, turning toward the child heading toward the entrance of the corridor. "you were ordered to be on shift."

"Was I?" Will turned toward Robot with a eyebrow raise. "Dad did point at you and Doctor Smith for tonight's shift. And he did say 'you two'."

Robot lowered his helm.

"That computes," Robot said.

Will smiled, then waved back at Robot.

"See you on the morning shift, Robot," Will said.

"Good night, Will." Robot's helm twirled then he rolled on by the older man's side and locked his helmet down keeping himself on alert.

Out of fright and alarm, Smith bolted forward, grasping on to the arm rests of the chair leaning forward with sweat coming down his skin. He leaned back into the chair but stopped once his back pressed against the back rest then leaned off closing his eyes and wrapped his arms around his torso lowering his head in pain with a wince even closing his eyes. Smith turned his attention upon the modified Rambler Crane series model beside him then leaned forward.

"Where is Will?"

"He left,"

Smith wore heartbreak then fought it back replacing it with confusion.

"Why?" Smith's voice was small.

"He claimed it was you and I that Professor Robinson meant to have shift," Robot said.

"And he just happened to realize that," Smith said.

"Yes," Robot said.

"Bullshit," Smith said.

"He wouldn't lie," Robot said.

Smith shot a glare up toward Robot.

"It's been a couple of decades since you were first activated and you haven't learned the smell of shit when you hear it," Smith said. "I should have programmed you in with the top of the line AI's capable of registering the less preferred sarcasm for mission purposes and perhaps dogged Mission Control for that mind wave reader being installed."

"That is a comment which does not make sense," Robot said. "Words do not smell."

"Your arms were always tree trunks," Smith retorted with a pointed glare.

"Ah ha ha," Robot laughed, mechanically. "Another of your silly comments. Now that, I do get."

"My dear old. . ." Smith stopped himself. They weren't exactly friends nor were they colleague. "That wasn't silly. It was a lie. A example. A truth bomb if you will." He waved his hand then dabbed at his face with a handkerchief wiping off the sweat from his forehead. "A white little lie from a child." He leaned away from the machine then folded his arms. "He is disgusted with me."

"No, he is not,"

"Yes, he is,"

"He is not,"

"Very wrong,"

"I have known Will far longer than you have,"

"This is a entirely different Will Robinson, you cylon lunatic!"

"You cannot read minds," Robot pointed out. "Your ESP rating indicates you are capable of observing."

"Psychology is my forte," Smith said. "So is neurology, surgery, mathematics, environmental psychology, family psychology-"

"Painting, sculpting, dancing, singing." Robot finished. "I am very familiar to your successful special interests."

"For someone who has known me for decades, you barely know the surface of revelations impacting psychology," Smith replied. "You saw how Penny was disgusted with me after the professor suggested we go out hiking?"

"Yes, I am-"

"You don't and you won't understand how that fucking feels until you have that really happen to you,"

"How does this make it any different?" Robot asked.

"Because these are just insults," Smith said. "You haven't been rejected by another machine like you."

"Maybe I have," Robot said. "Not like I. Not my model. Or my make. Different species-"

"The point is ninny, a group of beings you can blend in rejecting you," Smith said. "Did you blend in with them?"

Robot was silent then Smith turned his attention off looking on toward the view screen with slumped shoulders. He could only see through the lens of the modified window displaying the stars waiting ahead of the Jupiter 2. All of which could have suitable planets to rest on and relax while collecting supplies. The image flickered in his mind. Hauntingly. Of his counterpart providing terror to others like him. He rolled his hands into fists then put his forehead on his knuckles looking down with a deep breath being released.

"I did not," Robot said, finally. "I can compute the pain you are in. My computations tell me it is worse than how Will felt once he lost his family."

"It is worse than that," Smith said. "So much worse," he rubbed his eyes then leaned on his other side against the chair then made a admission. "I don't like the creature I am becoming." Smith shuddered. "He terrifies me."

It came out small and softly yet full of fear for the future. A future that Robot was keenly familiar to in watching the man fall apart before his sensors and his memory tapes day by day embracing himself but furious at his past self for making the mistake that left him in this mess in the first place. To Robot's sensors, there were hate radiating from the man. It wasn't hate directed at his past self, it was hate in the present, the future, and the past. It was all of him. Just himself in general.

It was a stone to begin hating the person who made the mistake. A stepping stone that could be stepped aside and go down a path that was better. More kindly to his mind and soul regarding the on-going change. Robot didn't know what to say. He did know what to say but Smith would not like them. Only words he could offer would do little to comfort Smith even a touch that would be outright rejected. Words that would do little to ease his fears. Robot's helm twirled at the predicament then turned away from Smith facing the front window.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////

Judy was the first to come into the ship and go to the lower deck from the doorway joined by West. The professor wasn't alone on the bridge with the company of the youngest members of the family by his side appearing to be anticipating something to happen. Whatever it was, under the disguise, Smith raised a non-existent brow that wasn't seen then shook his head. The small slice of the family only saw him appear baffled at their remained presence then he turned his attention upon the commander of the mission.

"Professor, I like to speak with you," Smith's eyes directed toward Penny and Will. "Alone."

"Penny, Will, tell your mother I will join shortly for dinner," John ordered.

"Sure, dad," Will said.

"Doctor Smith, are you coming with us?" Penny said.

"I rather err on caution, my dear," Smith said. "I am not ready."

"When you're ready to sit at the table, we'll have a seat for you." Penny said.

