I thought I was done with this book and then you show up again.

Can't you just leave me alone already? I didn't ask for this. I didn't ask for you.

               • Onto the Chapter •

I wonder if she knows I can hear her crying in the room over. I wonder if she realizes I know about the drugs and the lies.

I wonder about all the times she's lied about it.

I wonder if she knows that I realize it's been a lie this whole time.

I wonder if she hurts as much as I do, or if she's just crying because she ran out.

I wonder if she realizes I'm crying.

I wonder why.

I wonder if she realizes she's part of this sleepless night.

I wonder and I ponder and I hurt but none of this will ever stop.

But no matter how many times I wonder,'I can't ever seem to get an answer.

No matter how many times I've prayed it hasn't stopped.

No matter how many times tears have hit the pillow, my throat still burns with sorrowful tears.

She asked me if I was smoking weed since my room smelled a bit off. I can't figure out where it's coming from, but I can't stop thinking about what would have happened if I had asked her if she had been. Or if it was something else.