1. Feelings have always run deep.

Hard work doesn't count for much, waiting for long doesn't count for much either. As long as the crashing waves can settle down, everything will go as one desires. However, life is always a tragicomedy, the amount you put in isn't the same as what you get.

It was once again time for the yearly arts festival. The two shows our class would present was a skit from Song Cheng and Guan He's erhu performance. Guan He invited me to perform with her. I laughed in surprise, "That's not possible, I have no arty cells in me."

Guan He laughed, "You only need to sing along with the music. It's the same as singing karaoke."

I still shook my head so she gave me a deep explanation for why she wanted me to perform, "Our high school entrance exams are coming soon, afterwards, we won't know if we can enter the same school. Even if we do go to the same school, the chances of us being in the same class is very small. Perhaps with time, you and I will naturally drift apart. I only want to leave a memory for our year as desk mates. Perhaps one day, when you see your daughter performing on stage, you'll suddenly remember me, remember that there was a girl who once sang along with you. After we enter high school, I'll focus on studying and stop participating in these cultural activities. This is probably the last performance of my middle school life so I want it to be special. This is my graduation present for myself, and also for you."

Her words were so passionate. What was worse though was that I was actually moved by her words. I said, "When the time comes, don't blame me if we're an embarrassment."

Guan He understood it as me agreeing and laughed, "It's fine, I didn't plan to get the award."

Zhang Jun seemed to be let out but he would still miss classes from time to time. The teachers all knew that it was because he was taken to the police station to be interrogated so he didn't even need to provide an excuse note.

When Zhang Jun was at school, he always wore a solemn expression as if he was pondering a question. I suspected that even when he wasn't in the police station, he would still be thinking of how to answer their questions. The questions he was faced with now wasn't any easier to the ones earlier on. Perhaps he didn't do much but he knew quite a lot, personal loyalty didn't make it an easy decision.

Zhang Jun was still Zhang Jun, still as listless as before. However, the way those few devils from Class(7) looked at Zhang Jun was now different. They were very quiet in class and listened attentively. Anyhow, all of a sudden, Zhang Jun grew a lot of deterrent force.

Hao Lian still didn't come to school. Although even the most gossipy students weren't clear on his news, everyone could tell that his crime was definitely more serious than Zhang Jun's.

Tong Yun Zhu often went to find Zhang Jun. When Zhang Jun wasn't deep in thought, he would definitely be accompanying her.

Everyone saw Zhang Jun and Tong Yun Zhu often but they never saw him with his girlfriend, Chen Su Nan. I had a feeling that Zhang Jun was probably going to get dumped again. And as expected, not long after, news spread from the high school department that Chen Su Nan and Zhang Jun broke up. Her way of breaking up was, compared to his previous two girlfriends, ten times more artistic, it really suited the expectations of teenage girls.

That day, Song Cheng and the others were discussing scripts for their skit and Guan He and I were discussing what we should sing when the hubbub in the corridors suddenly quietened. A few girls ran in and apologetically asked, "Can we listen to the radio?"

We all nodded in confusion, thinking that something had happened in school and the head wanted to speak.

They opened the radio and the radio host's voice ran out in the classroom, charged with emotion, "The next song is chosen by our station's previous president, Chen Su Nan, to her good friend, Zhang Jun. She wants to say three words to him, first is 'thank you', second, 'goodbye' and third, 'sorry'. Let us all enjoy the Taiwanese singer, Chen Shu Hua's 'Red Dust'.

I hung out at the karaoke bar often but this was my first time hearing this song. The song was really good but thinking that, "The heart that should have been yours, it is still protected in my chest" is Chen Su Nan and "Thus the you who didn't want to go, must bid farewell to me who is no longer here" is Zhang Jun- made me hear happiness from a song filled with sadness. I couldn't help stopping laughing and Guan He also started to laugh.

A girl in the corridor shouted, "Zhang Jun is downstairs, he's also heard it."

Everyone in the classroom rushed out to the corridors and leaned by the windows looking down. Guan He also dragged me out.

In the courts, Zhang Jun and Tong Yun Zhu were walking side by side. The school's loudspeakers were playing the song and the speakers in every classroom were also playing it like a big choir.

I couldn't see what kind of expression Zhang Jun had, I only say him and Tong Yun Zhu stand there for a bit and then walk in the opposite direction of the school building, he probably predicted that there will be a group of people waiting to see him in the middle school department's corridors.

The girls were all very touched after hearing the song. The talked in whispers and actually in a moment, derived that Zhang Jun, Chen Su Nan and Tong Yun Zhu were in a love triangle. Oh, there's also an extra person, Hao Lian, it's a love square.

Guan He rested her face on my shoulder as her whole body shook with laughter. Originally, I also laughed but as I laughed, I suddenly remembered that actually, there is an outside lead- Guan He, and a passerby- Luo Qi Qi.

Although I was still laughing, anguish slowly spread around my body. The girl iwho is able to wave goodbye to Zhang Jun is so lucky, how come I can't do the same?

The feelings at this age are unpredictable, in a split second, you'll like someone, in a split second, you'll also stop liking someone. You'll like him because of his silhouette in the window, you'll also stop liking because of something immature that he said; you'll like him because of a certain expression in his eyes, you'll also stop liking him because of his certain actions......

The classmates around me were really like this, this term, they'll like person A, next term, perhaps they'll start liking person B. They'll be falling in and out of love at the same time but why can't I be like that? So many years have gone by and on one side, I'd decide to drift away from Zhang Jun but on the other side, I'd always be caring for him, feeling heartache for him, feeling bad for him.

"Next, we'll be appreciating poetry. Today, the poetry we are playing for everyone is......"

I walked into the classroom and pulled the cord, closing the radio. I said to Guan He, "How about we choose this song, the tune isn't very high."

"When the entire audience is laughing, Zhang Jun will come looking for us."

"Scared of him? Isn't he just here to amuse everyone? This year he's even more entertaining than entertainers. One moment, he's playing a Hong Kong gangster film, next, he's playing a Taiwanese Qiong Yao drama, I feel like we should award him with a 'best entertainer of the year' award."

Chen Song , Li Shan and the others around us all started laughing.

Guan He also laughed, "No wonder you're a pro at debating! Luckily you don't like to fight or else who would be able to argue and win against you?"

"Then should we just sing this song? Even if we can't win an award, we can borrow Zhang Jun's thunder and be awarded with the audience's laughter."

