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[07:42] 🔥Yoongi: If it weren't for you flipping me off, I just might be tempted to fly back to Korea and take you out on a date.

-

Well sh*t.

You had to give your brain a minute to process what he had actually said, while you stood staring blankly at your phone screen.

Date..?

Up until now, your mind hadn't even thought that far ahead.

That is, about what it could mean to actually go on a date with him.

It was still such an abstract concept to you.

So. Far. Away. 

It felt like your mind was on the verge of shutting down completely, but before your last brain-cell was about to die, your phone vibrated once again in your hand.

-

[07:44] 🔥Yoongi: What's the matter, Yoongi's girl? Cat's got your tongue? 😉

[07:45] 🔥Yoongi: I need to get back to work now anyways. I'll talk to you later.

-

Letting out a deep sigh, you felt both frustrated and thankful that you weren't given the opportunity to reply to his text.

At least when the morning rush of customers came, it offered your run-down mind a short break, the rest of your body taking over as you mass-produced cups of coffee on auto-pilot.

By the time it finally calmed down, your frazzled head hadn't even noticed that Hana had been here all morning, manning the other coffee machine right beside you.

Her look of total apprehension suggested she had already picked up that something wasn't quite right, but was maybe a little afraid to ask, until she finally succumbed to the blank stare you were sending her for the last three minutes.

"Uh- Morning unnie, is everything okay?" she stuttered out with a concerned voice, her slightly toned down and new demeanor almost making you appreciate her getting clocked in the face. 

"I don't know-"

"It's nothing, she's just in over her head with boys," Ji-eun blurted out in a half-joking fashion to try and lighten the mood. "Stop worrying so much and just follow your instincts. They're usually right."

"Hmm. It'd be so nice if he just let me know when he was coming back, so then I wouldn't be holding my breath for nothing..." you whispered out defeatedly.

"Girl. Boy's are f*cked! We already knew that and yet we're all still attracted to them." Ji-eun sighed, hopelessly throwing her hands up in frustration. "But no matter what happens, we're still here and we can work through it together."

The only thing you could do was nod in agreement as you picked up a stack of napkins to fold, feeling too defeated to actually respond with words. 

Why did Mr.742 have to become such a necessary presence in my life?

Ugh...

Does he really want to date... me?

As if right on queue, the stereo changed tracks, playing 'Black Swan' by BTS to perfectly capture your heavy mood.

You couldn't help but submit to the empty feeling that was washing over you, as you totally blocked the rest of your surroundings out.

Even if your stomach was still full on pastries again, your heart just felt... drained.

As much as your masked 'Genius' was sending all of these nice and reassuring messages to you, his presence was still so distant.

Being in another country will do that I guess..

But even if he was here, there was still way too many things standing in the way of him ever being a realistic option for you.

I don't even know his name for f*cks sake..

How can I possibly go on a date with someone I can't even look at.

This fantasy that you were craving and missing so much, has been stringing you along for weeks now. 

And for what reason?

Will there ever be an end to this?

The more you dwelled on your loneliness, the more bitter you felt.

I have to get to the bottom of this when he gets back.

As your thoughts drifted, you pulled your phone out of your pocket and went into your Instagram.

In this last day and a half, you had practically forced yourself into not thinking about Taemin, too overcome with guilt over the entire situation you had created for yourself. 

But there he was, as perfect as ever, filling your Instagram newsfeed with another flawless selfie he had just uploaded. 

Without even hesitating, your finger instantly crashed down on the 'like' button, unable to deny such a beautiful face like that. 

As you went into Taemin's profile and stalked through all of his uploaded pictures, you couldn't help but feel awful about your recent behavior towards him, unintentionally tainting your time with him and putting him at a disadvantage.

Right now, you couldn't put it down to anything other than bad timing. 

Had he have come along at a different time, you're sure your hopeless romantic heart would have fallen for him straight away, but with the easy distraction of Mr.742, that proved to be more than difficult. 

The more you thought about the dwindling possibility of Taemin, the more you found yourself pinning the two boys in question together, before the underlying reality came to you.

