Eclipse Of The Moon ~ Book 1 of Aaron
Chapter 0
A Master Dom's Nostalgia

Temporary note: It seems like copy-pasting from Word to Wattpad doesn't work very well at the moment and that some parts disappear in the process. I have tried to make sure nothing was missing, but if you see things that sound incoherent, missing conversations or whatever, let me know and I'll double check. Thanks!

Tuesday 25 August 2015

Shit! This day is never going to end and I'm so bored!

Well, grab your shit together, Aaron. Pull your fingers out of your ass and move! You've got work to do!

Yeah right... Fingers in my ass. No way! Nothing has been in there in almost eleven years and nothing ever will again, not even my fingers!

But I get the message. It just means I should pull myself through and get busy, but I can't. I still have another day and a half lazing around since the Black Moon operates only from Thursday to Sunday and the Black Diamond is closed for works. I do have some stuff to do, but not much and the less I have to do, the less I am motivated. Especially with this fucking state of gloom I have been in for the past month.

I'm afraid things won't get any better when I decide to sell the Black Moon and the Black Diamond. What am I going to do after that? Managing a nightclub is the only thing I can do, and I thought I had been doing well so far. I was wrong. Oh, the Black Moon has become a very successful discotheque and rakes in huge profits. So does the Black Diamond by the way, but I fucked up.

I fucked up when I let the Devil become a member of the private club and didn't see his perverted and evil schemes.

I fucked up when two of my adorable Buddies got abducted, tortured and raped by the Devil. I will never forgive myself for that. Not until they are both safe and sound.

A knock suddenly echoes on the entrance door of my loft, pulling me out of my daze. I'm not expecting any visitor and with the club being closed at the moment, I wonder who it could be. Maybe one of the workmen taking care of the renovations at the Black Diamond...

It takes me a colossal effort to eventually get up from the couch, grunting when I step onto an empty box of pizza, and head for the door. Contrary to my expectations, this is not a workman standing in front of me, but Camden. Camden Hall, one of my best friends. It's only noon, or shortly after, so what the heck is he doing here? He should be at his practice, massaging bodies as far as I know. In any event, I don't like the disapproval in his eyes as he stares at me.

"Hey, what are you doing here? You rarely come unannounced," I say in a dull tone, but he doesn't answer and invites himself in.

Well... Just make yourself at home, Bro... My home is your home...

I shut the door and follow him to the living room where he takes in the mess. No big surprise for him though, he knows how shambolic I am. He quickly stops by the fridge in the open kitchen, grabs some cans of Pepsi Max and once he has freed some space on the couch, pushing away the clothes that lay there, he sits down.

"No problem, Cam. Make yourself at ease! If you and Noah don't have enough space at my other apartment, feel free to settle in this one," I sigh as I join him on the couch and steal a can from his hand.

"You would have found some good excuse if I'd called in advance. You haven't replied to my last texts and ignored my calls for the last three days anyway," he retorts accusingly.

True. I must admit I have needed some distance from my friends in the past few days, but I had my reasons. I'm not saying I was right because I know how bad it can get when I try to avoid them to solve my own problems, but the news I have to break will upset them and I have tried to postpone the deadline. Besides, I'm not the only one with that flaw. They have all had their moments of isolation when in trouble, so that's only a fair revenge. Maybe aside of Mark... But Mark is Mark. Communication is his motto and whenever he is in need, he always forces himself to reach out to his friends for help.

"That's annoying, huh...?" I reply bitterly, and he knows I am referring to the couple of days he isolated himself from our group of friends back in July.

"Greatly... But I know you to be cleverer than to take a little revenge on the short withdrawal I had a few weeks ago, so would you care to explain what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong Cam, I'm just tired..." I lie, though it's partly true. I am really exhausted.

"Ron, please don't take me for a fool because that's pretty insulting," he replies with offense.

"I'm just really tired, Cam. Tired of all this," I sigh, and I wonder if he gets the double meaning of my words.

"What? The club? The lifestyle?"

Yeah, Cam is a smart guy, so he does get what I mean. Perhaps it's time to open up, Aaron?

"Yeah, sort of... I just can't forgive myself for not seeing that a member of my club was a demon who kidnapped two of my boys almost before my eyes," I explain with a strangled voice as emotion fills me.

The truth hurts so badly! Even if one of the boys has been saved since then, the second one is still missing and I won't find peace of mind until he is found. Speaking with a Dominant to whom one of said boys belongs to doesn't make it easier. Especially when he's one of my best friends.

"Ron!!! Stop that! You can't blame yourself for what happened! It wasn't your fault!" Cam replies with anger.

For all I know, he should be hating me instead. After all, his little Noah was kidnapped by that devil of Andrei! Doesn't he understand the extent of my responsibility? Doesn't he understand the depth of my guilt?

"For fuck's sake, the guy was here almost every week since he kidnapped Jeremy and until we got Noah back, laughing in our face and I didn't see anything! I didn't notice a fucking thing in his behavior! How do you want me to not feel responsible about that? Fuck!!! I just don't get how we could fuck up his background check like that!" I ramble.

