Bouquet of Lilies

Prologue

There is a clash that occurs when immovable objects meet unstoppable forces, when a mule meets a load; when two people, so strikingly similar in their dissimilarities meet, perchance, by fate, by inopportune slips of time and destiny; and simply – clash.

Sometimes it is the differences that attract the most, like edges of puzzle pieces formed to slide together, to fill each other in, to complete each other, to fill in each other’s voids, threatening to either fit perfectly or just be out of grasp – sometimes the thrill lies in the threat.

There can be no reasons at all, can be choice without justification and decision without thought – because emotion is the enemy of all rational thinking, because too often does searching for something cause for it to elude the seeker forever – things are most often found when no one is searching anymore; in a sense, all searching is done unconsciously.

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Chapter 1

1940. America. The big south.

Over 10 years into the Great Depression, and still the fighting spirit of the people had not yet died, had not yet been touched by war – that would take another year.

But for now, America, though sunken and in recess, still had life and opportunity.

Yuri’s life, until she was 8, had been well-off, to say the least. That was, until a fateful day in 1929, in October 1929, on a Thursday, and then a Tuesday; that stripped away millions of Americans all that they had; that triggered a global crash, sending almost everyone and everything into a state of delirium. She was not so well-off anymore, but luckily she was only a child at the time, so that the memories would sting less and innocent acceptance would come more easily. 

It had not come so easily to her parents; her father, who had toiled for years and years to amass his fortune; her mother, who had abandoned her fortune for love.

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The sun cracked over the hills – it was sunrise, time for Yuri to awake. Her eyes flashed open and shut, open and shut several times, until she heaved herself off the bed with a quiet groan. She sat on the edge of the bed, legs dangling, and rubbed her eyes, yawning in the process. She ruffled back her hair and closed her eyes for several moments to prepare herself for the day ahead.

The house was already empty when Yuri left, father and mother already off at work. Yuri slung her bag over her shoulder and headed to the dusty path next to her house, to the dairy where she worked as a delivery girl. 

The road was about 2 miles long, and the summer sun, even in the morning, made it a tiring trek. It was a trek made every day, for several years now, so that she could do all she could to help, so there would be food on the table and clothes on their backs. Work was a necessity.

She was about halfway into the walk now, had reached the point where she would think about her life. Her family was sweet – she wasn’t sure if there was any other word for it – they managed to hide the hurt that depression had worn upon them, managed to cover all thoughts of despair with a thin veil of happiness. Her life was happy – kind of, she had everything she needed and a loving family, though she did miss rolling in excess and having all of her heart’s desires – she had grown used to not wanting anything, to accepting things as they were and trying to never be selfish.

These thoughts carried her to the dairy where she worked, and the sun was beginning to ascend more and more into the sky as she set off with her first load, trotting into the town.

She completed her rounds and headed back to the dairy to rest, to meet with her friends before going off to lunch. Yuri plopped down on a chair and shrunk her shoulders, a little tired. Her friend Junho was sitting in a chair beside her, also tired. He turned to Yuri. He spoke with excitement in his voice.

“Yuri? Yuri?”

Yuri was too tired to respond, still had her eyes closed.

“Yuri! C’mon! I know you’re awake, you just sat down!”

“Yes, Junho?” 

Yuri spoke in a soft voice, eyes still closed.

“Did you hear about the carnival that’s going on tonight?” Junho asked.

“Yeah. We’ve had this conversation every day for the past –

“Are you going?”

“For the 20th time, yes, I am.” Yuri responded.

“Who are you going with?”

“You. We agreed on this already –

“Okay, good, because the talk around town is that –

“There’s going to be loads of pretty people there, I know.” Yuri said.

“Well, you didn’t have to interrupt! Jeez!”

Junho huffed and sulked in his chair while Yuri laughed to herself. 

It was noontime when Yuri left to go home, crossing the long path back, looking forward to the night time.

Just another day at work.

--------------

Jessica awoke that morning, or afternoon, it should be said; in a comfy bed; in a large, handsome room; in her parent’s summer home. In about another half hour, she rolled herself out of the bed and made her way to the restroom. 

It was several rooms down, was one of many restrooms in the manor where her family retreated to every summer. The halls were ornate; intricately designed with classic wallpapers and marble floors; pure columns to hold up the foundations; antique furniture to lounge upon but probably not actually very comfortable. The family was like that, design over utility.

Jessica was usually very reserved, but still outspoken when she needed to be. The only problem was – she rarely felt the need to say much, usually responded with either a small smile or no expression at all.

She was sitting at breakfast table, parents on the other side, reading their newspapers, while the servant brought her plate.

“How do you like it so far, Jessica?” her father asked, “It’s beautiful here, isn’t it?”

A small smile and nod of the head.

“I would say it’s quite lovely,” her mother said, “any new friends?”

Another smile, another nod of the head.

Her parents were waiting for her to say something. They were one of the few people she would speak for.

“I’m going to the carnival tonight, with some girlfriends I made in town the other day, is that alright?”

She always spoke while looking into someone’s eyes, but she spoke with her own eyes careful–always spoke with her eyes careful; because she wanted to be watching while pretending not to watch; because she wanted to pretend to be detached when she actually cared, very, very much.

“Of course,” her parents said in unison, smiling.

She returned the smile, loved the smile.

It was a great summer to be alive. 

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Jessica was walking up and down the streets of the small town now, shopping and just looking around, by herself; because she thought that every person needed some alone time, could not understand how some people went their entire lives without a few moments to themselves. The summer sun was hot, but that was only a part of the season, a part to be enjoyed, Jessica thought to herself. She was mulling her plans for the carnival over in her head, mulling over everything as she went through her day and the sun was beginning to sink in the sky. 

She headed home, to where her friends were already waiting, parked out front in the courtyard. She said a farewell to her parents, who were sitting on the porch, before she left.

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Yuri walking aimlessly around the carnival, was done eating and playing games, only listening to Junho ramble about the summer and the girls and what he wanted to do with his life.

“And oh boy, when he said that to me, I was about to smash his head in, but there were some ladies there, and you know, I couldn’t –

“Junho, he’s about one foot taller than you and looks like he could eat you for breakfast. Just let it go.”

Yuri found Junho cute; when he pretended to be bigger than he really was, when he let his imagination take over and just began to rant endlessly about everything and anything.

They were sitting on a bench near the Ferris wheel, just looking up at the sky. Yuri had always been there for Junho, from the time she had moved there till now, and Junho had always needed Yuri’s help to get him out of trouble or to lift him up when he was down. 

Yuri was shy, had always been shy and did not open up easily, even in matters that concerned her desperately. She rarely felt the need to be desperate, usually just let things go.

And so there Junho and Yuri sat, just talking about their lives, until they had run out of things to say and the silence was beginning to set in.

“Wanna ride the Ferris wheel?” asked Junho.

“Sure.” smiled Yuri.

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Jessica was lost. She had wandered away from her group of friends, couldn’t remember how that happened, and was now walking aimlessly. She had stopped looking for them, no longer searching.

She sighed as she looked around, not knowing what to do next.

Well, this is boring.

Shut up, Jessica, this is your own fault for dozing off.

She sighed again and looked around; saw a Ferris wheel a bit in front of 

her.

Whatever, might as well enjoy myself if I’m here.

She walked towards the Ferris wheel, not looking for anything in 

particular.

------------

Yuri and Junho were standing in line now, with Junho complaining, as usual, and Yuri listening, as usual.

“Aww, dammit! We’re at the back of the line, this sucks. Let’s leave, Yul!”

“Jun, we just got here, be patient. Look, the line’s moving, and the lines are the same everywhere.”

“No, they’re not, Yul, look over –

Junho was in the process of turning around and was about to point at a ride when he stopped talking and whipped his body back to the front, next to Yuri.

“What?” said Yuri, and was about to spin around as Junho grabbed her and yelled in a hoarse whisper, “Don’t turn around, stupid!”

“Wait, why?” said Yuri, shrugging Junho’s arm off of her.

“Because, there’s this really pretty girl behind us. Oh my God, I told you, Yul! We should have gone on the Ferris wheel. I really hope she’s in our compartment. I wonder if there are more of them just floating around –

Yuri was rolling her eyes while a pretty girl with blonde hair behind wondered what was wrong with the two maniacs in front of her.

-------------

Jessica was standing in line when the man in front of her turned around, hand raised at some object in the distance, nearly hitting her in the face, and then making eye contact with her and swiveling back around.

Idiot. Be careful.

Then, the tall girl next to him, (with long, beautiful hair), also tried turning around, when the man grabbed her and spun her back towards the front. Their heads were together, still talking, when the line moved forward. They were whispering at the floor.

Jessica coughed loudly.

“AHEM.”

--------------

Yuri and Junho jumped up and moved forward, not daring to look back. Junho began ranting again.

“Oh my God, Yul, she’s one of those ones, one of the demanding ones that control you. God help us! God help us!”

His eyes became frantic.

“Junho, be quiet. She just wanted us to move up in line. Stop being a baby.”

That’s what Junho was to her, a baby brother. Adorable, yes, caring, yes, immature, yes, sometimes annoying, yes; but, at the end of the day, she loved him anyway, and he loved her like an older sister, always looked to her for guidance.

Yuri turned to her side now, was curious about the girl behind them. She faced Junho, so that she could sneak a glance to her right, just out of curiosity, at the blonde girl.

“What are you doing?!?” Junho whispered loudly, when Yuri turned a bit to the side.

“Shhhh, Jun, don’t worry about me.”

“Oh my God, Yuri! Oh my God!” he was practically screaming.

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Jessica was bored, staring off into space. She was near the front now, and knew that the next time the line moved, she would be getting on the ride.

It’s a nice night. Look at the stars.

She did not see the tall girl in front of her take a quick glance and turn back around.

Several moments later, the line began to move and Jessica snapped back to reality.

------------

Yuri and Junho walked past the counter to go into their compartment, and sat down. The blonde girl who had been standing behind them entered and sat down across from them.

Oh, she is much prettier up close.

Junho looked like he was about to explode in the seat next to her, looked absolutely terrified.

Yuri smiled as the girl sat down, and the girl returned the smile to her.

It was a nice night to be alive.

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Chapter 2

Junho had an interesting habit. Whenever he became nervous, he began to stutter and stammer. It was like an underdeveloped form of Tourette’s syndrome, enhanced in nerve-racking situations.

Junho was beginning to shiver as the engineer operating the Ferris wheel yelled, “And off we go!”

It was a warm night.

Yuri was trying not to laugh at him, staring at her and pleading with his eyes, “help me, help!”

She looked down instead, looked anywhere but at the blonde girl, trying to make the atmosphere as un-awkward as possible. She stared out the window, and saw that out of the corner of her eye that 

the blonde girl, too, was staring out of the window.

Junho let out a deep breath of air and Yuri and Jessica both turned to look at him. His face was crimson.

Yuri chuckled.

How cute.

Junho began to open his mouth to speak, stuttering.

“S-so, uh, w-what’s, uh, y-your n-name?” he directed the question to Jessica.

Jessica smiled and locked eyes with him before responding. Junho looked down at the floor in embarrassment, unable to hold eye contact.

“I’m Jessica, and you two?”

“Uh, um, uh, I-I’m, uh, Jun –

“This is Junho, and I’m Yuri,” Yuri cut in.

Jessica’s eyes switched onto Yuri, and Yuri held her gaze for a few seconds, before Jessica decided that Yuri was more capable of having a conversation.

“So where are you two from?” asked Jessica.

Yuri did not want to bother with telling Jessica the story of her life, did not want to just yet.

“Junho and I grew up here.”

Jessica nodded and smiled, wondering if Yuri would return the question, wondering if she would carry on the conversation. Instead, the girl simply returned to staring out the window. Jessica felt a tug of disappointment. Yuri had seemed interesting.

By this point, Junho gathered his air again, and tried to speak – yet again.

“W-where are you from, J-Jessica?”

“I’m from out of town, just staying here for the summer,” she replied. 

She smiled again at Junho, who began to blush furiously and looked away.

Jessica looked at Yuri, desperate for some form of conversation, and spoke.

“Is there anything to do around here?” asked Jessica.

“Yeah, there’s plenty,” Yuri replied.

She did not want to make eye contact for too long, was afraid of not being able to unlock herself from the gaze, and so she spoke while still staring at the floor.

Jessica continued to stare at Yuri.

“Such as?”

Yuri gave in and looked up.

She has nice eyes.

“Well, there’s the little shops along the street,” she said, while looking at Jessica, “and there’s the nature around here. Plenty of wildlife and hills and beautiful scenery.”

Jessica smiled as the Ferris wheel was beginning to descend.

“Yuri!” Junho gasped, “Yuri, I feel sick.”

Yuri turned to him. He looked very, very sick indeed.

“I think I need to go home,” he gasped, “I’m going to leave, okay?”

The Ferris wheel came to a halt.

“I’ll take you home,” said Yuri, and Jessica looked up in concern. She did not want the ride to end just yet.

“No, no, it’s still early, I’ll get a ride from a friend. You just enjoy yourself. I’ll be okay,” Junho said quickly, while running out as soon as the doors opened.

“Wait!” said Yuri. 

He was already running off.

She sighed and got off the ride, Jessica following behind her.

“Yuri,” Jessica started, as Yuri turned around to face her, “care to show me around?”

She was smiling, full of hope and expectation, full of attachment and curiosity.

Yuri wondered if it would be worth it, to spend her night showing Jessica around, looked into her eyes for a second, and nodded, wondering if the matter would come to concern her desperately, after all.

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Jessica was walking beside Yuri now, who was still looking forward. Jessica looked at Yuri’s closely, the handsome features and pretty eyes; she thought it clashed in a lovely way with her 

soft-spoken demeanor and gentle personality.

“…and over there is the merry-go-round,” said Yuri, “the carnival is nice for us, because we’re just a small town and it’s nice to have some activity every once in a while.”

“It’s really nice here. I haven’t seen any of the scenery yet, though.”

“You’re missing out!” said Yuri, smiling and turning towards Jessica.

They continued to walk on, Yuri still debating.

She spoke suddenly.

“Jessica?”

“Yes?”

“Do you have anyone to show you the scenery around here?”

“No, like I said, I’m from out of town, I don’t really know anyone.”

Jessica voice was underlined with hope; she hoped that Yuri heard it.

“Well, if you want, I’ll show you around some time, just tell me when.”

Jessica smiled, “Okay,” and grabbed Yuri’s hand, dragging her towards the merry-go-round.

“Let’s go on the rides!” 

Jessica was smiling happily.

Yuri was shocked at the sudden touch at first, but began laughing as she felt Jessica pulling her away, pulling her helplessly along.

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The entire night consisted of Yuri showing Jessica a new ride at the carnival, and Jessica demanding to go on it. The entire night was filled with laughter and smiles, was filled with Jessica wanting 

to let down her guard and Yuri debating whether or not to let Jessica past her defenses.

They sat on a bench outside the carnival when all the rides had stopped playing and booths closed, exhausted and content.

I haven’t had this much fun in a long time, thought Jessica to herself.

Yuri was thinking the same, though they both did not know how to voice it, not yet.

Jessica pulled her knees onto the bench and turned towards Yuri, toes nearly touching Yuri’s side.

“Yuri?” said Jessica.

“Yes?” 

“I’m cold.”

It was a warm night.

Yuri raised her eyebrows, looking at Jessica.

“Really? I thought you were from the East Coast?” said Yuri.

“I am, but I have no idea why it’s so cold right now.”

Tactless.

“That’s weird. Well, here, have my jacket,” said Yuri, handing her jacket to Jessica.

I don’t want the jacket, you idiot.

“Never mind, I’m not cold anymore.”

She turned away from Yuri.

“Alright then,” said Yuri. She did not seem bothered much.

Another few moments passed in silence, Jessica ready to try again.

“Yuri?” said Jessica.

“Yes?”

“I don’t know my way home.”

“Where’s your house?”

“On the edge of town, on Mason Drive. It’s a big old thing.”

“Want me to take you home?” asked Yuri, peering at Jessica.

“Yes, please,” said Jessica, smiling. 

Yuri finally returned the smile.

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Yuri began to feel more open in the night time air, breathing in and out. The stars were above, shining brightly – the sky was open; opportunity was waiting to be snatched.

The silence between Yuri and Jessica, for some reason, was not awkward. They were both aware, yet thinking of something similar in the distance. 

Yuri was wondering why she had volunteered to walk Jessica home – she would have to walk in the opposite direction, to the other side of town, to get home. It would take hours, and her feet were 

already worn, but for some reason, she was quietly desperate for more of Jessica – her smile, her eyes, her voice; wanted to be dragged along, dragged along helplessly.

Jessica was wondering why Yuri was so quiet, wanted to be able to speak freely with her, wanted to know her more openly. She did not want to be guarded forever, wanted something to rush into her 

defenses, so she could stop pretending to be detached – she wanted some bond, some form of attachment; she pondered while walking along with Yuri.

In a way, they were thinking of the same thing – each other – speaking without saying a single word, though they both did not know of it, not yet.

“It’s about another half hours walk,” said Yuri, breaking the silence.

“That’s not too bad,” said Jessica,” she wished it would be longer, even if all they would do was bask in the silence together.

Jessica continued, “My parents are probably worried sick right now, since my friends left without me.”

Yuri gave her a reassuring smile, “Don’t worry, I’ll get you home safe.”

Jessica felt a small part of her melt inside, felt her defenses slowly breaking; Yuri was rushing through desperately, hoping there would be no turning back.

It would happen slowly, quickly, both at once, in a wonderful clash.

They were silent until finally reaching the gate of Jessica’s manor – the lights were on and Jessica knew that her parents were waiting, knew that she would not be able to say much to Yuri as soon as 

her parents saw her figure approaching.

Yuri reached to pull open the gate for Jessica, but Jessica’s hand shot out and stopped her.

“Yuri.” she said.

“Yes?”

“You have to show me around, right? You promised.”

Yuri smiled.

“Yeah, I’ll show you around.”

Jessica’s father had opened the door and was calling her name.

“Jessica! Is that you?”

Jessica tore her eyes away from Yuri to look at her father.

“Yes! It’s me, I’m safe. I’m coming!”

She looked back at Yuri, who had pulled the gate open.

Jessica was desperate now.

“Wait, Yuri! When will I see you again?”

“Soon,” said Yuri, in her detached manner, “I promise,” and gave Jessica another reassuring smile.

She closed the gate and Jessica stood on the other side, looking at her.

“Okay, you promised, Yuri.”

“I did.” 

Yuri was all smiles now, and Jessica somehow found inexplicable reassurance in those simple, quiet smiles.

“Okay, see you soon,” Jessica beamed, and turned around to walk towards her father.

She didn’t look back, already knew that she was dragging a part of Yuri along with her, was dragging her along – helplessly.

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Chapter 3

Yuri woke up shortly after the sun rose, exhausted. The night was long and tiring, the walk wore her down and her body was in pain. She came home late, only had a few hours of sleep before having to get up for work.

But today, though tired and exhausted and what else, there was no groan when rising. She was looking forward to the day, looking forward to it much more than she usually did.

Across town, Jessica was being shaken awake by her mother.

“Jessica! Young lady! Get up, please, your father and I want to go somewhere.”

Jessica made a sort of grunting noise into her pillow.

“We want you to come with us, Jessica. Get up, now.”

Another incoherent noise.

Her mother sighed.

“You shouldn’t doze off so much. If you hadn’t dozed off, you wouldn’t have had to walk all the way home with God knows who and you wouldn’t be so tired in the morning.”

Jessica began to snore.

Her mother sighed again as she left the room and closed the door behind her.

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Yuri was walking the path to work again, thinking about Jessica today. She was thinking about her promise, was wondering if she should go visit Jessica today, or perhaps tomorrow, or perhaps in two days. 

She could hardly wait, and smiled happily on her way to work; joyous thoughts putting a bounce in her step.

She reached the dairy with a wide smile on her face, wanting to tell Junho about her night. She looked around for him and realized he wasn’t there.

Yuri approached her manager.

“Mr. Ok, do you know where Junho is?”

“Oh, Yuri, I wanted to talk to you about that.”

“Yes, sir?”

“Junho called in sick this morning, and we really have to get some of this milk out. We need you to cover his shift today. It might take a little longer than usual, but we’ll give you double pay, alright?”

Yuri could not say no, sighed a little bit and nodded.

I guess Jessica will have to wait until tomorrow.

“Good, Yuri! Thanks, I knew I could count on you,” Mr. Ok laughed, 

“When you’re done with your route you just come back here and pick up Junho’s load, alright?”

“Yes, Mr. Ok.”

Never before had she been so desperate, so disappointed. 

She tried to smile when on her route, was even quieter than usual. She avoided all the people today, did not bother to ring doorbells and exchange greetings, only leaving the milk on the doorstep and leaving without a word. 

Never before did she think so much about what she wanted; it had been a long time since she thought about her own desires.

Yuri eventually returned to the store, for her lunch break, missing Junho, missing Jessica, feeling sorry for herself.

I need to stop this. I need to stop this now.

She heaved herself up with a groan and picked up Junho’s load, heading out the door, determined to be detached.

She failed.

--------------

The sun was beginning to set, and there was only one set of bottles to go. 

Yuri looked at the address with her tired, tired eyes.

21234 Mason Drive

Her eyes shot open and she felt her heart skip a beat, the corners of her mouth curved upward involuntarily, and she walked with haste now.

She wondered if Jessica was thinking about her, was scared that she wasn’t, was scared that she wasn’t at home, was scared that the attachment had only been for one night. It was Yuri’s time to herself, the walk to Jessica’s house, her time to mull things over in her head, walking as the sun was setting and stepping closer and closer towards the unknown.

It was dusk when Yuri arrived, and now she reached the familiar fate, except that there was sunlight now, and she noticed the house more carefully. It was not just a house, was closer to a mansion. There were too many rooms to merely be a house, and the lines and stacks of windows looked powerful, rich, screamed wealth and everything that Yuri once had – but no longer.

She was beginning to feel nervous again as she opened the gate and walked towards the door. She realized now that she probably wouldn’t even be able to see Jessica, that she might be greeted by a servant and then turned away politely. She sighed, wondered whether or not to hold on to the last shred of false hope she had, and walked towards the door.

She knocked on the door.

---------------

Jessica awoke as the sun was setting, washed up and headed to the kitchen. Chance would have it, that as she was walking past the main hall, she heard a knock on the door. She shrugged and headed towards the door, reaching it and pulling it open.

She smiled upon opening the door. Her dreams landed on her doorstep.

“Yuri!” Jessica said, excitedly, “You kept your promise.”

Yuri gulped nervously and returned a shaky smile.

“I’m not here to show you around,” Yuri started, and Jessica looked crestfallen, smile wiped off her face.

“No, no, not that,” stammered Yuri, “It’s not that I didn’t come to visit you, but I just have to do something first.”

Jessica eyed the milk bottles in Yuri’s hand.

“Well, come on in,” said Jessica, opening the door and letting Yuri through.

Yuri walked carefully, looked around in hesitation at the beautiful home. She wondered what type of family would have this sort of a manor as merely a summer retreat. She began to look at herself, her shabby clothes and frayed appearance – even her hands! Her hands were the hands of the worker. 

Jessica’s skin was smooth and clean, free of wrinkles and the lines of work and toil.

She gulped again as she sat down in the living room, on a couch across from Jessica.

“So, what first?” said Jessica.

“Oh, I’m here to deliver the milk,” said Yuri, “it’s my job.”

“Why?”

“Why what, Jessica?” Yuri asked.

“Why do you work?”

Yuri shifted uncomfortably in her seat. Jessica had not intended to have this effect, was only curious, but 

Yuri could not know this; was growing steadily and more steadily insecure.

“I have to,” said Yuri.

And she returned to looking at the floor, but could only see Jessica’s shoes – they looked brand new, looked fancy, expensive.

“Well,” said Jessica, “then leave them there and let’s talk.”

She was smiling now, and Yuri only looked at her when she stood up, saw her figure from her back. She was wonderfully clothed, beautiful fabrics; she looked fashionable, high end, even. She wanted to look down again when Jessica turned around and smiled at her, Yuri could do nothing then to resist.