Guan He laughed until she couldn't breathe, "It's not possible, as soon as we get screened by the headmaster, our act will be dropped. Our headmaster hates students copying Taiwanese and Hong Kong things the most. Luckily the No. 1 principal isn't him or else it'll be like a concentration camp here."

I said to her seriously, "don't choose a revolutionary song, I can't sing those; also don't choose an ethnic song, I can't sing those either."

Guan He shook her head worriedly.

I went back to read my novels and left her to think of a solution. Hopefully she won't be able to think of one and give up on me.

Xiao Bo was in the sprint for the gaokao and was studying very strenuously. Guan He and I were also busy preparing for the arts festival so I didn't go to find Xiao Bo for a very long time.

Every Monday, the school would have a formal flag raising ceremony. The high school department stood on the left side of the courts and the middle school department stood on the right. After the flag raising, each department will sum up the week.

However, today, it was very unusual, the school convened the high school and middle school students together and the principal started speaking.

"......In the future, the school will definitely strengthen our studious atmosphere. Recently, some disgusting things has happened in the school and has seriously impacted No. 1's reputation outside of the school. The school has decided to deal with these things sternly so we have decided to hold disciplinary actions for these students.

The disciplinary director held a list of names and started calling them out: "Middle school 3rd year, Class (3)'s Hao Lian is to be expelled; middle school 3rd year, Class (3)'s Zhang Jun is to be under school observation for half a year; high school 1st year's xxx ...., high school 2nd year's xxx......"

Suddenly, I heard, "High school 3rd year Class (6)'s Xu Xiao Bo is to be expelled......"

I was frozen in shock, unable to believe what I just heard. I definitely heard wrong! It's definitely someone else whose name sounds similar to his!

The principal started speaking but I only wanted to seize the list of names in his hands and carefully look through them. Finally, when this slow and arduous assembly came to an end, I immediately rushed to the school's announcement board.

It was really Xiao Bo!

I couldn't bother with class, and I turned wanting to leave. Guan He saw my intentions and reminded me, "The principal already said, every homeroom teacher has to be strict on discipline now. Don't put push the gun on yourself."

I ignored her and sneaked out of school. I called a tazi and went to the karaoke bar.

The karaoke bar's doors were firmly shut. I knocked for a long time but no one came to open it so I could only go to 'Across the Water' but I never expected 'Across the Water' to also be firmly locked.

I worriedly slammed at the door. Finally, a window opened and when seeing it was me, the person inside called to me, "Luo Qi Qi."

I rushed over, "Where's Brother Li? Where's Xiao Bo?"

He pulled my hand and let me climb inside, "Wait, I'll call Brother Li and tell him that you're here."

I walked to and fro waiting. He finished the call and came back, "Brother Li said that he's coming over immediately and told you to wait."

"What exactly happened?"

"I don't know the exact details, I only heard that Brother Xiao Bo's place was reported for drugs. Brother Wu Zei was taken to jail and I think Brother Xiao Bo crippled someone so Brother Li closed all his businesses for now."

I sat paralysed on the sofa, unable to move.

Hearing a car outside beep, he quickly went to open the door and let me leave, "Brother Li is here."

I hurriedly ran out and sat down by Brother Li, unable to wait, "Where's Xiao Bo?"

Brother Li's eyes were bloodshot, "I got people to escort him out of the province."

"Will he be sentenced?"

"I'm trying my best to deal with the injured person. I hope he'll be able to tell the police that he didn't see who hit him clearly."

"Are your chances of succeeding big?"

"There's a door. I've sent people to use both hard and soft tactics. His parents are both old, him being crippled is already a reality now. Compared to sending Xiao Bo to jail with just a few words, taking the money and spending the rest of his life well is better. If he wants to fight with us, we can't do anything about it but unless he sends me along to prison as well, then after this year's storm has gone, his family better prepare a coffin because I'm ready to risk everything."

"Why did Xiao Bo do this? Does the karaoke bar really have drugs?"

"You know my rules, we definitely don't meddle with drugs. The karaoke bar was framed for drugs. You'll have to blame me for this, I wanted to properly business this year. I only saw the ruckus Little Six was making and didn't protect my back. Xiao Bo wasn't able to argue against the charge so to protect Xiao Bo and I, Wu Zei put the charges on his head. At that time, I lost control of my emotions for a few days and said a few words I shouldn't have. I pushed Xiao Bo too hard and added to the news that Wu Zei was definitely going to jail, Xiao Bo became impulsive and this happened."

I looked in front of me at a loss. Wasn't Xiao Bo the person who had the most rationality and restraint? Didn't he tell me that the world was very big, and that I shouldn't injure my wings early on? Wasn't the thing he wanted to do the most to go to university?

I murmured, "Xiao Bo was expelled by the school."

Brother Li was very downcast but he assured me, "No problem, as long as this thing calms over, later I'll think of a way to get him to do the gaokao in another province. There's still time for him to take it next year, think of it as him waiting a year for you."

I didn't say anything, my head rested against the window.

"Qi Qi, go back to school." Brother Li's car stopped outside No. 1's gates. "Seeing Little Six's brothers all either betray him or run away shows that they they see their lives as more important. At the critical moment, no one sees him as the big brother. However, Xiao Bo and Wu Zei will for sure use their bodies to protect me from the knives. I am the same towards them so don't worry, I definitely wouldn't let anything happen to them.

I didn't make a sound. Not let anything happen to them? Right now one is in jail and the other has escaped the province, is this called not letting anything happen?

Brother Li continued, "I know that you feel really bad inside and want to help Xiao Bo but you can't do anything. As long as you study hard at school, that's the biggest help to us."

As Brother Li said this, the veins on his hands were jumping.

I nodded, opened the car door and got off. I turned back and reminded him, "If there's any news, you have to tell me, no matter if it's good......or bad."

"I know."

When I entered the class, I thought that Teacher Wu would punish me but I didn't expect her to let me in.

I didn't have the energy to think over it and silently sat down at my desk.

Guan He whispered, "I helped you take leave. I said that your period came unexpectedly again. Later after class, if the teacher asks you, don't spill the beans."