Recruiting Andrei as a member of the Black Diamond occurred in particular circumstances. He was one of the rare persons I didn't personally train because he had been in the lifestyle for many years and had recommendation letters from two serious BDSM clubs. Nonetheless, we still had his background checked.

Mike Anderson, my security manager, investigates each new member before they are certified. I have known Mike for so many years, he has always done such a great job, I can't even blame him. It seems like that fucking Andrei was really good and it would have been hard to find anything against him. Yet, I should have sensed something was wrong and there lays the problem.

"I'll tell you how! That guy is a sociopath and he was prepared. From what we've been told by the police, it would have been impossible to find out! There was nothing suspicious under his real name! The police aren't even able to relate him to the guy who owned the house in the forest! All the official activities he had are purely legal and there's still no evidence of corruption or traffic or whatever! All we have is Noah's words to know what really happened there and the fact that I did see him! There is nothing else, Ron! Nothing at all! So stop blaming yourself!"

"I know that, Cam! Still... he was in my club all this time! I spoke with him on a regular basis. I should have felt something was wrong!" I argue.

"Don't you dare say that, Aaron! What about me then? I fucking took his defense when Josh and Mark accused him without any evidence! How do you think I feel about this, huh? Trust me, I really hate myself for that because if I'd had more faith in their guts, I would have stuck to him like a leech and found out what he was about! You did a great job with everything, Ron... I swear you did!"

My friend's words, though deeply sincere, don't ease my pain. Knowing that our two other best friends, Joshua and Mark, had felt something was off only makes me feel guiltier. I am the fucking Master Dom of the Black Diamond and I spend much more time around the members than any other person! I should have known better! There's no point arguing on this with Cam, though, so I change the subject, one truth that he can't deny.

"But Jeremy is still missing..."

"And this is not your role to find him! We've got Tony on it, a private detective, the police... What more can we do? I'm sure we will find him at some point, but in the meantime... as much as it hurts to think about him and Gary, we have to move on and show ourselves strong," Cam replies, more or less rightfully. I can't resolve myself to see things like this though.

"Honestly... I rather feel like moving back," I comment meaningfully.

"What shall I understand from that?" Cam asks warily, concern spreading on his face. "Ron... What do you mean?" he insists.

I sigh and recline against the backrest of the couch, closing my eyes.

"I mean... I mean that I start questioning the rightfulness and soundness of all this," I whisper.

"Care to explain? What are you talking about?"

"The club... I just can't deal with the idea that such a demon was there and abused so many Subs... This is not the concept of the lifestyle."

"Are you kidding me, Aaron? As far as I know, there was never a complaint from any of the Subs he fucked here. The only one he abused once was Chris and now we know how Chris himself was fucked up! This is bullshit, Ron! Besides, he's gone now and..."

"I'm thinking about not reopening the club, Cam, or selling it," I cut him.

Now, that's said. The cat is out. I still have my eyes shut but I can already feel the anger emanating from my friend.

"Don't you fucking dare to do that!" he shouts with anger.

"I can't trust myself after what happened."

Without seeing him, I can yet stroke Camden's exasperation and rage radiating. Although he has learned to control his urges, I am almost expecting him to burst out in one of his violent bouts; hands that would grip my tee-shirt and shake me; a fist that would connect with my jaw. It wouldn't be the first time. However, it's more about a cold wrath here, which is even worse.

Camden is a Sadist. Not only does he revel in the physical pain he can inflict to people, he also takes great pleasure in tormenting their mind. BDSM has taught him to channel these urges in more consensual ways, with masochistic Submissives. His love for Noah has somewhat tamed these compulsions, but his natural instincts are still here, ready to blow up. I can tell I'm about to suffer.

"Oh fuck! I'm sure Ivan would be proud of you right now! I'm sure he'd praise you for such a stupid decision..." he says with heavy sarcasm.

What was I saying again? Tormenting people's minds? No, it's worse than torment here; it's torture.

It fucking hurts!

Like every human soul on this planet, my past is made of joyful and darker memories that I have learned to live with. It doesn't mean that I like talking about them and my best friends usually know better than to broach certain difficult topics.

Ivan is one of them.

Ivan features in so many of my happiest memories, but the last I have of him is one that will haunt me for the rest of my life. Eight and a half years after he passed away, he hasn't left my mind and I do appreciate his spectral presence at the back of my head whenever I need his strength. Hearing his name or references to who he was is a different story. As soon as Cam has voiced the name he shouldn't have pronounced, my heart sourly constricts in my chest and holding my tears becomes a thorny struggle.

"That's a low blow, Cam..." I mutter bitterly.

"Yep...But dare say I'm not right! Dare say Ivan would approve of your decision! Dare say that the lifestyle hasn't saved hundreds of Subs from running off the tracks! Dare say that it hasn't provided hundreds of Dominants to release their violence in a consensual and decent way! Dare say that it didn't save you from a doomed fate...that Ivan didn't do the best job with making you the man you are today! Dare say that you didn't save me from my own violence... or Noah from his own sick mind! Dare say that the Diamond hasn't provided all that!"

