"Maybe if I lay upside down long enough all the blood will rush to my head and I'll die." Michael said, letting out a sigh.

It was Saturday afternoon and Michael had come over in the morning, after I texted him and told him that I had nothing to do all day and I was bored and lonely. We were currently laying upside down at the edge of my bed, our heads touching the floor as we both discussed how much life in general just sucked.

"I don't think you'll die," I chuckled, "I'm pretty sure you'll just pass out for a little while and then wake up."

"Damn." Michael sighed again.

"Are you hungry?" I asked, getting a little anxious. I couldn't even remember how long we had just been sitting like that, and it seemed like the two of us had gone hours just staring at the wall across the room.

"Nope."

"Are you thirsty?" I asked. Michael just laughed loudly and pulled his phone out, his fingers tapping away at the screen while he continued to hang upside down.

"I'm tired." He finally answered.

"So am I." I agreed, because it was true. I hadn't gotten much sleep the night before, because even though a few days had passed since my whole encounter with Ashton I chose last night to really think it over. And my thoughts kept me awake until the early morning, so by the time I finally drifted off it was practically time for me to wake up again.

"Seriously, I haven't slept in almost two weeks." Michael said, still laughing lightly as he let his phone fall to the floor in front of his face, like he was going to stare at it as he waited for a reply to whatever text he just sent.

"Why?" I questioned.

"Nightmares." Michael answered softly, "I have a lot of nightmares, and reoccurring dreams."

"Oh." I nodded the best I could while laying upside down. I wanted to ask more about Michael's nightmares, but I didn't want to push him, so I stayed silent.

"They're mostly flashbacks. Really vivid flashbacks. I have meds for it, but sometimes I don't take them, just because." He shrugged.

"I'm sure that if you took the meds you'd get a better sleep at night," I said, just as a suggestion. I wasn't going to force Michael in to taking the medication when he didn't want to, because it wasn't my place to force him to do something like that, but I did know that he would feel a lot better if he just listened to his doctors and took the medicine that they prescribed him.

"Sometimes they're good flashbacks, and I don't want to miss them." Michael sad, glancing at his phone once more and then picking it up again.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Like... Sometimes they're memories from a few years ago. When I lived with Ashton and my sister and his dad didn't hate me so much and everything wasn't as bad as it is now." Michael explained.

"Oh." I nodded, playing around with the ends of my hair.

"Now Ashton probably hates me too, I don't know." Michael sighed, "He doesn't even want to try and talk to me anymore."

"I guess that's kind of my fault." I chuckled nervously, hoping that my comment wouldn't start yet another argument between us. I had just gotten Michael back, I couldn't afford to lose him again over something stupid like this.

"It's both of your faults - It's all of our faults." Michael corrected himself. He set down his phone again, glancing at it every few seconds, the expression on his face showing that he was both worried and a little anxious as well.

"I guess." I shrugged again.

"I really wish that the two of you would stop being so stubborn and just get back together." Michael groaned. He finally let himself flip over and fall to the ground, holding his head like it hurt to be right side up again.

"We aren't stubborn." I argued, though I already knew that it was true. I flipped over as well, now laying on the floor next to Michael.

"Yes you are." Michael scoffed, "You're both upset with each other for really stupid things, even though everyone can tell that deep down you want to be together again."

"They're not stupid things..." I said quietly, mostly because I couldn't even remember exactly why Ashton and I had broken up or why we were mad at each other in the first place.

"He's upset with you for lying and now for almost having sex with me - sorry about that - and you're basically just upset with him for being upset with you. And for being a dick." Michael chuckled, "But, yeah, pretty stupid reasons."

"I guess you're right." I sighed.

"You know I'm right." Michael countered.

"Yeah." I laughed halfheartedly, my fingers still twisting around the ends of my hair. "I just... I wish that everything could go back to normal. Things are so shitty now, I feel like my entire life is just going downhill."

"Life has always been shitty, Dani Murphy, it just took you a while to figure that out." Michael sat up, raking his fingers through his hair to try and straighten it out again.

I only let out a deep sigh in response, because once again Michael was right and I didn't know how to answer him.

"You know," Michael coughed, clearing his throat. "I'm leaving towards the end of the school year."

"Leaving?" I questioned, forgetting for a second that I knew exactly what he was talking about.

"That rehab place."

"They're seriously making you go there? I thought you were better now?" I asked. I could feel myself beginning to panic, because what was I going to do without Michael? I mean, I would always have Luke, and Brooke, and maybe Calum, but as long as Ashton and I kept this up it didn't seem like we'd be getting back together any time soon. If Michael left I'd feel completely alone all over again.

"Either I go there or I live on the streets. Ashton's dad doesn't want me living at their place anymore." Michael shrugged, giving me a sad smile.

"You can just live here, can't you?" I suggested. We had plenty of space, and Michael already made himself at home half of the time he was here anyway. "I don't think my parents will even notice, you can stay in one of our guest rooms."

"I couldn't do that." Michael chuckled, shaking his head at me.

"Why?" I whined. I shouldn't have put up a fight, though, because I knew that this would never work. Michael needed help, and if this was the best thing for him then I shouldn't try to stop him from getting what he needed.

"It'll be better for me if I go there. I need to figure things out, I need help." Michael explained.

"Can I visit you?" I asked, a smile creeping onto my face.

"If you really care that much to." Michael shrugged.

"We can write letters." I suggested. I'd always wanted a pen-pal when I was younger, maybe this was just my opportunity to get one.

"I have shitty handwriting." Michael laughed.

"Excuses, excuses." I joked, sitting up straight and shaking out my hair. Michael stood up, picking his phone up from the floor.

"I need to go now." He said slowly, holding out a hand for me to stand as well.

"Oh." I said softly, looking down at the floor. Of course I felt like I'd done something to make him want to leave, even though in the back of my mind I knew that certainly wasn't the case. "Okay."

"I'll see you later, I guess? At school or something?" Michael questioned. It was still kind of hard for the two of us to try and meet up during school or find time to talk somewhere, because Ashton watched both of us wherever we went. He probably thought that one of us was going to pull something again.

"Yeah." I nodded, pulling Michael forward into a big hug. He rubbed my back and left a quick (but sweet) kiss on my forehead before pulling back again.

"Goodbye, Dani." Michael said, licking his lips as we walked backwards towards my bedroom door, which was still open from when he came in a few hours earlier.

"Bye," I said as I watched him leave, closing the door behind him.

I laid down on my bed again and closed my eyes, trying hard to get just a little sleep to make up for all of the hours that I spent staring a my ceiling last night, wide awake. I had almost drifted off a couple hours later when I heard my phone vibrating on my bedside table, and I slowly rolled over to answer it. I had time I check the name of the caller before accepting the call, and seeing that it was Ashton, I began to worry a little.

"Hello?" I asked slowly, fearing that something was wrong. Ashton was mad at me, wasn't he? Why would he call?

"Hi, Da-Murphy?" Ashton asked, coughing a few times.

"Yeah?" I questioned.

"Hi, um, we really need to talk, can we meet up somewhere? Like, tonight?" Ashton asked quickly, not giving me much time to even think this over.

"Yeah, sure." I nodded to myself, thinking that maybe this would finally be my chance to sit down with Ashton and explain everything to him, and hopefully make things...better.

"Okay, cool." Ashton giggled. "I'll text you an address, bye."

And with that, Ashton hung up, leaving me very confused and nervous about meeting up with him later tonight.

-

I'm laughing