Three weeks after I kicked Corden out of my life for good, I made things official with Archer.

He gave me no reason to refuse him. The man is infuriatingly charming, and he treats me how I deserve to be treated. Everything I would want in a man Archer embodies, so why shouldn't I date him? Comparing him to a man who I would never be able to date in real life isn't going to help. Was I feeling petty after that night Corden screwed me over? Yes. Did I head over to Archer's later that night to fuck him? Yes. However, I genuinely want things to work with him. He is who I should be with. Not Corden.

Over the past few weeks, we've gone out every weekend for dinner, and sometimes I'll go to his house to end the night with sex, but I don't ever sleep over. Regardless of whether or not we're dating, this is still new, and becoming domesticated is terrifying to me. Archer knows this and claims he's perfectly fine with taking things slow, so for now, I'm seeing how things go.

I'm waiting for the right time to tell him about my second job, but it never seems to come. If things transform into something serious between us, maybe then I'll tell him, but even if I share this secret with Archer, it's not like he can know where I dance. The Harbor isn't a place for cops.

"Where'd you go?" Archer brings me back to the present, running his thumb over the back of my hand. He's sweet enough to the point that it's almost painful. Every time he looks at me, I can see how much he adores me, and zoning out during dinner isn't exactly reciprocating those feelings.

"Sorry." I shake my head, attempting to clear my thoughts. "How was the older woman you helped the other day? You checked in on her, right?"

Archer launches into a story about the woman he helped rescue from a car accident, ever the hometown hero. I cling to his every word until a flicker of movement catches my eye in the corner of the restaurant. A man wearing sunglasses spilled his drink, but his gaze never leaves mine.

Is he part of the security Corden hired? He said I wouldn't notice them, but whoever this man is, he's not making watching me very discreet. The waiter comes over to help clean up the mess, and then the man winks at me, flashing a row of broken, chipped teeth.

A cold chill runs through my body.

"Carmen." Archer glances over his shoulder, and the man quickly looks away. "What's going on? Are you alright?"

No, I'm not alright. I have no idea who is dangerous and who isn't. Corden and I haven't been seen with each other in weeks, but the threats I was warned against could still be out there, right? 

And because I have no information and Corden refused to let me in on the details of what exactly he does for a living, I'm forced to be out at a restaurant with my boyfriend utterly terrified that the man three tables over is plotting my kidnapping.

I become infuriated all over again.

"I'm...not feeling well," I lie. "My stomach is off."

"Oh." Archer furrows his brows before he searches the room for the waiter. "You should have told me sooner, sweetheart. I'll grab the check right now."

The second after Archer's card is returned to him, he rises from the chair and helps escort me out of mine. With a hand on my lower back, he leads me towards the exit, where we unfortunately have to pass by the man with sunglasses. I keep my head down, unsure whether or not he's here to protect or endanger me, but thankfully, we pass by him without trouble. I hear the man ask for the check before we exit onto the busy street, breathing a sigh of relief when the air hits my face.

"Let me call you a cab. I'll take you home."

"I'd, um... I'd rather walk," I reply, shifting awkwardly in my heels. I only live three blocks from here, but I can't go home yet. Not until I know for certain nobody is following me. I'm not going to risk Riley becoming part of their hitlist.

"Okay, I'll walk you home, then."

"Arch." I place a hand on his arm and give it a squeeze. "I appreciate the offer, but you live all the way across town. I live three blocks away. I'll be fine."

And I don't want to risk his safety, either.

"Are you sure? I don't want you walking home by yourself."

I hold up my set of keys where the pepper spray and pocket knife clink together. "I'm capable of handling myself. Plus, it's not dark outside yet. The sun is just starting to set. If I leave now, I'll make it home before it gets dark." I'm trying my best not to look over my shoulder to see if the man is watching our interaction, but it's difficult. I can feel myself being stalked, and the terror of that courses through my veins, itching for me to take action and to flee the scene as soon as possible.

After another few seconds of contemplation, Archer sighs in defeat and kisses my forehead like the perfect boyfriend he is. It's a sweet gesture, so I give him a quick kiss on the lips as a form of reassurance. "You'll call me as soon as you get there?"

"Promise."

"Alright. I had fun tonight, Carmen. I hope you feel better."

"Thanks. Me too. I'll see you."

I start walking in the opposite direction of home. If there is someone following me, I'll try to confuse them and lose their trail before I call a cab to bring me back to Riley and I's apartment. It's not the smartest plan in the world, but it's the only option I'm comfortable with. It's a plan where the people I care about will have guaranteed protection.

Picking up my speed, my heels clatter on the cement. Plenty of people are out and about with the dinner rush, so I at least feel comfortable enough to know that someone wouldn't kidnap me in broad daylight. However, if they're trying to gain insight as to where I live, that could present future problems down the road that I don't need or want.

God, when did I become a person who constantly has to look over her shoulder? I should curse Corden for ever bringing me into this mess to begin with, and yet...I don't regret meeting him. I don't regret feeling alive in those short, fleeting moments we spent together. Even after three more weeks of silence, I still think about his lips on mine. I'm not sure if I'll ever stop.

