In the days that followed, Seren was gradually feeling more and more like herself. She didn't do any training, but she kept herself busy with other things. She painted with Feyre. She went shopping with Mor. She worked in the garden with Elain. Amren and Nesta had read silently in the library while she did sketches nearby.

    Lucien had arrived several days ago. He spent most of his time following Elain around and doing everything he could to make sure she was all right. Seren was glad to see her friend interacting with her mate so well. Their relationship had improved greatly.

    And so had her own. At first, Azriel barely left her alone long enough to use the bathroom. He was loosening up on his vigilance now that she was feeling better. His presence didn't feel overbearing, though. Just a steady assurance that he was there, should she need him. They shared a bed every night after that first time. Some nights, they slept in her room. On others, they slept in his.

    Every day, she felt their Bond strengthening. It was a prominent feeling now, as it had been for a while. Seren could feel Azriel, even when he wasn't touching her. She could sense his feelings and occasionally, hear his thoughts without using her daemati powers. She knew what that meant, but she couldn't voice it. Not yet. Still, she wondered if Azriel knew the truth of their Bond too.

•༻☾☽༺•

    Seren entered the sitting room and found Mor, Elain, Feyre, and Lucien already there. Feyre held Nyx. He cooed and waved his hands around. His brilliant blue eyes roamed over the people that surrounded him.

    Azriel sat down on a chair near Mor. Seren joined him. He shifted his wings over the back of the seat and she slid into his lap. Seren kicked her feet over the arms of the chair. Azriel rested a hand against her waist with a smile. She'd begun doing this more often. Azriel seemed to like it.

    "Rhys said the females have been coming to training more often and more show up every day," Feyre said. She tickled Nyx's chin and he giggled. "Your friend has been giving out a lot of encouragement. Cassian even has her teaching some lessons."

    "Good. I'm glad Jorah is still training," Seren replied. "And actually, I think I should go see her."

    "I can bring her here..." Azriel began.

    Seren shook her head and interrupted him. "No, I want to see her in Ironcrest." He tensed immediately.

    "Are you sure?" Mor leaned over and rested a hand on her arm. "You know what going back there entails."

    "I know. I've been thinking about it." Seren swallowed and met Azriel's gaze. "I need to go back, just for a little while. I need to see Jorah...and I need to see Erebus."

    "No," Azriel replied. "I'm not letting him anywhere near you."

    "I'm not asking. I won't see him alone, but I still have to. I have to see him again while I'm in control. To remind myself that he didn't succeed and that he's not some monster. He's just a male who tried to hurt me." Mor tightened her grip on Seren's arm. Elain huddled closer to Lucien and he wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "I don't want to be haunted by this for the rest of my life. If I don't face him, I know I will be."

    "Some hauntings don't end," Feyre murmured.

    Seren glanced at her. "This one will. I'll make sure of it."

    "All right. If that's what you want," Azriel sighed. "I'll tell Rhys."

    "I'm not coming," Elain said. "I'm sorry. I don't think I can."

    "It's all right," Seren replied. "You do what you feel is best for you."

    Elain nodded shortly and left. Lucien trailed after her. Mor pushed herself out of her seat with a sigh. "When Rhys and Cassian get back, we're all going to Rita's every night for a week."

    Feyre stood as well. "I'm proud of you." She smiled at Seren and balanced Nyx on her hip. She swept out of the room behind Mor.

    "Are you sure about this?" Azriel asked.

    Seren looked back at him, feeding resolution into her gaze. "Yes. I have to do this. It's been long enough. I want to face him and remind myself of who he is."

    "You know who he is."

    "Yes, but in my mind, I no longer see an Illyrian war lord. I see a monster who is undefeatable." She exhaled sharply and Azriel began to rub her arms soothingly. "I need to remind myself of who he really is," she repeated.

    "This won't make the trauma leave. I'm not trying to talk you out of it...I just want you to know."

    "I know." Seren leaned her forehead against his. "But it will help. I know there are things you want, and I want to be able to give you that."

    Azriel drew back, shaking his head. "No, don't do this for me. I want you to do what you want, not what you think I want."

    "I think what we want is the same. I don't want to be with you and panic because my mind thinks it's him. I know that might still happen, but I'll do what I can to make sure it's not often."

    "Seren," he lifted a hand to her cheek. "I won't ask anything of you until I know you feel ready to give. Even then, you can tell me no. I love you for more than just your body."