“Well,” Jessica started, “what are you waiting for? Let’s go, Yuri.”

----------------

They were in Jessica’s backyard now, if it could even be called that. Yuri wondered what Jessica meant when she said that she had not yet seen the landscape –here it was, right in her backyard, nature at her fingertips.

“Isn’t it nice, Yuri?” said Jessica.

“The sunset? Yeah, it’s beautiful,” Yuri smiled, was looking at Jessica when she spoke, then looked away quickly, harming her eyes by staring back again at the sun.

“What do you like to do in your free time?”

Yuri pondered the question for a second.

“I just like to relax, and, you know, read or something. What about you?”

“Oh, I like to shop or eat out, travel, stuff like that.”

Two different worlds, Yuri thought to herself.

She shifted uncomfortably again.

“Well, are you going to show me some of the scenery now, or what?”

Yuri looked at her in amazement for a moment, wondering what she considered scenery if not the sunset, opened her mouth to speak, then closed it again, and nodded.

“Sure,” Yuri said, “let’s go.”

---------------

They were walking the path out of town now –it was beautiful and quiet. 

Nothing like the silence to wash out all sound.

They were sitting on a log, near the wild trees that surrounded the small town, looking at a creek that reflected the sunset into their eyes.

Jessica began to tell Yuri about her life.

“Oh, I’m from New York.”

I was from New York, thought Yuri to herself, but I don’t should tell you that just yet.

Jessica continued on, and Yuri was listening without hearing anything, still thinking.

There was still a wall; she did not yet want to share everything with Jessica. On the other hand, Jessica spoke with her eyes unguarded now, so that Yuri could see her honesty, could see everything that she wanted her to. But Yuri had been looking away most of the time –did not know this, did not see the defenses being removed.

“Do you like it here, Yuri?”

“Yes?” Yuri looked at Jessica, back to reality, sun shining on her features and illuminating every curvature, every groove in her face. She was entranced for a second, stayed locked in her eyes as she spoke.

“It’s beautiful, what more could I ask for?” 

Sweet.

“You don’t like the city life? No metropolis?” Jessica asked.

“Those things are all so...sad. It’s sad how you can buy everything now,” said Yuri. 

Perhaps if it was 10 years ago, perhaps if her life had stayed the way it always was, she would have loved the city like Jessica.

“But isn’t it beautiful what people can do, what we can make?” Jessica asked again.

“I think what we can’t make is more beautiful,” responded Yuri.

She did miss the city, truly, but Yuri was getting defiant now. She saw the differences already, like pieces of a puzzle, threatening them both with either a perfect fit or a horrible clash.

Yuri was confused if she wanted to love the city or not, to love anything at all, to stop being detached. It was much more than just loving the city, or loving fashion, or loving objects; it was struggle beyond all reason. It was a choice she would have to make, a choice that would vie thrill and threat, safety and chance.

Yuri continued to stare out at the river as the sun began to set and Jessica fell silent – nothing like silence to wash out all sound. Such a silent affair it was, the calm before the storm, before the quantum leap would be taken –all or nothing; everything, or nothing at all. 

Jessica was thinking to her self, desperately.

Why won’t you look at me?

The desperation grew.

Look at me, Yuri. Just look at me, just once.

Yuri did not turn. She could not see what Jessica was trying to say with her eyes, was still afraid to speak aloud. But Yuri was thinking to herself, as well, debating.

Take a leap, Yuri. Leap forward.

They were both turned forward and watched as the sun finally disappeared.

“Well, shall we head back now?” asked Yuri, shattering the silence.

She wanted to go home, wanted to sleep; for with sleep comes forgetting and dreams and drowning in possibility.

“Sure,” said Jessica, looking Yuri in her eyes, but the sun was gone now and the moon was not nearly as bright, so there could be no leap in the darkness.

Yuri led the way, quietly.

Drag me along, drag me along helplessly, they both thought to themselves, silently.

Nothing like the silence to wash out all sound.

--------------

Chapter 4

After leaving Jessica’s house, Yuri decided to visit Junho. Maybe he could help her this time around, she thought to herself.

So different, we’re just so different.

The words echoed through her mind as she walked along the quiet path in the night, no light, no guidance, no chance to make a leap.

She made her way into Junho’s house, his parents were away for some reason, and she just let herself in. He was on the couch, sitting straight up.

“Who’s there?!?” he yelled frantically, “I’m warning you, I –

“It’s me, Jun. Yuri.” 

Her voice sounded tired, but Junho did not notice, was still hyperventilating from his short lived panic attack.

“How are you feeling, Jun?” Yuri asked.

“Oh my God, Yul, you just scared the living daylights out of me and you have the nerve to –

“It’s actually nighttime, now, Jun, there’s no ‘daylight’ anymore.”

“Well, uh, -

Yuri burst out laughing.

“You are too cute sometimes, Jun. Now, how are you feeling?”

“I’m sick.”

“I know that, Jun. That’s why you’re home. Are you feeling better, worse? Or what?”

“Better, but worse at the same time, Yul!”

“What do you mean? What are you talking about?”

Yuri’s curiosity shot up, she was concerned about Junho.

“Physically, I’m better. But emotionally, Yul, all in here,” he pointed to his chest, “I’m a mess!”

“Wha –

“I’m lovesick! I’ve fallen and I can’t get up.”

Junho was thrashing around on the couch, and Yuri did not know whether to laugh or take him seriously.

“Um, what, Jun? What are you talking about?”

“…It’s nothing, Yul, nothing. How are you?”

“I’m fine, listen Jun, I need to talk to you about something,” she was thinking about Jessica, “it’s –

“It’s Jessica, Yuri!”

“What? Wait, how did you know?”

“What are you talking about, Yuri?” he asked.

Junho was confused, but was only concerned about himself and continued on.

“I think I’m in love, Yuri, I’m in love with Jessica!”

Yuri did not know how to respond, kept quiet, like she always did, as Junho continued.

“She’s so, beautiful, Yul, just so beautiful. Her eyes, they sparkle and it’s like she knows exactly what you are thinking when she looks at you. She makes me feel so different! And her smile –

Yuri wasn’t listening anymore, only thinking to herself.

Yeah, Jun, I know exactly what you mean. 

She smiled sadly to herself, while he talked on and on. 

No comforting words for her tonight, just silence.

-----------------

Yuri walked home after Junho fell asleep, and drowned in her sleep that night, while, across town, Jessica could do anything but sleep.

Restless. Restless were they both, in essence, doing the same thing while not doing the same thing at all.

It seemed to slowly become a pattern.

The dawn cracked. Yuri woke again. No groan, no noise this time around, nothing but silence. Her parents were already gone as she left, as usual, and she walked the path in utter silence – thinking, just thinking.

--------------

Jessica was already up at the crack of dawn, had gotten barely a wink of sleep before she became restless again. She walked into the sitting room, where her parents were already lounging.

“Well, well, you’re up early!” her mother exclaimed.

“Is the world coming to an end?” joked her father.

Jessica smiled, a little unwillingly, and sat down.

“What’s wrong?” her mother asked. Her father put down his newspaper and waited for her to answer.

“Oh, nothing, I just couldn’t sleep for some reason.”

“You? Not able to sleep? Jessica, are you alright, dear? Do you need to go to the doctor?”

“No, no, mom, dad, don’t worry about me. I’m sure it was just this one night. I’ll be fine tonight, I’m sure.”

I’ll be fine when I see Yuri, she thought, and smiled to herself, anticipating when Yuri would knock on her door again.

-----------

Yuri placed her knapsack in the back of the store.

“Yuri?” 

Mr. Ok was calling.

“Yes, Mr. Ok?”

“Junho didn’t call me this morning, is he alright?”

“I think he’s still sick, Mr. Ok.”

I’m sick, too, but I’m still here.

“Would you be willing to cover his shift until he gets better? Just for the week, I’m assuming. Of course, double pay for you.”

Yuri could not say no, once again.

-------------

Jessica was ate breakfast and placed her exhausted self in the sitting room couch, determined to stay awake and wait until Yuri would come.

She has to come. She promised.

The sun was beginning to set as her eyelids became heavy; she could not resist.

No, just a little longer, please.

Her mind drifted off just as a girl with long black hair opened the gate to her manor.

------------

Yuri had saved Jessica’s delivery for last, so she would have nothing to think about except Jessica while she walked the path to her manor, have nothing but the debate she had been fighting all night to ponder.

A part of her wanted to return to knock on the door, wanted Jessica to let her inside, wanted to stay. 

But she didn’t know if she was welcome, just yet – had looked into Jessica’s eyes only when it was too dark to see that the defenses were already down.

So she reached Jessica’s doorstep, and quite simply, stood there. She held her breath, closed her eyes for a while – had been standing there for several minutes – when she put the bottles down next to the welcome mat.

One hand raised, formed a fist, was about to knock on the door, when she hesitated.

Her hand returned to her side, and she sighed heavily, turning on her heels and walking away just as the sun disappeared behind the hills.

---------------

Jessica awoke sometime in the morning, just after the crack of dawn the next day. The light was peering into the windows, and she was confused – thought it was still dusk, thought Yuri might still be coming.

Her mother walked into the sitting room and chuckled.

“You were right, dear, it was just that one night.”

“What, mom? I don’t understand.” Jessica said.

“Your sleep. You just slept for a good 12 hours!”

Jessica’s eyes widened in shock, and she cupped her face with her hands, groaning.

“What’s wrong, honey?”

“Nothing, mom,” said Jessica, trying to smile, “I think I just slept a little too much just now.”

“Oh, honey, too much sleep doesn’t exist for you,” said her mother, chuckling.

Jessica smiled a bit.

“Oh, mom. Did we get any milk yesterday?” asked Jessica.

“Yes, of course, we get milk every day from the dairy in town, dear, why do you ask?”

Jessica smiled; eyes guarded, and stood up.

“Oh, nothing. Just wondering, mom. Well, I’m going to go wash up now, mom. Have a good morning.”

“Alright, dear, take it easy.”

I’m beginning to hate sleep, she thought to herself as she exited the room.

---------------

It was the same day, and the sun was beginning to set again.

Along the path to Jessica’s house walked a milk delivery girl.

Jessica was sitting in the living room next to the main hall, had been sitting and waiting all day, this time, determined to stay awake.

I had my coffee. No way am I sleeping now, and she smiled hopefully to herself.

She was reading next to the fireplace as Yuri approached the doorstep.

From outside, the girl with the long black hair placed the bottles down, lightly, and stopped. A bystander would have thought she was paralyzed.

Her shoulders heaved as she let out a sigh, thinking to herself, as usual.

Her fist rose, slower than yesterday, and today, she picked up the knocker and was about to release it when she placed it back gently. Her hand returned to her side, once again, as she turned on her heels and walked off.

Inside the living was an ever growing impatient Jessica. She knew, since the sun was setting, that Yuri should be, would be coming soon.

She huffed and stood up in frustration. She reached her front door just as Yuri had closed the gate behind her, across the distance of the courtyard.

Yuri was stalking off quickly, as quickly as she could bear, because a part of her was being dragged helplessly, ever so helplessly back to Jessica’s manor; she could not resist the pull, not forever, only needed a little smile and a sweet voice to overtake her completely.

Jessica pulled open the door just as Yuri’s figure was becoming a speck in the distance, path lit by the final rays of the setting sun, growing ever darker by the moment.

“Yuri!” Jessica called, hoping she would turn, speaking just a moment too late – just as the sun disappeared completely and the path was no longer lit.

Her voice echoed; reached Yuri, who spun around on her heels; wanting nothing more than to be dragged away towards the girl with the blonde hair.

But she could not see – it was too dark, and Jessica could no longer see Yuri, did not know if it was her imagination that created the speck in the distance; and so Jessica did not call again, with the voice that could have dragged Yuri back to her.

Yuri sighed to herself.

I must be imagining it.

And, once again, she turned on her heels as the echo was drowned out and silence overtook all.

Nothing like silence to wash out all sound.

----------------

The next few days passed in dull, dull routine; filled with hands raised, ready to knock, but once again falling to the side; and a blonde girl falling asleep in the living room. Disappointment all around.

On the third day, Jessica awoke at sunrise, of her own accord, refreshed. 

No longer would she wait.

She drove to town that day, during the time she knew was Yuri’s break.

She entered the store, meeting the eye of several of the workers.

“Excuse me,” she said to a man sitting on the counter, “do you know where I could find Yuri?”

He made a sort of half-grunting noise and motioned to the back of the store, in the storage room.

“Thank you,” she said, as she walked away and the eyes followed her.

She entered the storage room, where a desolate Yuri was sitting.

---------------

Yuri was alone, in the storage room where she wallowed now because she did not know what else to do. 

I hate this, I hate this self-pity, all this –

The door opened, and Yuri looked up in wonder. She stopped breathing entirely for a while, could not speak.

“Hi, Yuri,” said Jessica, smiling, as she walked down the small staircase and approached Yuri.

“J-Jessica? Hi. What are you doing here?”

Yuri was stammering. Inconvenient, the habit could be, exposing all the emotions behind defenses.

“Well, you didn’t come to me, so I came to you.”

Jessica was still smiling, still trying to make eye contact with Yuri, who looked everywhere but at Jessica.

“I-I don’t understand.”

“You disappeared, Yuri,” Jessica started. 

She sounded hurt. 

“You didn’t come back,” the smile turned sad, “You won’t even look at me. What’s wrong?”

“What are you talking about, Jessica?” 

“What do you mean, Yuri?”

“Why would you even want me to come back?”

Yuri’s voice was filled with spite and fear.

“Yuri! What are you talking about, we’re friends, Yuri! Of course I would want you in my life!”

She was beginning to raise her voice in frustration.

“I don’t get you, Yuri,” said Jessica, continuing, “You were so nice to me, and now, I get this.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” said Yuri, defiant.

“Yes, you do, Yuri. Stop playing this game. Stop doing this. What’s the matter?”

Everything.

“Nothing, Jessica. Nothing is the matter.”

“Yuri!”

Jessica was yelling, now.

“What?!?” yelled Yuri, right back at her, looking into her eyes, now. Wrong time – all she could see was anger, no defenses – she overlooked the defenses.

“Tell me what’s wrong! I want to help if –

“Junho likes you!”

“What? What does that have to do with anything?” said Jessica in confusion.

“He likes you. What if he gets jealous that I’m with you all the time? He’s my friend, Jessica, my best friend. I don’t want to hurt him. And I’m sorry.”

Yuri finished speaking and looked away again, rose and walked past Jessica, up the stairs and out the door.

Jessica spun around as the door was closing, speaking to Yuri softly.

“But I like you, Yuri…”

The door clicked, and the storage room was silent.

Too late.

Nothing like silence to wash out all sound.

---------------------

Chapter 5

It was Yuri’s lunch break the next day, and once again, there was Jessica. Junho had healed and was back to work, but said he didn’t feel well enough to go out on his rounds, and so he was only in the factory working the machines that processed the milk.

Yuri did not stay in the storage room anymore, wanted to avoid any possible confrontation with Jessica.

Junho and Yuri were sitting behind the counter as Jessica continually tried to speak to Yuri. She got no response, as Junho looked at Yuri curiously.

“What’s wrong?” he mouthed.

“I’ll tell you later,” said Yuri quietly.

Jessica gave up after a few minutes, and everyone in the store was watching the scene in amazement. 

Never before had Yuri been so rude.

“I’ll be back!” Jessica huffed, as she turned away and headed out the door.

A small part of Yuri died and she finally looked up again; just a moment too late – as usual.

“What’s up with you?” asked Junho.

“Nothing, I just don’t want to talk to her. That’s it.”

No, that’s not it, that’s not it at all.

Junho looked at Yuri for a moment, expression confused, then finally made up his mind.

“Oh, okay,” he said, smiling, “so the other day –

The boy never noticed anything much, really.

---------------

The phase continued for several days, until Yuri did not know how much longer she could resist the urge to be dragged away by Jessica, helpless; and so she locked herself in the storage room, again – but this time, there was actually a lock on the door, so that no one could let her out except herself.

She even locked Junho out, wanted to be alone, and Junho didn’t want to be in the room anyway – he only wanted to rant and blab to whoever would listen.

Jessica continued to return to the store, standing at the door for several days, and then finally realizing there was a better way to know what she wanted to.

“Junho,” she called one day as she entered the store.

“Oh, uh, hi Jessica,” said Junho, as he looked up from behind the counter.

“Yuri’s still in the –

“Oh, I wanted to talk to you, Junho, if you’re not busy.”

She was smiling.

“S-sure!” stammered Junho.

----------------

They were sitting behind the counter now, talking about anything and everything Jessica wanted to know.

“Tell me about Yuri, please,” said Jessica.

“Oh, Yuri! She’s an interesting one. Haha!”

Junho looked to Jessica for her reaction.

Oh, so he’s one of those people. I need to react every 5 seconds for him to keep talking.

She forced a weak chuckle.

Junho looked satisfied enough, and smiled brightly.

“Okay! Well, she wasn’t born here, ya know, she was born in New York, I think –

“Wait, what?”

Junho looked at her curiously. He obviously did not like being interrupted in his storytelling.

“Sorry, continue, forget I said anything,” said Jessica.

She smiled.

Talk, dammit, thoughts ringing through gritted teeth.

Junho smiled again.

“Oh, right! So Yuri, born in New York. Her parents were really, really rich I heard, some sort of investment thing on what’s that one wall? That thing. Oh wait, or was it a street? I think –

“Wall Street?” asked Jessica.

“Right! Wall Street. The wall of streets! Her parents were really rich –

Jessica resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Dealing with idiots was not one of her favorite pastimes, was one of the few times she did not appear perfectly refined.

About one hour later, when the break had ended, and Junho was told Jessica everything he knew, she was almost in tears; was trying to maintain her composure in front of Junho.

I never knew.

She forced another smile.

“Listen, Junho, thanks so much for the talk, I really enjoyed it.”

“Oh sure!” said Junho, “Anything you need, just ask me!”

The stutter was long gone, had been replaced by excitement.

“About that,” started Jessica, smiling, once again.

Junho looked confused, before smiling and making up his mind.

Jessica left the shop with a smirk that day.

-----------------

It was the lunch break the next day, and Yuri was heading to the storage room again, to lock herself away. She entered and looked for the key in her knapsack and could not find it.

What? It was here in the morning, I remember putting in my bag…

Suddenly, someone entered and closed the door behind her – someone with blonde hair and business to settle.

“Jessica?” said Yuri, in shock, “What are you doing?”

Jessica locked the door behind her and stuck a key in her pocket.

She spun around to face Yuri, smiling.

“Hi, Yuri.”

What a cheery smile it was.

“How on earth did you get that key? And that lock? Did you go through my bag? Oh my God, Jessica, seriously? Come on, now! That’s –

“Yuri,” Jessica started, “I’m not the type to do that.”

She looked like she was taking to a 5 year old, with a smug smile on her face.

“Then how?”

“Oh, I just asked Junho to take the keys and lock for me.”

She was still smiling nonchalantly.

Yuri could not believe it.

“Come on! You have got to be kidding me! Junho? That kid –

“Yuri,” said Jessica, tone serious now, “forget about the lock. I want to talk to you.”

She stopped smiling, and Yuri swallowed the lump in her throat. The atmosphere changed a little too suddenly for comfort.

Jessica walked towards Yuri, who had sat down on the floor at this point, resigned. Jessica plopped down next to her and locked eyes.

This time, there was enough light, enough honesty, enough openness.

“What do you want to talk about, Jessica?”

“You, Yuri. I want to talk about you.”

Yuri did not respond, was looking at Jessica to continue, was transfixed in those eyes; defenseless.

“I was talking to Junho these past few days –

“Oh, so that’s what you were doing,” said Yuri darkly.

She sounded a little annoyed.

Jessica smiled to herself.

Cute.

“Anyway,” Jessica continued, “he told me about more about you. Since you wouldn’t talk to me, I had to get it from someone else.”

Jessica’s voice had returned to its sweet tone.

“...I see...”

“What’s wrong, Yuri?”

“What did he tell you?”

Yuri was afraid now, afraid of being exposed. At least those who were born poor and stayed poor had some stability. She had fallen, did not want Jessica to know.

“He told me…about your past, about you family, about your story.”

Yuri did not respond.

“I’m sorry,” Jessica said.

“Really?” said Yuri, “Is that all you want to talk about?”

“What?” said Jessica, confused.

“I’m not looking for your pity, Jessica,” her voice was beginning to fill with venom, “I don’t need you to feel sorry for me. If that’s all you wanted to talk about –

“No that’s not all!” cried Jessica.

Yuri stopped speaking, paralyzed.

“There’s so much more, Yuri. I want to know more about you, and I want to hear it from you. I didn’t want to ask Junho, but you left me no option, no choice. Next time you should just talk to me instead of ignoring me.”

There it was, the hurt again.

“I don’t understand,” said Yuri.

“What? How can I make it any clearer?”

Jessica’s tone was pleading, now – desperate.

Yuri looked into her eyes; had been looking into her eyes for while now; did not know if she was seeing what she wanted to; or if she was merely imagining those defenseless, open eyes.

“Why?” said Yuri softly, “Why would you want to know about me?”

She already knew, but needed to hear it – words could work wonders, sometimes.

“Because I like you.” 

Eyes transfixed, it was a long coming moment of chance and fate, with no reasons at all, just unconscious searching.

There was a moment of silence that fell between them, defenses all gone.

Nothing like silence to wash out all sound.

-----------------

Chapter 6

Jessica looked away from Yuri, now. She knew that her eyes had done their job, had shown their sincerity, and nervousness soon ensued.

Yuri did not know what to say, wanted to believe it, but still couldn’t – not yet.

“Is this your response, Yuri? Nothing?” Jessica asked.

“No, it’s not.”

“Then what?”

“It’s just that, I don’t think you like me.”

“Yuri, I –

“Jessica, you don’t like me, you can’t!”

“Why not, Yuri? What are you talking about?”

Jessica was getting heated at this point, was beginning to lose her temper.

Yuri was thinking, about to speak.

How can I reach you if we’re in two different worlds?

“I-It’s just that, you can’t. I don’t think it’s possible. I can’t really believe it.”

“How do you feel about me, Yuri?”

“I – uh…”

Yuri paused, for just a little too long, testing Jessica’s patience for just a little too long.

“What?!?” cried Jessica.

“I don’t know, Jessica! I don’t know if I’m right for you.”

Jessica cried out in indignation, in disbelief. She looked around the room, trying to divert her anger, but it would not leave.

She looked back at Yuri, looked into her eyes and tried to read her thoughts; she wondered if she stared hard enough, if she would be about to see what Yuri was feeling – after all, it was almost impossible to hide love.

Jessica caught a glimpse of what she wanted to see, and still heated, came closer to Yuri.

Yuri backed up slightly, as a reactive instinct, but did not go far enough.

Jessica grabbed Yuri’s shirt collar and kissed her. Yuri’s eyes were open at first, then closed for a moment before Jessica pulled away. 

That was short…, Yuri thought to herself.

“There,” said Jessica, out of breath, “You stole my first kiss.”

Her cheeks were beginning to show signs of a blush.

Yuri looked at Jessica, now, expression unreadable.

Jessica grew afraid.

“What?” she said.

“I don’t want it,” Yuri replied.

“Huh?”

Jessica’s look was one of confusion.

“I don’t want your first kiss.”

“Well, too bad, Yuri, because –

“Here, take it back,” said Yuri. 

And she moved towards Jessica this time, cupping Jessica’s face in her hands and placing lips upon lips, eyes closed.

Much better, thought Yuri to herself.

The kiss was sweet, prolonged, even, as Jessica wrapped her arms around Yuri’s neck and –

The door opened, and there stood Junho, watching in horror, holding a wrench in one hand and a broken lock in the other.

“Wha –

Yuri and Jessica broke apart and looked away from another, embarrassed.

“Junho!” said Yuri, “What are you doing here?”

“I heard yelling, and I thought I should check, so I got the wrench and popped the lock – no wait! What do you mean, what am I doing? What are you two doing?!?”

“Listen, Junho, I can explain,” started Yuri, and Jessica got up and made for the door.