Camden's words hit me right in the heart and it hurts so badly. I can't even withhold my tears anymore. I am so thunderstruck that my own words remain blocked in my throat.

He's right, though, and within a few seconds, significant reminiscences of my past flash back in my head. The way Ivan saved me from a doomed future. The way he got me back on track. The way he molded me into a loyal and accomplished Master Dom, teaching me all he knew about BDSM. Every single thing that Cam just said is the plain truth. This lifestyle has helped so many people to cope with their urges. It has been a guiding light for so many of us.

Camden is another eloquent specimen of a successful immersion into the BDSM lifestyle. Born in an abusive family, Cam apparently inherited from his father's violent genes or whatever phenomenon that psychologists would refer to, something he fought for years without much success until he discovered BDSM. Ever since he became a member of the Black Diamond, he has grown better and better at fighting his urges, indulging in hardcore sex with masochistic Submissives in a consensual way. He even found his soulmate in Noah, a young Masochist who needed the lifestyle to fight his own self-harm compulsions.

"Ron..." Cam whispers softly as he leans over and rests his hands on my thighs, his face only an inch from mine. "I think you're tired indeed, or you wouldn't talk such nonsense. You need a break, Bro... Take a real vacation. Or at least, get out of Chicago for a few days. You need a breather..."

"I don't know..."

"I know..." he insists, heeling a bit forward and resting his forehead against mine. "Mike can supervise the works; I can help him too; the Black Moon can run without you for a few days. I really think you've reached such a state of exhaustion that your thoughts have become just incoherent. So pack a few clothes and get out of here. Go get some fresh air out of the city... Just go anywhere else for a few days..."

Camden's reasoning makes sense. I am truly exhausted. I haven't taken a real vacation in ages and the last few months have been terrible. Managing a nightclub doesn't mean working during opening hours only. It is about handling a company with a lot of staff, responsibilities, administrative matters, dealing with suppliers and more. I have Mike to support me since he is in charge of all the safety aspects of the club and I am glad to have great employees who do their job well, but the rest of the work is on my hands.

I do sleep in in the mornings since I usually don't go to bed until 5 or 6 am, but by 1pm on most days, I am at work, performing my usual tasks. Managing the Black Moon isn't that hard in the end, but the Black Diamond is a different story. Enjoying live porn and fucking Subs all the time is the fun part. Behind the scenes, it involves much more. As the Master Dom, I get to train all the members and that's a huge responsibility because I don't want to see them fuck up. The way they will evolve in the lifestyle entirely depends on what I teach them, so I dedicate a lot of time to this.

I'm not complaining, I truly love my job. Music and sex have been my life for years now and to be honest, I don't really want to change this. Still, the guilt that has been eating since July has clearly dampened my eagerness. It's not that I don't like it anymore, it's just that I failed catching a Dominant and a Sub who had made an evil pact. My tiredness certainly doesn't help in my own reasoning, Cam might have a point here, but I can't be sure.

"You might be right..." I sigh.

"Of course I'm right, Master Dom... Why don't you go and visit Aiden? I'm sure his crazy Zach would be happy to blow some sense into you... or some essence out of you," he suggests, and I can't suppress a small smile pulling at my lips when he leans back up.

Aiden owns a successful nightclub in New York City, one that is similar to the Black Moon and also shelters a private BDSM club. Although we don't get to meet very often – mostly when I visit my supplier of Saint Andrew's crosses in Newark – Aiden has become a good friend of mine. Each of our encounters involve a lot of sexual pleasure, even more so since he settled with his Baby Zach. Just thinking about the last time I was there makes my cock swell in my pants and I couldn't care less if Camden notices.

"Thanks Cam... I'll think about it."

"You're welcome, Bro, and yeah... please think about it and don't make any stupid decisions. We need the club and we need you to keep us on track... Master Dom..." he says meaningfully.

And that, I usually do. Camden knows it better than any other Dom. A closer watch over the Sadists has always been a fundamental rule at the Black Diamond, closer than for more regular Doms. However, whatever the Doms' tendencies are, nothing would prevent me from disciplining a man who has messed up. Being one of my closest friends does give what some people might call privileges; having dinner together in the meeting room attached to my office; spending the evening on my favorite couch; having a permanent private playroom.

However, the policies of the Black Diamond remain the same for all members, and I expect each and everyone of them to abide by my rules. Transgressing means deserving a punishment and that applies to all members. Officially, Camden has tasted my punitive whip twice so far, but he knows I always play fair and that the goal is to keep him on the right track.

"We'll see about that. How's Noah doing?" I ask, willing to change the subject now.

"He's doing good. Better and better every day now that his Daddy's back," he smirks at me.

