[Click]

   The camera set on auto and takes the next shot.

[Click]

   My naked body is spread out on the bed and I watch him. And he watches me. His eyes drink me in. Mine never leave his. I always worry this is the last time. He takes pictures of me like it's all he's going to get. We are left in this standoff. Me wanting him to retire and him wanting to stay in for his buddies. I know his buddies are the reason he makes it home when he's deployed. We fight. We scream. I cry and he says sorry. I need him to stay. I need him to stop. It's the same every time. This is our life. I bite the side of my cheek.

[Click]

   He shifts in his seat.

[Click]

   Can camera's capture love and keep it alive in a sea of sand? Is a picture enough? Will our relationship become just a picture? How long can I do this for? This never ending war and country before me. I've never been much of a patriot. This lifestyle isn't what I wanted. Everything I should say out loud and never do.

[Click]

   He stands.

[Click]

   I have this fear hanging over my head. Someday, I'd get a knock at the door. It will be that knock. It's got so bad I put a sign on the door when he's gone. It says don't knock or ring the doorbell.

[Click]

   He stops the camera. God this man hurts. I pull my knees up to my chest. My hot face buried. Tears run down my legs. We hurt. The bed dips. I feel his touch as he pulls me into his lap. The room is silent and he rocks me. Like a flower, I open to his touch because if I'm honest with myself it's always been him. It will always be him. My end and my start.

   "I love you," and he smiles at me. Then tilts my chin and our kiss is salty.