Yuri looked up in alarm and followed her.

“After I take Jessica home,” Yuri finished quickly, passing Junho, mouth still agape in shock.

-----------------

Jessica was walking away quickly from the store, with Yuri running behind to catch up.

“Jessica!” Yuri cried, and Jessica spun around and faced her, walking backwards now.

“Hurry up,” she smiled playfully; and Yuri gladly obliged, was being dragged along helplessly.

Yuri and Jessica walked side by side, quiet at first, not knowing what to say; the first kiss is always best soaked in silence thereafter.

Yuri looked shy, while Jessica was smiling brightly to herself; clinging on to Yuri’s arm and resting her head on Yuri’s shoulder while she was walking.

Yuri’s hands stayed in her pockets throughout the walk home; the silent, silent walk washed them both away, together; both thinking about how puzzle pieces could complete each other.

They reached the gate and let themselves in, walking towards the door.

They were standing on Jessica’s doorstep now, Yuri one step below, not ready to let her go. Jessica tried to pull her hand away only to have Yuri hold on more tightly, clinging on to her and bringing her closer.

“Wait!” said Yuri, shyly, as Jessica smiled down at her.

“Hmm?”

“What does this mean?” Yuri asked.

“What are you talking about, Yuri?”

“D-Does this mean, um, we’re d-dating?”

Yuri looked away from Jessica’s eyes, at the ground, embarrassed.

Jessica approached her, and with her hand, turned her face towards her once again; smiling; locking eyes so she could see the truth, no longer covered by any defenses.

They stayed locked in opposing, defenseless, helpless gazes for a short, short while, before Jessica leaned in and kissed Yuri sweetly.

This time, neither of them were thinking anything at all; only silence.

They broke apart and Jessica smiled, turned away and entered her home, with Yuri still watching until the door finally closed.

No sigh, no heave, no groan, as Yuri turned away and walked; but she was not walking away at all, was being dragged helplessly, ever so helplessly, back to Jessica.

Yuri’s walk back to the dairy was quiet, as she closed her eyes and soaked in the kiss.

Nothing like the silence to drown in all memories of sound.

----------------

Yuri caught Junho just as he was walking out of the dairy.

“Junho! Wait!”

He spun around, and smiled, “oh, hi Yul!”

Yuri was wondering why he could still be smiling, if he was hiding the hurt behind the smile.

“Are you alright, Jun?”

“Huh? I was healed for a few days now, Yuri, are you okay? Is it memory loss? Something in your milk? Something in the food? Maybe –

“No, it’s not that,” Yuri said, flabbergasted.

“Then what?”

“ You aren’t mad at me?”

“Huh? About what?”

Yuri was amazed in a not so amazing way.

“About…Jessica?”

“Oh yeah, her.”

Junho looked down.

“Look, Jun, I’m sorry, it just happened and I couldn’t do anything –

“She keeps bothering me!” cried Junho indignantly, looking back up.

“What?”

“She’s always asking me about you, and I swear I don’t mind, but she always interrupts me when I’m speaking,” he groaned and continued, “I don’t like it when I get interrupted! Especially when its them that ask me something! Obviously, I have something they ought to listen to!”

Yuri felt a small wave of relief wash over her.

“So…you don’t like her anymore?” she asked.

“What? Oh, Yuri, that was last week! And I was sick. I wasn’t right in the head–I have someone else now.”

Yuri raised her eyebrows and looked Junho.

Wow, that was quick, she thought to herself.

Junho began to ramble, “Oh my goodness, this new girl, her name –

Yuri was not listening anymore, only relaxing in her thoughts, relieved and content.

It was a good day to be alive.

--------------- 

Chapter 7

Crack of dawn, awaken and rise. Soon Yuri walked into the dairy, again, only to run into a hyper Junho.

“Yul! Yul! Yul!” he yelled from behind the counter, practically jumping up and down.

“Hey Jun! Good morning.”

She was all smiles today.

Yuri continued to the storage room as Junho followed alongside, still yelping uncontrollably.

“Yuri! Yuri!”

“Yes, Junho?”

She was still walking, still smiling subtly to herself.

“Did you hear about the party tonight? The ball, or dance, sort of thing, and I’m sure you’ll be invited!”

“What? How would I be invited if I didn’t even hear about it until right now? That’s –

“Jessica’s parents are hosting it, Yul! I’m sure she’ll invite you! Oh boy, you’ve got connections now, Yul!”

“Really?” Yuri said, smiling.

Junho continued on.

“Oh my God, Yul! I’m so jealous! I’m sure there will be plenty of pretty girls there, just floating around –

“I thought you liked that other girl?” asked Yuri quizzically.

“Yuri! That was yesterday, try to follow along, will you? Jeez! Anyway…”

Yuri rolled her eyes as she and Junho walked to the front of the dairy again, preparing for their daily rounds.

“…and I wonder what food they’ll have there, Yul! You must tell me all about it tomorrow, okay? Okay. Good. I’m glad that’s –

“First off, Jun, I’m not even invited yet. Second, can I have one of your rounds? Just the one on Mason Drive.”

“Why?”

“Jun, don’t ask and just do it, please.”

“Fine, fine. Tell me about it later?”

“Of course, now gimme!” Yuri said, while playfully snatching away Jessica’s delivery. 

----------------

Yuri had saved Jessica’s package for last, as usual, so she could have nothing but Jessica to look forward to during her day. The path was always marked with silence and thoughts and memories, for Yuri to soak in while walking.

She reached the gate and opened it slowly, ever so slowly, trying not to rush, trying to savor every drop of anticipation she would have before she saw Jessica again.

Jessica was already sitting on the porch, waiting for Yuri today, smiling brightly from across the courtyard.

Yuri ran, could not help it, smiling the entire way.

She stopped when she reached Jessica, awkwardly, now not knowing what to do. All she could do was smile and stand.

“Hi,” Yuri started, “I brought the milk.”

Jessica was giggling.

“I see,” she chuckled, “how are you?”

“I’m great!” replied Yuri, a little too enthusiastically, with a wide smile.

So cute, thought Jessica to herself.

“What about you?” asked Yuri.

“Same. I wanted to talk to you about something. Will you sit?” she said, pointing to a chair next to hers.

“Sure,” Yuri replied, and placed the milk bottles down, then sitting next to Jessica.

“What is it?” asked Yuri.

Her mind was racing now, all possibilities rushing through and insecurities drowning her.

What if she’s breaking up with me?

What if it was all a joke?

Her heart began to race, as Jessica began speaking.

What if –

“Are you busy tonight?”

Yuri sighed in relief and smiled.

“No, I’m not.”

“Good! Can you come back here tonight? In a few hours? My parents are hosting a ball and I can’t wait to introduce you to them.”

“Y-Your parents?” Yuri asked.

“Yes, my parents. I think they’ll like you, Yuri.”

Jessica was still smiling, reassuring Yuri with every second that passed, reassuring her with every moment that she spent looking into her eyes.

“Sure,” said Yuri; her confidence was being slowly built up.

Yuri left Jessica’s house soon after, after a sweet, short kiss; she left impatient for the several hours in the future when she would be returning; being dragged helplessly, yet again.

Nice day, Yuri thought to herself as she was walking away.

-------------

Yuri was rummaging through her closet furiously, in a frantic panic.

Where is that dress?

“Aha!” she exclaimed in triumph as she found the object of her desire.

It was perhaps not as finely made as Jessica’s clothing, or as pretty, or as pricey, but the intent to which it was worn would compensate for all that it lacked; at this rate, Yuri would impress Jessica no matter what she wore.

Yuri prepared herself for the event, looked in the mirror and did a twirl in her flowey summer dress, and set off. 

She stopped by the local florist along the way, and stood there for a while, contemplating her choices.

I wonder which kind is Jessica’s favorite…

Daisies? No, too bright and simple.

Roses? No, too merose.

Tulips? Lilacs? Sunflowers?

This continued on for a while, until Yuri finally stumbled upon a small, lone vase of beautiful flowers in the corner of the store. She had already stopped walking, stopped searching, was ready to give up when she saw them.

Lilies. Beautiful, sophisticated, intricate –yet so simple and pure.

Perfect.

Yuri paid for the lilies and left the shop with a content smile, setting off with a brisk pace, moving with haste.

-----------------

Jessica was sitting on the porch of her manor, which was filled with people and food and laughing and music and dancing; she was alone because she was waiting. The sun had already set and nighttime was making itself at home, and still no sign of Yuri.

She had dressed especially carefully tonight, for Yuri, and yet, she had not shown.

Jessica sighed just as her mother walked out to the porch away from the frolics inside the manor.

“Jessica? Dear? Will you come inside? What’s wrong?”

“Oh, nothing mother, just looking at the stars, and how they’re always here on time – every night.”

She sounded bitter, and her mother raised her eyebrows.

Jessica continued – “Oh, and I need some peace and quiet.”

“Well, you’ve been sulking for God knows why and God knows how long out here for quite some time now. You hurry on inside, soon, okay? I’m sure you’ll have fun.”

“Okay, thanks mom.”

Jessica decided to wait for just a little longer as Yuri was ever delayed by her visit to the florist and her long trek, all the way across town, to Jessica’s home.

Crickets began to chirp. Silence. Leaves cracked. Silence.

Jessica stood up in frustration and headed inside, looking to have the fun she intended to hours before, the thought of Yuri still lingering the back of her mind.

--------------

Yuri reached the party quite late, but determined nonetheless. She was holding the bouquet of lilies in her hand and wore her heart on her sleeve.

She walked past the gate and through the doors, and then stopped dead in her tracks.

There was Jessica – beautiful, no doubt; lovely, no doubt; exquisite and simple and intricate all at once, no doubt; but also, in the arms of a man whom Yuri did not recognize.

She stood in the back of the room watching Jessica and the man dance.

He was tall, good looking, looked well-bred and well-off. He had a charming smile, was even more charming when smiling at Jessica, who seemed to gladly return the smile. 

His arms were around her; and hers around him; as they danced on and on for a while; Yuri watching all the while, but in the back of the room, where Jessica could not see her, could not make eye contact and explain everything with a simple, unguarded glance.

Yuri was too far away to see that even though Jessica smiled at the man, it was a smile with guarded, defended, careful eyes. She could not see what she needed to.

In time, the band stopped playing, and Jessica and the man, who were the center of attention, and the room, finally stopped dancing.

Jessica gave him a small smile as a man who Yuri assumed to be Jessica’s father, standing near the couple, spoke.

“Oh my, look at them! Don’t they just look marvelous together? What a good match it would be! What a fine, handsome, young man you’ve grown into, Ok Taecyeon! No one would object if you were with a beautiful, young lady, right? Ha!”

He chuckled loudly and the room laughed along, smiling.

Taecyeon looked at Jessica shyly, smiling – enarmored.

Jessica smiled in embarrassment and looked away, excusing herself and walking to the dining hall to cool off.

She did not see Yuri – Yuri had already gone from the manor, was sitting on the porch now, by herself, sulking and wallowing in her thoughts.

---------------

Jessica was drinking ice cold water, sitting by herself in the kitchen, when Taecyeon entered, holding a bouquet of flowers.

“Hey!” he smiled.

“Hi,” she returned the smile.

“I just wanted to thank you for the dance tonight, and the party,” he said.

“Oh, that was no problem, anytime.”

Another polite smile.

“Here,” he said, “as a token of my appreciation.”

He placed the bouquet in front of her on the table.

“I hope we’ll see each other around sometime, Jessica. It was nice getting to know you a little better.”

“Oh, sure, anytime,” she said, and tried to not make eye contact.

“Well, I’m going back now. Maybe I’ll see you around?”

“Maybe.”

A final polite smile.

“Alright,” Taecyeon said, as he left the kitchen.

Jessica looked at the flowers now. Daisies.

Too simple. Too bright. But nice of him. Still, I prefer lilies.

She sighed and peered into the room where all the guests where socializing.

No sign of Yuri.

She frowned and made her way outside to the porch, through a different exit and approached the front of her home.

She stopped when she saw a bouquet of flowers scattered on the steps – crushed.

Lilies?

She looked around to see if anyone was there, but whoever had left them was already long, long gone.

------------------

Chapter 8

“Junho,” said Yuri the next morning, “I have a favor to ask.”

“What is it?” replied Junho.

He had already forgotten everything he said to Yuri yesterday.

“Please give me all your delivery routes.”

“What? Wait, why?”

“I don’t know. I just feel like getting out of the factory. I need to be out there, by myself.”

“What about me? What will I do?”

“I already asked Mr. Ok and he said that it would be alright if you just worked in the processing factory instead of doing your routes. C’mon, Jun! You can talk to everyone in the factory. You can hardly have a decent conversation with anyone while you are out –

“You make a good point!” exclaimed Junho, “I accept.”

“Really?” said Yuri, “You’re the best, Jun, thanks.”

“Gee, I can not wait to tell everyone about my day, and this girl I met yesterday. Did I tell you, Yuri? She is so amazing…”

Yuri tried to smile as she was listening to Junho, but could only force so much.

It would be a long day.

----------------

Jessica awoke the next morning, early, and still frustrated from the night before.

Yuri had not shown, and she thought that it was a sign that Yuri did not want to meet her parents, was not yet willing to truly commit to their relationship.

Or maybe something came up, she thought,maybe she’s sick or something. I should go check on her.

Jessica was waiting until Yuri’s lunch break to enter the factory; was expecting to see Yuri there; was expecting some explanation or excuse to make her feel better.

Yuri was not there. She was actually skipping her lunch, skipping it so she could finish her routes as quickly as possible, so she could avoid seeing Jessica. Yuri knew that Jessica would come looking for her, since she had not seen her last night at the party.

But I was there, thought Yuri bitterly to herself, I was there, and I saw you. I saw everything.

Yuri was at Jessica’s house now, no longer saving it for last, only wanting to get it over as quickly as possible so she could go home and sleep – drown in her exhaustion and memories of silence.

-------------

“Junho?” said Jessica.

She was looking around the dairy.

“Yes?” he replied.

“Do you know where Yuri is?”

“I actually have no idea. She’s been gone all morning, out on her delivery route.”

“But shouldn’t she be back for lunch?”

“Yeah, but she covered my shift today for me. Said she needed to be alone or something. Maybe she has somewhere to go later so she’s trying to finish her route early. I don’t know –

“Alright, thank you,” said Jessica, uncertainly, with a weak smile, and turned and left the store.

She was drowning in loud thoughts of uncertainty, now.

-------------

Yuri returned the store later that day, after finishing all her rounds. She headed to the storage room to pick up her bag, where she ran into Junho.

“Yul,” he said, “I think you ought to know that Jessica was here earlier, looking for you.”

“Oh, really?” she said, “Thanks for telling me.”

She picked up her bags as Junho began to question her.

“Yul? What’s wrong? Usually you’d being jumping up and down when you hear that she visits. What is it? Lovers’ quarrel? Listen to me, being in a relationship takes work, I got a lot of exper –

“I said, thank you, Junho. I’m tired. I’m going to head home now, alright? Good night.”

She really was tired, and Junho let her go, still confused.

------------

The pattern continued for the next several days, with Jessica trying desperately to find Yuri, to talk to her, and Yuri still avoiding her.

Yuri would look forward to sleeping every night, so she could just escape reality for a little bit, so she could visit the Jessica that was in her arms and her arms only in her dreams.

Jessica could not sleep at all, was only listening to the silence of the night and thinking about Yuri, about how much she missed her and needed to see her, touch her, hear her voice again.

It continued this way, until one day, Jessica was too desolate and desperate for Yuri, had to do something. 

She entered the dairy some time during the day.

“Junho?” she asked.

“Oh, hi, Jessica. If you’re looking for Yuri, she’s not here today. Today is her day off.”

“I need her address, Junho. Can I have it, please?”

“Oh, um, sure!”

“Thanks,” and she truly smiled for the first time in several days.

-------------

Jessica looked down at the address in front of her.

2340 Mason Drive

She smiled to herself.

Same street, opposite ends. Same town, different sides. Just like us.

It was night when she reached Yuri’s farm, in its openness and middle of nowhere location, and smiled.

There was a short fence, and when Jessica tried calling several times to no avail, she let herself in. 

She saw footsteps in the dust that looked about the size of Yuri’s feet headed somewhere to the side of the house, and into the stable. Jessica followed the trail and ended up several feet away from Yuri, who was tending to a horse in a stall.

“Yuri,” she called.

Yuri turned around.

“Oh, hi Jessica,” she said, and turned back around, resuming her grooming of the horse.

“Yuri, what’s wrong? Why won’t you look at me?”

“Nothing’s wrong, Jessica.”

They were both getting more and more frustrated.

“Fine,” snapped Jessica, “Why weren’t you at the party, Yuri? I waited for you and you never came.”

Yuri was beginning to feel the rush of blood and heat overtake her, but managed to still stay somewhat calm.

“I don’t know,” said Yuri, through gritted teeth.

Her voice was cold, and she turned a little bit this time, to glare at Jessica, bitterness and resentment shining through.

Jessica felt her heart drop in fear.

No longer angry, Jessica spoke again.

“Yuri,” she crooned softly, “yes, you do know why. Please tell me what’s wrong.”

Yuri snapped, could not handle the too quick switch of emotions.

“I was at the party!” she began, “I was there, Jessica, and I saw you in another man’s arms! Taecyeon, is it? Dancing away! Smiling! Even your father was smiling, even him! He must love him, too, huh?”

She smiled bitterly.

“Yuri,” started Jessica, “Taecyeon is nothing to me. It was just a dance, Yuri, just a dance. Let it go.”

“No, Jessica, I can’t let it go. It’s not just a dance! It’s not just any other man! I don’t want anyone else to look at you like that, Jessica. It can only be me. I want you to be only mine. That is the only way!”

Jessica was feeling the emotions rushing to her eyes, to her hands; the emotions had been contained for too long, were overwhelming her now – she needed Yuri to take the load off of her.

And so Jessica wrapped her arms around Yuri and pulled her into a passionate kiss. It was sudden and quick, and Yuri’s weight pushed Jessica all the way to the stacks of hay in the corner. They had both collapsed now, on top of each other, emotions overflowing and lips moving against one another – saying all that they wanted to, silent except for the sound of breathing.

Yuri shifted her body to be completely on top of Jessica’s now, while Jessica softly held Yuri’s hands, and guided them to places on her body that no one but herself had touched before – she began to let out soft moans and Yuri explored the body below her.

They would have continued, but Yuri broke away from the kiss, stopped moving, and looked into Jessica’s eyes.

“What is it, Yuri? Why are you stopping?” Jessica asked.

“Are you sure about this?” Yuri asked, “What about your parents?”

“My parents think I’m at a friend’s house.”

Jessica was sounding impatient now.

“But what about my other question, Jessica? Are you sure about –

Jessica pulled Yuri back into the kiss and continued to guide Yuri’s hands, once again.

No thoughts, just quiet moans and whimpers of satisfaction. No clothes, no more subtle reaches; only open, ardent passion were in the stable now, between them. The hands were travelling and points reached that had never been reached before, transferring all emotions between them – it was a long night in the stable, filled with what they had both been bottling up for so long.

And then; finally, there was only heavy breathing; followed by a soft kiss; ended by silence. The quiet took over as two bodies drifted off to sleep in the stable.

Nothing like the silence to soak in anything and everything.

-------------------

Chapter 9

The dawn cracked, and open shot Yuri’s eyes. She was about to rise when she realized there was a weight across her chest – Jessica.

She glanced at Jessica’s face, lovingly, and smiled.

What a nice morning. What a nice night.

Yuri thought about last night for a moment – the most memorable night of her life to date; even now she could remember every touch and feel, every emotion; and yet, it had passed much too quickly for her.

She closed her eyes for several moments to experience it all again in her mind, to replay some of the drowning she had felt yesterday – on a level she had never felt before; she could recall the burning, lingering touch of Jessica’s fingertips, could feel the blood pounding to her head all over again when she remembered every soft caress – she was drowning in ecstasy, by mere thought of memory and silence of sound.

Yuri leaned in softly and kissed Jessica on the forehead – sweetly, with the remnants of last night’s passion, still seeping through – softly, ever so softly.

Jessica made her selfish. Never before did Yuri want something merely for the sake of wanting it, never before did she feel as is she needed something that she had not needed before; she wondered how she had lived before Jessica. It seemed that Jessica dominated her life now – and it was perfectly alright. 

She was always content, but Jessica left her wanting more; that was the emotion seeping through, still. It was an endless flood that threatened to consume them both – and it would be perfectly alright.

Jessica was already awake, hopeless and helpless. She did not want to move, though she had actually awoken much earlier than Yuri; she wanted to remain forever, hoped that Yuri would not budge.

For Jessica, it was a different form of gratification. Until now, she had only known one type of love – the love she had with her family. She had been missing for so long the romantic love, eros, that Yuri was not only new, but welcome; an attraction that she could not explain, sweet and gentle, taunting her, and fulfilling her in ways before unknown.

She felt Yuri kiss her forehead, and knew that she had to leave now.

Jessica let out an audible sigh and Yuri leaned into her ear and whispered, “Good morning.”

It sent a warm shiver down her smile and set a smile upon her face.

------------------

They had moved to put their clothes on and were outside now, glancing at the sunrise as they were walking to the fence. They were about to exit the grounds when suddenly Yuri’s front door opened.

“Yuri?” called her father, “Who’s that you have there?”

Yuri and Jessica spun around in surprise.

“Oh, hi dad. Good morning.”

She smiled nervously while Jessica stood next to her, smiling politely.

“Oh, right,” said Yuri as her father looked at Jessica, “This is Jessica. Jessica, this is my father.”

“Hi, Jessica, how are you?” 

Yuri’s father was smiling cheerfully.

“Good morning, Mr. Kwon. I’m great, how are you?”

“Can’t complain!” he beamed, “You two will join us for breakfast, right? It would be rude to let a guest leave hungry!”

He chuckled to himself as Jessica looked to Yuri, who shrugged and began to guide her inside.

“Come on in!” Yuri’s father bellowed from the front door, motioning them inside.

They were sitting down, now, after Jessica had been introduced to Yuri’s mother as well.

Yuri’s parents seemed to already approve of the couple as they refused any and all help that was offered.

“Oh, Mr. Kwon, is there any way I can help –

“No, no, silly child, just sit down. Next to Yuri. Right there. Good, good.”

Then Mr. Kwon would smile at his wife and she would smile back, and resume to setting the table and cooking the food.

Yuri was shaking her head in amazement at her parents, looking at Jessica and laughing.

“I think they like you,” she said.

“I like them, too, Yuri,” Jessica replied, chuckling.

Eventually, the four were at the table, eating their food and having a rather nice conversation; simple and plain, but loving, all at once.

“So, where are you from, Jessica?” Yuri’s father asked.

“Oh, I’m from New York,” she replied.

“Oh! Did you know we’re from New York as well?”

“Yes, I did. Small world.”

They chuckled, the four of them, over small things like that. Small talk, paving the way to trust and love and confidence; it was the first stepping stone to building trust, the first crack in the wall of armor that covers the human heart.

It was a morning filled with all sorts of love; good morning to be alive.

----------------

Taecyeon was sitting at the breakfast table with his father, eating quietly.

“Son? You’re awful quiet this morning, what’s bothering you?”

“I’m not sure,” he responded.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I don’t know if I should be bothered. I should be happy, but I’m not.”

“Huh? You got to give me some specifics here. I have no idea what –

“I just meant that I should be happy for her, but I’m not.”

“Her? Who might that be?”

“Jessica. I think she’s dating someone, but I can’t just let it go.”

Taecyeon sighed.

“Who is she seeing?” his father asked.

“I’m not sure, I just heard from around town that she’s seeing someone. I think her name is Yuri? Something like that.”

“Kwon? Kwon Yuri?”

“Yeah! That’s it. Do you know her?”

“Why, sure! She works in our dairy! I see her everyday.”

“She works for you?”

“Yup, sure does. Hard worker, too. Never turns down a job.”

“Listen, dad, can I ask a favor?”

“What is it?”

“Can you give her some extra shifts? Keep her busy?”