Like I said earlier, Noah is one of the two Submissives who were abducted and abused by that fucker of Andrei. He was rescued about a month ago after two weeks of captivity. Unfortunately, Andrei managed to escape with Jeremy, the other missing Submissive, and he still hasn't been found. Needless to say, Noah went through a rough patch after his liberation, copping with various forms of guilt, and it took Camden to go back full Dom on him to start healing. The boy really needed this and I'm glad to hear things are getting better.

"I told you that's what he needed."

"Yeah, yeah, I know, you were right, as always. Well... most of the time," he replies pointedly.

"Drop it, Cam, I said I'd think about it! Why are you not at work by the way?" I then ask.

"I needed to talk some sense into a friend of mine and I want to prepare the playroom at home for a scene with Noah, so I took the afternoon off."

I just roll my eyes at that. Lucky bastard... Damn! I need some release too!

As soon as Cam has left, I flop back into the couch and close my eyes but images of him fucking his boy senseless pop in my mind. It's been ten days already. Ten freaking long days without fucking a Sub and I am in serious withdrawal. The Black Diamond had its last evening a week and a half ago and now that it's closed for renovation and rearrangements, I no longer have all these guys I can play with in my playroom. The first floor of the club which holds the Subs' room and all the private playrooms is ready and I could definitely call one of the non-contracted boys to enjoy his ass, but I still haven't done that.

Instead, I have just been jerking off to footage videos on my laptop, but it's not as good as pounding into a tight hole.

Fuck! I'm so hard!

I could do this again.

I could grab my laptop and watch recordings, but now that Cam has instilled the idea of a vacation in my head, the kinky images populating my mind soon turn into a threesome with Aiden and Zach.

A short vacation. Just a few days off and away from Chicago...

Could Cam possibly be right? Could it solve my worries and help me to see things differently? Could a talk with Aiden change my mind on selling the club? I'm not sure. My mind won't ever be at peace for as long as the sweet Jeremy is missing and my friend Gary suffering from his absence.

However, Camden is right. I need that breather and Mike could perfectly supervise the Black Moon and the works at the Black Diamond for a few days.

Things go fast from here. I first call Mike and tell him about my plans to get out of the city until the end of the week. The jerk tells me he was hoping for that and was actually about to kick me out himself. As far as I know, I am the boss here and the one who could kick him out, but I'd never do that. Mike is too good at what he is doing and one of the rare persons I trust entirely. Thank goodness, he accepts my request even though it's not part of his job, and my next call is for Aiden.

"Hi Aaron! How are you doing?"

"Hi Aiden. Not too bad, and you?"

"Hmm... Not too bad doesn't sound like the Aaron I know. I'd even say it's bad. What's wrong? Are you having problems with the works at the club?"

"No, no, that part's going well. The club should reopen in about ten days as planned. I've just been through quite a lot of stress recently," I reply evasively while checking the available flights online at the same time.

Aiden doesn't know what happened in July yet because the last time we spoke was in June, after his best friend Ethan visited the Black Diamond with his Sub and when I told him about the changes I was going to make to the club in August.

"Well, who else than a Master Dom can understand another Master Dom's issues? You know I can be a sympathetic ear if you need, Aaron. Besides, since you're more or less on holiday, I know a Baby who'd be happy to relieve some of your stress," he replies in a smug tone.

"Busted! That was actually the purpose of my call," I smirk back. "Are you guys at the club tonight?"

"Of course! Are you in New York already?"

"Nope. But I will, tonight. I'm booking my flight right now and... there's one scheduled to land around 6pm."

"Cool!"

"I'll go pack up now and I'll find a hotel on my way to the airport. I'll see you tonight!"

"Wait, wait, wait! You already have a hotel! You'll be staying with Zach and me!"

"Nah, I don't want to intrude..."

"I wouldn't offer if that was the case," Aiden shuts me. "Trust Zach will be more than happy to have two Master Doms at home for a few days!" Aiden insists and I must admit, it's very tempting.

Aiden is someone I can openly talk to because we share the same stress of running similar clubs and Zach is a fun guy. Besides, it could be fun living with them for a couple of days.

"Thanks, Aiden, I appreciate."

"Then go pack up and join us directly at the club. If you catch that flight, you should arrive by 7pm and since it's Tuesday, it should be only me and Zach, but I'll make sure he has dinner in the Subs' Room by that time so that we can talk quietly first."

"Great, see you tonight then!"

As soon as I have hung up, I finalize the booking of my flights, planning a return on Saturday afternoon so that Mike only has to deal with the Black Moon on Thursday and Friday night. I then send a general text to my three best friends to inform them I'll be in New York for the rest of the week, book myself a cab that will be here in fifteen minutes and finally, I hurry to my bedroom to pack a few clothes.

This is a hasty decision, but I know I need this to pull myself out of this gloom, so there's no point hesitating. At least, it keeps my mind busy while I quickly gather all my mess to the laundry room and throw the empty boxes and cans in the garbage bin. The rest will wait.

