April 21, 20XX
Wednesday

This morning, as I ride the train into work, I think about how bittersweet my nostalgia is. 

When I start vet school, I won't be heading to this side of town anymore. I most likely won't even be riding the train since a bus is easier. 

Giggles in front of me cause me to look up, a boy and a girl in matching college sweatshirts play around with each other. When the girl playfully hits the boy's chest, he grabs her hand and yanks her closer to him, enveloping her in a hug.

Cute.

Giving them some privacy, I look down to re-read the letter in my hand over and over.

The one I will be delivering to Taehyung soon.

I thought a lot about us after our date and I've finally came to the perfect decision for us.

When the train arrives at my stop, I get off and take my time walking to Winter Bear, letting the anxiety build up inside of me. 

After overthinking a bit, I cover my face and spin around, "Ugh!"

When I bring my hands down, I see Sungjae right in front of me, head tilted and very curious.

"Sungjae!"

He breaks into a grin, "Jen. Nie."

I quickly throw the letter into my purse before he could notice it. 

Looking up at him, he raises an eyebrow still smiling as he puts his hands in his pockets. 

"You weren't here yesterday."

"And you weren't here the day before." 

He pouts, "I know. I caught a cold or something that's why I barely texted, forgive me?"

I smile at him, "Of course."

After all, I was also busy...

He chews on his lip, "Did you see this morning's email?"

Pulling out my phone, I check my inbox, "No, I was running around this morning. Why? Is there a meeting or something?"

He shakes his head, "No...and there might not ever be."

I freeze, looking up at him, concerned.

"What?"

He starts walking inside and I follow after him.

Running his fingers through his hair, he sighs, "Winter Bear is closing."

Blinking my eyes, I think about whether I heard that right.

"Really?"

Out of the corner of my eye, I catch Taehyung briskly walking in the hallway with a dark expression.

He didn't even glance my way.

"Did something happen?"

Sungjae shakes his head, walking into our office.

When I drop into my chair, he leans in close .

"Nothing bad. Apparently, Taehyung's name skyrocketed overnight. This little place won't be enough to handle the offers that are gunna flow in."

Does that mean Taehyung finally accepted an offer? Unlike what he told me?

Has he made his decision after our date?

I bite my lip, having nothing much to say other than, "I see..."

When I pick up my head, I see Sungjae still looking at me.

Then it hits me.

"Wait...what does that mean for you, Sungjae?"

He leans back on his chair, arms above his head. "Guess, it's time for my next adventure."

"Opening a studio of your own?"

He chuckles, "No, I'm not that adventurous. Maybe, I'll do some freelance work. Just travel around and take pictures, but don't worry...I won't be far from you."

The way he says it gives me tiny butterflies and makes me feel guilty at the same time.

There's never room for two in a heart.

I wipe the sweat on my palms and look over at the letter in my purse, debating whether it was the time for it.

"Jennie?" Sungjae tilts his head, eyes studying my face.

I raise my eyebrows.

"Did you...enjoy the date with me? I never actually asked..."

The date with Sungjae was definitely needed at the time.

I really enjoyed spending time with him,

But the time with him is different than the time with Taehyung.

Hating the mixture of emotions, I quickly stand up and grab the letter.

"I'll answer that after I come back!" I shoot him a smile to which he nods, unbothered.

I take a deep breath and rush over to Taehyung's office, more determined than ever.

As I turn the corner, I bump into Irene, almost knocking her over.

"Gosh," she says as she steadies herself, a bit dramatic if you ask me.

I don't apologize.

Looking up at me, she raises an eyebrow. "And where are you headed?"

I narrow my eyes at her, taking a step closer.

"Not a place that concerns you."

She drops her jaw. "Excuse me? Are you getting a little out of line because this place is closing? Or," she covers her mouth, smirk behind her hand, "Have you not gotten that news yet?"

Apathetic to her comment, I step to the side and walk past her.

Stopping in my tracks, I decide to address her and turn around.

"Just so you know, I'm not stupid. I'm aware of everything that you've been doing. You might think that you succeeded in making my life harder, but you've actually failed. I'm still standing here, stronger than ever. All that you've done is taught me how to never treat anyone else. I'd say 'I hope one day you realize what you've done and' blah blah, but I don't even care about that. I know karma will come around and bite you in the ass."