“Son, I’m not sure –

“Dad, you don’t understand, I need Jessica! I need to be with her, and as long as Yuri is there, that won’t be possible. Can you please help me? I know it might be wrong, but I’m desperate now.”

“Alright, I hope you know what you’re doing, Taec.”

“Oh, I do, dad, I sure do.”

-----------------

“Yuri!” called Mr. Ok from behind the counter of the shop.

“Yes, Mr. Ok?”

“I need your help in the factory, in the processing mill.”

“Uhhhh –

Yuri was thinking about her rounds, about her daily visit to Jessica.

“I’m not so sure,” she said.

“Please, Yuri, we’re short on hands and I really need your help. You’re the best worker I have.”

“But what about my rounds? Junho’s rounds? I cover for him –

“It’s taken care of. Junho will do your double duty. Alright?”

“But I don’t see why I can’t just do the rounds and Junho work in the mill, Mr. Ok?”

“Because, Yuri, I don’t mean to be mean, or anything, but in all honesty, your friend is not the brightest of the bunch. I’m sure you know this, Yuri. That’s where you come in. I need you, and your brains. I can trust you to work the machine and not be worried about you losing your hand, or your leg, or breaking the dang thing! It’s expensive, ya know?”

Yuri sighed, was defeated.

“Yes, I know, Mr. Ok.”

“So is that a ‘yes,’ Yuri?”

He smiled brightly as Yuri, full of expectation.

“Y-Yes, Mr. Ok, of course.”

“Oh, thank God for you, Yuri! What would I do without you? I suppose I would be stuck with Junho. 

Maybe it would be okay if he got his tongue caught in the machine or something.”

“What?”

“Nothing, Yuri, nothing. Pretend you heard nothing.”

He winked at her and left, turning on his heels. He did not know how long he could keep smiling, felt sick to his stomach.

Yuri let out another sigh behind him, and headed to drop off her bag in the storage room.

At least I had a good night, she thought to herself.

---------------

Jessica was walking through the front door when her mother called from the living room.

“Jessica? Is that you?”

“Yes, mom, it’s me. Good morning,” she replied, while walking towards the living room.

“You look happy,” her mother said.

Jessica smiled, “Of course I’m happy,” she smiled even more brightly, thinking of her night, “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I’m glad you had a good time, dear. Did you have breakfast yet?”

Jessica nodded, “Yes, I did, it was delicious.”

“That’s good to hear, dear.”

Her father walked in.

“Jessica! How was your night?”

You have no idea.

“Amazing.”

And she smiled brightly before excusing herself to her room.

Sleep; All she wanted now was to drown and sleep.

-----------------

It was late in the noon when Taecyeon was standing in front of Jessica’s house holding roses. He rang the doorbell, a little confident, a little nervous.

He rang the doorbell and shifted his feet, ruffed his hair and straightened his shirt. He was expecting to be greeted by a servant, but instead it was Jessica at the front door, looking somewhat grumpy and disgruntled.

“Oh, hello Jessica!” he said, a little too loudly.

“Oh, Taecyeon, hi. It’s nice to see you again.”

She smiled and rubbed her eyes.

“Will you come inside?”

“Yes, please,” he said, “oh, and these are for you.”

He handed her the roses.

Oh ,red roses this time? Nice try, but still, bad choice.

“Thanks,” she said, smiling lightly.

They were sitting down in the living room now, across from each other, near the fireplace.

“Can I get you anything to drink? Water? Tea?” Jessica asked.

“No, I’m fine.”

“So, what’s up?” she asked politely.

“Oh, nothing, really. I just came to visit, and you know, see how you are.”

“I see…”

“So, how are you?”

“I’m doing good,” she said, “great, actually,” she finished, thinking of the night before, and smiling.

The smile unsettled Taecyeon – there was something behind the simple suggestiveness it carried that made him uneasy; afraid of the reality that someone else was making Jessica happy.

“So, how do you like the flowers?” he asked.

“Oh, they’re beautiful, thank you so much.”

A polite smile.

“So, what sorts of things do you like doing? Any hobbies?”

Jessica shifted in her seat and sighed internally.

So it’s going to be one of those days.

Several hours later, Taecyeon finally left, after the sun had already set and Jessica missed Yuri.

Simultaneous disappointment on both sides of the same town.

----------------------

Jessica hid away in her room the next few days, pretending to be asleep whenever Taecyeon arrived, as Yuri was wasting away slowly, missing Jessica more and more by the second.

Just as the sun was setting several days later, Jessica’s servant knocked on her door lightly.

“Ms. Jessica, Mr. Taecyeon is here again. I assume you are still sleeping?”

“Yes, and thank you,” she replied from inside the room.

“Alright, goodbye miss.”

“Bye.”

----------------

Jessica was preparing to leave and visit Yuri; she had grown only quieter and quieter these past few days, more and more withdrawn, wanting to hide away from everyone but Yuri. She wanted to run into Yuri’s arms as soon as possible.

She walked downstairs and found her parents sitting, as usual, in the living room.

“Mom, dad, can I borrow the car? I need to drive in town to visit someone.”

“Sure, dear, will you be back?” her mother asked.

“Yeah, I think so. Don’t worry, I’ll stay safe,” she said, and gave them a smile – the brightest one she had in days.

“Okay Jess, have fun, okay?” her father said.

“Will do. Bye.”

----------------

Yuri’s shift was almost over. She worked the graveyard shift, and was looking forward to going home and resting; sleeping so she could escape into dreams of Jessica; she did not know how she got through the past few days without her.

Does she miss me? Is she mad at me?

She looked at the clock on the wall and closed her eyes.

5 more minutes. Get me through this, please.

And she used memories of Jessica to escape, even if only for a short while.

Yuri was shutting down the machines just as Jessica walked into the store, and went to the storage room to wait for Yuri.

Yuri entered and nearly leapt out of her skin.

“Oh my God!” she cried.

Jessica frowned.

“Is that the reaction I get after nearly one week of not seeing each other?”

“Oh, no, Jessica, I’m so happy to see you, I was just shocked. Usually there’s nobody here.”

Yuri smiled at her, trying to show her that she really was happy.

She moved down the steps and approached Jessica, who was standing next to her bag.

Jessica wrapped her arms Yuri’s neck, and said jokingly, “So, where have you been? You haven’t…found someone else and left me, have you?”

Yuri kissed her sweetly, trying to compensate for the several days of separation they had.

--------------

Taecyeon was driving home, like he did for the past few days, frustrated. He was driving past the dairy when he saw a familiar figure inside.

Jessica? What is she doing here?

He U-turned and parked a short walking distance away, and followed her into the store.

-------------

Yuri and Jessica had been locked on each other for several minutes now, growing steadily more and more intense by each lingering touch. Yuri’s hands were reaching all over Jessica, only to have them slapped away.

“Not here, Yuri,” she said, in between kisses.

“Why not?”

“Shhh…” Jessica said, and resumed kissing Yuri.

Several days of separation – that was all it took to remind them more clearly of how much they really needed each other. It was the low after the high, with both waiting to see each other for so long; drowning in emotion; so that now, the passion was moving freely, sweetly, between them.

They were lost in their movements, lost in each other, eyes closed and drowning in their self-made silence. 

They did not see Taecyeon standing in the doorway, fists clenched and blood pounding in anger.

So this is who you have chosen, Jessica. A poor farmer.

He left and sped off, thinking of all the ways to bring Jessica to him, to drag Jessica away from Yuri.

He did not know that they were already both being dragged along helplessly – by each other.

--------------------

Chapter 10

The next morning, Jessica was so euphoric that she did not even bother to hide in her room, happily awoke as soon as the sun rose – reality was so much better than any dreams she could ask for; no need for drowning, now.

“You look cheery this morning,” said Jessica’s father as she sat down at the dining table.

“I would say so,” agreed her mother.

“Oh, I just had a nice night,” and she smiled, thinking about her night.

“Will you two be going out today?” asked Jessica.

“Yes, of course, Jessica. We go out every day and invite you but you always say no,” her father chuckled, “Why? Do you want to join us today?”

“Oh, no, I just want to stay in town.”

“As usual,” said her mother, “Well, you know, the usual. Stay safe. Have fun.”

“Oh, I plan on it,” smiled Jessica.

------------

Later in the afternoon, as Jessica was just getting ready to walk to Yuri, since she had no car, the doorbell rang. It was Taecyeon, again.

He was holding flowers, again. They weren’t lilies, again.

Jessica wanted to let out a loud sigh, but held it back, opening the door wide and greeting Taecyeon.

“Hi Taec, come inside?”

“Sure thing,” he said, “How are you? Feeling better?” he continued, as they were walking inside.

“Yes, I’m feeling much better,” she said, with emphasis on the “much” and a small smirk on her face.

Taecyeon was unsettled, yet again, by the suggestiveness hidden in her words. He raised his eyebrows, but shook it off and continued to speak to Jessica was they were sitting down in the living room.

“I brought you flowers,” he said, “again.”

And he smiled – it was a smile full of hope and expectation.

“Oh, that’s sweet of you, Taecyeon. Thank you.”

“No problem, none at all. It’s my pleasure.”

“That’s sweet of you, thanks.”

“So, I was wondering,” he said, “We’ve been talking for a while now, right?”

“Yeah, we have.”

“I was also wondering…if we could hang out somewhere besides your house sometime?”

What’s wrong with my house?

“Um, what do you mean?”

“I meant, would you like to go out to dinner with me sometime?”

He was apprehensive, and on the edge of many possible emotions; her response would push him one way or the other.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Taecyeon. Thank you for the invitation, but I’m…just not interested.”

Taecyeon’s hopes and expectations were being crushed, now; anger and bitterness shining through.

“Do you mean you’re not interested, or do you have someone else?”

Jessica was caught off guard, mouth open in shock for a second before she regained her composure.

“I –“ 

She opened her mouth only to close it again.

Why should I have to hide?

She opened her mouth and spoke this time, saying, “Yes, I do. I have someone else. I’m in love with this person, and we’re dating. Does that answer your question?”

Taecyeon chuckled bitterly.

“Yeah,” he said under his breath, “It’s that milk girl.”

It was just barely audible to Jessica, and her temper rose in indignation.

“Yes. It is the milk girl. What about –

“She’s a nobody, Jessica. What can she give you? You have no future with her.”

“That’s not true. We –

“Face it, Jessica. Reality. She has nothing. Nothing to give you. There is nothing she –

Jessica snapped.

“She’s already given me everything! I’ve given her my all and she’s given me her all. That’s all I could ever want! That’s all I need.”

A hint of a blush began to play about her cheeks, and along with the suggestiveness of Jessica’s words, Taecyeon realized the depth of their relationship.

He rose, enraged.

“Well then, Jessica. Thank you for having me so kindly,” his words were sarcastic.

“You are welcome,” she replied coldly, diverting her eyes to the couch.

“I’m leaving now. Good bye,” he said.

Good riddance.

“Bye,” she huffed.

Taecyeon stormed out and closed the door behind him – Jessica had not even risen to escort him out; was still on the couch, frustrated and thinking about Taecyeon’s words, before sweeping them to the back of her mind, where she could avoid them for longer.

-------------

It was Yuri’s break time, and she was sitting next to Junho, as per her custom, listening to him.

She was smiling off into space every few seconds, and Junho was trying to bring her back to reality.

“Yuri! What is the matter with you lately? Always dozing off when I’m talking, jeez!”

“Oh, sorry Jun. Continue,” she said, smiling.

“Well, I’m done talking already. You missed it. Your loss.”

“Oh, really? Awww.”

She was still smiling.

“Hey! What – well. You seem distracted. What’s wrong? Anything happen?”

“No, nothing happened,” and Yuri laughed shyly, looking down at the floor when she spoke.

“Woah, woah, woah. What was that?”

“What was what?”

“That smirk. You smirked! You sly dog! What happened? Was it Jessica?”

“No, I have no idea what you are talking about, Jun!”

She chuckled nervously while smiling slightly, unable to suppress the thoughts of Jessica.

“Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.” Junho said, as he looked around, as if searching for people to tell.

“It was nothing,” Yuri started, “all she did was visit last night as I was working, and –

“Oh my God!” Junho exclaimed, “Are you blushing? Oh my God. You cheeks they are the color of Waldo’s shirt. This is…amazing. Wow. I never would have thought –

“Jun! Shh!!!” Yuri flailed her arms violently, not wanting him to attract the attention of the other people in the shop.

“Ha! So it’s true. You just as good as admitted it. I win. Haha. You –

In the midst of their small quarrel, a man with rage in his heart and mind was approaching the shop, was entering and watching Yuri carefully.

Yuri continued, “What are you talking about, Jun? You win? What does that have to do with –

“Oh my God, Yuri, you should really stop talking. Look at those cheeks. Oh, boy, you are just glowing today. Anything happen? Or is it the heat? Hot? Heat? Get it?”

Junho smirked and twiddled his eyebrows.

“Jun! Be quiet!” Yuri was almost yelling now, as she turned at the man walking towards her. It was the man from the party, the one who had been dancing with Jessica.

The smile slid off of her face, and the man continued to approach rapidly. He did not look happy.

Yuri rose, defensive instincts on the uptake.

“Yuri? What’s going on?” asked Junho, as he eyed the man coming closer – Junho himself was backing away in fear.

Taecyeon was several feet away from Yuri now.

“Yuri, tell me!” Junho yelled.

Everyone in the shop was watching now.

“Nothing, Junho, I have no idea!” Yuri yelled, turning to look at Junho, “Step as –

Taecyeon swung at Yuri, and she fell to the floor.

“Oh my God!” yelled Junho in fear, as Yuri stood and swung right back at Taecyeon, “Someone, do something! Please!”

Taecyeon punched Yuri several more times, bruising her almost instantly, as Yuri grunted in pain and kneed Taecyeon between the legs.

“Augh!” he yelled.

Yuri was grabbing his head, making to slam it against the counter, when several of the other workers, just returning from lunch, entered and pulled them apart.

They had to contain the two, who were still struggling in vain to reach at each other.

Yuri did not know she could be so mad at someone who she barely even knew – just the memory of his face, his hands – near Jessica – was enough to send her over the top.

“You b*tch,” said Taecyeon, “This isn’t over. Not yet. I’ll be back.”

His voice was filled with quiet rage, waiting to explode again.

“Come again. Come back. You are welcome to. See if I care.”

Yuri spat the words like venom.

“Oh, you’ll see, soon enough,” said Taecyeon.

“Don’t take your time,” said Yuri, as she rolled her eyes and dabbed at her bloody lips, and Taecyeon stormed out in frustration.

“I’m going home,” she said, “I’m going to treat these bruises. See you guys later.”

She turned and left without another word, leaving everyone else to drown in paralyzing silence.

-------------------

Chapter 11

Jessica had walked to the dairy by now, after calming down from her encounter with Taecyeon, and entered the store, looking around for Yuri.

“Junho?” she called.

He already knew what she was looking for.

“Oh, Jessica! You should have been here earlier!” he responded from the back of the store.

“Jun? Where are you? What are you talking about?”

He appeared from behind several boxes and walked up to her.

“Oh, boy, Jessica, it was intense, this big fella just walked into the store and went up to her, and socked her across the face! There was blood just gushing everywhere and –

“Her? Yuri? Blood? Wait, slow down!”

“Yeah, Yuri. Some guy went up to her and just belted her across the face, she –

“Blood? She was bleeding? Gushing?”

Jessica was getting panicked now.

“Yeah,” replied Junho, “but it wasn’t like, gushing, just, you know, several drops.”

“Who was this man?”

“Ok Taecyeon, the store manager’s son. Good looking guy, too. He was –

“Junho, please tell me where Yuri is, right now. Do you know? Is she alright?”

“She went home to treat her wounds, and I think she was fine. A little riled, but fine.”

“Thank you so much, Junho,” Jessica said, before walking quickly out of the store.

---------------

Yuri walked home, slowly, thinking about everything that had just happened, trying to let out all the anger. Her parents were gone, and she was sitting, alone, on the couch in her living room.

Her shirt was off, and she was wearing only her undergarments, trying to dab at her wounds, hissing whenever the powder and ointments stung her body.

“Ouch!” she muttered quietly, “Stupid Taecyeon.”

She groaned in frustration loudly and fell back on the couch in madness, wanting to hit something but not knowing what to do – everything in her house was too easily breakable for that. There was too much anger inside her now, too much aggression – she needed some way to let it all out.

She was trying to bandage a cut on her neck when she heard the gate open. She looked out her window and saw Jessica, walking quickly towards the door.

Jessica reached the front door and knocked lightly, saying, “Yuri? Are you in there?”

“Yes,” Yuri replied, still heated but trying now to calm herself.

“May I come in?”

“Yes.”

Jessica creaked the door open softly and made her way to Yuri on the couch, no words spoken just yet, only a prolonged stare of concern and love.

She sat down and placed a hand on Yuri’s shoulder, lightly.

“Yuri,” she almost whispered, “I know what happened, I’m sorry, so sorry. It was my fault, I –

“No, Jessica. It wasn’t your fault. Don’t say that,” and Yuri hushed her quietly.

Jessica nodded and looked over Yuri’s bare body, hands running tenderly over her skin. Jessica leaned into Yuri’s ear, hands wrapped around her shoulders lightly, and whispered, “Does it hurt, Yuri?”

“No,” said Yuri, but winced as Jessica’s fingertips ran over a bruise.

“I’m sorry,” said Jessica quietly, but she did not remove her hands.

She continued to circle Yuri’s skin with her soft touches, and moved her lips from Yuri’s ear, down her neck – to her shoulders. She kissed the bruises along the way, softly, but just enough to make Yuri wince in pain and groan in satisfaction; simultaneous.

Yuri could feel her body heating up, fire trailed along Jessica’s fingertips, Jessica’s lips – she was setting her aflame, she would burn Yuri alive – and she would enjoy every moment of it.

Jessica was still making her way all across Yuri’s body, when she pushed Yuri down on the couch, lightly, and whispered, “What about now, Yuri? Does it hurt?”

“No,” Yuri said quietly, with her eyes closed, “Not yet.”

Jessica stayed silent and continued to explore.

“How about now?” she muttered softly.

“No, nothing yet,” Yuri gasped into the air.

Jessica was completely on top of Yuri now, hands still circling as she kissed Yuri’s lips, with passion, this time – with intent to burn.

She broke away and hovered over Yuri’s face, lips still touching. Yuri’s eyes were closed, and she was beginning to moan softly.

“How does it feel, Yuri?”

Yuri only moaned below, eyes closed in frustration. 

“Tell me,” Jessica whispered more forcefully into Yuri’s ear.

“It feels like fire,” Yuri choked out, as her eyes shot open and Jessica’s hands snaked down to her waist.

Yuri let out an audible groan of surprise. Her eyes were closed and back arched as Jessica moved to accommodate every one of her needs, desires; burning them both alive – and they enjoyed every moment of it.

Hot afternoon.

------------------

Yuri was at work the next day, after her long afternoon and even longer night, humming happily to herself while Junho was eyeing her suspiciously.

“I smell something fishy!” Junho exclaimed.

Yuri looked at him and smiled.

“Well, it is shrimping season, so that could possibly be it, but –

“Oh, Yuri! Don’t play smart with me! You know what I mean! It’s those cheeks, those red, red, cheeks. I see them. You can run, but you can not hide –

“Junho, please, -

“It’s Jessica, again? Oh my God, I shudder to think of what goes on behind closed doors and –

“Don’t shudder, Jun. It isn’t cold.”

“Well, obviously, Yuri, it’s summer. It’s an expression that –

“Oh, I wasn’t talking about the weather,” said Yuri, smirking.

“Oh my God, Yul, please don’t tell me –

Junho stopped when he saw Yuri look up and clenched her jaw, expression unreadable. He followed 

Yuri’s line of vision and stopped – Taecyeon was walking towards them.

Yuri started, “What do you –

“Can we talk?” Taecyeon said, “Somewhere private? I come in peace,” and he held his hands up, in a neutral gesture.

Junho turned his back to Taecyeon and faced Yuri, mouthing, “Don’t do it, Yuri! No! No! No!”

“Sure,” replied Yuri, “How about the storage room?”

Junho was mouthing furiously, “Yul! What are you doing? Oh my God! This is –

“Yeah, that sounds good,” said Taecyeon, as he walked towards the back of the store.

Yuri tried to move past Junho, but he stopped her and whispered into her ear, “Yuri, if he tries anything, I’m going to be standing outside with a wrench, so just yell –

Yuri grabbed Junho by the shoulders, softly, and said, “Jun, calm down. Nothing will happen. Relax, please. I can take care of myself, okay?”

“O-Okay.”

She pinched his cheeks.

“Good boy. Now wait here.”

------------

“What is it?” said Yuri.

They were in the storage room, now, Taecyeon leaning against one of the cabinets and Yuri standing with her back to the wall.

“I’m just here to talk, Yuri. No need to get hostile.” 

He appeared calm.

“I’m not getting hostile, I’m just on my break. It’s timed. I don’t have the luxury of infinite time –

“It’s about Jessica.”

“Go on,” replied Yuri, though her face obviously grew darker – she was thinking of the dance Taecyeon and Jessica had; thoughts that had the power to overtake all reason in her mind.

“I’m just trying to be reasonable here, okay? Please listen.”

“Please just get to the point.”

“I want you to the leave Jessica.”

“Oh, well that’s simple,” said Yuri, smiling.

“What?” 

He looked confused.

“It’s simple. You know? Not complex.”

“I realize,” said Taecyeon through gritted teeth, “the definition, but I do not understand what you mean by it.”

“I mean that the answer is no. Plain and simple. If that’s all –

“No, it’s not all. I want to know what you think you’re doing, being with her.”

“What are you talking about?” spat Yuri.

Her patience was being tested now.

“You have nothing to give her!”

“You obviously have never been in a relationship before. Please try again when you do,” replied Yuri.

“Listen to me, Yuri,” Taecyeon said, “Think about it reasonably. Please. What can you offer her?”

Yuri breathed in and out for a while before responding.

“It’s something you can’t offer, and I think you need to understand that.”

“What are you talking about? You’re nobody!” Taecyeon cried, “You have nothing, with you she won’t have anything, no security! No nothing!”

“What is security? It’s not just material. I can give her security, too, maybe even more than you, with all your glamour and money. I can give her security in love.”

Taecyeon was struck silent as Yuri continued.

“You need to understand that love is not objective or subjective. It is uncontrollable. You can’t pick and choose who you love – it just happens. Sometimes it happens out of nowhere, by chance; sometimes it happens when you want it to, and sometimes it’s one-sided. Sometimes it doesn’t work out, but it’s love anyway. Love is very simple. It’s love. And yet the word seems difficult for you to understand. It must be very complex for you because you do not understand what it really means to be in love.”

“What?”

Taecyeon wrung his hands in frustration while Yuri continued, yet again.

“It just so happens this time around that I love Jessica – and she loves me, too. There may be many, many people out there who are in love, mutual love, but our love is special, because we only know of each other. There is no other explanation, no reasons. And there doesn’t have to be. You think you can offer her more, but what can you really offer? Things break, get stolen, you can lose them and they eventually wear out with time, but love never truly dies. It is unselfish. If she wanted to leave me, I would let her go – and if you really loved her, I think you would let her go, too.”

“You’re crazy!” said Taecyeon, “I have some things you will never have! Let her go!”

He was rambling and his brain was working on overdrive, now, not functioning properly, battling emotion with the reason he did not want to face.

“So you think that what you make, what you have, somehow makes you better than I, for Jessica?”

“Yes.”

“Well, I think it’s what you can’t make that is the most valuable.”

Taecyeon had no response to that. He was getting infuriated, now, not knowing how to react to Yuri’s short monologues.

“You have no idea what our love is like. Please just leave us alone,” said Yuri, quietly, almost silently, thinking of her love.

“Never!” Taecyeon spat, “This conversation isn’t over, not yet!”

He glared at Yuri for several seconds before turning away for the door.

“It was over before it even started,” said Yuri, quietly, into the silence, so that Taecyeon could not hear.

--------------

Taecyeon stormed through the shop, glaring down a dumbstruck Junho on the way. He made his way to his car, slammed the door, and sped home. 

He waited till the noontime, when he knew Jessica’s parents would be home, to call them.