"So kind of you to say that. . ." Smith said.

Penny and Will fled out of the bridge side by side leaving the men in the bridge, quietly. The door beside John came to a close and Smith walked away from the Professor coming toward the chair of the craft. His concern and worry became more evident to his demeanor than how he had presented himself to be carefree and worry free, even happy about their departure, he had a moment of silence to himself. He couldn't bring himself to speak so the professor started.

"What is the matter, Smith?" John asked. "Find something you shouldn't?"

"It is about the trip," Smith turned away from the front chair.

"We can make it if you lower your field when you do look human and it will be better off for you that way," John said. "And for my family."

"It is not about that part," Smith said. "I like it to be about it but I have no quells against plan."

"Well?"

"There is a certain risk I won't allow for allies," Smith said. "It is just too risky."

"What is that?" John asked.

"I like to be in stasis during the flight, Professor," Smith said. "Just for the trip till you get to the next planet. Not until you find the people who promised me."

"What is wrong?" John asked.

"If my change were to happen during flight and become worse because of the medicine then my mind went into pure madness there would be little place to hide in this ship or outside for that matter." Smith explained. "Little chance of survival for your family or anyone else I may cross paths with . . . should you airlock me out."

"They can survive in space?" John asked, in shock.

"Tragically," Smith said.

"Without a breathing apparatus. . ." John said. "That is amazing."

"Amazing, brilliant, yet adaptable,"

"You admire the creature for its survival addendum?"

"In awe at a distance, I would," Smith said. "Monstrosity! Disaster. Horrifying." He shook his head. "Don't ask me how they are capable of that biologically," Smith shrugged. "They just do."

"What else can they do?" John asked.

"They are capable of peeling open doors by sheer will not just eating people alive," Smith's figure was shaking. "I don't want your home to become another Proteus."

"I see. . ." John said. "We have ample reason to be terrified of what you are becoming. Just as they did."

"Just as I am," Smith said. "I am very afraid of it."

"We have no reason to be terrified of what you are becoming," John reiterated. "Right now, you are being exceptionally strong against the changes that may be going on in that head of yours and you are resistant about going against your own values."

"How long can that last, Professor?" Smith asked. "How long can that last?"

"Long enough," John said.

"No," Smith shook his head. "It can't."

"What makes you say that?" John asked, incredulously.

Smith sighed lowering his head walking around the astronavigator then came to a stop from the other end.

"I stand a very good chance at having a nervous breakdown and never recovering from this infliction should that medicine make my transformation go faster," Smith said. "If it comes down to it," Smith held his hand up stopping the professor from continuing. "You can't find a nearby planet to throw me aside . . Get him aboard the ship and trick him into the airlock. You will need to spice things up so he wouldn't be aware who is doing it. I need you to throw him into the sun."

Those were words that distanced Smith from the man that he was speaking of. Someone who wouldn't wear the name 'Smith' proudly despite the mistakes, the change in his being, and the pain that his body was being forced into. It was as if he was speaking about a entirely different person. Not the same creature in his colony ship. Not the person that John was speaking to. That much the professor understood regarding the issue. Yet, hearing Smith making the proposition of eliminating his hollowed persona through heartbreaking means that made him pause and have to process.

"Have the ninny do it . . ." Smith added. "He can be retrieved safely with a harpoon."

"What if we put you into stasis?" John offered.

"It would only be a delay," Smith shook his head. "A very long delay in which we all know what that means."

"It won't be forever," John said.

"Professor, you underestimate yourself, you are stubborn. Gifted with determination and optimism that your counterpart doesn't have," Smith said. "It would be forever when the family would agree to your decision on the matter."

"It will just be awhile then,"

"No," Smith declined. "I don't want to awaken because of a insect and find everything around me has decomposed from thousands of years!"

He threw his hands in the air then rubbed his eyes.

"I don't want to awake, alone, on a world full of life and unable to spare others of my fate."

Smith closed his eyes turning away from the professor facing the air lock with one hand balancing him against the rims of the astronavigator then rubbed his forehead with his other free hand.

"I wouldn't forgive myself if I gave someone the key to a unending hell and let them in. Let alone your children."

Smith's voice softened.

"Taking them away from you and requiring their presence in a freezing tube!"

Smith scoffed at the comment.

"A child outliving their parents? Baa!" He turned away from the airlock then smacked on the edge of the astrogator unexpectedly. "Not on my watch!" he lightly tapped on the counter cooling himself down and became calm. "Now, if it had been the awful version of the major being the person that I harmed and I were still back there;" Smith looked off aside. "I would have minded." then he shrugged with little reasoning behind his next comment. "I don't mind now."

Smith lowered his hand.

"I need you to promise me that should it matter, Professor." Smith finished.

It was a moment before the commanding officer replied.

"I will discuss it with Maureen and Don," John said. "I will make the promise in the morning after that discussion."

"Please," his voice cracked in his desperate plea turning toward the professor. "Be very thorough."

"We will be," John said. "We will be."

Smith let out a hollow but vulnerable rare smile back at the professor.

"Thank you." Smith walked away from the professor then went toward the doorway of the ship but paused and turned toward John. "I shall remain outside until tomorrow afternoon."

"We are leaving at one forty-five," John said.

Smith smiled back in return that from underneath the illusion that was overshadowed by his illusion feature of his usual disapproval.

"See you, then, professor." Then Smith returned into the night leaving the Jupiter behind in the desert scenery returning to his hide out.