Unlike your masked 'Genius', Taemin was actually here.

He is whole-hardheartedly a confirmed person, with a name and a face. 

A great face at that. 

But most importantly, since the moment he first met you, he has been so damn open and honest about himself and his feelings towards you.

On paper, everything pointed towards him as the best and healthiest choice laid out for you. 

But since when have I ever done anything that's actually been good for me.

I don't deserve this...

I don't deserve him...

Cr*p.

Setting your phone back in your pocket, you stood motionlessly beside your pile of folded napkins, your shoulders starting to hurt from carrying the weight of all of your emotional baggage for too long now. 

"Oh my god, no F*CKING WAY!" Ji-uen screamed, her sudden outburst making you completely knock your neatly stacked pile of napkins all over the front counter. 

"What the fu-"

"Girl. I need you to sit down. Shut up. And listen. You're not going to believe this," she cut in like a knife, your eyes growing wide in anticipation for whatever she was about to say. 

She took in a large breath of air to steady herself, before a sinister smile began to cross her face.

By now she had already gained the full attention of both yourself and Hana on the other side of the counter, both of you looking at her as if your faces were about to melt off with the amount of curiosity that was coursing through you. 

And to say that Ji-eun wasn't actually relishing in each of your reactions, would be a complete lie.

"Spit it out already!" you finally snapped, unable to wait any longer for what could be so damn good for this kind of a build up. 

"They're holding a fan meeting! On your birthday! Not too far away from here!!" she finally blurted out all at once, jumping up and down like an over-excited puppy. 

"W-who's holding a fan meeting?" Hana opened her mouth before thinking. 

"Are you really that thick? BTS of course!!" Ji-eun squealed, pointing at the announcement on her phone screen and slapping Hana's arm at her apparent stupidity. 

"No WAY! On my BIRTHDAY?!" 

You could feel your eyes almost bulging out of their sockets in excitement.

Call it a fate, call it destiny.

For the longest that you could remember, you've always wanted to watch BTS perform live and attend one of their fan meetings. 

And being given the opportunity to meet your idols in real life was the kind of story you might only hear about in fairy tales and fan fictions. 

If this isn't some kind of higher power giving you a sign this fan meet was meant to be, you don't know what is.

But that euphoric adrenaline was quickly banished the second your eyes narrowed in on the announcement Ji-eun was holding out for you to read, the price of said fan meeting being well beyond anything you could ever afford. 

Great

F*cking fantastic

You let out a deep groan of disappointment from your inability to handle money responsibly, sending out a mental curse at all of your impulsive pizza deliveries that were now coming back to haunt you. 

Why does my broke-b*tch ass always have to pay the consequences because my stomach insists on living the high life?!

It took Ji-eun a hot minute to notice your dramatic shift in mood, before she finally realized the reason behind it, while Hana looked on completely oblivious to anything and everything that was going on around her. 

Letting out a loud sob in despair, Ji-eun was fast to join in, bawling in unison over how pathetically poor the pair of you were. 

I swear...

The second I start getting excited for anything, life just has to come along and thunder punch me in the throat. 

-----

Hi Angels!

How are you all?

It's Thursday, and my brain still doesn't know up from down, I'm so tired. 

My last week had me spiraling downwards, which inhibited my ability to write anything without sounding so clinical and numb. But here I am, back at it with a fake smile! 😊

So with this new update with Mr Genius still away in Japan, our character was left to the devices and destruction of her own mind. Overthinking is a serious problem lmao. 

I hope you liked this recent update!! I'll try my darnest to publish as frequently as my body will allow I promise! I'm only praying that everyone can continue to be as brilliantly understanding  as you have been to the huge amount of life responsibilities I need to uphold at the same time, in amongst everything else. 

Thank you so much for sticking with me so far! I see your lovely comments of encouragement and your hilarious reactions. You have no idea how appreciative I am of it, and how much it further motivates me. 

As always, sending out lots of love and hugs to everyone. Hoping you're all safe and well. 

xxx Katie