“Hello?”

“Hello, this is Ok Taecyeon. May I speak to Mr. or Mrs. Jung?”

“This is she speaking.”

“Oh, Mrs. Jung, hello, how are you?”

“I’m doing wonderful, dear boy, what about yourself?”

“I’m doing fine, but I was wondering if I could come over sometime for a talk with you and your husband? In private?”

“Well, that’s an odd request, but you could come over right now if you wanted. Jessica is over at one her friend’s houses right now. You’ll have your privacy that way.”

“Thanks so much,” Taecyeon said, “I’ll see you soon. Good night.”

“Good night.”

He hung up the phone, was now speeding towards the Jung residence, with vengeance in his mind.

-------------

“Well, son, what would you like to talk about?”

Jessica’s father was sitting in his study; his wife in the sitting-chair near the fireplace; both looking at Taecyeon curiously.

“I’m not sure where to begin, I feel really horrible about this whole thing,” said Taecyeon, his face distorted in what was supposed to be remorse, or pain, or regret; it was hard to tell because it was not real.

“Oh, no dear, you can tell us anything, you know that!” 

Mrs. Jung smiled reassuringly at him.

“Well, it involves Jessica,” started Taecyeon.

Jessica’s parents were looking at Taecyeon anxiously now, waiting for him to speak.

He continued, “I saw something, something I’m not sure how to react to. I think you ought to know, but I don’t know if you would consider it rude, or –

“Taecyeon, dear, please tell us. We know you mean no harm. You are a wonderful young man,” said Mrs. Jung.

“I saw Jessica with another girl.”

“What?” said Jessica’s father in shock.

“Y-Yes, I was in the dairy late at night, helping my father with something, and I saw them, together, doing things that I’m not sure would be appropriate to mention.”

Jessica’s parents were silent, as Taecyeon wrung his face in his hands, smiling underneath.

After a short while, Jessica’s mother spoke.

“Well, thank you for telling us, Taecyeon.”

He looked up, expression solemn.

“I’m sorry, Mrs. Jung, if I caused any harm. I just thought you should know about your daughter. I just thought you would want to know. And I just had to tell you. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s alright, son,” said Mr. Jung.

“I think I will be leaving now, Mr. and Mrs. Jung. Thank you for having me.”

“Good night,” chimed Jessica’s parents.

And Taecyeon left, wondering if he was wreaking enough havoc to tear two lovers apart, wondering if he could do anything at all, while Jessica’s parents were left swarming in their thoughts; in the silence that follows the shock of revelation.

Nothing like silence to wash out all sound.

--------------

Chapter 12

“Well,” said Mr. Jung, looking at his wife from across the room, “That was unexpected.”

She did not respond, only opening her mouth to speak, pausing, and then closing it again.

“Let’s talk about this dear, what shall we do?” he coaxed gently.

“I don’t know,” she finally said, “My mind tells me one thing but my conscience says something else.”

“All possible solutions will have a downside,” he said, “We just need to think –

“We need to talk to Jessica,” she replied, “As soon as she comes home. We are going to wait here until she comes home and have a nice, long talk with her. We haven’t done that in a while.”

“Alright, dear. We’ll wait at home today.”

He smiled reassuringly at his wife as she returned a weak smile.

----------------

“Yuri,” said Jessica softly, hugging her from behind, “When is your break over?”

“It already ended, Jess. I really need to get back to work. I’m sorry.”

“Fine,” Jessica sighed, “I’ll visit you later, at night, alright?”

“Okay,” said Yuri, spinning around to face her, “I’ll be waiting.”

And they shared a sweet kiss, then a loving smile.

---------------

Jessica was walking home now, as the sun was beginning to set. She was walking slowly, smiling to herself and looking all around. Never before had she noticed just how beautiful the town was; the scenery was suddenly much more vivid, much more alive.

She closed her eyes and took a huge breath of air, spinning around in joy as she went along, but was caught by surprise when the sound of a speeding car approached.

She leapt to the side, just in case, as the car sped on by. She thought she recognized the driver and the car, but could not be sure – it had been moving too fast.

She shrugged off her thoughts and continued on walking home – was all smiles.

-------------

Jessica opened the door softly and said, “Mom? Dad? I’m home.”

“Jessica? Come into the sitting room, dear. Your father and I want to have a talk with you.”

“Okay,” she said, thinking nothing of the request.

She entered and sat down across from her parents, who were sitting side by side, on the couch. Jessica herself was in an armchair, sitting up politely.

“Yes?” she asked.

“Jessica,” began her father, “Your mother and I have heard some surprising news lately. I use that word with reservation because I am not sure which word to use. It concerns you. Would you happen to know what I am talking about?”

Jessica’s mind was beginning to swarm with images with Yuri, and her heart was beginning to pound in fear.

“N-No,” she stammered.

“Where were you just now?” her mother asked.

“I told you, I was with a friend.”

“A friend? Just a friend? No one special?”

“Mom, dad, I don’t know where you’re going with this, but –

Jessica had been preparing to confess when her mother cut her off.

“You are lying, Jessica,” she said sadly, “You never lied to us before.”

“No, I wasn’t going to lie, mom, I was going to tell the truth, but I need to know what you heard, first.”

Her mother said, “We heard that you were dating another girl. Is this true?”

And her mother looked at her with a look that was defeated, but still had a spark of hope left.

Her father shifted uncomfortably in his chair while Jessica prepared to speak, trying to gather all her courage and be resolved.

“Yes. It’s true.”

Her parent’s reactions had not yet changed.

“Her name is Kwon Yuri,” she continued, “I love her, and she loves me. She makes me so happy, in ways that I didn’t know were possible, in ways I could have never imagined before. It feels like something I can’t even begin to explain, but I want to tell everyone about. I know you think it’s wrong, but I am going to stand by her –

“Jessica,” her father said softly, “We know.”

“What?”

“We already know you two love each other. You’ve been so happy lately. You speak much more, you are always smiling – and that smile means the world to us, Jessica.”

Jessica was silent, in awe, as her mother picked up where her father had left off.

“Your father and I have decided, after much consideration, that it is quite alright for you to be dating Yuri. We just want you to be safe and happy. We just want you to know that as long as you are happy, Jessica, we will be, too. And we want you to tell us the truth. The whole truth, when it happens. We were shocked to find this out from someone else –

“Who?” Jessica asked.

“That is not important,” her mother continued, “What is important is the fact that you did not tell us about this earlier. Next time, trust in your parents, okay?”

Jessica smiled and nodded.

“Of course, mom, dad. I’m sorry for lying to you. I won’t do it again.”

There was a smile of sincerity, then smiles of sincerity all around.

Jessica suddenly looked out the window in shock. Night had fallen completely, and she remembered the promise she had made to Yuri.

“Mom, dad,” she began, “Can I borrow the car?”

-------------

Jessica drove off into town, trying to mind the windy road while still driving quickly. She finally reached the dairy, parked out in front, and ran inside.

Yuri was just cleaning up in the mill and looked at the clock.

Midnight, she thought to herself, Where is she?

“Yuri!” said Jessica, bursting through the door, “Sorry I’m late – I got held up.”

“It’s fine,” Yuri smiled, “I can wait a little bit,” as she shut down the last machine.

Yuri walked up to Jessica and held her hand, guiding her to the storage room.

“Let’s get my bag, okay?”

Jessica said happily, “Okay,” and smiled back at Yuri, then leaning her head on Yuri’s shoulder.

--------------

“Yuri,” said Jessica softly, running a hand over Yuri’s back, “Did you wait long for me?”

“No,” said Yuri, still organizing her bag below.

Jessica wrapped her arms around Yuri from behind and leaned into her ear, whispering, “Then we still have plenty of time, right?”

“I think so,” smirked Yuri, already knowing where the conversation would head next.

“How much time, Yuri?”

The voice was still soft, waves caressing Yuri’s ear tenderly, sending tingles across all her senses.

“I-I don’t know, Jess, I think –

Yuri stopped speaking when Jessica turned her face around and kissed her. Yuri stood up now, to accommodate Jessica more comfortably, then pushing her against the wall.

“Jess –,” Yuri began when they broke away, but Jessica only hushed her and pulled Yuri down to her once again.

“Here?” Yuri asked the next time the separated, “Really?”

“Yes, here,” said Jessica sternly, reaching for Yuri’s shirt.

Yuri looked surprised for a second, then smiled and said, “Okay,” leaning into Jessica’s neck all the while.

Jessica was reaching for Yuri’s pants when suddenly a voice yelled, “Oh my God! My eyes!”

They looked for the voice, half-clothed, and scrambled to get dressed in shock.

“Junho!” Yuri cried, “What on earth are you doing here? At this time?”

She was slipping her shirt back on.

“I’m s-sorry,” Junho began to stammer, “I-I will leave and w-wait for you, Y-Yuri. O-Outside. I have, uh, s-something to t-tell you,” he finished, covering his eyes with one hand and feeling his way along the wall with his other, trying to find the door.

Yuri and Jessica exchanged glances as they got dressed and followed Junho outside.

“What is it?” said Yuri, cheeks still slightly pink in embarrassment.

Jessica was looking at the floor, could not bear to look Junho in the eye.

Yuri looked at Junho again, noticed that he seemed unusually serious.

“What’s wrong? What is it?” she asked, yet again.

“Is it me?” Jessica started, “Do you want me to leave? Should I not –

“No,” said Junho, voice solemn, “It’s about Taecyeon.”

“What about him?” said Yuri, undeniable anger in her voice.

“He got into a car accident, Yuri, Jessica,” Junho looked at them both, while Jessica’s head snapped up. She was in shock.

“W-What?” said Jessica, “When was this? How is he?”

Yuri looked at Jessica, slightly taken aback at what sounded like too much concern in her voice.

“Just now, well, about an hour ago. He was speeding and his car spun off the road. He’s in critical condition – they moved him to the hospital in the big city next door.”

“Oh my God,” said Jessica quietly, as the image of a speeding car flashed in her mind.

Quiet night.

------------

Chapter 13

Yuri was sitting next to Junho being the counter of the shop during her lunch break, head in her hands, frustrated.

“Yul,” said Junho, “Why are you so down lately? Something happened between you and Jess?”

“Yeah,” she replied, and Junho looked surprised.

“What happened?” he said in shock.

“Nothing.”

“Yul! You just said something happened! Tell –

“Yes, something did happen. That something is nothing. That’s the problem. Nothing has happened.”

“Wha –

“I never get to see her anymore, and when I do, she’s always dozing off or worried about Taecyeon. She visits him in the hospital more than she visits me! That’s the problem! Nothing!”

“Oh, I get it. Kinda like numbers.”

“What?” ejected Yuri.

“See, zero does nothing. It’s a number, but it has no value. It’s sometimes even worse than negative numbers, because at least those do something. But zero is the most useless number of all.”

Junho was nodding and smiling to himself, eyes closed with a sense of proud achievement.

Yuri managed to laugh in amazement.

“Wow, Jun. So that’s where you’ve been hiding your brain all this time.”

“Oh, be quiet!” he said jokingly.

And they laughed together, making Yuri feel just a little better.

-----------

“Jessica,” smiled Taecyeon from the hospital bed, “You’re back. I didn’t think you’d come –

“Of course I’d come,” she said, “You’re hurt, how could I not?”

She smiled at him as he responded.

“Yuri didn’t seem to want you around me when you two visited me together, last time.”

His face wrinkled, forming a pout.

Jessica shrugged off the comment and smiled.

“How are you feeling?”

“Better, now that you’re here,” he said, and returned her smile.

She chuckled while watching the sun set through the window, tried to keep smiling.

----------------

More days passed, and Jessica was still visiting Taecyeon; Yuri still talking to Junho about her worries.

“You know,” said Junho one day during lunch, “You seem really agitated in the morning now. You were always a morning person, and now you’re just so grumpy.”

“The problem isn’t the mornings,” she said, “It’s the nights.”

“Huh?”

“Jessica doesn’t visit me anymore. She says she’s too tired from visiting Taecyeon at the hospital all day at the hospital, and it will all be over soon once he heals.”

“Oh, then that shouldn’t be a problem, you just have to wait it out.”

“No, it is a problem,” she said, “It’s a huge problem. I used to look forward to my lunch breaks in the morning, and then the nights after my lunch break. Now I have nothing to look forward to. I feel so worn out, so empty. Still, everyday, I count the seconds to my lunch break, hoping she’ll here, and then I count the seconds to the end of my night shift, hoping she’ll be here. And she never appears.”

Yuri sighed, as Junho frowned.

“I’m sorry, Yul. That sounds like a drag, if I can do anything for you, just let me know, alright?”

“Thanks, Jun. That’s sweet of you,” and she smiled sadly at him.

---------------

It was dinnertime; the time the sun was setting, when Jessica arrived home.

She was greeted by her parents, who were just starting to eat.

“Jessica! Come join us, dear.”

She smiled.

“Okay,” and headed to the dining table, exhausted.

“What’s wrong, Jessica?” her father asked as she sat down.

“Nothing, I’m just tired,” and she gave them a tired, tired smile.

She sighed audibly, and her parents continued to stare at her, eyebrows raised.

“Jessica, remember that talk we had the other day? About lying?”

“Yes, dad, I’m sorry. I’m just so stressed right now.”

“Why? You’ve done nothing wrong, and you are on vacation. There shouldn’t be any stress,” said her mother, worried.

“There are so many things….”

Her voice trailed off as her parents put their forks and knives down, waiting patiently.

She took a deep breath before continuing.

“I just, feel so guilty. I know it’s not my fault, but I feel really apologetic towards Taecyeon because I keep thinking that I’m the reason he crashed his car. Maybe I wasn’t nice enough –

“Jessica, whatever you do, don’t lie to yourself. You can’t build the relationship out of pity; you’ll just hurt him again when he heals and you go back to Yuri. Meanwhile, where has Yuri been? You don’t go to visit her anymore?” asked her mother.

“I’m scared to face her,” Jessica replied.

“What?”

“I just feel so guilty,” she said, “I feel like I can’t look her in the eyes after she knows that I’ve been visiting Taecyeon and –

“Jessica,” said her mother, “Tell her the truth.”

“Trust this lady right here,” said her father, pointing at his wife, “She knows.”

Jessica smiled.

“Thanks mom. Thanks dad. I’m really tired right now and not in the mood to eat anything, so I think I’ll just go to bed.”

“Alright honey, don’t stress yourself out.”

“Thanks,” she said, and rose to leave.

-------------

Jessica took a long, long bath, thinking over every that had happened to her recently, smiling at the thought of Yuri, and frowning at how long it had been since they had last seen each other.

I miss you, she thought to herself, sinking beneath the water and releasing the weight off her shoulders.

She was lying in her bed now, staring at the ceiling. It was long past midnight, but she still could not sleep; there was too much yearning and restlessness within to sleep.

She sighed again and again, till her body could not fight anyway, and her eyelids finally shut with much reluctance.

-------------

Yuri was awake at the crack of down the next day, already on her way to work, trying to avoid her parents by getting an early start. They were asking questions about Jessica, and Yuri felt like doing anything except thinking, much less speaking, about Jessica.

Sorry mom and dad, but now is just not the time.

I need a distraction.

She, too, sighed and again.

--------------

Yuri approached Junho as soon as her lunch break ended. Her face was serious, and it worried Junho.

“Oh my God, Yuri!” he began, “Don’t tell me, don’t tell me! She’s pregnant! That’s why she’s been hiding from you!”

Yuri rolled her eyes.

“No, Junho, that’s not it –

He flailed wildly, speaking again.

“Oh my God!” he looked at Yuri full on in the eyes, “You’re pregnant! Yuri! How could you?”

“Junho! Listen to –

He began to rant, now.

“No, Yuri, you listen to me! I don’t care if you’re pregnant. I’ll still be here. I’ll stick by you. I’ll even be the fairy godmother if you want me to. Heck! You can even name it after me, I don’t –

He stopped once he saw Yuri’s face. It was telling him to be quiet.

“I’m not pregnant, and I would hope Jessica isn’t either,” she said roughly through gritted teeth.

“Oh, thank God,” said Junho, clutching his heart, “I thought I would have to take care of it. Gosh, I don’t like kids, they cry too –

He fell silent under Yuri’s stern look.

“Listen,” she began, “You know that offer you made me a while back?”

He remained silent, looking at her curiously.

“Junho?” she asked.

He scratched his head in confusion before speaking

“Wait…so you want to name it after me?”

“Junho!” she yelled in frustration, “I was talking about you helping me if I needed anything! I wouldn’t name my baby after you anyway, I want a daughter!”

She was yelling and everyone in the store had turned to watch.

“Jeez, Yuri, I think you need some anger management pills,” he said, looking around, “you are awfully irritable lately. And sure, I don’t remember, but if you need my help then you have it.”

Yuri was breathing heavily now, trying to resist the urge to grab Junho’s head and smash it on the counter.

She closed her eyes and breathed out one final time before speaking.

“Good. Thank you,” she started slowly, “I need you to distract me. Will that be too much –”

He looked up and cut her off.

“Oh, well that’s easy.”

“Huh? What are you –

“Oh my God!” Junho yelled suddenly, “Look! There’s Jessica!” he was pointing to the other side of the store.

Yuri flipped around in surprise, didn’t see Jessica, and turned back around to face Junho.

“What are you talking about? Where is she?” she said frantically.

Junho wrung his shoulders and made some sort of motion with his hands.

“How would I know?” he said, “I’m not her.”

“Junho! What is the meaning of this?”

“You said to distract you. And I did. Very well, I might add.”

Yuri pretended to bang her head on the counter, and then turned her head upwards slowly at him.

“Junho, I was talking about a longer form of distraction,” she said with her eyes closed.

“Like memory loss? Keep banging your head on the table and I’m –

“No! Junho! I meant like interacting with other people!”

“Ohhhh,” he said, “So you want to make babies?”

“Junho!”

She placed her head on the counter and began to rock back and forth, looking like a psychopath.

“Wait!” he said, “You mean like going out and just having fun?”

She looked up, eyes rolled into the back of her head and responded, “Yes, like that.”

“Ha! You should have said something! I know a place we can go tonight. I’ll see if boss will let you off early tonight.”

Yuri was still shaking her head in amazement as Junho scampered off to find Mr. Ok.

-------------

Junho had driven Yuri somewhere out of town, refused to tell her where. It was well into the night when Junho parked. 

“Ta-da! We have arrived. This is my favorite bar to go to,” he said, “Plenty of pretty girls.”

Yuri sighed.

Well, I might as well give it a shot, she thought to herself as she walked in behind Junho.

Several uneventful hours had passed while they were sitting at the bar, Yuri ready to leave, when Junho suddenly began to whisper to Yuri furiously.

“Oh my God! Yuri! Oh my God! Remember that girl I was talking to you about? She’s right there!”

Yuri turned to look.

“Yuri!” he gasped, “Don’t look! She’s coming, oh my God! Oh my God! I’m going to die!” he said as he took a long drink from his bottle of beer.

“Is she coming?” he hissed to Yuri.

“Yup, she’s about to slip right in next to you. Try not to panic,” she said with a smirk.

A woman with shoulder-length black hair walked up next to Junho. She turned to him and smiled.

“Hey, Junho!” she said brightly.

He turned to her side slowly, away from Yuri, and gave a weak smile.

“H-Hi,” he said, and looked back down.

“Who’s your friend?” she asked, looking at Yuri.

“I’m Yuri. Nice to meet you.”

The woman looked over her more carefully, smiling, and Yuri returned the smile willingly.

“I’m Tiffany, the pleasure’s all mine.”

It was her first real smile in a while.

-------------

Chapter 14

“So you’re from around here?” asked Tiffany.

“Yeah, Junho and I grew up together. We work together at the dairy,” said Yuri.

“Y-Y-Yeah,” stuttered Junho, “D-Dairy. M-Milk.”

Tiffany giggled at Junho.

“Yes, Junho,” she said jokingly, “I am aware of that.”

“I think he’s trying to say that he likes milk,” said Yuri.

They laughed at Junho together.

“I-I need, uh, the bathroom!” said Junho suddenly.

“Yes, but the bathroom doesn’t need you,” said Yuri, smiling.

Tiffany and Yuri laughed again, with Yuri remembering how long it had been since she laughed like this.

Junho scampered off to the restroom while Yuri was still chuckling.

“Wow, he already finished the entire bottle,” said Yuri, pointing at Junho’s beer.

Tiffany nodded as she opened her mouth to speak to Yuri again, eyeing her with interest.

“So…” she began, and they talked till long past Junho had returned to the restroom, till long into the night and the bar was closing down.

“I should stop by the dairy sometime,” said Tiffany, “and you know, visit you two.” 

She smiled as her eyes curved into a rainbow shape.

How cute, thought Yuri to herself.

“Y-Y-Yes,” stuttered Junho, “Y-You d-d-defi –

“You should do that,” said Yuri, cutting him off, “You’re more than welcome to.”

“Okay,” said Tiffany, “Bye guys, I’ll see you soon,” and she turned away from them and left the bar.

Junho threw his head back in his chair and sighed.

“I’m such an idiot,” said Junho, “Such an idiot!” and he kicked the table in frustration.

The bartender looked at Junho, eyebrows raised.

“Let’s call it a night,” said Yuri, “Come on,” and they exited the bar.

What a good night, thought Yuri to herself as they were driving away.

She slept more peacefully that night than she had in a long time.

---------------

“Jessica,” Mr. Jung began, “What’s wrong?”

It was morning, and they were sitting at the breakfast table.

“Nothing, dad. Just tired,” and she smiled feebly.

Her mother let out a sigh.

“Jess, you haven’t been yourself these past days. Your father and I are so worried about you.”

“Thanks,” said Jessica, “But I’ll be fine.”

“Okay, Jess. I hope you know what you’re doing.”

---------------

Jessica was lying on her bed, staring at the ceiling. She was usually at the hospital about this time, visiting Taecyeon, but today she could not force herself to go. She was worn, exhausted, both mentally and physically. 

Her mind and body both longed for Yuri, but there was so much guilt overwhelming her she did not know if she could face Yuri anymore. She wondered if Yuri was doing alright, wondered if Yuri had locked herself in the storage room again. She chuckled at the memories – a sad smile, but a smile nonetheless. It had been too long since her last real smile.

She turned to look out her window and sighed. The sun was at its peak in the sky – it was noon. Yuri would be having her break now, she thought to herself.

And I should be with her…

She closed her eyes to dream, to remember, wondering if thoughts could cover the distance between them. She leapt up from her bed after several minutes had passed like this.

Maybe if I leave now, I can catch her at the end of her break.

---------------

“…and then I had to hold Junho back from hitting the guy, because he would have been eaten alive! The guy was huge! He was probably just under 7 feet tall, and here we have little Jun –

“Don’t lie, Yuri! I could have beaten him to a pulp and you know it! He was not that big!”

“Jun, he had to bend down to get through the doorway. That’s like two of you stacked on top of each other.”

“Shut up!” cried Junho.

“You guys are too funny!” giggled Tiffany.

She was clutching her stomach, laughing with her eyes closed and no sound coming from her mouth.

“I – can’t – breathe!” she gasped.

They were sitting along the counter of the dairy, the three of them, just chatting. It was during Junho and Yuri’s lunch break; the two had walked to the front of the store to be pleasantly surprised by Tiffany. They had been talking for almost the full hour now, and any awkwardness that might have been there earlier had completely vanished.

“Sorry if we’re boring you,” said Yuri, smiling, “You don’t have to visit if you –

“No, not at all!” said Tiffany after she managed to stop her laughter, “I love this. I think I should visit more often, actually.”

Junho was still sulking.

“..was not that big…” he was whispering incoherently to himself.

“Oh, Jun, get over it!”

“I don’t feel good,” said Junho suddenly. He was frowning.

“What? Junho, I was just kidding, you don’t have to be so sensitive!” said Yuri in concern.

“No, it’s not that,” said Junho, “I haven’t been feeling too well since last night.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, I just might be getting sick – again.”

Yuri rolled her eyes.

Again. Let’s see how long this one lasts.

“Aw, poor Junho. I hope you feel better,” said Tiffany. She flashed a smile at him.