Irene turns red, "Do you know who you're talking to?"

I just smile her way, shrugging my shoulders before walking away.

"Don't worry," I say as I walk, "I'm not going to be in your way anymore. See how boring your life turns out when I'm no longer living in your head."

When I walk into Taehyung's office, I close the door and lean against it, catching my breath.

The rustling of papers makes me realize Taehyung is in fact at his desk.

He quickly puts everything to the side, sitting up straighter in surprise that I'm there.

"Jennie..."

The way my name comes out of his mouth will never leave my memories.

I walk over and sit in one of the chairs across his desk.

With a smile, I place the letter on his desk and slide it over.

He picks it up and my eyes linger on his fingers, recalling the way they feel when they intertwine with mine.

When he finishes reading it, he looks over at me.

"I-is this because Winter Bear is closing? I... there will be more positions available and I'll always recomm-"

I shake my head. "I wrote this before I knew we were closing."

His face falls, "Why?"

"I'm starting vet school sooner than I thought. I'll just take out loans to help and use the money I've said up for other things."

Taehyung opens his mouth and I raise my hand. 

"I know you want to help...but I need to do this on my own. I need that satisfaction and I know it'll be hard for you to understand that."

Taehyung continues to stare at my resignation.

"Where does that leave us?" He asks softly, afraid of the answer.

"Right here," I whisper back, suddenly not feeling so brave anymore.

I reach over and take his hand in mine. "I'm so proud of us, Taehyung. You're moving on to fulfill your dreams and so am I. We always talked about reaching this point in our lives. I think our past selves would be very happy."

We just never knew it would mean without each other.

His eyelashes flutter and when he looks at me, I see the tears they've picked up.

"Jennie, this isn't my dream anymore. I don't care about the fame or the success. Please...please don't give up on us."

He closes his eyes and gives my hand a squeeze.

When I try to pull my hand away, he squeezes it harder.

I tilt my head to the side, staring at our hands, my heart hurting.

"Taehyung, we'll always have each other. We're Yejoon's parents after all. I'm not going back on my promise about letting you see him. We'll see each other again. This doesn't mean it's our final goodbye. We can still be friends..."

"So you've given up on us being together?" Taehyung's eyes are now glossy, his eyebrows furrowed together as he tries to understand.

I nod.

He looks away, shaking his head and for the first time, I see he's angry about that when he's usually hard to read.

"What about Sungjae? Are you giving him a chance?"

My breath hitches and I'm rendered speechless.

"Jennie, don't." He begs.

Why is he acting like this now? Wasn't he always so passive about everything?

"I don't think I'll be with anyone. This was never about you or him...this was about me."

Taehyung's grip on my hand loosens and I slowly take it back.

"I don't want to forget," he says so quietly that I lean in a little closer to hear him.

He locks eyes with me.

"I don't want to lose those memories forever."

I gently place my hand to cup the side of his face, Taehyung leaning into it. 

Is he afraid that if he doesn't see me for a while, his memories will never return of our time together?

He's still hanging on to that little bit of hope, but I've come to terms with the reality that they won't come back to him. 

"I think the most important parts of memories are the feelings they give a person. I will always carry the memory of us and think fondly of them. You've given me the sweetest time of my youth. I'm sorry, you can't feel that, but you have time to create your own."

Taehyung drops away from my hand, leaning back on his chair as the tears roll down his face.

"When are you leaving?" He asks.

"Tomorrow," I answer. "I'm going to meet with my counselor in the afternoon so...I'll just finish everything off in the meantime."

Taehyung shakes his head, still upset. He suddenly glances over at the papers on his desk. When I look as well, I see the divorce papers I've given to him before.

"I can't sign them now. Not right now." Taehyung firmly tells me.

I nod, "I understand. Take your time."

I've taken all this time to finally accept everything, it would only be fair to give him the same.

He nods and I take that as my cue to leave, before I step out he calls my name.

"Jennie, please never forget me."

I smile sadly, "I won't."

Walking out of his office, I feel so relieved that I start breaking down in tears.

I did it.

I learned to let him go.

I don't wipe away my tears, okay with letting myself cry. 

After all, I'm crying because I've done something that I'm proud of.

Right?