Sanjana

I dreaded , my deal with Rishi was slowly coming to an end. Last week, a lot had happened,t he rumor, the fake suicide, Ruby being shamed and Rishi being labelled as a spoilt brat was misbehaving in Dean's presence .

We just had few more days left and I wanted them to be memorable like the previous ones. Rishi never shied from displaying his affection for me. In campus, we exchanged smiles, glances , silence and tender touches. he would find ways to hold hands caress my face, or just leave a peck on the back of my head. I loved it, all of it. It was like stealing our share of twinkle from the stars.

I smiled to self, I had a tough day, for some reason everything was going wrong. I left my assignment in the room and got reprimanded like school girl. I was smiling to self and professor felt I was mocking him. He lectured me but for some reason I was still smiling and he ended up questioning my upbringing. 

When I stepped out, many of my classmates had been teasing me and it had starting getting on my nerves. Ignoring all, I turned my back to them and there he was, my Rishi. He smiled, gave me a flying kiss and gestured with his fingers to smile and I did. It was so effortless, just his mere presence could bring smile on my face.

''Sanjana, your dad is here.'' Pooja informed. That bothered me a bit. It was still middle of the year and our vacations were 2 months away. Thanking Pooja, I made my way to the guest house. I was being directed to his room and I ran to hug my father. ''I missed you!''

He pecked my forehead. ''I missed you as well.''

''All fine at home?'' I asked a little worried finding him here suddenly. Dad smiled but looked away. When he looked at me again, his smile seemed forced. ''All good Sanju. I am here to take you home.''

My heart picked up. I could feel something was off. ''Dad, are you hiding anything? Is all well? Is i about Dadu or anyone else?''

he cupped my cheeks, ''All is well. We are celebrating 40th anniversary for or company, its a big celebration. Thought of getting you as well.''

I took a sigh of relief, ''Is bhai coming?'' Dad preferred silence and I didn't probe. 

''Fine, I will put a leave application for a week and join you tomorrow.''

''You are not coming back Sanjana.'' Dad's voice came  defeated. I lost all my colour. ''Why?''

''I am sorry my child, I am an incompetent father , I couldn't fight for you.'' I tried all but he wouldn't just answer me. I had a choice, refuse to leave or go and fight. I decided to fight. ''I will join you.''

''All Ok?'' I broke down the moment Pooja's soothing hand touched my shoulder. She didn't probe, she just held me till I was done. I told her all and what she said next just got imprinted in my brain. ''Sanjana, love never demands. Be that of family or a partner, Love is about getting heard, its about being free. I am not going to tell you abandon your family, but what you chose today will lay the foundation for your future.'' 

***

Morning, we left for home. I wanted to see Rishi but he was out with his friends. Dad tried to initiate a conversation but this time I chose silence. He should know I was upset and I had right to feel this way. Hereon, I will not cover up my emotions.

The driver parked at my home, and dad undid his seatbelt, before he could step out I declared. ''I will go back in a week dad and no one will be able to stop me.'' I didn't wait for his reply and made my way into the house. The hustle in the house made me wonder if the anniversary party was here. I remember the 30th one, it was held in the office campus and our employees attended. This could not be the business anniversary celebration.

I greeted all my family normally and made my way to my room, dad followed. He looked miserable. After a min, my mom joined too. I locked the door and stood facing them , waiting for them to explain. ''Who is Rishi Sanju?'' Mom asked, all by blood turned cold. I wasn't a fool, I could add and know what were they upto.

''Why am I being pulled out in between my degree?''

''Who is Rishi?'' Mom repeated, this time in a voice that held warning

''A very dear friend.''

''Do you even know what kid of family he comes from?'' We all turned and there he was, the man I loved and now resented the most. It wasn't something that happened in day. Since bhai left, and I stepped out, I realized how shackled I have been all my life. I was being bought up in a way that I believed I had no right to dream. 

''Fight your dreams and me Sanjana''  Rishi's words echoed my ears and I smiled at dadu. ''He comes from a family who understands individuality. They know that its isn't just the elders, but younger members as well deserve the respect.'' Dadu went red in anger

''Look what that filthy boy made of her.'' 

''Dadu! Not him. Its you, who made me like this and its you who made Bhai leave his own house.''  I felt anger racing my veins instead of blood. Dadu's face went red. Mom gripped my arm hard but I didn't flinch, nor I broke the eye contact with Khanna scion, he was the eldest and I was the youngest in the family. I loved him the most, but him taking my dream was not okay.

Dadu left followed by mom but dad stayed there. ''I thought you would refuse to come, this is why I told you that you weren't coming back. Why did you tag along?''