I nodded, actually she thought too much. Teacher Wu trusted Guan He, whatever she said, the teacher would definitely believe.

~~~~~~~~~~

Wow, that was an unexpected turn of events. I'm really curious now to what Brother Li said that made Xiao Bo act like that. This is the last chapter of book one though so I'm sure it'll end with a (hopefully good) bang. I'm still trying to get my head over what just happened though. What the heck!? What are your reactions to this part?

I know that a lot of you are curious to what happens to Xiao Bo next and not a lot happens in this part of the chapter so I've summarised the not so important stuff in this part to jump to Xiao Bo's scene.

2. Memory that will last forever.

There are some moments which you will realise are deeply engraved in your memory only after it has passed. Many years later, at night, when you suddenly remember it, you will lightly smile. Those people have already rowed away in the river of time, disappeared without a trace. In your heart however, they have crossed past the warmth of the river of time and will never disappear.

Xiao Bo's incident makes Luo Qi Qi quieten down. She stops being rebelliousness and stubborn and starts to study hard. They also have the arts festival but as someone from the skit is sick, Qi Qi is called on to play one of the characters as substitute. The skit which was written by Song Chen with contributions from everyone in the class, is wacky and funny. It's met with much welcome and laughter from the audience. However, when it becomes time for Qi Qi and Guan He to sing, Qi Qi becomes increasingly nervous, especially when she thinks about Zhang Jun sitting in the audience watching her. She loses her voice and Class (7) starts whistling and making a ruckus when suddenly, Zhang Jun stands up and shouts, "What are you making a noise for? If you don't want to listen then get out!" Which makes them quieten down immediately. They restart the song and Qi Qi sings it all. Afterwards, they didn't receive any awards for their song, probably the first time that Guan He has lost in a performance but their class wins second for the skit.

In my memory, that was the arts festival with the most laughter. No matter if they were teachers or students, even the stern headmaster was laughing.

We were also laughing the whole time. After the award giving was over, it was already ten at night but no one wanted to go home. We shouted for Song Chen to treat us. Song Chen received wages so in our eyes, he was a tycoon and everyone often extorted him for money.

Song Chen waved his hand, "No problem, let's go eat malatang."

Everyone cheered in agreement and we walked out as a group with the wave of people leaving, not forgetting to insult each other and joke around while we walked.

Our group was the brightest scene in the people in the sea of people.

When we walked out the school door, just as we were about to turn left, I suddenly caught a glimpse of a familiar figure standing under the dim street light on the street. I immediately threw off Guan He's hand and ran to the other side of the road.

Xiao Bo smiled at me, his hands in his pockets.

I didn't think much, I was only excited so I immediately rushed towards him and hugged him asking, "Why didn't you call out to me?"

A whistle came over from the school gates, I angrily shouted back, "What are you whistling for!" Then immediately asked, "When did you come back? Is everything fine now?"

He smiled and replied, "I came back today afternoon."

I was extremely happy, "Can you still make it for gaokao? But you've wasted too much time, how about next year. You can revise for another year and get into a better school."

Guan He, Song Chen, Li Shan......They all walked over, standing far away on a side. Song Chen shouted, "Luo Qi Qi, are you coming to eat malatang?"

I hesitated, not saying anything. Guan He shouted, "Qi Qi."

Xiao Bo pushed me, "Quickly go, they're all waiting for you."

I could only walk towards Guan He, Song Chen and the other. The group of people laughed around, walking towards the night market, discussing which shop's malatang tasted better."

As I walked, I kept turning back, watching as Xiao Bo turned around, his hands in the pockets of his pants, walking with his head lowered.

Under the light, his shadow looked long.

I suddenly stopped walking and said to Guan He, "I'm really sorry, I can't eat malatang with you guys tonight. I still have some things to do."

Song Chen and the others started shouting, "Too impudent, you're going back on your word."

Li Shan gently said, "Let's all go together or else we'll be leaving you out. It's nearly time for our high school entrance exam, every opportunity to gather is another chance we'll be losing."

Guan He also tried to persuade me, "Qi Qi, you put in so much effort tonight, how can we celebrate without you?"

I didn't mind the other people and only smiled apologetically at Guan He before turning around and running to chase after Xiao Bo. When I nearly reached him, I jumped onto him and put my hands around his neck, "Treat me to lamb skewers."

Xiao Bo gazed at me, smiling, "Aren't you going to eat malatang?"

"I like eating lamb skewers more."

Later, I kept thinking, perhaps that night, Xiao Bo discovered that although we've known each other for nearly six years and we thought we were family, actually, we weren't from the same world. He saw me happily bickering and joking around with my classmates, showing a normal middle school student's youth and vitality and felt proud and happy so although he clearly came to find me, he didn't call out to me. He let me pass by in front of him and walk towards a world that was different to his.

3. A Broken Wing

Edison* said that success is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration. However, I feel that success is 10% inspiration, 30% luck and 60% perspiration. On the road that we have walked, quite a large number of people have inspiration and are also willing to work hard but fate does not look upon them with favour. Respected people are these who do not call out in pain or blame it on fate. They stay quiet, work hard, and continue. Fate will often take things away unsparingly, it can be as small as an opportunity, as big as one's health and it can even be life. We are unable to prevent fate from snatching things away from our hands, but we can choose to treasure those we have already obtained in life.
*[Thomas Edison]

In the harsh crackdown, because Little Six was usually arrogant and offended too many people, I don't know if it real or if someone around him had planned it, but, the news I heard was that because he was fighting over a woman, he disfigured a man. The way he disfigured him was very special. He used an eagle knife to slice the man's face open bit by bit. It was originally a long standing debt between them but someone reported it and the police took him into custody. Through investigation, they discovered his crimes of doing drugs, selling drugs and owning private weapons. With the crimes combined, he was sentenced to the death penalty, a small bullet ending a life.

Only later did I understand that this had nothing to do with anyone. The police had their eyes on Little Six from long ago. In the crackdown period, each department had a targeted task, they would definitely take down Little Six so any reports were only a cover up for this investigation.

The news of Little Six's death penalty flashed by on the news. I didn't even realise that it was Little Six (I didn't know his real name and his head was also shaved). Later, after hearing Brother Li's brothers discussing it did I realise that it was Little Six.

Little Six's gang members were completely extinguished but Zhang Jun was still in school. He didn't go to prison and the police stopped looking for him to talk, proving that he had peacefully passed through it all. However, Zhang Jun didn't look the slightest bit relaxed. During that period of time, he looked especially pale, everyday, his hair was messy as if he had just climbed out of bed. His clothes were also unkempt and he didn't look people straight in the eye.