    "I know," she said once more. "I don't know when I'll be ready. I just know that facing Erebus will bring me one step closer."

    "Are you certain?"

    "Yes." She wrapped her arms around his neck and brought her lips to his. Azriel didn't let go of her when she pulled away. He buried his face in her neck, holding her tightly.

•༻☾☽༺•

    Seren woke in her room the next morning. Azriel lay beside her, his eyes still closed. He had begun sleeping better now that they slept together. She smiled and trailed her fingers down his arm. Shadows chased after her fingers.

    Azriel blinked his eyes open and sat up. "Are you ready for today?"

    She nodded. "I am." Truthfully, she was terrified, but she was ready. She had to do this. She wanted to. Seren slipped out of bed and grabbed her Illyrian leathers.

    She put on the thin underclothes first. She gulped as she pulled on the leggings. The last time she'd worn them...Azriel's hand was on her back. "I'm here," he murmured. "I'm here." Shadows wound down his arm and curled around her shoulders.

    "Put your hand on my neck," Seren instructed. "So I can feel your scars." He obliged and she tugged her leathers on over the underclothes.

    "Are you all right?"

    Seren sheathed Metanoia at her thigh. She drew in a measured breath and nodded. "Yes."

    Azriel drew his hand back and she turned around. His hazel eyes drifted over her. He looked away suddenly, running a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry."

    "No, it's all right. Look at me if you want to." Azriel hesitated, then looked back at her. She didn't balk at the emotion that flooded his gaze. The love, the pride, the desire. Seren reached out to him. Azriel hugged her tightly and she pressed her face against his bare chest. "You were the first person to show pride towards me after my mother died," she murmured. "Elain was the first to show me true friendship. Rhys and Feyre were the first to show me kindness. Everyone showed me some form of love, but your love I treasure most of all."

    "For the first time in my life, I feel worthy of giving someone love and receiving it in return," Azriel replied. "I have never felt worthy of my family. I didn't feel worthy of Mor. I didn't feel worthy of Elain. I didn't feel worthy of Gwyn. I didn't feel worthy of you either, at first."

    "What changed?"

    "You reached out to me in a way others never had. You looked past the flaws I saw in myself, flaws you never saw. You helped me and now I don't see them so much either. When I touch you," his thumb brushed over her neck, "I don't feel like I'm tainting you. I feel like you're cleansing me." Azriel's voice caught and he paused before continuing. "I fell in love with you because of that. I started to fall in love with you when you took my hand and wouldn't let me pull away. I knew I loved you when we were in the hut and you loved the feel of my hands."

    Seren looked up at him and found his eyes rimmed with silver. "And I began falling in love with you when you held me after I destroyed the clearing. You have always understood me. You have always known what I needed. You have always seen me, not as an object, but as a person. When I burned, you weren't afraid of me. I don't know when I knew I loved you. I just knew that I did and for once in my life, everything felt right." Azriel closed his eyes and a tear dripped down his cheek. Seren kissed it away.

    The truth sat on the tip of her tongue, as it had for so long. Seren cupped Azriel's face in her hands. His eyes met hers and he waited. She leaned up and kissed him softly.

    "Everything felt right..." she blinked back the stinging in her eyes, "because I had found my mate. You are my mate, Azriel." The Mating Bond snapped into place, brilliant and shining. She could feel it, now complete within her chest. All the jealousy and protectiveness she'd felt...it was because he was her mate. The thoughts she'd heard and the emotions she'd felt, the ones that didn't belong to her...she'd felt them over the incomplete Bond. The love, the safety, the comfort...he was her mate. He was her mate and she was his.

    "I've wanted to tell you since I realized it," Azriel whispered. "But I couldn't let myself. I wanted you to accept it on your own. I didn't want you to feel like a possession to me." He framed her face with his hands too and pressed their foreheads together. "You are my mate. You are the most precious gift I have ever been given."

    Seren made a sound, halfway between a laugh and a sob. Azriel slid a hand to the back of her neck. He pressed his lips to hers and called down the Mating Bond as he did so. She answered his call and her heart leaped for joy, feeling that shining beacon. Flames burst from her skin. Azriel's shadows joined them. Flames and shadows swirled around them, dancing in harmony.

    At last, she reined in her flames. The shadows returned to Azriel. Seren squared her shoulders and began braiding her hair. "I'm ready to face Erebus." She was ready and she felt no fear. Her mate would be at her side. She would do this for both of them.