“Uh, th-thanks.”

He began to clutch his stomach and tucked his chin into his chest.

Tiffany shot a curious look at Yuri.

“What did I do?” she mouthed.

“I don’t know,” mouthed Yuri right back.

“I think I need to go home,” said Junho, leaping up suddenly.

“What?” asked Tiffany.

“Well,” said Yuri while looking at Junho curiously, “The break is over in about one minute so thanks for visiting, Tiffany. Come back sometime, okay?”

“Y-Yeah, c-come b-back.”

He smiled nervously.

“Sure,” Tiffany said, “Thanks for the company.”

They smiled at each other before leaving.

What a nice day, thought Yuri to herself, going back to work.

She did not see Jessica standing by the doorway, watching her and Tiffany smile and laugh, then turn around and leave.

-------------

Jessica was driving back to her home, trying to reason with herself.

Maybe it was no one. Yes, that’s right, she thought, nodding to herself. 

It was just a friend. They were just laughing together. That was all. She’s allowed to talk to people other than me. That’s perfectly alright. She can have friends. 

She smiled to herself.

Pretty friends. With pretty eye smiles. And pretty faces. And nice bodies.

She clenched her teeth.

Calm down. Calm down, now. It’s fine. I’ll visit her tonight.

She stepped on the gas pedal. All thoughts of missing Yuri were being mixed in with jealousy and infuriation, all thoughts of guilt were being counteracted by thoughts of hurt; she knew she would have to confront Yuri again soon.

She sighed to herself, wanting to cry in frustration – because she did not know what else she could do. 

The scenery outside her car windows became a blur as she could think of nothing else but sleep and release.

---------------

Jessica awoke when it was night – she had gone home and dreamed of better times. Sleep was always her last escape; it never eluded her for too long. 

Her eyes shot open and she went downstairs to the living room. She looked at the grandfather clock in the main hall. It read 11:30PM.

Perfect timing.

She grabbed the car keys on her way out the door.

--------------

Yuri was humming happily to herself as she shut down the last machine and made her way to the storage room to pick up her bag. She walked through the door and stopped dead in her tracks. Jessica was leaning against the wall next to her bag, arms folded across her chest. 

“J-Jessica?” said Yuri.

She did not know whether or not to snap at her or be overjoyed that she was here at last.

“You seem happy,” said Jessica.

Snap.

“Yeah, I’m pretty happy,” spat Yuri, “I’ve been doing great lately, thanks for asking. What about you?”

Her voice was harsh and sarcastic as she made her way towards her Jessica.

“Oh, you know,” said Jessica, rolling her eyes, “Great. Like always.”

Yuri was standing directly in front of Jessica now, was staring into her eyes. If eyes were drills she would have bored holes in the walls by now.

“That sounds lovely,” she said, “How’s Taecyeon doing? Great? Like you?”

“Yeah, we’re both doing just dandy!” yelled Jessica, unfolding her arms, “Thanks for asking!”

Yuri soaked in the sight of Jessica, like she had been wanting to for too long now – but this was not how she expected their reunion to happen. She slammed her hands roughly on either side of Jessica’s head, trapping her against the wall.

“You’re welcome!” she said through gritted teeth, face just centimeters away from Jessica’s.

Jessica felt her heart begin racing – it had been too long since she was this close to Yuri. Her mind was spinning wildly, losing all sense of function. She could breathe in Yuri’s smell, the smell she had been missing for so long. Yuri’s body was less than an arm’s reach away, her lips right in front of her. 

“What are you –

Jessica had just begun to speak when Yuri cut her off – with a rough kiss, pushing her completely against the wall, sliding her upwards, hands pinned on either side of her waist. 

Jessica could not resist any longer. She wrapped her legs around Yuri’s waist and her arms around Yuri’s neck. Jessica’s hands were digging into Yuri’s hair, now, as they went on and on and on. They continued till they could no longer, finally breaking apart; they had released all the emotion they had been bottling up for so long now and it drained them of energy, of air.

Yuri released Jessica and her legs unwrapped from around Yuri’s waist, her arms unwound from around Yuri’s head.

Jessica slid onto the floor, legs weak. The blood was rushing somewhere – but not to her feet. She could not stand as she placed her arms behind her on the floor, eyes closed and tilting her head back to catch her breath.

Yuri placed one hand against the wall and one on her waist, looking down and breathing heavily. Her eyes, too, were closed.

Jessica stood up before Yuri had stabilized herself, straightening out her clothes and fixing her hair.

She approached Yuri, who was slowly regaining her air at this point, and placed a hand on her shoulder.

“Yuri,” she said softly.

Yuri turned to face her, and smiled lightly.

Jessica cupped Yuri’s face with her hands and smiled back.

“I missed you, Yuri. A lot. And I’m –

“I missed you, too,” said Yuri, arms wrapping Jessica’s waist.

“I’m sorry,” said Jessica. She could feel the tears coming, “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay –

“No,” said Jessica, crying softly, “It’s not okay. I’ve been neglecting you and I’m so sorry.”

“I’m sorry, too,” Yuri replied affectionately, “I’m sorry for ignoring you all this time.”

They smiled at each other softly as Yuri leaned in to give Jessica a soft kiss.

“I love you,” said Yuri when they broke apart.

“I love you, too, Yuri.”

Another shared, sweet smile.

What a nice night.

-----------

Chapter 16

Tiffany was fast driver, and they quickly reached Yuri’s home. The car ride had been filled with silence.

She parked the car along the side of the road and glanced at Yuri curiously.

“What’s wrong, Yuri? Something bothering you?”

Yuri nodded, but stayed silent.

“Did you have a fight with Jessica?” she asked softly.

“Yeah…”

Yuri was still looking at the floor.

“What was it about?”

“It wasn’t really a big deal,” she said, “I think it was just a simple misunderstanding.”

Yuri looked up at Tiffany and tried to smile reassuringly.

“What was it about?” said Tiffany. She could sense that Yuri did not want to yet get out of the car.

“It was…about…you.”

Yuri spoke hesitantly.

Tiffany raised her eyebrows. “Continue…” she said.

“Well, she thinks that…you like me.”

“I do like you, Yuri,” said Tiffany softly.

“I know, but she meant as in more than just friends. She thinks you’re falling for me.”

Yuri looked at Tiffany. Her face was saying, “Please tell me it’s not true.”

Tiffany turned to face Yuri, adjusting her body on the seat.

She smiled at Yuri.

“Well?” said Yuri.

Tiffany stopped smiling, leaned across the seat till her lips were right next to Yuri’s. She placed a hand on Yuri’s thigh. It began to move upwards, slowly, ever so slowly.

Yuri did not stop her hand. She did not know what to think.

Tiffany whispered almost silently in a raspy voice, “She’s right.”

With her other hand, she turned Yuri’s head to face her. She stopped for a second before closing off the short distance separating their lips.

Yuri did not stop her then. She had stopped thinking.

She did not stop Tiffany’s legs when she climbed over the seat to be completely on top of Yuri. She did not stop her when they broke apart for air, and Tiffany whispered again into her ear.

“Backseat.”

Yuri did not stop her when Tiffany when she urged her, with her body, to move to the back. She did not stop Tiffany when she reached for her shirt, her pants, did not stop her when she began to caress in ways that only Jessica had caressed her before. She did not stop her when she touched her in places where Jessica had only touched before. 

She did not stop Tiffany when she mounted her; soon after Yuri was moaning and gasping loudly in ways that only Jessica had done to her before. 

She did not stop her all night; only stopped when Tiffany was too exhausted to do anything except collapse and breathe heavily, sweating from something other than the summer heat.

Tiffany whispered into Yuri’s ear, while resting on top of her chest.

“I love you.”

Yuri stopped her then. Her eyes opened wide, when she finally realized what she had done, pushing Tiffany off suddenly and scrambling for her clothes. She got dressed in the passenger seat, with Tiffany hurt and confused in the back of the car.

“I’m sorry,” gasped Yuri, “Oh my God, Tiffany. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to do that.”

Tiffany was still silent.

Yuri ranted on and on till she left the car fully dressed, saying her goodbye to Tiffany quickly; she was still quiet, in the backseat.

Yuri ran inside and collapsed on the couch.

Oh my God, what have I done?

Outside, Tiffany began to cry in the backseat of her car, while far across town, a girl with blonde hair cried herself to sleep.

Restless night for all.

-------------

“What’s eating you, Yuri? You haven’t said a word all day.”

Junho was watching Yuri concernedly.

“I-I don’t know,” stammered Yuri, “I don’t know,” she said quietly as her voice trailed off.

She did not even remember how she managed to get dressed in the morning, did not remember how she managed to walk all the way to work without breaking down.

“Alright, Yul, if you say so.”

Even Junho could sense something was wrong today.

“Yuri,” said a voice from the entrance of the store.

Yuri turned her head, tried to smile. Jessica was standing there holding a bouquet of lilies in hand.

“Jessica,” she said softly. She could do no else.

“Can we talk? Somewhere private?”

Yuri nodded, trying to smile. She could do no else.

---------------

Jessica handed Yuri the bouquet and smiled sadly.

“Yuri,” she said, “I’m really sorry about last night. It was wrong of me not to trust you. I want you to know that I trust you, Yuri.”

Yuri could only smile, did not know the words to say.

“I have to go eat lunch with my parents today, alright? I’ll be back by the afternoon, but I’ll swing by during your night shift, okay?”

“Okay,” said Yuri softly.

Jessica smiled at Yuri lovingly and kissed her lightly on the lips. Yuri’s eyes were open the entire time.

“Good. I’ll see you then,” said Jessica.

She was still smiling as she turned to walk away, leaving a speechless Yuri in the storage room. 

Could not find the words to say.

--------------

“Yuri?” said Junho, “Are you alright? You don’t look too well.”

The sun was setting now, and Yuri was still in the factory operating the machines. Junho had just finished his rounds, was stopping by to check on Yuri.

“I don’t know, Jun. I really don’t know.”

She looked tired, exhausted.

“Maybe you should leave work early today, Yul. I don’t think you should be operating those heavy things if you are tired. I’ll talk to Mr. Ok for you, okay?”

“Thanks, Jun,” she replied, voice lifeless.

He walked away from a silent Yuri, still speechless and drowning in guilt.

---------------

Yuri was on her to Jessica’s house now, had left work early. She was trying to arrange the madness in her head, trying to breathe and think of something to say to Jessica. She was still holding the bouquet of lilies Jessica had given her earlier that day. She looked at them sadly, slowly deciding that what must be done, must be done. There was no avoiding it.

She reached the gate just as it fell dark. There was no more light now, and she saw Jessica’s figure sitting on the porch.

“Yuri?” said Jessica happily. She had been getting up to go inside; what was in the dark for her?

Yuri did not speak, did not want to exhaust her words until she reached Jessica. There was only so much she could bear to say now. She could feel the guilt rushing through her; it would drown her, overwhelm her. She needed to let it out soon.

Jessica waited until Yuri reached her porch and smiled.

“What are doing here? Miss me too much?”

She laughed happily as Yuri felt her heart start to fragment. Jessica continued laughing as she looked at Yuri, but it was dark now and there was something unknown, unreadable in her face. Jessica tried to shake off all thoughts of uncertainty, tried to keep smiling though she was unnerved.

“What’s wrong, Yuri?”

Yuri was preparing to respond, needed to release what she was holding within. Guilt would consume her; she would surely hurt herself if she kept it in too long, but knew that letting it out would hurt Jessica. She did not know which one hurt more – knowing she hurt Jessica or the pain she was feeling now. She could feel it coming, needed to speak. 

“I-

Jessica was eyeing the lilies, now.

“Is it the flowers? Something wrong with them? Here, let me see,” she said, as she took the flowers from Yuri’s hand and was trying to inspect them; she found that it was too dark to do so.

You can not stop the rush, Jessica.

“Let’s go inside, Yuri. Let’s talk inside.”

She turned away, but Yuri grabbed her wrist, more harshly than she had ever before. Jessica was shocked but still managed to ask, “What is it, Yuri?”

She did not know that the harshness was due to uncertainty – Yuri did not know how else to respond. She did not want to be in the light, by the fire so Jessica could see openly all her shame and guilt. She did not want to be so exposed, was too ashamed to go anywhere near brightness.

“No, Jessica. Let’s just talk here. Right now.”

She let go of Jessica’s wrist as Jessica continued to smile.

“Okay,” she said.

Jessica’s smile was scared now – there was something in Yuri’s voice, some emotion she had never felt from Yuri before. The smile shook all emotion in her core – what was it now that could break her? Jessica thought that the worst was already over, did not want to be broken again. She had healed too recently to be hurt again; she had too much hope for Yuri and her to think of being hurt again. She nearly cringed when Yuri began to speak. She, too, could feel it coming, though she did not know what it was. It was rushing from Yuri now – there was no stopping it.

“Last night, Jessica. Do you know how I got home?”

Yuri’s eyes shone with hurt, but there was no light so Jessica could not see. This was why Yuri needed the darkness.

“You walked, right Yuri? It’s not a big deal, let’s not bring it up –

“I didn’t walk all the way home, Jessica.”

“Okay, so you got a ride from someone? A friend? That’s fine, Yuri. What does that have to do –

“I got a ride with Tiffany, Jess.”

Yuri looked tried to look Jessica in the eyes now, could barely manage to lift her head that far.

Jessica swallowed the lump in her throat and forced out a smile. She could barely see Yuri, only could feel her voice, only could feel the fear and creeping sense of unknown. But she already knew, already knew something was coming.

“That’s fine, Yuri. Like I said, I trust you. Don’t let it bother –

“We had sex, Jessica. She drove me home and I told you her that you thought she liked me. She told me you were right.”

Jessica had stopped breathing, needed to catch her heartbeat. She felt her heart drop from the clouds to the ground, could feel her world crashing around her. She had felt this before, did not want to feel it again; she wanted to pick her world up any way she could – but only Yuri could do that for her now.

“And then what happened?” said Jessica, trying to stay calm. 

She was still holding the bouquet of lilies.

“She touched me. And then she kissed me. And then – it all happened too quickly, Jess, I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry.”

The rush came, overwhelming them both. It was too much – it could crash worlds and break all in its path.

“But why, Yuri? Why did you do it?”

Jessica was desperate now.

Pick me up, Yuri. Please help me up. Don’t do this again.

Yuri stopped for a second before responding.

“I don’t know, Jess,” she said softly, “I don’t know…” she repeated it until her voice trailed off into the silence.

Jessica dropped the bouquet on the stairs of the porch.

“Jessica?” said Yuri pleadingly.

“I just need to be alone,” choked out Jessica, “I just need some time alone.”

Her voice, too, trailed off into the silence as she turned away from Yuri and walked inside.

Yuri could feel the tears start to come as she stared at the door, then at the lilies on the floor.

They had not yet been trampled on, were only lying there sadly. It was dark. No more color – nothingness.

Yuri stared back at the door, longing for the person who had given them to her, but she was already long, long gone. 

The land fell quiet as Yuri turned to walk away, leaving tears and the lilies on the stairs of the porch.

No more words to say – nothing like silence to wash out all sound.

--------------

Chapter 17

One day had passed, and Jessica had locked herself in her room. She did not leave, not even to eat. Her parents thought it would only be several days.

“Give it time, dear,” said her father to her mother when she wanted to talk to Jessica, “Give it time. She’ll be up and about in no time.”

So they let Jessica rot quietly away – in no time at all.

Two days had passed, and Jessica still was not eating. She was locked in her room, only left to walk for several minutes, to try and breathe before returning to her solitude. She could not do anything but think about Yuri’s betrayal. She tried to reason with herself, over and over, that maybe there was some justification for Yuri’s actions – but every time she did she would come up empty handed.

She said it herself. “I don’t know.” She didn’t know why. There was no reason.

And every time she tried to reason with herself, she was hurt all over again – joy and pain often spring from the same source.

-------------

“I need some time off, Mr. Ok.”

“What, Yuri?”

Yuri sighed.

How do I explain?

“I…haven’t been feeling too well, Mr. Ok. There’s just a lot of things on my mind, lots of things I need to deal with, and I don’t think I can handle work too well right now. I don’t want to let you down,” she said.

“Yuri, you haven’t let anyone down. Don’t worry, take all the time you need. Your job will be waiting when you’re ready.”

“Alright, thanks Mr. Ok.”

She smiled weakly as he patted her on the back.

“You’ll be okay, Yuri?”

She continued to hold her smile in place – did not know what to say. She could do no else.

--------------

“Are you alright?” said Taecyeon, “You don’t seem too well.”

It had been several days now, and Jessica decided it was time to at least try to move on with her life. It was no use to wallow in pity, she thought to herself – but whatever she did, though she tried, she could not hide it.

Her parents were overjoyed.

“I told you,” her father had said to her mother, “I told you she would pick herself up.”

“You were right, dear,” responded her mother, “She’s going to get better on her own. Strong girl.”

They were trying to ignore the shield that covered Jessica now, the defenses covering her eyes and the guarded smile that had returned.

“Give it time,” they said, “Just give it time. Time will heal all wounds.”

So they continued let Jessica rot away quietly – but they did not know.

“I’m fine,” Jessica responded to Taecyeon. She smiled weakly.

He sat up on the bed and frowned.

“No, you’re not fine,” he said, “I can see –

“Just worry about getting better, Taec, please? Then we’ll talk later.”

“Jess! I’m almost all healed. It was just some little fractures and the doctors said I’m as strong as a bull so I’m doing just fine. I’ll be out in a few days, you know this! Now please, tell me what’s wrong. I want to help you, like you’ve helped me. I’ve never seen you so down before.”

“I’m not sure if I should –

“Jess! Just say it, please. I’m here to listen. Now, please tell me.”

Jessica sighed. She had not yet told anyone about what had happened between herself and Yuri, did not know if it was too soon to let it all out. She did not want to break down in front of anyone.

I want to be strong. I don’t want to be broken

But Taecyeon would not stop. He persisted for a while, and he began to throw questions at her.

“If you’re not ready to start, how about I ask? I’ll ask questions till I find out what’s wrong, okay?”

She nodded in defeat. Could do no else.

He guessed correctly right away. He knew there were only several people that could affect Jessica like that – he had paid attention to her smile, her eyes.

“Is it Yuri?”

She nodded, felt the tears begin to come. She had been holding back as long as she could; now the mere mention of Yuri’s name would set the wounds running.

“Jess. Did she hurt you? Jessica? Answer me, please.”

Jessica began to cry silently, could do no else. Taecyeon leapt off the bed swept her into his arms. She cried willingly now, freely, like she needed to. She threw herself into his embrace, and wept for several minutes before he spoke again. Taecyeon only patted her back reassuringly, gave her his shoulder to lean on.

“Did she break up with you, Jessica?”

“N-No,” she choked out.

“Did you break up with her?” he said into ear.

“N-No, that’s n-not it.”

He held her away from him now, hands still on her shoulders but staring into her eyes. He wondered if he would be able to see the truth behind her defenses.

“Then what?” he asked, “How did she hurt you?”

He hated seeing Jessica crying, was trying to contain his anger now.

“I’m sorry,” she said, “I can’t talk anymore.”

“Okay,” he said, “I’m sorry.”

She left the hospital that day and did not come back to see him.

-------------

“Junho!”

“Oh my God, Taecyeon. What are you doing here? I haven’t done anything!”

“I know you haven’t done anything. I just want to ask you some questions. And I want answers.”

He looked threatening. Junho swallowed the lump in his throat.

“Wait, you’re healed already? That was quick.”

“The car took most of the damage for me. Now let’s talk.”

“O-Okay.”

They were in the storage room now, Taecyeon standing with his arms folded across his chest and staring Junho down.

“What happened between Jessica and Yuri? What did Yuri do to her?”

“I-I don’t know if I sh-should t-tell –

“Dammit, Junho! Tell me, now. I’m not going to do anything to you! I just need to know!”

“Y-Yuri, uh, sh-she, –

“She what?”

“She cheated on Jessica!” spat Junho out quickly. He covered his mouth after in shock, as if refusing to say anything more.

“What? With who?”

“Some girl!” said Junho, and he covered his mouth quickly again.

Taecyeon’s face contorted in rage. He clenched his fist, turned to the nearest wall and threw a punch.

“Y-You said you wouldn’t do a-anything!”

“To you. I won’t do anything to you, Junho,” said Taecyeon through gritted teeth. He turned and left the storage room, leaving a stupefied Junho behind him.

------------

Yuri was standing in the stable, grooming one of her father’s horses. As usual, her parents were working in a city far away. She rarely saw them, wondered how badly the load would bear down upon them.

She had been grooming absentmindedly for nearly an hour now, not knowing what she was doing and only thinking of memories she had in the stable with Jessica. Even those could not make her smile now.

She heard footsteps coming, but did not bother turning to look. She was too lifeless to bother with anything, now.

“Yuri!” yelled a voice.

She turned her head now, and saw Taecyeon storming towards her. He had driven in all the way from the dairy as soon as Junho told him what had happened. He had rage in his eyes and in his heart.

“Hello, Taecyeon,” she said lightly, “I see you’ve –

He reached her and punched her across the face. Yuri fell to the floor, bleeding, but did not bother getting up. She held her lip and glanced at the blood as Taecyeon climbed on top of her and punched her again. She closed her eyes – but did not bother fighting back.

“How dare you!” he said in between punches, “You hurt her! You b*tch!”

She closed her eyes as the blood began to run from her face – did not bother to dab at the wounds.

She could do no else.

Taecyeon eventually stopped after several more blows and stood up, confused. He was enraged, but had expected Yuri to fight back. He had wanted a fight, but did not get one. There was nothing for him here, he realized, no life, no nothing.

“Stay away from her,” he breathed heavily, before turning away and walking out of the stable.

Yuri was still lying on the floor, bleeding and crying, from two different sources of pain.

She sobbed silently for a while, could taste the tears and blood mingling together in her mouth but did not bother getting up. She could do no else.

--------------

Junho came to visit her the next day. He had realized what Taecyeon was planning to do, but did not know how to stop it.

“Yuri, oh my God, Yuri! What happened?”

She was sitting on the couch now, thinking of the last time she had been tending her wounds.

“Hi, Junho,” she said. She smiled softly at him.

“Yuri! Was it Taecyeon? Are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” she responded in a quiet voice.

“Yuri! Tell me everything, please. I’m so –

“Junho,” she said softly, ever so softly, “Please. Just leave me be, okay? I just need to be alone.”

Junho was speechless. He did not know whether to be hurt for himself or for Yuri. This was a level of defeat and pain yet unbeknownst to him.

“Wha –

“Please leave, Jun. Thank you for coming, but I really need to be alone.”

Her voice was so quiet it could barely be heard, but even Junho could feel the pain in it now – it rung in every word.

“A-Alright,” he stuttered, “I’ll leave.”

He turned on his heels and left, worried, as Yuri continued to tend to her wounds and reminisce silently of the last time she had been tending her wounds – for Jessica, always for Jessica.

She could do no else.

-------------- 

“Junho!”

“Oh my God, what now?”

Junho spun around to find Tiffany looking at him. They were in the store and it was the day after he had been shunned by Yuri.

“Oh, Tiffany!” he said.

“Hi, Junho,” she smiled quickly.

“Wh-What’s up?”

“Where’s Yuri?” she said, looking around the store.

“She’s at home,” he blurted out. He covered his mouth quickly.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“She’s not feeling too well,” he blurted out again, behind his hands.

It was twice he had divulged information. Twice would he place Yuri in harm’s way.

“Okay,” said Tiffany quickly, “Thanks.”

Junho sighed to himself as she left.

I hope she’s not the violent type, thought Junho to himself.

-------------

Yuri was sleeping on the couch when Tiffany entered her house. Yuri opened her eyes in resignation and looked at her. She was the last person Yuri wanted to see at the moment – could feel all her resentment directed towards her, but she still did not care enough to kick her out just yet.

“Say what you have to, and then leave,” said Yuri, closing her eyes again.

“What’s wrong, Yul? What’s –

“Please don’t call me that. Yul. She calls me that. You have no right.”

Her tone was still dead.

“Fine,” said Tiffany. She could feel her annoyance and anger and jealousy start to build.