He always seemed expressionless, no matter what happened, he always had an whatever attitude. It was the first time seeing him like this so it looks like this whole situation had a big impact on him.

However, none of our classmates knew his relationship to Little Six, rather, everyone was sure he was deep in grief over his break up.

Regarding Little Six's news, no one in the school followed it, his world was much too distant to theirs. The punks in the school were fond of discussing Chen Xun, because he participated in drug dealings, he was sentenced to three years of labour reform. Luckily he wasn't yet sixteen and his possession of drugs seized was very small or else the sentence would have been much worse.

For majority of the students in the year, it was their first time hearing about drugs in real life. When they discussed it in whispers, they all wore alarmed expressions.

Drugs! How distant, so distant that it seems like those only appear in gangster films and textbooks but there is actually a day when it appears near us, and is so close to us. This generation of young people see these things with disgust and hatred but also with curiosity and worship. In their minds, people like Chen Xun lived in another world and had the impulse and hot bloodedness that they didn't have, they were wanton and unrestrained.

Chen Xun became legendary and as Tong Yun Zhu was his girlfriend, she became the most legendary girl in the middle school department.

Wu Zei wasn't as lucky as Chen Xun. Although the amount of drugs was very small and he didn't have a record of dealing, doing or keeping drugs, but he was an adult and due to the harsh crackdown period, he was sentenced to ten years in prison.

When the sentence came out, Enchantress beat Xiao Bo like she had gone crazy. Xiao Bo stood there stupidly, letting her hit him and no one around tried to stop it. I tried to endure it for a long time but I wasn't able to so I charged over and pushed Enchantress to the side and stood in front of Xiao Bo. Enchantress wanted to keep hitting him but I pointed at her nose and said, "Try hitting him again. Xiao Bo's not the only one at fault, why aren't you hitting Brother Li?" I didn't finish speaking before Xiao Bo pushed me aside, hard enough to make me fall to the ground.

He walked in front of Enchantress as if he expected her to keep hitting him. However, Enchantress didn't keep hitting, instead, she knelt on the floor and started wailing loudly. I sat on the floor, also wanting to cry. Xiao Bo stared at Enchantress painfully for a while then left dragging his feet. I could only keep in my unhappiness, jump up and chase after him.

Brother Li opened his businesses again and everything went back to normal. However, the gentle Xiao Bo had completely changed.

In the past, he only smoked as a way of conversing but now, his addiction to smoking grew and grew and often, he would always have a cigarette in hand. Although he didn't talk much in the past, but he was still considered an open person. But now, he was so quiet it was scary.

Brother Li said to me, "Xiao Bo is the most delicate of us all and the one who values relations the most. When he was Year 4 or 5, Wu Zei took him out to play and because people shouted that he had no father, Wu Zei fought with them. He is more clear than anyone that Wu Zei going in alone is better than all three of us going in but he can't accept it emotionally. Wu Zei had reassured Xiao Bo that once the storm was over, he will behave well in jail and if we lobby a bit on the outside then his sentence will definitely be reduced. However, Xiao Bo just wasn't able to get past himself. He kept thinking that if he didn't have his mind all on studying at the time and attended to the place more, Wu Zei wouldn't have fallen into someone's trap."

Brother Li and I both couldn't do anything, we could only wait until he forgave himself.

Whenever I had time, I would go and pester him, getting him to treat me to eat and play with me. Xiao Bo's request to me was very simple, no matter how much I played or messed about, I definitely must get into a top high school.

For a period of time, I crazily revised for days and nights on end then walked into the high school entrance exam.

After the exam, I felt unrest, I felt like I could definitely get into high school but whether or not it was a top high school was up to fate. My maths and science were not bad but I was anxious over whether I'd be able to pass English. My English was very bad. In Year 1 and 2, because I was busy hating Treasure Bowl, I pretty much didn't study.

Brother Li helped me inquire about my results. Before the results were released, they already knew that I was accepted into No. 1's high school department. While my parents were still anxiously waiting for my results, I was already celebrating.

Brother Li helped me hold a lavish celebration. Actually, celebrating was secondary, what was important was making Xiao Bo happy. I didn't know most of the people who came and I felt uncomfortable inside, Wu Zei and Enchantress who should have came, didn't come. No matter how many of these people who shouldn't have come came, how much they laughed, they couldn't cover my sadness.

Xiao Bo would toast at everyone he saw, he was so happy it seemed as if he had gotten into university. I didn't know how much he drank exactly that night, I only remember that everyone collapsed from having too much to drink. Brother Li drank until he cried and he slurred to Xiao Bo, "Brother is sorry to you." Xiao Bo didn't cry but he kept puking, after he finished puking, he'd continue drinking. I didn't drink a drop yet I seemed like I was drunk. I kept crying non stop but I didn't know what I was crying about.

The day our results were released, my mom dragged me to see the results board early in the morning.

We first looked at the red board on the left to see if I had been accepted by No. 1. I looked along with my mom but while she searched for my name, I was looking for Zhang Jun's name.

I first found Guan He's name. She was placed at number fifty. I was speechless, among the future high school department's students, she wasn't even able to place in the top ten. I continued to look down and actually found Zhang Jun's name in the 200's. I stared at it in surprise for a while. After so many things happening, I was worried he wouldn't be able to get into a top high school but it turns out that not only did he get in, he did better than me.

My mom finally found my name and excitedly pointed at my name, shouting loudly: "Qi Qi! You! You! Here!"

The parents around us were all happy for us and all said, "Congratulations, congratulations!"

I stared at my name, not wanting to say anything. Placed 300 from the top and 50 from the bottom, I dangerously squeezed into No. 1. What was there to be happy about?

My mom didn't care about the numbers though, she only cared that I got into No. 1. She excitedly pulled me along, "Let's go phone your dad, we'll go out for dinner tonight."

Because my mom grew up with her stepfather, she lived a hard life and grew used to living frugally. She pretty much never went out to eat and her favourite phrase was, "It's unsanitary outside." It seems like she was truly happy today, she completely didn't care about how 'unsanitary' it is outside.

I suddenly remembered Li Shan, Song Chen and the others. I pulled my mom to the board on the right, "I want to see the results of the others."

Ever since Xiao Bo came back, I had become distant from Guan He, Song Chen and the others. I didn't even attend our class' graduation party.

I looked for their names one by one on the board. Luckily, all of them got into high school.