He's fucked me up for life.

When I'm two blocks over, I spare a glance behind me, but I don't see the man in sunglasses anymore. He could be hidden amongst the crowd, but at this point I think I'm—

A calloused hand closes over my mouth and pulls me backwards into an alley before I can finish my thought. My body instinctively goes into fight-or-flight mode, and I attempt to kick and thrash my way out of their hold, but their grip grows stronger, holding me to them. "Hadari, it's me."

Corden spins me around, his eyes frantic as he scans me from head-to-toe. I've only seen him this unruly when he pulled the gun on the man who threatened me, but this time, there's an added level of panic sprawled across his features. "Are you alright? Did he touch you?"

I'm too in shock to process what he's saying. I'm too in shock that he's here standing right in front of me three weeks later as if nothing happened between us. As if I didn't tell him to never show his face around me again.

How dare he?

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I seethe. "Didn't I tell you to stay the hell away from me?"

"Yes, but I..." He rakes a hand through his hair. "My security called and said you were being followed. I got here as soon as I could, but it took me longer than I anticipated to find you. They handled it, but—"

"I don't need to be rescued, Corden! You saw me handle myself the first time. When I told you to stay away, I meant it. As you can see, I'm fine. Now let me call a cab so I can go the hell home."

Corden dips his gaze down to my outfit, and it's as if he's finally seeing me for the first time today after coming out of his state of panic. I'm wearing a purple, flowy mini dress with a pair of low-wedge white heels, and my hair is held back by a white headwrap. "Fuck, you look beautiful."

I cross my arms over my chest and huff out a breath of frustration, but it does nothing to stop the eruption of butterflies taking flight in my stomach. He shouldn't affect me like this. I shouldn't crave for him to press his lips to mine again, but right now, it's all I want.

The space in the alley doesn't give us a lot of room, so his chest is almost pressed against mine. It seems as if he left whatever the hell he was doing in a hurry, because rather than being completely put together, his hair is undone, and he's only wearing a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. Aside from that night spent in his home, I've never seen him so underdressed.

"I'm sorry," he whispers. "I just needed to see for myself that you're alright."

Dammit.

I will not cry!

"Well, you need to stop," I sneer. "Honestly, Corden, what gives? You push me away only to come right back into my life. I don't get it. You won't let me in, and whatever, that's fine. I've accepted it. But it doesn't give you the right to pop up and turn my life upside down when it caters to you. We both agreed to part ways, and we need to stick to that."

He nods like he knows I'm right. "I know, I know. Trust me, I know, but I... Fuck, Hadari. It's easier said than done."

My stupid, naive heart pitter-patters with a shred of hope. "Have you changed your mind, then? Are you willing to open up about what the hell you've gotten me into?"

The silence that follows my question is all I need to slice through the hope. He's not changing his mind, and I'm not going to sit around any longer and mope about someone who I will never be able to be with.

"Right." I clear my throat, blinking away tears. As much as I want to cry, I will never do it in front of him. "Well, consider this my final warning, Corden. I don't want you around me under any circumstance. I don't care if I'm in danger. I don't care if your security calls you. Your security team handled the threat tonight just fine, I'm assuming since I'm still alive and breathing, so why don't you put your trust in them and take their word for it when they say they've got it handled? Quit doing this. It's only going to hurt us both in the long run."

The shrill of my ringtone causes me to flinch. Archer is probably wondering if I made it home safely, but I make no moves to answer it. I don't trust Corden enough for him to know his name, or anything about him for that matter.

"You can answer that if you need to," he says.

"It's my boyfriend," I reply. "I'll call him after you leave."

Corden's jaw flickers once before he says, "Boyfriend? You're official now?"

Why the hell does it feel so hard to respond? It's a simple answer, but it feels wrong when I tell him yes.

"Alright, then." A sigh of resignation leaves his mouth, and the sound of it crushes that sliver of hope I was holding onto into nothing but dust. "You're taken, and I'll respect that. As difficult as it'll be, even if you're in danger, I won't bother you again if that's what you wish."

"Perfect." My voice is foreign. I don't recognize it as my own through the bone-crushing, all-consuming weight that's slammed down suddenly on my chest. Telling him I want him to keep checking in on me would be pointless. He'll never tell me what he does for a living, so what's the point? I can't be with someone if there will never be trust there. I can't blame him for being secretive, as I'm sure he has good reason, but if he truly doesn't anticipate telling me the truth then he needs to leave me alone and allow me to move on with someone else.

It's the right thing to do, but again, why does it feel so wrong?

"Take care of yourself, alright?" Pain emanates from his eyes, and I have to force myself to look away from him. I don't trust myself to speak without becoming a blubbering mess, so I jerk my chin to acknowledge I heard him instead. My silence seems to hurt him more than words ever could.

With the other goodbyes, I had a lingering suspicion it wasn't really the last time, but now?

When he walks away from me, I don't have any hope to hold onto anymore.

I realize with bone-chilling clarity that I'll never see Corden again.