“What happened to you, Yuri?” Tiffany placed a heavy emphasis on the way she pronounced her name. It was a mocking tone, almost.

“Nothing you can fix,” said Yuri softly, “Now if that’s all you have to say then please leave.”

“What is wrong with you, Yuri? What is wrong with you?” Tiffany cried.

Tiffany continued on as Yuri opened her eyes and looked at her, still standing in the doorway in indignation.

“I love you, Yuri! Why can’t you see that? I gave myself to you! I gave it all to you and now you are treating me like this!”

“I’m sorry, Tiffany,” said Yuri. She sat upright on the couch now.

“But I don’t love you,” Yuri continued, “I love Jessica.”

Her voice was so soft, ever so soft.

Tiffany longed for Yuri to say her name like that, with that name softness and tenderness.

“Why do you love her?” screeched Tiffany in frustration, “What does she have that I don’t?”

Tiffany was beginning to cry.

“She has my heart. You don’t.”

Tiffany sobbed more heavily now. There was rage in her heart. She straightened out her smile as her eyes narrowed. She smiled a bitter, sad smile.

“What?” asked Yuri.

“Only for the summer, dear.”

And Tiffany laughed spitefully to herself and turned away.

“Bye, Yuri,” she said without looking back.

Yuri was speechless as the realization of Tiffany’s words hit her. She breathed heavily on the couch, heart racing at the possibility of all her fears and worries approaching her more quickly than she had expected. She closed her eyes and fell silent, ever so silent.

She could do no else.

----------------

Chapter 18

“I’m going to make you lunch, alright?”

Yuri nodded. She was still lying on the couch, lifeless.

“Are you feeling any better, Yuri?”

“No.”

Tiffany sighed.

“What do you want to eat? Sandwich? Salad?”

“Anything is fine,” sighed Yuri.

Yuri did feel better, just a little bit. It still hurt, but it helped to have someone around, someone who would put up with her moods, with her pain. Tiffany was there almost all day, every day, to talk her through things, cook for her, and help her on the path to recovery.

She closed her eyes, until she heard a tray being put down on the table.

“Here you go, Yuri. Lunch. Enjoy.”

Tiffany smiled brightly at her, and Yuri tried to return the smile lightly. She wanted to heal as quickly as possible but didn’t know where to start.

Maybe that’s why Tiffany is here, she thought to herself, to nudge me in the right direction.

Tiffany was eating a sandwich of her own, across the table from Yuri. She did not seem to mind the silence as she chewed away quietly.

It would be like this for another few days, until Yuri finally began to talk to Tiffany – about everything but Jessica. She did not know if she could ever really start talking about the hurt she was enduring, unless it was a confession to Jessica directly. Soon enough, Yuri was helping Tiffany with the cooking, was smiling again, and didn’t sit on the couch all day.

It was lunch and Yuri was talking to Tiffany about her plans for the week.

“I think I want to start working again,” said Yuri.

“Really, Yuri? That’s great. You shouldn’t just hole yourself up in one place forever. That’s really unhealthy. I’m glad you’re going back to work.”

“Yeah,” agreed Yuri, “But will you visit me? I’m going to miss these talks we’ve been having.”

“Of course,” smiled Tiffany, “Of course I’ll visit. I’ll visit you everyday.”

They smiled at each other brightly.

-----------

“Yuri!” squealed Junho when he saw her walking through the door of the dairy the next day.

“Why didn’t you call?” he yelled as he pulled her into a bear hug, trying to squeeze the life out of her.

“J-Junho!”

“Oh, right. Sorry.” He released Yuri as she began hyperventilating.

She took a few moments to gather her air before speaking.

“I wanted to surprise you,” she said softly, “How have you been?”

“Oh man, Yuri! I’ve been so bored around here. There’s no one to talk to!”

Yuri looked around the dairy, which was filled with workers all sitting in groups. They did not miss Yuri like Junho had missed her, only greeted her with cordial nods. She looked back and Junho and raised her eyebrows.

“I mean – there’s no one who listens!” he said while throwing his arms into the air.

Yuri laughed out loud. “Oh, Junho, you have no idea how much I’ve missed you! Tell me everything!”

Junho smiled brightly and said, “I’ve missed you, too, Yuri. You and your ears.”

Yuri frowned.

“Just kidding!” said Junho, “I really did miss you.”

“Yuri!” said a voice from deeper within the store.

It was Mr. Ok.

“You’re back, you little devil. Why didn’t you call?”

“I wanted to surprise everyone,” she said.

“Well, we found a new worker, so you can have your job back, but only you can’t work as much. You get off in the evening, is that alright?”

“That would be lovely,” said Yuri, nearly exploding from excitement.

“Great!” said Mr. Ok, patting Yuri on the back. “You have the same duties in the factory as before! Welcome back. Now I have some papers to finish up, so if you’ll excuse me…”

He laughed cheerily and turned to go back into the store.

“Yes!” said Yuri, punching a fist into the air, “I hated those midnight shifts anyway. The only good part was –

She stopped talking when she remembered her nightly visitor.

“Are you alright, Yuri? What is it?” asked Junho.

“Nothing, Jun. Now tell me everything I’ve been missing out on.”

And Junho blabbered on and on until it was time to go to work. It had been too long since Yuri had laughed like she did that morning, though she knew that her wounds still had not been healed properly.

-------------

A very similar situation had occurred on the opposite side of the town, where a heartbroken girl was saved by a friend, only this time the friend was a man and not a woman. 

Jessica, too, was beginning to heal, also by completely avoiding all thoughts of Yuri. Taecyeon had been seeing her every day, buying food for her and driving her around so she could get out of her manor.

“Where do you want to go today?” asked Taecyeon.

It was evening time, just around dinner.

“I don’t really care,” she said, “Anywhere.”

“Alright, you’re gonna have to pick a place today, Jess. Come on. Make a choice!”

He nudged her playfully.

“Fine,” she said, smiling lightly, “I want to go into town.” 

------------

Junho, Tiffany, and Yuri were standing around the counter of the dairy as the sun was setting and they were preparing to leave.

“Well, thanks for all the support guys, I think I’m gonna go home now. Can one of you guys give me a –

“Wait. That’s it?” asked Junho.

“What?” responded Yuri.

“Yeah, seriously,” said Tiffany, nodding in agreement with Junho.

“I have no idea what you guys are –

“It’s your first day back, Yul! We gotta celebrate. We’re not just gonna let you go home. ‘Tis a joyous day. We must go out. Have fun. Party!” Junho was jumping around in anticipation now.

“Oh, no you don’t!” said Yuri, “I am not going back to that bar, ever. I don’t think the bartender likes me anyway.”

Junho stopped and looked at her in shock.

“Well where can we go if –

“We don’t have to go to the bar, silly,” said Tiffany, “We can go into town. It’s a nice night. Let’s just walk around town until we get hungry, and then go grab something to eat. That should be okay, right?”

Yuri smiled.

“Sounds good!” she said excitedly.

-------------

“Are you full?” asked Taecyeon, “You haven’t touched your food yet.”

“I’m fine,” said Jessica, “Just not hungry. Do you want it? You look like a starving beast,” she teased.

“Actually, that’s why I was asking,” joked Taecyeon as he grabbed her plate of shrimp.

“Oh my goodness!” squealed Jessica while giggling.

“Chew with your mouth closed!” she said to him when he began to wolf down the food.

“Buhh I’mm uh –

“Oh, ew! Don’t talk, just chew. Without opening you mouth!”

Taecyeon grinned while Jessica laughed from across the table.

“You know,” she said jokingly, “You actually aren’t that bad, even if you can’t eat properly.”

Taecyeon swallowed his food and smiled at her.

“Thanks, you’re surprisingly not too horrible either!”

“What is that supposed to mean?” she cried in indignation.

“I’m kidding!” he said as they began to laugh together.

“Alright,” said Taecyeon, “Where do you want to go now?”

“Let’s just walk around town. I’m in the mood for that.”

“Okay,” he said as they stood up.

------------

“Oh man,” said Yuri, “I’ve forgotten that half of these stores even existed. It’s been a long time.”

“Oh, right!” said Junho, “Because you were in the factories and I had to take all of your routes. And you lied, by the way. No one wanted to listen to me anyway –

“I wonder why that might be,” said Yuri jokingly.

“Oh, hush! You were the one begging me this morning to talk to you!”

“Begging?” cried Yuri indignantly. “Do not misuse my kindness, Jun!” 

“What are you talking –

“You guys, people are staring,” said Tiffany, who was giggling to herself.

“Oh, right,” said Junho.

“Is anyone hungry yet?” asked Tiffany.

“I’m kinda hungry,” said Yuri.

“Then let’s go eat,” said Tiffany, “I know this great seafood place that serves the best shrimp, just around the block.”

“Yeah, we know it, too, Ms. Tiffany,” said Junho playfully, “We live here, remember?”

“Oh be quiet,” she said as they started to walk towards the restaurant.

They turned the corner just as Taecyeon and Jessica were turning as well, nearly bumping into each other. 

“Ah!” yelled Yuri in surprise. She froze once she saw Jessica. The blockade that she had been building up was shattered, broken by just one look from Jessica. It was hard to contain the rush she felt, now.

“Hi, Yuri,” said Jessica, trying to be calm though the same was happening for her. She looked over and Junho and Tiffany and smiled politely.

“H-Hi,” stammered Junho, looking nervously from Jessica to Taecyeon, whose expression was looking worried.

“Hello, you two,” said Tiffany politely.

There was a long, awkward pause, as Yuri tried to avert Jessica’s eyes.

“How are you?” asked Yuri.

Now I’m horrible.

“I’m fine,” said Jessica softly, “you?”

Not okay.

“Same,” said Yuri, swallowing the lump in her throat.

Jessica glanced over quickly at Tiffany, and her mind began to jump to conclusions; she did not know how much longer she could look at her. Yuri looked at Taecyeon and wondered if Jessica had moved on, began to grow more and more fearful.

There was another long pause as Junho, Taecyeon, and Tiffany looked on awkwardly until Yuri finally spoke.

“Well, I guess we’ll be going now,” said Yuri, clearing her throat.

They exchanged their goodbyes as the two passed each other.

“Are you alright?” asked Tiffany once they were at the restaurant, “Do you need to go home?”

Junho was only looking at her worriedly.

“Yeah, I think I need to go home,” said Yuri.

“Okay,” said Junho and Tiffany in unison. They began to head towards Tiffany’s car as Yuri tried to think of anything but Jessica.

“Let’s get you home,” said Taecyeon.

They were around the corner now, walking towards Taecyeon’s car.

Jessica only nodded and continued walking. The silence unsettled Taecyeon as he tried to push aside thoughts that he was only Jessica’s friend, and would always be nothing more. The encounter reminded him this, though he did not want it to. He sighed as they drove off, and Jessica could feel her walls crumbling around her.

--------------

Yuri got home that night and collapsed on the couch, wanting to fall asleep but knowing that she would not be getting any that night. There was too much on her mind for her to sleep – and it was all Jessica. Jessica consumed her thoughts like she once had, like she did when they first met. Never before had Yuri felt so weak. She had been so sure that she was almost alright, but in just a few seconds her world was set off balance, with a short, simple look.

I wonder what would have happened, she thought, If she had just smiled at me. Would I be smiling? Or crying?

Yuri sighed to herself as she imagined all the things that could have happened instead of what actually happened. The blockade was being completely overrun by possibility and memories.

On the other side of the town, an equally restless Jessica longed for the same, both missing each other, both hurting, but not knowing what to say or do.

It was another restless night, the first in a string of many restless nights to come, defenses breaking and the waters rushing in. 

It would consume them both.

-------------

Chapter 19

“I left breakfast on the kitchen counter, okay, Yuri dear?”

Her mother was looking at her, lying on the couch with her eyes wide open and staring at the ceiling.

“Alright,” she mumbled.

Her mother sighed before leaving. She had awoken early in the morning like she always did to go to work and found Yuri lying on the couch. She looked like she had not slept all night.

Yuri continued to lay there for a while, until felt her stomach growl and she decided to get up. She grabbed the plate of eggs and headed back to the couch, plopping down and eating the food lifelessly, when suddenly the door opened.

It was Tiffany.

“Hi, Tiffany,” said Yuri, and she continued eating. She wanted to maintain her composure.

“Hey, Yuri. I see you got food. You cook it yourself or –

“My mother made it for me before she left,” Yuri responded in between one of her bites.

“How are you feeling?” asked Tiffany, “You look surprisingly well.”

“I feel like I want to die,” said Yuri calmly.

Tiffany sat down on the next to Yuri and said, “Oh my goodness, please don’t say things like that.”

“Why not? It’s the truth.” She was trying to remain nonchalant but knew she could not keep up the façade forever.

“But why, Yuri? Why? Jessica?”

“Yes!” snapped Yuri.

Tiffany took a deep breath before speaking.

“Okay,” she said, trying to smile, “Do you want to talk about it?”

Yuri was about to let all emotions run free as Tiffany prepared herself for the worst, prepared to be hurt because she wanted to hear how much Yuri loved her and not Jessica – but she knew that would never happen – no chance any longer.

-----------

Jessica was eating breakfast at the table with her parents silently. She was determined to not show them how much she was hurting.

“Jessi, your father and I are going out of town today to do some last minute sightseeing. Do you want to come with us?” asked her mother.

“I’m fine, thanks.”

She gave them a small smile.

“Okay, dear. You look tired. You should get some rest and then start cleaning up your room and packing,” said her father.

“Wait, what?”

“Oh, honey, you forgot again!” laughed her mother, “We’re leaving in 3 days. The summer break is ending! Time to get back to New York.”

Jessica nearly dropped her spoon as she looked up in shock.

“What’s wrong, Jess?” asked her father.

She smiled weakly and replied, “Nothing, just surprised that it’s so soon.”

“Oh, good,” said her mother, “3 days should be enough, right? Even for you.”

Her parents chuckled.

“Yeah, I hope so,” she said as her voice trailed off.

After breakfast she excused herself and went into her room to cry where no one could see, hoping, praying, wishing that 3 days were indeed long enough.

------------

“I can’t believe I hurt her,” said Yuri, “I don’t want to hurt her anymore, and it hurts me to hurt her. I don’t want to cause her any more pain.”

Tiffany stayed quiet as Yuri continued on. She had been pouring out all her emotions for several hours now, and Tiffany had not heard her name once yet.

She never even talks about me, thought Tiffany to herself.

But Tiffany only smiled lightly and continued to listen, until it was lunchtime and she cooked something for Yuri.

“I’m not hungry,” Yuri responded, “I have no appetite.”

“Do you want to keep talking?” asked Tiffany.

A part of her wanted Yuri to say no. Tiffany wanted to help Yuri, but with every word she spoke, Tiffany was reminded of how Yuri’s heart never belonged to her. And so she cringed when Yuri nodded, tried to steel her heart and listen to all it was that she did not want to hear.

Tiffany left late that day, after the sun had already set.

“Bye, Tiffany. Thanks so much for listening,” said Yuri.

“No problem,” said Tiffany with her back to Yuri. 

She had a sad smile on her face, and her tears fell on the porch and down the steps on her way out, but Yuri did not know, could only see Yuri’s back.

Yuri went to sleep that night thinking of all she wanted to say, while Tiffany sped off while trying not to think of all Yuri had said.

---------------

Jessica was packing her clothes lifelessly, cleaning out her wardrobe and tossing the clothes into her luggage. She looked at each line and ring of fabric on the clothes – anything to distract her. Jessica even began to clean because she did not know what else to do, made her bed and then started to look through the drawers. She was throwing things away, moving from one drawer to the next, when she pulled open the final one and stopped. Inside of it was a crushed bouquet of lilies, broken and battered. 

They had long wilted, had been hiding too long from the light of day. She was reminded once again that summer was coming to an end.

Summer flowers, thought Jessica to herself, Lilies are summer flowers.

Jessica wanted another bouquet, another promise before she would leave. She sighed as she tossed the bouquet of wilted lilies away, then lay on her bed and closed her eyes, soon falling asleep.

-------------

Another day passed, and Yuri was still lying on the couch spilling her heart out to Tiffany, who was sitting on the other side of the couch. It was nighttime now and Tiffany would have to be leaving soon.

“…And now I don’t know what to do,” Yuri said, “I don’t know what I can do to bring her back. What if she moved on to Taecyeon now? Why was he there with her?”

“Probably just as friends, as mental support, you know? Like you and I.”

Tiffany was very quiet, though Yuri did not notice. Her smile did not turn up quite as much and her voice was oddly soft.

“Oh no!” yelled Yuri suddenly, sitting straight up on the couch.

“What is it?”

“What if Jess thinks I moved on with you?” Yuri exclaimed.

She did not know that it was the perfectly wrong thing to say at the moment.

“What if Jess thinks –

“Yuri!” yelled Tiffany, “Stop it! Please! Just stop it!”

“What are you talking a –

Tiffany leaned across the couch and cupped Yuri’s face into her hands before kissing her.

Yuri did not react, did not even close her eyes. Tiffany pulled away soon after, and with teary eyes said, “Why? I love you, Yuri. Why can’t you see that? I’m still in love with you. I don’t want you to talk about Jessica anymore. I love you, Yuri.”

Yuri stayed silent as Tiffany continued to stare at her and plead with her sad, sad eyes.

“Yuri! Please say something,” said Tiffany as the tears began to fall.

Yuri was lost in thought. She wanted to stop hurting Tiffany, realized what she had been doing all along. She wished she could tell Tiffany “I love you, too,” so that she could end her hurting, even if only a little bit, but she realized that she could not. It would be Jessica and only Jessica until the end.

“Yuri,” choked Tiffany through sobs, “You have nothing to say?”

“No,” said Yuri softly, “I’m sorry.”

“Goodbye then, Yuri.”

Tiffany stood up to leave. When she was gone, Yuri knew that she could run no longer from what was plaguing her thoughts every second of the day. She knew it would always be, no matter what she did. 

The clash was inevitable.

-------------

Jessica was finishing up the packing process now, zipping up her last piece of luggage. Jessica lifted it so it was standing upright and looked around the room to make sure there was nothing she was forgetting. 

Her parents were out for dinner and Jessica had politely declined, so now that the maids had been dismissed, she was all alone in the enormous manner. She walked to her window and looked outside. The sun was setting, a pale red sunset today.

She looked down at the path heading to her home and saw a familiar figure entering the gate. Her heart skipped a beat before she bolted downstairs and waited in the hallway for a forthcoming knock on the door.

The last bouquet.

There was a knock on her door, and Jessica, too, knew that she could not run forever. She opened the door and smiled lightly.

“Hi, Jessica,” said Yuri.

She was holding a bouquet of white lilies.

“Hi, will you come in?”

“Yes, please. Thank you.”

They were sitting in the living room now as Yuri was looking around. She already knew the answer to her question before she asked it, but a small spark of hope compelled her to ask it anyway.

“Why is everything covered in white sheets?”

“I’m leaving tomorrow,” said Jessica quietly.

Yuri felt the words get lost in her brain, could not find anything to say. She knew it was coming, was inevitable, knew there was nothing she could do to stop it.

“So the summer is over, huh?” Yuri asked softly.

“I think so,” said Jessica, looking into Yuri’s eyes.

They could only see the longing that was built up, but nothing more. The defenses and emotions were amok and could not be found, so they sat there in silence for a short while before Yuri stood up.

Please say something, thought Jessica, Say something to me. Tell me something I want to hear.

“Well, goodbye Jessica,” said Yuri, “Here. These are for you.”

Yuri handed her the bouquet.

“I think today was the last batch of lilies,” she continued.

Jessica stood up and smiled politely.

“Thank you, Yuri. They’re beautiful.”

There was so much left unsaid now, but they both were helpless, being dragged apart and together at once, trying to resist so many things so they could not know which way to go.

They walked to the door together, not saying anything. Jessica held open the door for Yuri as she turned around and looked, one final time, into Jessica’s eyes.

The sun was struggling to stay above the horizon as Yuri spoke.

“Goodbye, Jessica.”

“Goodbye, Yuri.”

They were both quiet, so quiet, as the sun finally disappeared and Jessica closed the door. If only for a few more moments had the sun been up would Jessica have seen something in Yuri’s eyes that she longed for so desperately. If only could she see in the dark, she would have been able to see that Yuri’s eyes were saying, “I love you.”

But the sun was gone now, cast a shadow over the land as Yuri turned and walked away, leaving a trail of tears on the porch, and Jessica sunk against her door and began to sob quietly.

The summer was over.

-------------

Chapter 20

Life began to blur in and out of focus for Yuri and Jessica once the summer had ended. School began once again for Jessica, in New York, and before September was over, her lilies had wilted.

“Summer flowers,” she told herself, “It’s because they’re summer flowers.”

Still, the bouquet remained in a vase in her room until the end of the year, until her mother finally was forced to throw out the dead flowers.

Jessica came home one day and longed to see the bouquet, but found them missing instead. She did not bother asking her mother or one of the maids where it went – she had known that it would only be a matter of time before she needed to let them go.

And so she continued on with her life, until the school year was over and she no longer came home wishing to see a bouquet of white lilies, no longer crying herself to sleep at night.

Yuri eventually returned to work again, and when school started, found that there were plenty of distractions for her to keep her mind off of Jessica. The hurt was always there, but the memories were pushed back to a distant part of her mind, so Yuri could focus on other things instead. But she was in the countryside and appreciated the sunrise and sunset every day, was reminded almost constantly of Jessica – Jessica could not do the same.

They only thought of each other from time to time now, when someone struck a nerve or mentioned flowers and sunsets, but these longings of each other, too, had been pushed aside.

The summer came and went, and Yuri could not help but to wonder if the big manor on the other side of town would stay empty. Jessica secretly wished that her family would go back to the manor, but to no avail. They were separated like this, thinking of each other but never being able to see one another; it was the first summer apart, the summer trying to push all thoughts of each other aside.

Jessica would be entering college that fall, and Yuri would be staying in the same town as she always did, so she could live and breathe by the sunset and be plagued by lilies every summer.

They distanced themselves like this, and finally managed to store each other at the back of their minds so they could continue living – but never forgetting.

------------

Jessica entered her college with many hopes. She felt like it would be the commencement of something new, felt like it was time to leave a part of her life behind her and finally move on.

She was walking down a corridor one day after class holding some of her textbooks. She turned the corner and ran into another person, spilling all her books onto the floor. The man quickly picked up all the books before she even bent down and handed them back to her.

“Sorry,” he said with a big smile, “Didn’t see you there.”

“It’s fine,” she said.

She would have been slightly annoyed, had not his smile been so charming. She took the books back and continued walking, the man walking away in the opposite direction, glancing behind every few steps at her retreating figure.

It was the start of something new, indeed.

-----------

Yuri awoke one morning and headed downstairs to eat breakfast. School had finished, and now all Yuri did was work. She never spent any of her wages, so although she received relatively small pay, she had amassed enough money for her own house if she ever decided that she wanted one.

But for now, she was still living happily with her parents, who were now gone by the time she woke up and often didn’t come home till she was preparing to go to bed.

Yuri left to go to the florist shop, where she worked now. She tended to all the flowers carefully, but during summer always paid extra attention to the lilies.

Summer plants, she thought to herself, Its because they’re summer plants.

But now it was fall, and the summer had just ended, no more bouquets of lilies, no more fresh starts for her.

------------

Yuri was on her way home from work one day when she smelled something burning. She looked far off into the distance and saw smoke, alarmed because she saw fire amidst the billowing grey pillars. She wondered if she would have to evacuate and prayed in her mind for the welfare of all near the fire.

She did not remember that the fire was near where her parents were working , only woke up the next morning to find a policeman knocking on her door, asking her to identify remains.

Never before had Yuri truly understood the meaning of being alone. There was literally no one left for her – Junho was gone with the draft that came with war and she had been barely subsisting until now. Even all the work she was doing could distract her no longer, so she quit all her jobs and sold her parent’s old house. She did not want those memories anyway, wanted to hold on to something that still remained. Yuri bought out a plot of land and began to build – a new house for her new beginning, though she wasn’t thinking of beginnings at all when building, only thought of the past she could not let go of.