On my way to the airport, I have another call with Mike to give him some instructions for the next few days and he dismisses me, saying he knows what he has to do. Well, he's certainly right and I don't worry too much about the club being in his hands. I do have some stuff to do myself, but I have my laptop and can take care of these from a distance. At least, being away from Chicago should do me some good and I truly need it now.

I arrive just in time to catch my flight thanks to a rather fluid traffic in the early afternoon and even have time to grab myself a sandwich before I board the plane. Once settled in my business class seat, I allow myself to relax a bit and eat my lunch.

Throughout the two hours I spend on the plane, the conversation I had with Cam keeps rehearsing in my head. I can already imagine my friends' disappointment if I were to sell the club. After all, I am the one who dragged them into this lifestyle and as per my expectations, they have grown into very good Dominants. Mark and his adorable boys, Shannon and Alex. Josh and his beautiful blonde, Liam. Cam and his chirpy Baby, Noah. They're not perfect, they have their own flaws, but I taught them well and it's no boastfulness. Ivan trained me into dominance with archaic methods and although I use a more modern program to educate the members of my club, I carry out the same values that my late mentor inculcated me in, and that's probably why the Black Diamond is normally a safe place.

I made one big mistake with Andrei, and that's one I wouldn't repeat in the future if I keep the club. He is one of the rare Doms who didn't have to follow the entire course because he had been in the lifestyle for years. I did speak with the Master Dom who trained him back in the days in Detroit and he sounded confident about Andrei's sanity and expertise in BDSM. I also had a conversation with another club owner in Boston who confirmed his former member was reliable. I shouldn't have trusted them. I should have made my own opinion on the man.

And yet, would it have changed a thing? Had I properly trained Andrei, would it have helped him to become a good Dominant? One that isn't fucked up? Would it have helped me to see through his wickedness? I'm not so sure. He was able to deceive me for two years, so he might have done just the same during the regular training.

I learned my lesson, though, and I won't go down that road again. All further members of the Black Diamond will go through the damn training, without one exception. I don't give a fuck if the guy has been in the lifestyle for years or if he brings me dozens of recommendation letters. I don't care if they were members of my club in the past or people I personally know. Follow the training or fucking leave. I might even set up interviews with current Doms and Subs on a regular basis; being clean at some point doesn't mean they will stay clean for the rest of their life. Or perhaps provide refreshers.

And when do you exactly plan to rest, Aaron? I mean... you're already so freaking busy. See how exhausted you are. How will you manage additional sessions in your agenda?

I need help. I need to seriously consider this idea I've had for quite a few months to recruit a second-in-command, someone who could be a co-Master Dom. My three best friends and a few other experienced Doms used to support me a lot with trainings, but everyone has their own busy professional lives. Besides, as far as Mark, Josh and Cam are concerned, now that they have settled down with their respective lovers, I just can't ask them to dedicate more time to the Black Diamond, it wouldn't be fair. No, I need a full-time second-in-command, someone I can trust with both Subs and Doms' training.

My plane lands in La Guardia at 5:45pm and the business class privilege has me out rather quickly with my duffle bag in my hand. Short minutes later, I'm in a cab and headed toward Brooklyn, but with the usual traffic at that time of day, it's a little after 7 when I reach Aiden's club. The driver drops me off at the back of the Blue Hedonism where members of the BDSM club have a private access. My visit is expected so Stan, Aiden's security manager, is waiting for me there and leads me right away to my friend's office at the same time as pizzas are delivered.

"Perfect sync!" Aiden cheers after some warm greetings.

"The plane was on time for once and the traffic wasn't that heavy from La Guardia, so it all worked well!"

"Great, let's go have dinner!"

"Did you manage to get rid of Zach?" I ask as we settle at the meeting table and open our boxes of pizzas.

"Yeah," he chuckles, "I told him I had work to do so he's having dinner with other friends in the Subs' Room. I just instructed him to meet me at our usual spot at 9, so he'll probably go dance with the other guys until then. It'll give us some time to talk and since I haven't mentioned your visit, it'll be a nice surprise for him," he then adds with a wink.

"Hopefully it will be... Thanks for welcoming me at your place in any case!" I say with sincerity.

"You're more than welcome! And Zach adores you, so I have no doubt he'll enjoy the surprise. You know how he is..."

"Oh yeah, I know..." I chuckle, smiling at the image of the kinky blonde forming in my head. Zach and his obsession with threesomes. Foursomes. Moresomes. Basically anything that involves plenty of people having sex with him and his Daddy. "Thanks anyway."

"It seems like your decision to take a vacation was quickly made and rather rushed. You know you can trust me with whatever is wrong, right?" Aiden then says meaningfully.

I truly know that. We share the same job and prone the same values. Confidentiality is one of them, but I won't breech anything by giving him small details. Anyway, the news might reach the media at some point when Andrei gets caught.

"I've been thinking about quitting the lifestyle and selling the club," I blurt out bluntly.