Mom asked me, "Did you find your classmates' results? How did they do?"

"Pretty good, two of them got into top high schools and one of them is probably in a normal high school."

My mom laughed, "That's good. Let's go, let's go give your dad a call."

"I don't want to go out to eat. If you're happy then cook some nice food. Later I want to go find a classmate." Just as I was talking, I saw Guan He and her mom squeezing through the crowd. I immediately shouted out, "Guan He, Guan He."

Guan He held her mom's hand, wanting to squeeze over but there were just too many people so I dragged my mom over. Guan He's mom was very thin and looked rather old but her expression had the vigour of a young person. She grumbled at Guan He, "I told you earlier that we should come earlier, see, now we can't even squeeze to the front."

I smiled, "Does auntie even need to worry about Guan He's results? I just had a look and she's ranked 50 on the list accepted into No. 1."

When my mom heard, she started chatting very warmly with Guan He's mom. However, her mom wasn't very pleased and through her tone, it seemed like she didn't think Guan He's results were good enough.

My mom immediately shared the gossip she had just heard in the crowd to Guan He's mom, "This time, No. 1's high school entrance results aren't very good. I heard that overall, the results are ranked last of all the key middle schools. Of the top 10 people accepted into the high school department, not one is from No. 1. Just then, a few parents were talking about how this is the worst graduating class in No.1's history. I really don't know how these teachers are teaching."

Guan He's mom immediately agreed, "That's right, all these children are being held up by them......"

Guan He pulled her tongue at me and smiled, "How about you?"

"I squeezed into the gates of No. 1 with force."

My mom and her mom were chatting enthusiastically, regretting not having met earlier.

The two of us decided to ditch them and ran to the shade off in the distance to chat.

Guan He suddenly asked, "What rank is Zhang Jun in No.1's acceptance list?"

I was surprised inside but I indifferently said, "I didn't pay too much attention, I think its in the two three hundreds. How did you know that he'd definitely get into No. 1?"

"Later your mind wasn't on school at all so you didn't notice. Later on he tried so hard! It was as if the person had changed. During self study, he couldn't concentrate because of the people in his class so he actually beat them up behind the classroom. He even cracked a chair. In the other slow classes, the closer they got to exams, the more restless they became but his class was the exact opposite, the closer they got, the more attentive they were, just because Zhang Jun wanted to concentrate on revising."

I became quiet. Suddenly, I felt a bit regretful that I listened to Xiao Bo and applied to No. 1. I should have gone to another middle school.

Guan He asked, "What plans do you have for summer? Are you going somewhere to play? Li Shan said that as long as he got into No. 1, his dad will take him to Hang Zhou for a vacation. Wang Hao's parents are taking him back to their home town and Zhang Jun this rich guy, went back to Shanghai as soon as he finished his exams. How about you? Are your parents giving you any rewards?"

"I'm not going anywhere. How about you?"

Guan He smiled, "Even if I wanted to go somewhere, I can't. I can only stay at home obediently and help mom with housework."

I said, "Wait till you graduate from high school. When you make your own money to spend, you can go wherever you want to play."

Guan He smiled, "There's still 7 years."

Amongst us all, she was probably the one who wished that time would fly by so that she could grow up the most, whereas I was probably the only one who didn't want to move forward, I wanted time to move backwards.

If Xiao Fei could come back, if Wu Zei could not go to jail, if Xiao Bo could successfully participate in the gaokao...... There were too many ifs but time is only an arrow shot only after a bow is drawn, it can only go forwards, not back.

We chatted for a long time but No. 1's school gates were still filled with gates. Lin Lan squeezed out from the crowd and saw me. She waved at me beaming and seeing there were no cars, ran over, "Luo Qi Qi, I saw that you got into No. 1. Congratulations."

Only then did I remember, I didn't seem to see her name on the board and asked, "Don't you plan on going to No. 1? Which school are you going to?"

She smiled, "I applied for a technical school. I don't plan on going to high school."

Guan He and I were both dazed. In previous years, technical schools were still quite popular but now, going to technical school wasn't considered as a very good plan. Your grades needed to be very good, their requirements were higher than getting into the key high schools yet when you graduate, you can't compare to a university student so as long as students didn't have any hardships, they wouldn't choose technical schools.

I really couldn't resist any more and asked, "With your grades, you can definitely get into university, why do you need to go to technical school?"

Lin Lan looked at Guan He and smiled, "It's not like I'm the only one with good grades that is going to technical school. Shen Yuan Zhe's little sister, Shen Yuan Si is also going."

Guan He felt her mood and said to me, "My mom's still waiting for me. I'm going home first." She then politely said "goodbye" to Lin Lan and left.

Lin Lan looked at her walked off and the smile on her face, "I have no energy to study any more, I'm too tired. It's not the pressure from studying but other factors. I want to leave home early and leave this place. Perhaps after a few years, I'll forget about everything."

Li Lan was a proud girl. In the first year of middle school, she imagined she was going to be a beautiful university student at a top university and fly freely in the outside world, but now, before she has even flown, her wings have been restrained.

Does her mom realise that because of her, her daughter has completely changed her life orbit? She should probably know, just like how every family that fights for divorce knows that their child's slipping grades are because of them.

Lin Lan has already tried.

Lin Lan quietly looked at No. 1. Perhaps she was sighing she would never know what the distinguished No. 1 high school department is like. I quietly looked afar, in the blue sky, there were white birds flying. Under the sky, there were fresh flowers looming. The colours of summer are always exceptionally bright but this was a season of sadness.

"Lin Lan."

On the other side of the road, someone called for her. It was Lin Lan's mom who was dressed up fashionably. She didn't look at all like she had a daughter of Lin Lan's age. Beside her stood a young man with an outstanding deposition.

Around them, there were always people secretly staring at them. I also couldn't resist staring. Lin Lan was very sensitive about these things and could immediately sense it. I quickly apologised, "Sorry."

While she waved enthusiastically at her mom, she smiled, "It's nothing. I really hate her, but she's my mom. If even I don't defend her then there won't be anyone in this world who will." She bid farewell to me, "I'm going now, bye!"

She ran towards her mom and in my heart, I quietly said, "Goodbye!"

Watching her silhouette disappear into the distance, I truly felt that my middle school life has come to an end.

Back when I graduated from primary, I looked forward to going to No. 1. I always felt that three years were going to go slowly but I didn't realise it would go by with the blink of an eye. But with the blink of an eye, too many things had happened.

The first friend I made, Lin Lan, went to technical school; my best friend Xiao Fei, disappeared with a trace. They were one of the best students but yet they didn't go to high school whereas trash like Zhang Jun and I got into high school.