She worked from sun up to sun down, in hopes that she would not feel alone forever.

-------------

“No, Mark. Not today, I have to study for a test,” said Jessica.

“It’s going to take about one hour. How about that? We don’t even have to go to a restaurant, let’s just go to a café. Please?” and he flashed her one of his big smiles.

“Mark!” she laughed, “Are you going to let this go or not?”

“Nope. No can do. I need a date or else I will surely die.”

He pouted at Jessica and she finally heaved a sigh.

“Okay, fine. One hour because you won’t leave me alone.”

“Okay, Jessi. You can pretend to be annoyed at me but I know you’re really not. And you don’t have to go if you don’t want to, I was just trying to de-stress you.”

He nodded very matter-of-factly.

“I know, Mark. I’m not mad at you.”

She smiled at him as he wrapped his arms around her.

“Well, shall we go now?” he asked.

“Of course.”

They smiled happily at each other.

Jessica fell in love with Mark in just about no time at all. He was sweet, funny, and charming. Every moment with him she was either smiling or melting – he made her happier than she had been in a long time. 

By the time summer rolled around, they were engaged and planning for an August wedding, was not thinking about Yuri just yet.

“What flowers would you like for the wedding?” asked the wedding planner, “We have –

Jessica stopped what she was doing and looked at the woman.

“What is it? Do you have a flower in mind?”

“Summer flowers,” she said quietly.

Nothing could stop her from thinking of the past now.

----------------

The house was almost finished now, with Yuri keeping herself busy all the time, hammering and nailing away. She thought of Jessica with every door, nook, and cranny in the house. It was, in essence, the house she wanted Jessica to live with her in, though she would never tell. Jessica was her final hope to go on.

Yuri finished the house and sulked for a week, with nothing for her to do but drink away her misery. It was summer again, lily season. She went into town after the week’s hangover was over and bought a large pack of lily seeds. There was no reason to her actions now except that she felt like doing it.

“Yuri?” asked the florist, “Why lilies?”

“Because they’re summer flowers.”

“Exactly, only one season.”

“I wish summer would last forever.”

The next morning she planted row after painstaking row, until the sweat soaked up her shirt completely and the pack was empty. She walked inside and collapsed on her couch, while watching the sun set and drifting off to sleep, dreaming of lilies.

---------------

“Mark,” said Jessica one day as they were sitting in the living of his parent’s house, “I want to go somewhere.”

He smiled and asked, “Where shall we go?”

“I meant by myself.”

He raised his eyebrows curiously.

“Okay, where to?”

“Just this small town, down south. I went there when I was a teenager, and it was beautiful. I miss it.”

“By yourself?”

“Yes, Mark. You don’t have to worry, I just want some time alone.”

“Alright. Come back, okay?” he said it with a big smile.

“Of course.”

And Jessica smiled, thinking of what she had left behind several summers ago.

---------------

Jessica parked her car in the hotel’s parking lot and brought all her luggage to her room. She did not want the first thing she did to be going to see Yuri, so she spent her first two days shopping around the town and eating at local restaurants till she could hold it in no longer.

She asked around town to see where Yuri was now, and received her new address from the florist.

“Thanks,” said Jessica.

“It all makes sense now,” said the florist.

“What?”

“Summer has arrived,” said the florist with a big smile.

Jessica shrugged off his comment and said goodbye, leaving a smiling florist standing in front of a huge display of white lilies.

-------------

Yuri was making dinner from the kitchen of her house when she saw a car pull into her driveway.

“Visitor? Who visits me?”

She continued to stare at the car until it stopped and saw the person she had been longing to see for years the car and walk up to the house. Yuri snapped off the gas on the stove and ran to the door, wondering if it could be true.

Summer had finally arrived again.

---------------

Chapter 21

Yuri flung open the door before Jessica even knocked, and only stood there staring. Her heart was racing and mind in disbelief as Jessica stopped moving and began to spew incoherent word vomit, not knowing what to say. 

She had been planning to stand in front of the door for several minutes to gather her thoughts, but Yuri threw the door open before she could figure out what to say.

“Y-Yuri,” said Jessica, “It’s so good to see you. You look w-well, I see.”

Yuri only stared, face blank. She was soaking in every detail of Jessica, did not know if she could really believe that Jessica was there.

Another few moments passed in silence.

“I-I should go,” said Jessica, “I shouldn’t be here. It was nice seeing you, Yuri.”

“No, come in please,” said Yuri as Jessica was turning, “Let’s have dinner. Are you hungry?”

“Yeah,” said Jessica, “I think I am.”

They smiled lightly at each other as Yuri held open the door for her and stepped inside.

----------

“It’s beautiful,” said Jessica, looking around the house.

Yuri wanted to tell Jessica how beautiful she looked, but only smiled and said, “Thanks.”

Jessica did not yet know that it was her house, the house Yuri built out of her memories of Jessica.

They were sitting at the dinner table with their food finished and were now catching up on everything the two of them had been missing.

“It’s been a long time,” said Jessica.

“Too long,” nodded Yuri in agreement.

“How is everything?” Yuri asked, “Tell me everything.”

Jessica smiled before she began to speak. Yuri had always loved Jessica’s voice, would love it until the day she died.

The sun was down now, and they were in the living room, sitting facing each other on two armchairs. Jessica had told Yuri about all she could remember at the moment – her new friends, college life, places she had been – but had not yet mentioned Mark.

“So what about you, Yuri? I’ve just been talking and talking. You must be tired of my voice by now.”

“Of course not,” said Yuri, “I’ve been okay. Life hasn’t been as eventful for me as for you, but I’m doing just fine.”

“Where are your parents?” asked Jessica, “I really want to see them. They were so sweet.”

“They were sweet, weren’t they? I really want to see them, too,” said Yuri sadly.

“I’m so sorry,” said Jessica as she realized the meaning behind Yuri’s words, “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s fine.” And Yuri smiled sadly.

“I’ve been up to other things you know,” Yuri continued, “I’ve been brushing up on my cooking. I’m one heck of a cook now.” She smiled a brighter smile at Jessica.

“I can see! That dinner was delicious,” said Jessica brightly.

They moved past the topic of sadness and death and onto the future – and Jessica still did not mention Mark.

All too soon, it was too late for Jessica to stay any longer, so she stood up to leave, and Yuri escorted her to the door.

“Thank you for the lovely evening,” said Jessica.

“You’re welcome. It was nice seeing you again,” said Yuri, “Will you be back tomorrow?”

Jessica paused for a moment to think, then smiled.

“I would love to.”

“Okay,” said Yuri with a smile as she watched Jessica walk to her car and then drive off.

She was still smiling when she closed the front door behind her and walked into the house.

What a great night.

-------------

“So how long did it take you to build this house, Yuri?”

They were sitting in the living room again, but it was earlier in the day. Jessica had stopped by just before noon so they could eat lunch and spend the entire day together catching up like they both wanted to for so long.

“A few months, I’ve been building since winter.”

“I see, why this location?”

“Because it’s clear.”

“What?”

“Because the landscape is clear, so I can always see the sunrise and the sunset.”

Yuri smiled longingly at Jessica, wondering if Jessica could tell how she was feeling.

Like two summers ago, they still had words left unspoken again, and, like two summers ago, neither knew how to say it.

Have you found anyone else?

-----------

It was past dinnertime now, and their conversation was dragging to its end.

“Have you been seeing anyone?” Jessica finally asked.

Yuri swallowed the lump that had suddenly formed in her throat and spoke.

“No, not really, you?”

Yuri wanted Jessica to say “same here,” so she could believe that Jessica came back to be with her. She did not know that Jessica came back for her anyway, regardless of whether or not she was single.

“I’m engaged.”

Yuri smiled.

“Really? That’s great. Tell me about this person.”

“His name is Mark. He’s a sweet guy, I think you’d like him, Yuri.”

“Would I?”

“I certainly would hope so. He’s in medical school. I met him in college. He has a great sense of humor – I’m sure you two would get along great.”

Yuri nodded and smiled, while Jessica was gauging her reaction.

A part of her wanted Yuri to accept it and move on, but another, more overwhelming part wanted Yuri to fight for Jessica.

“Well, when are you out of town again?” asked Yuri.

“Tomorrow. This was my last night here. Thanks so much,” said Jessica as she stood up.

“Well, I think I should be going now,” said Jessica, “It’s getting late and I need to call Mark.”

“Alright,” said Yuri with a smile, escorting her to the door.

“Bye, Yuri,” said Jessica.

“Good luck to you and Mark, Jessica. It was nice seeing you again.”

Jessica smiled and turned away, and although she wanted her to, Yuri did not chase after Jessica, only watched as she got in her car and drove off.

This night, Yuri was not smiling as she closed the front door behind her and headed off to bed.

-----------------

Jessica had her bags packed by the morning after and was debating whether to eat breakfast at the hotel or to swing by Yuri’s house one last time to visit.

She had no reaction. She’s over me. I don’t need to go back anymore, what would what do?

But the truth was that Jessica was scared of risking it, scared that knowing she would see Yuri one more time would throw her helplessly into Yuri’s arms, and because she was scared of rejection. She did not want to know that Yuri had already moved on, had already healed her wounds.

She sighed to herself and she went outside to put the luggage in her car, then went back to the reception desk to check out.

Jessica wondered

“Jung, Jessica. Room 234B”

“Alrighty, ma’am, thank you for your stay.”

Jessica got into her car and sighed. She wished that Yuri would have done something, she wished that Yuri would have grabbed her and pulled her into her arms and tell her to never leave again.

But Yuri didn’t. She only smiled and wished her luck, only watched her drive away.

I don’t pull you in anymore, Yuri? Was it over 2 summers ago?

Jessica began to cry in an odd mix of anger, frustration, and sadness as she drove off.

She did not know that Yuri had drunken bottle after bottle that night, until she passed out. She did not know Yuri had been hurting just as much as she was.

Though Jessica was driving away, they were both being dragged helplessly towards one another, yet again.

----------- 

Chapter 22 (Final Chapter)

Jessica was sitting on her couch, head thrown back and pointed towards the ceiling, eyes closed. She was listening to the sound of summer rain falling on her roof from inside her living room.

Drip .Drip. Drip. Drip.

Her hand was lying limp on the armrest as her fingertips dawdled over its edge, tapping lightly. The room was silent except for the sound of clacks, made by the meeting of fingernail and wood.

Clack. Clack. Clack. Clack.

The clacks steadily grew louder and became more and more rapid, suddenly stopping when Jessica’s eyes flew open. She let out a long sigh and remained completely motionless for a while, until –

Clack. Clack. Clack. Clack.

Yet again. It had been that way for several hours now.

-------------

Clack. Clack. Clack. Clack.

If the sun had come out at all that day, it would have already disappeared, as Jessica remained on the couch. She did not sleep, did not eat, did not drink, only sat there –

Clack. Clack. Clack. Clack.

Clack. Clack. Clack. – 

Her front door opened and in walked Mark, peeking around the hallway and spotting Jessica on the couch. Her hands were folded across her lap and the corners of her mouth rose upward softly.

“Hey,” he said, standing in the hallway pensively, still smiling at her – his first welcome sight all day.

“Hi, Mark.”

She said it softly, like she always did, but she was not looking at him. Mark remained still, trying to figure out what could possibly be wrong. His smile was locked in place and a rigid “how are you?” sputtered from his mouth.

“I’m fine,” she said with her eyes, her mind elsewhere.

Mark replied, “Aren’t you going to invite me in?”

His smile was flattened slightly as he continued to stare, wondering when she would look at him. His head was tilted a little to the side, hair soaked and dripping drops of water onto the floor.

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

“Oh, of course,” said Jessica, jerking back to reality and looking at Mark. The smile crept onto her face and Mark hung his coat on the rack and made his way to her on the couch. He sat down and turned towards her, waiting for her to speak, smile on face and hopes at heart. She was facing forward, staring at the now empty hallway.

Clack. Clack. Clack. Clack.

Clack. Clack. Clack. Cl –

“Jessica?” he asked finally, “Anything wrong?”

Her head jerked in his direction and the smile crept back onto her face as she gazed at him.

“Oh, no Mark, I’m fine.” 

“Well?” he asked, eyebrows raised.

“Well, what?” she responded in confusion.

“Your trip!” he said, laughing, “It’s been a few days, don’t I get a hug or something?”

His arms opened wide, inviting her in.

“Oh, Mark! I’m sorry,” she said as she accepted.

“It’s okay,” he said softly into her ear, “You must be tired.”

His eyes were closed while Jessica rested her head on his chest. Mark breathed in her scent deeply.

“I love you,” he whispered, eyes still closed.

Jessica’s eyes shot open.

“I love you, too, Mark.”

He smiled brightly as she closed her eyes again, mind elsewhere.

------------

Yuri was sitting the steps of her back porch, rain falling down on her. She had been immobile for a while now, hair and clothes soaked as she stared at the field of lilies. Some of the younger, weaker lilies had begun to fall over under the force of rain while the others struggled to remain upright. She stared at the field longingly, wondering if any of them could withstand the force of rain.

Even if they do, she thought to herself, there’s always the end of summer.

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

The wind blew from time to time, enveloping Yuri in coldness and urging her back in the house, but she would not budge, not until little light that was there finally vanished. The field black and rain still pouring, Yuri stood and headed inside, boots clacking on the porch and sound of rain overwhelming everything.

Clack. Clack. Clack. Clack.

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

The door opened, then slammed shut.

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

-----------

Mark and Jessica were sitting at the kitchen table. She was playing with her nails, mind elsewhere as he looked through some papers. His head tilted upwards and he looked at her.

“Aren’t you going to invite your friend? From the south?”

She was still fiddling with her hands.

“Yuri? Was that what you said her name was?”

Jessica’s head shot up.

“Yeah, that’s her name,” she said.

“Well?” he asked, eyebrows raised and smile on face.

“Huh?”

Her mind was halfway between elsewhere and right here with her eyes locked on Mark.

“Are you going to invite her?” he said with a laugh, “You’re so cute when you doze off.”

She smiled at him.

“Weren’t all the invitations sent out a month ago?”

“Yeah, but you can still send a late invitation. You just visited her for a few days so I assumed she was close. It’s just weird, I thought –

“You’re right. I should invite her. She’s a good friend,” Jessica said, “She’s been a good friend.”

“Alright. I’ll send her an invitation tomorrow.”

Jessica nodded to herself, smiling, as Mark laughed and resumed shuffling through his papers.

She resumed playing with her nails, mind elsewhere.

-------------

Yuri was walking to her living room while shifting through her mail. She sat down on the couch and tossed letter by letter onto the table, sighing all the while. Her face froze when she reached the last letter.

Her shaking hands fumbled with the envelope and after several tries she finally ripped it open. Its contents fell to the floor as she tossed the envelope aside and hastily reached down to grab it. She took a deep breath before she read the card she had just picked up off the floor. Her fingers were running over the design – flowers – that bordered the card. A vein popped out of her neck, becoming more and more pronounced as she read on. She finished and tossed the card on the table. Her expression unchanged, she threw her head back on the couch, closed her eyes, and placed her hand on the armrest with her fingers dawdling over the edge.

Clack. Clack. Clack. Clack.

--------------

The next day, Yuri was walking through town, to the post office, holding a wrapped package with an envelope taped on top.

“I need this express mailed,” said Yuri. She was standing at the counter of the office, hands holding the package softly and protectively.

The man behind the counter eyed the oddly shaped package, wrapped in white paper.

“Okay, hand it over, please.”

“It’s fragile,” whispered Yuri softly, eyes filled with concern.

“Ma’am, whether or not it is fragile, you have to give it to me if you want it mailed.”

He held out his hand and looked at Yuri.

“It’s fragile,” repeated Yuri, looking into the man’s eyes as she slid the package towards him.

“I get it, I get it,” the man rolled his eyes as he picked up the package. He looked at Yuri and raised his eyebrows.

“Flowers? Couldn’t you just have called up a florist near wherever this is going?”

“No,” said Yuri, “It’s not the same.”

“Whatever you say, lady,” he said as he turned around and headed towards the back of the office.

“They’re fragile,” Yuri whispered softly as the man disappeared. She hung her head and walked out, of the office, steps heavy and short.

Clack. Clack. Clack. Clack.

------------

Jessica was lying on her couch, taking an afternoon nap as the rays of the sun fell on her face. The door opened and in came Mark holding a package. He took off his shoes as he saw Jessica on the couch and smiled. 

He made his way to her almost noiselessly, placed the oddly shaped package wrapped in white on the coffee table and knelt beside the couch. He kissed her forehead lightly and placed his hand on her shoulder, but soon withdrew his hand. Mark stood up and took a seat in an armchair, closed his eyes, and eventually dozed off to sleep.

Jessica awoke several hours later to an empty apartment. There was a white package on the coffee table along with a note.

Jess,

I stopped by and picked up your mail but when I got inside you were sleeping. I have to make some final arrangements so I need to leave, but I just wanted to let you know you look like an angel when you’re sleeping and I couldn’t bear to wake you up. I tried to sleep, too, but I still woke up before you did. You should enter a contest for this stuff, if those exist. Oh, and I think the white package is from your friend down south.

I love you,

Mark 

Jessica’s placed the note back onto the coffee table as she eyed the package on the coffee table. She picked it up in haste as her hands fumbled over the wrapping paper, stopping when she spotted the card.

Jessica, it was addressed in Yuri’s handwriting.

Hands shaking, she tore open the envelope. She took a deep breath and began to read.

Dear Jessica,

Thank you for the invitation to your wedding. I regret that I can not come. I thought a handwritten note would be more personal and appropriate given our long friendship.

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

It’s crazy how much time has passed already. I smile when I think of the past, and I hope you do, too. We really had some great memories together, remember? It’s very freeing, this letter. I feel like I’m being freed when I’m writing this. I’m really happy for you and Mark, you seem to love him a lot and he sounds like a great guy. God bless your marriage. I only hope for the best for both of you. Send me a picture of the ceremony sometime.

With Love,

Yuri

P.S. Enclosed is my wedding gift to you – I hope you can use it for something in your wedding, if it’s not too much to ask.

Jessica placed the letter onto the coffee table with one hand and tried to wipe away her tears with the other. She reached for the package and tore it open. 

It felt like flowers, but with hope Jessica ripped the packaging anyway.

She tossed the white wrapping paper onto the floor and twirled the bouquet of lilies in her hands, glancing at each flower – perfect. She hugged the bouquet tightly as she pulled her knees into her chest.

Eyes closed, tears began to fall onto the wooden frame of the couch.

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

------------

“This doesn’t look good,” said Mark. He was standing in room in the church, looking out at the dark grey clouds that were forming outside.

“Don’t worry about it, son,” said Mr. Jung, “the wedding is indoors. Won’t really make a difference.”

“I know,” said Mark, straightening out his bowtie, “but I wanted the sun to be shining. It’s summer, after all.”

“It’s fine, I’m sure Jessica won’t really mind,” said Mr. Jung as he walked out, leaving Mark to stare out the window in his tuxedo.

-----------

“You look lovely, Jessica,” said the bridesmaid.

Jessica glanced at the bridesmaid’s reflection in her mirror.

“Thanks,” she said. 

It was short and crisp, hung in the air for a while.

“I’m going to be leaving now, Jessica. The ceremony starts soon, and I think your father is waiting outside the door.”

“Okay,” Jessica replied softly, eyes fixed on her own reflection in the mirror now.

She heard the door closing and took a deep breath, still staring at the mirror.

She felt that something was wrong but didn’t know what – she looked over her every feature. Everything was done perfectly. Her hair was pinned up and the dress was beautiful, pure, pure white, just like the bouquet of perfect lilies sitting next to the mirror.

The Canon played, and then came a knock on her door.

“Jessica,” she heard her father’s voice, muffled through the door, “I don’t mean to rush, but you have a wedding to attend.”

“One minute,” she said, short and crisp.

“Okay, dear. I’m right here when you’re ready.”

She picked up the make-up box, looked at her reflection, and paused for several moments before putting it back down. Rain began to fall outside, clouds grey, as Jessica continued to stare at the mirror.

“Jessica?” said the muffled voice from outside.

Her father’s tone of voice was raised, urging her on.

“Coming,” she said with a small smile.

Jessica tore her eyes away from the mirror and picked up the bouquet gently. She looked over each flower tenderly before rising and walking towards the door. She opened it and paused, looking over her shoulder back at her reflection, not sure if she was seeing what she wanted to. She did not realize that the problem was not the mirror or the bouquet.

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

“You look beautiful, Jessica,” said her father with a beaming smile.

Jessica looked away from the mirror and at her father. She smiled lightly at him and closed the door, hoping to shield herself from the sound of the rain on the window. The rain began to pour down heavily now, so that it could be heard on the rooftop of the church.

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

“Ready to go?” said her father, extending his elbow towards her.

Jessica looked down at the bouquet in her hands, so perfect and pure, and smiled. She raised her head, still smiling. She locked elbows with her father as the music stopped and heads in the hall of the Church turned towards the hallway, anticipating the bride.

All that could be heard was –

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

Yuri was sitting in the rain staring at the field of lilies, reminiscing as lily after lily succumbed to the force of rain. There was a pile of lilies beside her, and she herself was holding a flower, picking off petal by petal and smiling. 

The porch was covered in petals.

“Yuri,” said Jessica, “Care to show me around?”

They were at a carnival in the middle of summer.

Jessica smiled as she took her first step into the aisle, father by her side and mind elsewhere – thinking of a carnival in the middle of summer.

“Wait, Yuri! When will I see you again?”

Yuri was standing beside a gate, with Jessica on the other side.

“Soon,” said Yuri, in her detached manner, “I promise,” and gave Jessica another reassuring smile.

She closed the gate and Jessica stood on the other side, looking at her.

“Okay, you promised, Yuri.”

“I did.” 

Yuri’s eyes were red as she picked off the last petal and tossed the flower aside. She picked up another one and continued to imagine.

All that could be heard was –

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

“I don’t want your first kiss.”

They were sitting in the storage room of a dairy.

“Well, too bad, Yuri, because –

“Here, take it back,” said Yuri. 

And she moved towards Jessica this time, cupping Jessica’s face in her hands and placing lips upon lips, eyes closed.

Jessica looked at Mark and smiled, walking ever closer to him, mind elsewhere – thinking of her first kiss.

All that could be heard in the quiet church was –

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

Yuri tossed the naked lily aside and reached for another one. It was the last lily. She glanced at the pile of bare stems and then at the porch, drowning in rain and white petals, before she began to pluck off petal by petal while dreaming of the past.

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

“Do you, Jessica Jung, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?”

They were on the couch, Jessica caressing Yuri’s bruises softly.

“How does it feel, Yuri?”

Jessica smiled, looking at Mark, mind elsewhere.

“I do,” she said, as somewhere miles away, another petal fell.

“Do you, Mark –

“I love you,” said Yuri when they broke apart.

They were in the storage room of the dairy.

“I love you, too, Yuri.”

They smiled at each other softly as Yuri leaned in to give Jessica a soft kiss.

“Then I now pronounce you husband and wife,” said the reverend.

A ring slid onto Jessica’s a finger on Jessica’s left hand as a petal fell. A man wrapped his arms around Jessica and kissed her. Another petal fell.

The cheers of the people sitting in the pews drowned out the –

Drip. Drip. Drip. Drip.

“Goodbye, Jessica,” whispered Yuri softly as she plucked off the final petal.

She tossed the last stem aside as the rain fell ever so harshly, and a perfect bouquet was tossed, miles away, into the air, by a blushing bride still thinking of her first love – mind elsewhere, mind with Yuri.

--------------

The End

Author’s final comments:

Before I wrote this fic, I really had no idea I could write so much. The fic is over 100 pages long in my word doc, and I seriously am astounded that I managed to do it. I would first like to thank my Boss, JJ~ for helping me so much with this, because she basically came up with the entire plot and I only added on details to the skeletons.

I personally really liked the premise of this fic because I loved “The Notebook,” both movie and book, and also because I was sincerely surprised by the feedback. I did not know that people enjoyed my writing and I’m grateful for every view and comment. I hope that when my Boss and I come up with another fic, you can all join us again. 

Till next time, it has been fun writing for you all.

- Mai