It is it doubt that you find the root of failure. The nagging emotion tickles the back of your mind daring you to believe it until it nearly drives you mad. I do believe perhaps the worst part of my own doubt was that I had no idea whether to believe it or not. It seemed as though my fragile sanity rocked back and forth from certainty to utter confusion at the drop of a hat.

Just when I was sure of what I was the impudent lightning had given me reason to doubt everything. Either I had angered Death, despite doing exactly what he had instructed me to do, or everyone was correct and I was a stark raving lunatic of my own creation who had simply been a victim of circumstance.

I strongly disliked both possibilities.

The first thing I was aware of was a dull burnt sensation. It ached deeply as I lay there slowly becoming aware of other sensations; a hard cold floor pressed against my cheek, the stuffy warm air and the soft breaths of another creature. The lattermost was what convinced me I should get up.

I forced my eyes open as I slowly looked around, a mind numbing fatigue overcoming me. I was in a elaborately decorated bedroom furnished with beautiful oakan and gold furniture. A large vanity painted with painful intricacy sat before me holding a smooth mirror in which my mangled reflection sat blinking at me with an indifferent expression splayed across it's face. My human instinct couldn't help but notice how positively dreadful I looked, my clothing maimed and my exposed arms suddenly scarred with a bizarre leaf-like pattern that swirled up one side of my neck and then onto my cheekbone before stopping abruptly.

Could it have been scarring from the lightning or perhaps some far more divine marking? Either way I found myself irritated that it wasn't symmetrical. If this was Death's doing I was going to have to have a long talk with him on the subject.

My eyes shifted as a movement behind me caught my eye behind me in the mirror. The rich blankets in the grand canopied bed behind me shifted slightly as a head of messy blonde hair appeared, the blue eyes that were just partially visible beneath the curls were drowsy and unaware- that is until they set themselves upon me.

The boy, I believe he was called Aster, was suddenly scrambling from his bed his limbs moving in a terrified flurry of desperation as he attempted to untangle his legs from the blanket. He fell against the door and began pounding on it desperately trying to force the clearly locked door open.

I rose to my feet stems of pain racing through my body, much to my irritation. My movements were far too slow for my liking and far too labored. I attempted not to sway as I made an act of pulling my swords free, stalling for time as I tried to work up the willpower to force myself to walk over there and slay the boy, whether for Death or the gamemakers I really wasn't quite sure. Suddenly without warning Aster stopped pounding his fists irrationally against the door and skipped backward a few steps in shock, my gaze directed itself towards the direction of what his eyes had fallen upon.

"Show me your strength." The loopy words had appeared in gold against the dark wood, etching themselves deep into the wood so that they could not be smeared. Aster's eyes locked on me widening with a horrified realization.

"I'm rather not in the mood for killing, but I suppose it is inevitable." I commented allowing Aster a second to hastily grapple at the scythe that was strapped to his hip. I found myself mildly disappointed when the only reply I received was a his sharp intakes of air, I suppose not everyone could be as witty as myself though..

I so kindly allowed him to make the first move, he charged me and sent his scythe barreling towards my neck, I blocked it and sent my other sword into the side of his stomach. I felt my sharp blade cut into his flesh as he stumbled backward eyeing me in fear. And then instead of plunging back into the fight he ran.

I chased him. My legs almost instantly beginning to scream in agony, my lungs burned like fire and my breaths came in short gasps, but I ignored it. An unshakable determination implanting itself in my head. Aster leapt over the huge bed in a bound, tearing the curtains in his wake so that they fell around me. Rashly, I ripped them free and Aster threw a vase at my head. I ducked nearly toppling to one side. This was hardly an actual fight.

I grabbed a small wooden stool from beside a desk and threw it as Aster. It hit him squarely in the head and he toppled to the hard stone floor, almost instantly he was back on his feet but that small delay was all I needed to catch him. I lifted my sword about to cut off his sprint by him into a corner when the least expected happened; Aster dropped his scythe. "I have to die. I'm scared, but I have to die." He choked his blue eyes suddenly glistening with water. "I'm not going to die a coward and it might as well be now. Just don't make it painful." He ordered lifting his head slightly in an attempt to look strong despite the fact he was quite obviously breaking inside.

I stared at him warily, not sure that this was not some form of a clever ruse and yet simultaneously my interest was peaked. "Your behavior is a out of character from what I've observed...."

He shook his head weakly. "I made a mistake." He shook his head looking down at the floor in shame. "I wished that everyone in my district who would have volunteered for me and didn't would be put to death. I- I can't win. The closer and the closer I get to winning the more tempting it becomes to just be selfish." He sigh looking up at me with a sad but fierce look in his eye. "Selfish is the only thing I have ever been my entire life. Thats going to stop right now." His voice cracked. "So please, just get this over with."

I knew how he felt, I remembered the pending futility that had overwhelmed me as I looked upon the oncoming storm clouds yesterday. I wished he didn't feel that way. "Relax, Aster, Death will be kind to you." I whispered locking eyes with the boy for one long second before I plunged my sword right through his heart, piercing it.

I watched the boy collapse to the ground, blood blossoming on his chest as he stared upwards in terror. I sat beside him and took his soft hand in mine in his final seconds as his soul departed from his body. I wondered what he would have done if he'd known my wish for a mass exodus of souls that would tear thousands from Life's grasp.

The recurring nagging of my own doubt and utter confusion struck me, I wondered if I was right and suddenly I found myself wondering if my entire nation's lives were worth the risk of me being wrong.