''Who is the guy dad?'' Dad blinked. But Dadu was predictable. My eldest cousin was once dropped home by a college friend and she was being married off in a month. She was never given a choice to explain and she retaliated by never visiting her maternal home. I wondered why no one missed her but Dadu seemed fine and no one spoke of her. Were rules more important than a living talking being? The youngest of my dad's sibling, my chachu had no kids of his own. He and his wife were an arranged match by force, I had heard that from Bhai. They were cordial but never fell in love. Chachu could never forget the one he was forced to leave. 

Small incidents which I never made heed to were now making sense. For Dadu, love meant obedience and surrender; for Rishi it was a rainbow. 

''Who is the guy dad?''

''Kunal, he is a senior at your university. He is the grandson of your grandfather's childhood friend. They reconnected and Kunal expressed his desire to marry you.'' All started falling into place, its Kunal who had let the cat out of the bag. I thought he left me alone, but his stupid ego go bruised of my rejection and he decided to hurt mine. I would rather set him on fire and go to jail than taking seven vows. 

''Sanju, what are you thinking?'' My thoughts broke

''I need your phone as mom took mine.''

''Take mine.'' Chachu said with a smile. I stared at him and he patted my cheek, ''I wish, I had a  half or your courage.''

''Chachu, I am able to because you and dad are giving me hope.'' With that I dialled my brother and explained him all. He chuckled. ''You are watching too many movies.''

''No bhai, I hate drama and I am going to end it.''

The thing about being popular is that people hate and love you equally. Kunal's hunger for popularity had landed him in trouble the past year, he needed a replay. I wasn't just about Rishi, it was about my dream. 

***

I was being locked in my room for next two days but I stayed calm, five more to go and I will be back. I knew I needed support , I had that of bhai openly and silently from Dad and chachu, this pumped my confidence. There was a knock and chachi came in. ''Sanjana, your engagement dress. I smiled, I was going to make a statement.

I refused any help with dressing up, I decided to do it my way. ''Ready for the show Sanju.'' Bhai's messaged popped up on the phone chachu gave me and I smiled. I had turned Kunal down and he will know why. I gave myself one final look and stepped out of the room where my mom and other ladies gasped. I was expecting that, I had deliberately chosen black as Dadu hated it. its an inauspicious color just like this engagement. I didn't wait for my mom and aunts to gather their wits and push me to change . Ignoring all, I made my way to the hall. The best thing about my whole look was, that black wasn't just the color of my dress but it was on my lips, nails  and eye-shadow. I was ready to scare all.

As I walked towards the groom party, I heard a few whispers and a lot of coughing. But cherry on the top was Kunal's expression, he knew I was mad at him , I think a saw a little worry across his face which he quickly masked.  My eyes met that of Dadu and I smirked.

''Kunal! Bad choice Dadu.'' I said out loud. The guests were my family and some from Kunal's side. Looks like Dadu didn't wanted world to know that his grand daughter bought shame to him. But if you ask me, I hell cared. It hurt that he thought so little of me. 

''Behave and sit next to him.'' Dadu said grabbing me by arm

''NO!'' This time my voice matched his pitch. I had a vicious plan but I pitied Kunal's family. They looked like genuine good people and there was no way I would punish them.  ''I am sorry uncle, but you would have guessed from my appearance that I am not interested  in Kunal. I will never be.''

''Why? DID he please you so much in bed that you are ready to against your family.'' Kunal hissed. He wanted me embarrassed, he was looking for a way to make me surrender but I wasn't going to.

''No! I have not had even half of it. How would you know of pleasure with that tiny winky of yours.?'' There were gasps from our families. Kunal gaped and I smiled.  Moving to his family, I handed them an envelope. ''Your son is not as good as he pretends. My plan was to humiliate him for what lies he fed to my family and I should the way he just tried to malign my character, but I am not him.'' His father turned beet red when he pulled out a picture, it was his beloved son with one of the faculty in compromising position.

''That's a professor by the way. I know you saved him from lot of troubles but he left too much behind him'' I chimed. Turning to Dadu, I mocked, ''What a good guy Dadu!''

I had given bhai Rishi's number and had asked him let Rishi know. I knew Rishi, the bad boy in him would go any length for me. And he did. Arche enemies have a habit of keeping the secrets of the rival to cash at the right time and Rishi gave me all the arsenals .

Turning to Kunal I warned, ''These are copies, I will always have originals with me.'' Kunal's family left a little embarrassed and my mom jumped back into the role of ideal daughter in law, ''Sanjana, you have become shameless.''

''No mom! I just grew some balls.'' Guess that was to much as my mother slapped me across the face. I deserved that for using that foul language . Turning to my grandfather I said, ''I am not Karan bhai or Kanika di or any one of your grand kids whose heart you broke. I am Sanajna, I can be more stubborn than you, and I am going back on Saturday.''

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Rishi leave university broken hearted