I slowly strolled to the karaoke bar. Xiao Bo was sitting outside the bar in the shelter of the willow tree. When he saw me, he smiled.

I saw beside him and leaned on his shoulder. He smoked on his cigarette and asked, "Very sad?"

I didn't reply. He smiled, "When I graduated from third year of middle school and finished looking at the results board, I also felt empty inside. The students I was close to were all ones who didn't study well. I was the only one out of them who got into high school."

"Take me out for some air."

Xiao Bo threw away his cigarette and went in to get his keys and the helmets. I hugged his waist and rested my head on his back, listening to the roar of the motorbike on the road. He rode faster and faster as if he could keep speeding up. After a long time, the bike stopped. I opened my eyes and discovered that we had stopped by the riverside. He took off his helmet, "Let's go over and sit for a while."

We sat by the riverside. Xiao Bo looked at the river water as if he was pondering over something. I picked up a willow branch and hit at the water while trying to talk as casually as I could, "Where do you plan on doing the gaokao next year?"

He lit a cigarette and slowly smoked, "Getting into university has always been my dream or, becoming an intellectual. It's been my dream to surpass the environment I was born and grew up in. Although I drink, smoke and fight like other hooligans, in my heard, I was certain that I was not the same as them. When Wu Zei became brothers with Brother Li and got tattoos because Brother Li had them, I determinedly refused because I was going to be a university student in the future so I shouldn't do these unclean things."

"You'll definitely get into university."

"Right now, my thoughts have changed. I don't want to go to university any more. Wu Zei's parents are small businesspeople with a fixed income and his little brother is still studying. Brother Li's business needs people. Before, when we opened our first small ship, us three brothers said that we'll venture out into the world together. Today, there's only two of us left but we'll still venture out into the world together." He smiled deeper and flicked his cigarette, "There are too many things to do at hand, I really don't have the time to go to university for four years."

I tried to be calm, "If you don't want to go, then don't. Being a university student isn't something rare anyway." Even I felt that my words were fake. In the 90's, universities haven't expanded yet so they were extremely hard to get into. University students were still very treasured and respected, not like now where university students were bought like cabbages.

"Do you know why it's so hard to surpass the environment you live in? It's not that you don't try hard, it's because your seven human emotions is destined to be influenced by the people and environment around you. That's why people say, 'hang around good people to become a good person, hang around bad people to become a bad person'."

I quickly said, "If you're a bad person because you don't go to university, then there's way too many bad people in this world."

Xiao Bo smiled and threw his cigarette in the water. He pulled me up and we got on the motorbike.

After riding for a while, he pulled the bike to a stop in front of a small shop selling toys and took me in. When the person inside saw him, they immediately smiled in welcome, "How does Brother Xiao Bo have the time to come today?"

Xiao Bo smiled, "Ah Jian, I want you to help me ink a tattoo."

Ah Jian smiled, "No problem." He turned inside to get a photo album and put it on the table. He flipped through page by page, introducing each one as he showed Xiao Bo, "What kind of picture does Brother Xiao Bo want? A beast of prey or a bird of prey?"

Xiao Bo flipped through a few pages and didn't seem too satisfied. He looked at me, "Qi Qi, help me draw one."

I felt so overwhelmingly uncomfortable inside, he was using this method to bid farewell to his past self, he was using a tattoo that can never be erased to always remind himself of his status.

"Why must it be a tattoo? The pictures all don't look good, plus I've been learning art so sloppily, apart from being able to draw a lotus flower, I can't draw anything else."

Xiao Bo smiled, "I must have one. Qi Qi, no matter how your drawing skills are, I only want you to help me create one."

I finally nodded silently. He smiled and said to Ah Jian, "Wait till we get the picture ready and then we'll come find you. I want to get it inked in my shop, later you can prepare your tools and come."

Ah Jian naturally was full of agreement.

Under Xiao Bo's urges, I started drawing. Considering that Xiao Bo was born in the year of the dragon, I spent three days time to collect pictures of Chinese dragons and western fire dragons. I drew a long dragon with wings that was riding the clouds and mounting the mist. However, the dragon's wings were tacked with a sword. The clouds around the dragon were all stained with red.

When Ah Jian saw the picture, he cautiously said, "The picture is very big. I'm afraid we'll have to break it up into many parts to finish or else your body won't be able to handle it."

Xiao Bo laid on the bed and said, "I'm not in a rush, you can take your time."

I sad on the sofa on the side and stared at Ah Jian. When he was cleaning Xiao Bo's back, ready to start inking, I wanted to leave but Xiao Bo called out to me, "Qi Qi, stay with me."

I walked back and carried a little chair over. I sat in front of him and asked, "Does it hurt?"

"A little."

I grasped his hand and he closed his eyes. I silently watched the picture develop bit by bit on his back.

When I was creating the picture, Xiao Bo was impatient and seemed as if he wanted to get the tattoo immediately but when it was being inked, he wasn't the slightest bit impatient. Sometimes, even though some more could be inked on, he would tell Ah Jian to pack up and continue tomorrow.

Because Ah Jian was being paid by the day, he was happy to ink for more days but even with the slow speed, after a month, the tattoo was completed.

Ah Jian looked at the dragon on Xiao Bo's back with a sense of accomplishment, "I started inking tattoos when I was sixteen but up to now, this is my best work."

Xiao Bo asked me, "Qi Qi, what do you think?"

"Very good."

Ah Jian asked Xiao Bo with anticipation, "Do you want to find a big mirror to have a look?"

Xiao Bo stood up and put on his clothes as he talked, "Later all I have is time, I'll look at it slowly."

He took me to eat lamb skewers. After eating lamb skewers, the sun was already setting. We slowly walked along the boulevard when he suddenly said, "Qi Qi, let's break off relations!"

I suspected I heard wrong and looked at him in astonishment. He smiled, "Let's break off relations. In the future, we'll never be friends again and we'll never meet."

With the red glow of the setting sun and the sweet scent of the flowers, with his warm smile, it seemed like the countless summer sunsets we saw together in the past. I laughed and hit him, "You're crazy!"

He smiled and opened his arms, "Do you want one last hug?"

I laughed, "So it turns out you were looking for an excuse huh? I'm not hugging you!"

He rejected my decline. He pulled me into his arms and hugged me tightly. I laughed and also hugged him. Inside, I was quietly saying, "Everything will be better, everything will be better."

After a long, long time, he let me go and smiled, "I'll send you home."

I punched him with a laugh, "Next time you go crazy, find a better excuse."

We laughed and walked along like normal. When there was a bit of distance left till my house, he stopped. I waved at him, "I'll come find you tomorrow."

He looked at me under the glow of the setting sun and quietly smiled.

