Chapter 136

Thomas gets up the next morning with a stunning headache. He sees himself in the same clothes and reeking of booze. He sees Alana is already up for work. He just wonders if he is going to hear it for last night? He gets up going to the bathroom to clean up, needing to get ready for work himself. He takes a few Advil before getting into the shower.

He just lets the hot water run down his face, and down his body. His head so filled with thoughts, it was driving him crazy. He hopes that Alana doesn't make a big deal out of last night, as he knows he ran off and didn't tell her where he went. He needed a way for a bit, time to just sit there and let go the way he needed. The stress was killing him.

When he gets done his shower he gets dressed going downstairs, seeing Alana in the kitchen, getting ready to leave.

"The coffee is on, in case you want a cup before work. You look like you can use some."Alana says.

"Thank you, I can." Thomas answers.

"I am heading to work, I will see you later," Alana says, not mentioning last night at all.

"K," Thomas answers.

Thomas isn't sure why she didn't bring it up? In the past, it would have been a big thing, but at the moment she just let it rid. Then after everything, she has done, what did she want to say? Thomas thinks.

Thomas heads to work, not able to really think or work, his mind still filled with tons and tons of thoughts. His father's words just repeating in his mind over and over again. The thought of Luke's child being born into his home. Could he really do this?

If he didn't his life as he knew it would be over. Everything he has worked for would be also. The life they had now was nice and comfortable. They finally had a real marriage, one he wanted. Somehow and someway he had to get over this.

He goes on with the rest of his day, still half in a clouded gaze. When its time to go home, he doesn't. He goes to the local bar that's on the corner of where he works. Just wanting to get away for a bit, to forget everything. Mainly everything his father keeps telling him over and over again.

He sits there for hours, drinking one drink after another.

Alana goes home from work seeing that Thomas isn't home, she goes to text him.

"Is everything ok? I am home getting dinner ready. Where are you?" Alana says.

She doesn't get a response, she knows something is going on as Thomas was a lot of things but this wasn't the norm. He would answer back and never stay away, only when he had to go away for work.

She just goes on with the night, not letting on to anything, so Tommy wouldn't notice. After dinner, Tommy goes to her room, and Alana cleans up, waiting to see if Thomas comes home, which he doesn't.

She keeps checking her phone seeing nothing.

"Thomas, what is going on? This is the second night of this shit. Can you please at least tell me you are ok?" Alana says.

Still nothing. Alana locks up and goes upstairs to get ready for bed, just wondering if he is ok? There isn't anyone she can call to even check. Everything was fine until they went to see Sr. What did he say? What did he put in Thomas's head to make Thomas want to stay away? Was she missing something?

So many things were now running through her mind, she just sits in bed and waits for Thomas to come home.

It's going on twelve midnight, and finally, Thomas stumbles in yet again. Stumbling all the way upstairs into their room, where he starts taking off his clothes in the dark, making a ton of noise even though he is trying to be quiet.

Alana hears him, but doesn't know wheater or not to approach, he is drunk, but she is also at the same time tired of this shit.

"She puts the light on, just staring at him, trying to take off his pants.

"Where the hell have you been?" Alana says.

"Out," Thomas replies, sitting on the side of the bed.

"Where is out? I texted you twice and no answer, you could have been dead somewhere. The least you could have done was say, I am out, and I am ok." Alana states.

"Since when do you care?" Thomas replies.

"Where did that come from?" Alana answers.

Thomas is intoxicated, and not thinking with his right mind, everything that was building up was there ready to hit.

"You never gave a fuck where I was last year, you didn't even care If I was here or not when you had him," Thomas reveals.

Alana doesn't know what to answer.

"I thought we were over this," Alana says.

"OVer? Was he that good in bed you cried yourself to sleep? You were a zombie for weeks after he dumped you. Was he that fucking wonderful? I don't think he was, he didn't stand by you, I am the one here, putting up with all the shit, picking up all the pieces he left behind.

'Your drunk." Alana says.

"Yea, So? It doesn't change the fact of any of it. Was he worth all of this? He is back with his wife, having a marriage, he isn't thinking about you!" Thomas snaps.

That hurts Alana, she tries to hold back the tears.

"You really thought he was going to leave her for you didn't you? You would have left me in a blink of an eye for that loser. And now guess who you are stuck with? ME. Do I fill in the gaps now? Am I everything you want? And Need? I sure am better than that asshole!" Thomas growls.

Alana holds back on a lot of what she wants to say and even feels, knowing it would hurt him.

"I loved that Asshole, he accepted me for who I am, for what I am. He never judged me or made me feel bad that I wanted sex or anything else." Alana says as she grabs her pillow and stands up to leave the room.

"Yea run away like you always do, just this time you can't go to him!" Thomas shouts.

"Maybe I can't but at the moment, I don't want to be around you. I know what I did wasn't right, but you wanting to hurt me because of it, is no better. If you can't get over it, there is no sense in me staying here. I don't need him to leave you, Thomas, I can walk out that door, at any time, and it won't be because of him, It will be because OF you!" Alana barks walking out the bedroom door.