"Such a bad joke!" Aiden laughs out but from the seriousness on my face, he quickly realizes I'm not kidding here. "I still don't believe you. Not you. Unless you've gone straight, which I doubt and not that it'd change a thing, or have found a soulmate who hates the lifestyle, I won't believe you," he then adds sternly.

"Neither, nor, but I'm not joking, Aiden."

For the next half hour, I tell him about Noah's abduction in July, the investigation run by Tony that led nowhere, the absence of evidence although we were sure there was a link to the club after his chipped collar was severed from his neck and found, then Chris's suicide and all the messages he left, in a letter to me, an email to Camden and a phone call to Liam, Joshua's Sub. This is what got us to save Noah and find out that a Dominant member of the Black Diamond was involved.

I tell him about Jeremy, the other Submissive who disappeared about a year and half ago in weird conditions despite the farewell letter he left to his Dominant, Gary. Noah's recue happened in a turmoil of events. Camden was first there; that dumbass thought he could handle Andrei on his own, but he got shot by one of the guards, and unfortunately, the rest of us arrived too late. Andrei managed to flee and when Noah more or less recovered his spirits and told us the devil had escaped with a certain Jeremy, they were already far away. Since then, the police have taken over the investigation, but Jer is still missing.

"Wow... You should have told me... Maybe Tanner could help in a way..." Aiden says cautiously when I'm done talking.

Tanner is one of his friends and another Sadist Dominant. I don't know him very well, but from the few times I met him, I've had my guesses that he is some sort of sociopath. The guy is cold, which in itself doesn't make him unpleasant, but his partaking into conversations sometimes sounds fake, for lack of a better word. Yet, the guy works for the NYPD and I've heard he's really good at what he's doing.

"Not sure CPD would be glad to see a cop from New York barge in their affairs. They've already tried to involve the FBI in their investigations, but the motherfucker is just too clever for our own sake," I reply dejectedly. "I swear I hate myself... I should have noticed something was off earlier. Jeremy was abducted seventeenth months ago and that bastard never stopped visiting the club, playing with my babies and laughing in our face the whole time!"

"Okay, I get your guilt, but... is that why you want to quit everything?" Aiden asks, quite dumbfounded.

"Well, that's kind of a good reason. I fucked up here."

"Bullshit. If that motherfucker is so good, I don't see how you could have noticed anything. It's not your fault, Aaron!"

"That's what everybody says, but I still feel responsible."

"Understandable, but that's no reason for quitting what's been your life for so many years. You need it more than anything else, don't make any hasty decisions. We all fuck up at some point. This lifestyle is serious but no matter how good we are, we are all bound to face evil persons one day or another. That should only make us move on and be more cautious in the future, but it shouldn't prevent us from keeping at it. I'll tell you a story that happened to me about two years ago, to show you I felt the same guilt, and it implies Zach..."

Aiden then tells me the story of a Sub who was in an abusive relationship with his Dom, the latter not respecting the Sub's limits and safewords. A few months passed until Zach noticed something was off and warned Aiden about it. It turns out that the Sub had been abused for some time and Aiden hadn't seen anything despite all the surveillance in the club. Things went really bad and after the bad Dom was banned from the club, he kidnapped Zach and tortured him as a revenge and to find out where his former Sub had been hidden.

"Trust me, I went through a really bad time. I hated myself for not having seen anything either, but with Zach disappearing, it got only worse. Yet, I didn't back off. That only strengthened my strictness to double check everything and to reinforce the policies of the club. Don't give up, Aaron. You belong in the lifestyle, so you need to fight that..." Aiden says with determination.

"I see your point, but this has been such a low blow."

"Think about it longer before you make a stupid decision. Besides, you truly look exhausted and you probably need that break to get back to your senses."

"That's what Camden told me. He's the one who suggested a little visit here..."

"Camden's a genius then! It was an excellent idea and I'm sure Zach will help you feel better," he smirks.

"Cam's exact thoughts," I chuckle. "Thanks for everything, Aiden. I'll definitely think things over a bit more. The Diamond doesn't reopen before the end of next week in any case, so I have time. Now maybe we should go get ready?"

"Yup! It's almost time for the Blue Hedonism to open. Let's go to my playroom to change!" Aiden says as we both stand up and clear the table from the pizza boxes.

"I'll need a quick shower."

"The shower in my playroom is large enough for two... or more..." he replies in a smug tone.

"Fine with me, Master Dom! Just don't count on me to pick up the soap bar."

"Too bad... Fucking Doms is so good!" Aiden replies with mock remorse.

"Yeah, I know you enjoy your trainees as much as I do mine!" I laugh out. "But I'm no trainee, so forget it!"

"Okay, got it... Damn! I hope Zach's ready!"

"Has he ever not been?" I ask, wiggling my eyebrows.

"Hmm... When he's on a sex strike. But it never lasts for long," Aiden chuckles.

Once I have signed the usual NDA form for guests, Aiden and I go to his playroom where we take a quick shower together – a chaste one, so fangirls may calm down. We then dress up in similar leather pants and combat boots, all the while discussing what we could do to his Baby tonight. We also prepare what we will need for the scene before we go to the main room of the club.