I started running and when I was about to turn, I turned back to wave at him again. I wasn't able to see his expression, I could only see his long body bathed in the orange glow.

The next day, I went to the karaoke bar to find Xiao Bo. The person inside told me, "Brother Xiao Bo no longer manages the karaoke bar. He's gone to manage some other business."

"Then where is he now?"

"I don't know."

I glared at him, refusing to believe his words. He apologised, "Brother Xiao Bo told me to tell you that he no longer wants to see you. He says that you shouldn't come back again. In the future, you are not permitted to enter any all businesses managed by Brother Xiao Bo."

I asked loudly, "Did you get it wrong? I'm Luo Qi Qi!"

He only looked at me with a sympathetic expression, like looking at girls who refuse to accept reality when their boyfriends suddenly disappeared. My pride was injured. I turned and left.

As I walked, the scene from yesterday replayed in my mind. I suddenly started shaking all over and knelt on the floor, Xiao Bo wasn't joking! He really wanted to break off relations with me!

But why? What did I do wrong?

I rode my bicycle to 'Across the Water'. When the person managing the door saw me, he refused me entry. I pushed back, wanting to force my way in but I was pushed to the ground and warned that if I wanted to continue creating a scene, they would notify my parents and the school.

People walking by all looked at me. Tears started forming in my eyes but I suppressed it and stood back up. I hid in a corner and sat on the floor waiting.

When the sky was about to turn dark, I saw a familiar motorbike drive over. I immediately ran over but I was blocked by someone. I loudly shouted, "Xu Xiao Bo, talk everything out. What wrong did I do to you exactly?"

Xiao Bo didn't even turn his head. He handed his motorbike to someone and walked into the dance hall while taking off his helmet.

I finally couldn't suppress it any more, the tears came gushing out.

Brother Li's car stopped on the side. He rolled down the window and ordered the person blocking me to let go.

"Qi Qi, in the future, don't come looking for us again. You know Xiao Bo's personality well. As soon as he sets his mind on something, he won't turn back. In the future, as long as it's our business, you won't be allowed to enter it."

Brother Li started rolling his window back up and gestured at the driver to drive. I cried out, "Why?"

"Qi Qi, you're not on the same road as us. You have your own path to walk down."

The window closed and Brother Li's car drove off.

I couldn't stop crying. I'm not on the same path as you? Then with who am I on the same road with? I moved to this city when I was seven, I met you guys when I was nine. Six years have gone by, Xiao Bo's taken me to pretty much all the places in this city on his bicycle, pretty much all the memories I have in this city are related to you all. Now you're telling me that I'm not on the same road as you!

I didn't go look for Xiao Bo again because I knew that when he said to break up relations, he'll definitely break the relations. Even if I die crying in front of his eyes, he won't give me another look, just like how back in the year by the pond, when he was memorising English, no matter how much commotion I caused, he ignored me just like he said he would.

After Xiao Bo and I broke relations, I suddenly became someone with no friends and nowhere to go.

At home, little sister practised on her keyboard everyday. I thought she was noisy, she thought that I was disturbing her by being at home. I told her to close the door when she practised and she impatiently replied, "It's so hot, if I close the door, won't I die from the heat? Why don't you go out to find friends to play with?

It turns out that because I often wasn't home, this house was already not used to my existence. I could only put on my shoes and leave.

I used my pocket money to buy a packet of cigarettes and sat by the riverside smoking.

The water in the river was exactly the same as before but everything had changed.

Under the bright sun, I smoked one cigarette after the other. I remembered back to how one year ago, I was still cuddled up on the sofa with Xiao Fei discussing the future, discussing whether Qinghua was better or the University of Beijing; I accompanied Xiao Bo to the lotus pond early every morning to memorise English and revise together.

It felt distant and unrealistic but, it was actually only a year ago. Why in the short space of a year, the whole world is unrecognisable?

Thinking about the three long years of high school, I suddenly felt very tired and started to really understand Lin Lan's decision to go to technical school. Because she was tired and unable to support herself any further, she wanted to quickly end it and give herself a result.

I sat by the riverside one day after the other, smoking one packet of cigarettes after the other until I came to a decision.

At night, after dinner, I told my mom and dad, "Don't go out to dance just yet. After I finish washing the dishes, I want to discuss something with you."

My seriousness made my mom and dad became serious as well. They sat on the sofa and asked a bit nervously, "What's the matter? Talk directly, you can do the dishes later."

"I don't want to go to high school."

Dad's face instantly changed colour. Mum pressed on his arm, hinting that he shouldn't get impatient then looked at me and asked, "Why?"

"There's no why, I just don't want to keep studying. I want to enter the workforce earlier. I can go to technical school, I definitely can get in, after two years, I'll be able to start work."

Dad's face turned green, "Although our family isn't wealthy, we don't expect you to earn money to support the family. No matter if you want to keep studying or not, you have to go to high school."

I lightly said, "If you force me to go to high school, I can only go. You're the parents and I'm the daughter so I can't not listen. But if you let me go take the exam to get into technical school now, I can get into a better profession. If you don't agree, after a few years, I probably won't even be able to get into technical school."

Dad stood up violently and raised his fish. Mom hurriedly held him back and pushed him out, "Go out first, I'll talk to Qi Qi privately."

Mom sat beside me. I looked at her silently, icily thinking that she wouldn't have any way to make me change my mind.

She thought for a long while before she started to speak, "I know that all this time, you've been carrying resentment at us inside for sending you off to your grandpa's. You've also been thinking that we're biased and treat your little sister better but I gave birth to both of you. Inside, your dad and I treat you both the same. It's just that your little sister is more lively and can speak better so we naturally communicate more with her; on the other hand, you're rather quiet and refuse to tell us anything so naturally we talk less to you. Think about it yourself, did mom say anything wrong? Everyday when we eat together, your little sister will always tell us about things that happened at school whereas you don't say anything. We ask you and want to talk to you but you always end it with a 'nothing much'."

I was silent, could it be that I was born with this quiet and weird personality?

"Actually, your dad and I haven't worried any less about you than your little sister. When your little sister does something wrong, we can just shout at her and she'll cry but the next day, she'll be fine again, she'll never distance herself from us. But you? You're stubborn and obstinate. We fear that if we say too much, you'll rebel but we worry if we don't say anything." Mom's eyes turned red.

