The two of you stood with barely an inch of space between your heaving chest and his. Your anger and emotions had gotten the better of you. Normally you'd be annoyed by losing control but for the first time in too long you were able to feel something, something past fear and pain and anger. You finally felt the love you had held for him, the burning passion and affection, the hope he gave you, the joy and peace you felt by his side; the fog of everything still held strong but finally a crack of light began to peer through.

Silence lingered. Not cold abrasive silence tearing at you to break it but a warm mist around you, comforting you from all the noises that weren't needed for you to finally grasp this ounce of hope.

Azriel broke the silence.

"You can't love me."

"What?" You croaked.

You didn't expect him to profess his love to you in return, you didn't expect anything grand or positive, but you didn't expect him to deny how you felt.

"If you were to love someone, it wouldn't be me. It couldn't be me."

"Why wouldn't it be you?"

Words escaped him. He couldn't voice every insecurity that held onto him and drove him insane every day, his self-worth lowered into the ground before he was able to truly build it. He took a glance at his scarred hands. You knew it wasn't the scars themselves that destroyed him, but who caused them, why they caused them.

"You made me feel welcome into a group of strangers when you had no reason to, you always made me feel welcome and safe. Even recently, with you following me and watching, I... I hated that you could think I would go against you and everyone else but for the first time since I got back, I felt safe, knowing you were always close by to make sure nothing would happen," you said, pain cracking your voice. "I know Rhys has told you of some of the things that happened under the mountain but it was worse than any words can form and the only thing that kept me sane was that you and Cassian and Mor and Amren were safe, but mainly you. I knew you were all stronger than me, mentally and physically and would have handled it better than me but I never want anyone, especially you to have to face any of that. I don't want you to ever feel pain again, ever feel like you're not good enough, that you aren't a hero and a fighter and someone on the path to greatness. I just want you to be happy and I selfishly would hope that would be with me."

Silence greeted you both again. So much of him told him not to believe what you said, to only believe he was useless and unwanted as he had been raised but a small spark of trust took hold, assuring him of your intentions and beliefs.

He shook away his thoughts, focusing on you. A small twitch curled to the corner of his lips, as one of his hands moved to cup your cheek. Azriel expected you to flinch away from the touch of his calloused and scarred fingers, but you leant into the gentle touch, taking in every inkling of sensation that the contact offered. Without taking his eyes off of yours, he leaned in and pressed his lips to yours, accepting your love and accepting everything that comes with it.

~*~

Written by Charlotte.

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