It is slightly after 8pm now and Zach is nowhere to be seen, certainly taking his sweet time with his friends in the Subs' Room, so we grab some soft drinks at the bar and go settle at his usual area. I sit down next to Aiden on one of the couches and we engage in a general conversation while we wait for the blond twink. Aiden tells me about his friends, whom I know from previous visits.

Ethan, his best friend who visited the Black Diamond in June had a great professional opportunity and is now the CEO of a huge company in fashion. He and his Submissive Anthony are bound to travel a lot from now on and I'm certain they'll fully enjoy Ethan's private jet for kinky activities. From an article Joshua recently found online and shared with me, I know that the couple also went through a rough patch last June, well mostly Anthony. I'm glad to hear that the young man has now recovered from the trauma he endured and is feeling better.

William, another of Aiden's good friends and the funniest one in my opinion, seems to be in the process of settling down with a special someone too, slowly bringing his boy into the lifestyle. The young man is currently finishing his training and will spend his first official evening at the Blue Hedonism on Saturday, so I might postpone my return to Sunday to see this.

And then Tanner... Tanner the Sadist. Tanner the cop. Weirdly enough, I sense a certain hostility on Aiden's side when I ask how he has been doing. His body suddenly stiffens and his eyes darken with a mix of emotions. Anger? Remorse? Guilt? Hesitation?

"Let's say that Tanner fucked up recently," he grunts.

"That bad?" I enquire, quite perplexed by his icy tone.

"Long story short?"

"Go ahead..."

Without providing me with full and private details, Aiden tells me that Tanner breeched a strict and specific condition he had imposed on his friend for personal reasons and that he had to pull out his full Master Dom to rectify the situation. I already knew that Tanner was forbidden to perform a scene with a Sub from the club off cameras, but there was more, and the mistake he made was more serious than a simple transgression. I'm quite flabbergasted to hear how far it went though, and to be honest, my first thought is that Aiden went beyond his own rights.

However, just thinking about what happened at the Black Diamond quickly throws me in his shoes, and had I been in his place, I would have certainly reacted in the same way. More or less. The safety of our clubs – and even more so of our Subs – will always prevail and if it means resorting to drastic measures, then so be it.

I'd never ask Aiden for a confirmation, but the more I hear about Tanner, the more I'm persuaded that the guy is a sociopath and although he sounds in pretty good control of his urges, I can totally understand my friend's near-paranoid surveillance on the Sadist.

What if Cam had been a sociopath, Ron? Would you have operated such a level of control on him? Would you have taken him to his limits?

I definitely would. Camden is one of my closest friends, one of twenty-five years, but had he been a sociopath, I wouldn't have allowed him to settle down with Noah or anyone else without operating a high level of control. Not to bother him, but for his own sake. Because I love him too much to allow him to get into trouble.

Had he done what Tanner did and lost my trust, yes, I would have pushed him to his limits as well. This would have been the only way to try his repentance, to see if he truly cared, to regain my trust. Above all, it would have been a sine qua non to ever set a foot again inside my club. Like I said, safety first.

Now, that's quite nonsense because Cam is no psychopath and although he has serious anger-management issues, I believe he has reached a good level of self-control. At least for now. However, I don't know what the future will bring, so I will never stop keeping a close watch over him.

Anyway, our conversation suddenly drops when Aiden points out a cute little blond head walking through the entrance of the Blue Hedonism. The boisterous boy is followed by several other Subs and apparently headed toward the dancefloor, but he stops dead in his tracks when he instinctively peeks in our direction. The earlier eagerness sprayed over his face morphs into immediate mischievousness. I see him briefly whisper something into one of his friends' ears and the next second, he makes his way toward our couch, head lowered but a nice grin across his lips. Almost as nice as the bulge forming at the front of his tiny shorts.

"Hi, Daddy!!" he says as he graciously kneels between Aiden's open legs.

Zach hates kneeling on the floor. Zach actually hates a lot of things in the lifestyle, but he knows to behave as a perfect Sub when there's a reward at stake. The Master title is one of his limits, exactly like Pet is another, so this is no wonder these two are in a Daddy / Baby kink.

"It's not 9 yet, Baby... What are you doing here already?" Aiden replies innocently, looking at his blond head with a lot of fondness.

"I saw you have a guest, Daddy... And not just any guest..." he replies mischievously. "So, I thought I should come and say hi."

"Forget about the come part for now, Baby, but you can definitely greet Aaron," Aiden says playfully.

"Good evening, Master Aaron!" Zach then cheers, raising his head and smiling at me brightly. Someone is determined to please tonight!

"Good evening, Bunny!" I reply, using the nickname I always use to address him when we meet... and play together.

I can't help remembering the first time I met the boy and called him Pet. Well, I didn't know about that hard-limit back then, but I did see how he didn't like it. Bunny fits him well in any case, always fucking like a rabbit with his Daddy.