Actually, I understood the reason, it wasn't that they didn't love me. If they didn't love me, they'd let me go directly to technical school since it saves money and energy so why would they try and force me to go to high school? However, on the smaller things, they will unconsciously be biased but there are no parents in this world who will admit to being biased. They feel that those are irrelevant trifles but what they don't know is that a child's world is formed by these countless trifles.

"Your grandpa and grandma both came from big families. Your grandma went to a foreign school and knows English, your grandpa is a famous engineer but both their daughters did not receive higher education. For me, it was because my stepfather refused to pay for the education, for your auntie, it was because she didn't get along with her stepmother and taking advantage of your grandpa going away on business, secretly went and applied for a job. This had become a lifetime of pain for your grandpa. When you hear our names, you'll know that your grandpa had high hopes for us but we let him down. He put his hopes on you and before he passed away, he specially left twenty thousand dollars for you, saying that it was for your university fees. He told me to make sure I get you into university and he also that if you get into university, you have to remember to go to his grave to visit him."

No one has talked about my grandpa to me in a long time. My tears started falling uncontrollably.

"Twenty thousand dollars isn't a small sum even now so what about back then? When your grandpa was very sick, your step grandma used the opportunity to hide away all the family's savings. Your grandpa has lived a very rough life and your auntie and I didn't want him to witness the family disputing over inheritance before he passed away so we told him that we already received the money. Your auntie renounced the half of the estate that she inherited and only got your grandpa's artworks and books. I only received his handwritten copy of 'The Heave Sword and Dragon Sabre'. Talking about these sad things made her also start crying, "Don't bear a grudge against your step grandma, she doesn't have any children so she has a very firm grasp on money. Your auntie and I both don't bear any grudges towards her. Although your dad and I don't earn much money, as long as you can get in, we'll do everything we can to provide for you. You just need to remember your grandpa's piece of heart."

Mom wiped her tears, "Although your grandpa really wanted you to go to university, I won't force you. You're not young any more, you're fifteen now. At your age, I had already started working at a factory for a year and your father was unloading coal on the railway to earn money for his school fees. I believe that you will be able to think it through yourself and make a decision. If you still decide to go to technical school, I will persuade your father to agree to let you go. In the future, I will go to your grandpa's grave and explain to him that it was I who was incapable as a mother who let him down and that it has nothing to do with you."

Mom cried soundlessly and I also cried till I couldn't breathe.

Mom waited until her emotions calmed down before continuing, "I'll give you three days to think about it. After you think it through properly, give us an answer."

I went back to my room and lay on the bed hugging 'The Heaven Sword and Dragon Sabre', the tears still dropping uncontrollably.

I thought about it for the entire night, grandpa's face and voice floating in my mind the entire time.

Actually, I understood my mom's strategy of retreating with her last few words were used to excite me, it wish grandpa's wish. It was the only thing filial thing I can do for him.

The next morning, I went into my parent's bedroom and said to them, "I've decided to go to high school."

Mom and dad both let out a breath of relief. Dad immediately went and got a ballpoint pen from inside the drawer and gave it to me, "This pen is very precious, I left it specially for you. Your mom and I have discussed it already and no matter how you do at school, it's fine as long as you are proud of yourself. We don't request for you to get into university."

There were two lines of golds written on the pen: hard work is the boat to the endless sea of learning and diligence is the path to the mountain of knowledge.

I grasped the pen in my hand, "Since I chose to go to high school, I'll definitely get into university. I want to ask for a request."

"Say it."

"I want to pass through high school through my own methods. I want to ask you guys to believe in me and give me freedom."

Dad looked at mom, mom spoke, "No problem. We've believed in you all along. Plus, your dad and I don't restrict you anyway. Look at the neighbours in this building, who raises their daughter like we do to you? I don't even let your little sister come home after ten but you play outside until eleven. The most we can do is give you a warning. Actually, your dad has been raising you like a boy and is reluctant to control your temper."

Dad spoke, "When I was thirteen, I started studying whilst working. I believe that my daughter has the ability to be responsible for herself."

I nodded, turned and left their room. Although the knot inside my heart has been untied, the barrier between us, formed through the years, is still unable to disappear. I probably won't ever be able to be like little sister, hugging dad's neck, lying spoilt in mom's arms, but......this is enough.

The willow trees by the riverside were green and lush, the early morning air was cool with moist, and the air was fragrant with the smell of grass.

I sat by the river, took off my shoes and dipped my feet into the water.

I closed my eyes, all my memories seemed to be in front of my eyes.

At 5, I left grandpa and went back to my parent's side.

At 6, I started school and also left school.

At 7, I resumed school and met Xiao Fei.

At 8, I moved to this city and met Zhang Jun.

At 9, I head butted with Teacher Zhang, skipped school to go to the game house and met Xiao Bo.

At 10, I was desk mates with Chen Jing and met Teacher Gao.

At 11, Guan He transferred to our class.

At 12, I was reunited with Xiao Fei and met Teacher Ceng Hong.

......

I once thought that this world gave me too little but when I really calmed my mind down to think, did I really receive too little?

Xiao Fei's dad hits her mom, she faced family violence; Guan He's dad passed away long ago, Guan He needs to depend on others and behave well to her stepfather, brother and sister; Xiao Bo's dad passed away early, his mom is mentally unstable and they aren't well off; although Lin Lan still has both her parents, she needed to awkwardly face her mom's new marriage and endure the gossip; Chen Song Qing studied hard but because of his family's financial state, needed to carry the heavy burden of the family.

They are all strong and continue to smile, what about me?

Mom and dad have a harmonious relationship and are enduring of me, I also have a grandpa who loves me so much. Although in my younger years, I lacked parental love, but I have precious memories of being together with grandpa. Little sister will never know how refined and gentle our grandpa is. She has what I don't have, but I also have what she doesn't have.

During primary, I didn't have any classmates and was isolated by the whole class, but because I was isolated, I got to know Xiao Bei, Wu Zei and the others. What Xiao Bo gave me is more than what a thousand classmates could give.

Although I met Teacher Zhang, I also met Teacher Gao who cared about me; although I met the selfish Treasure Bowl, I also got to meet the cool Ceng Hong.

What reason did I have to detest the world? What reason did I have to give up on myself?

I threw all my remaining cigarettes into the river and watched them flow away with the water.

I stood up, a completely new start wasn't just for myself but for grandpa, my parents, Xiao Bo, Xiao Fei, Teacher Gao, Ceng Hong......A person doesn't live just for themselves, they also live for everyone who loves them.