"You know you can call me Sir..."

"Thank you, Sir! Seeing you here is a wonderful surprise I wasn't expecting, and I hope you're willing to play with Daddy and me tonight," he says, lowering his head.

"It was a hasty decision I took this afternoon, but I'm glad to hear it makes you happy. And I will certainly play with you and your Daddy if you agree."

"I'd never refuse a threesome with two Master Doms!" he replies, almost rolling his eyes. "Daddy, can we play with Master Aaron?"

"Certainly, Baby. Though... keep rolling your eyes and we'll be the only ones to enjoy this," Aiden warns him, more or less playfully.

Aiden is sometimes considered as a lenient Dominant in the sense that Zach is boisterous and often gets his way with him, but the reality is completely different. My friend has his own limits and Zach knows to respect them.

"Actually, Aaron will be staying with us for a few days."

"At our loft?" Zach exclaims with hope.

"At our loft, indeed. You'll have two Master Doms to yourself, Baby..."

"Oh my God... That's awesome!!! Thank you, Daddy!! Thank you, Master Aaron!!"

"You're welcome, Bunny," I chuckle as fond memories of a similar trio flash back inside my head.

Or what could have been a nice trio, to be more precise. It's funny how Kayden's remembrance imposes itself tonight. Perhaps is it because we recently met again? Or is it because my New York friend's name sounds a lot like the one I had in Los Angeles? Whatever it is, I can't help further memories of moments I shared with Kayden and Orion to pop in my thoughts and I think the next few days with Aiden and Zach might be fun indeed.

"Expect to be used and abused, Baby. And you'd better be on your best behavior because Aaron will have every right to punish you if needed."

"I'll be perfect, Daddy! I can even cook breakfast while you two laze in bed together and bring it to you!" Zach cheers, which makes us burst out laughing. I know how Zach hates cooking!

"We'll see about that. In the meantime, you should go and greet our guest properly," Aiden replies suggestively. "What do you think, Aaron?"

"Sounds like a great idea," I say, palming my erection through the fabric of my pants before I undo the buttons at the front and free my soldier.

Zach doesn't need further instructions and he immediately crawls seductively between my legs before he swallows my length in his mouth. Oh fuck! That piercing on his tongue does wonders on my shaft and I quickly manage to push away all the bad thoughts at the back of my head.

My worries and doubts are still here, but I'm sure this cute little blond head and his handsome Daddy will help me to relax over the next few days. I can already feel some of the tension leaving my body as Zach bobs up and down, swirling his tongue over the most sensitive areas of my cock and insisting on my piercing. Even if I have a thought for Jeremy, Zach's skills do allow me to tame the gloom in my head. It doesn't mean I won't change my mind about the club so soon, but I will give it some serious thought.

BDSM has been my life for almost twelve years now and this is what saved me from a doomed future. I was a lost soul. Not because of what could have been a traumatic experience when I turned 17, but because I had run away from a zealously catholic family, refusing my best friends' help. Los Angeles. The City Of Angels. Homelessness, drugs, prostitution; there, they became my sad reality.

Until Ivan happened. My savior, my guardian, my... Dominant, my mentor.

Ivan introduced me to his lifestyle and offered me to discover a world I delved into, first as his Submissive, but with a powerful determination to one day follow his footsteps. In Los Angeles, I found a new life. New goals. A new future. A new family. If I painfully missed my best friends while in L.A., I now miss all these people who provided me with the support I needed back then. Ivan. Anton. Marcus. Sam. Kayden. And many more... All these Subs of the Hell Fire I cherished so dearly, Subs I mingled with during my own phase of submission.

Yes, BDSM is the story of my life; the one environment in which my rebirth occurred.

How could I leave this world I have grown to love so much?

Can I even abandon a lifestyle that saved me?

Probably not, and the simple reason is that BDSM is my life. It is a part of who I am and it's what shaped the man I have become. I just can't live without it. That would mean giving up on my life. One that was never all rainbow and unicorns, but still one that's worth living.

My name is Aaron Cox, I'm 29, and I'm going to tell you the story of my life.

Published on 6 February 2019

This was a freaking long introduction, but there you have it! I thought that this specific period of gloom was the best for Aaron to dive back into his past; from the half-chapter in his POV in Twisted Moon, we knew that he was kind of depressed and that guilt was already eating him. Don't worry, it won't last for too long since we know that Jeremy was found on the Friday of that same week and that the club won't be sold either.

In this chapter, you also get a little crossover with Fhanth 's series and of course, you will get details of the end of Aaron's visit later, when we reach this part of the timeline again. It wasn't done on purpose, but funnily enough, Tanner's story is close to reach this specific timeline too (if I remember well, just a few more chapters in The Song Of The Phoenix).

Anyway, the next chapter will take us back to October 10th, 2001, the day Aaron turned 16, so be prepared to walk into the Master Dom and his friends' past, and remember that back then, they were not the men you know from the previous books.

I will try to have chapter one ready by sometime next week ;)