ive come to an epiphany: im...content. im happy with my life.

i read all these angsty posts online and...i feel like ive grown out of that mindset. 12-15 ish, that awkward age where youre still growing and discovering yourself...it's hard. youre confused. you dont know who you are or what you are.

i went through that and came out on the other side, and im pretty content. i was driving to school and it hit me very suddenly- im one year away from being an adult, being in 'the real world.' i almost felt fearful and then..i didnt. i calmed down.

so what? im ready for my life. im ready to keep moving. im comfortable with the person i am. hey, im not the best, but im working on that, and that's all that matters. my skin isnt the best, but im comfortable in it.

i have my low days, but above all, im ok. im just taking it easy through life, cracking jokes and doing what i love.

we had to write an obituary for ourselves in creative writing. i...i wasnt sad. i read my joke-laden, heartfelt testimony of my future life with a grin. im cool. im happy with myself, despite my flaws.

i dont think im afraid of being an adult. im gonna face the next chapter of my life with an open mind. theres nothing i can do to change it, so why worry?
it worries me when i see ppl constantly belittling themselves and the things they create. dont do that. work on those feelings. no amount of skill will ever make you happy. never. ever. learn to embrace the "you" you are rn and stop wanting to change yourself into something youre not. this is the only self you have, and you gotta learn to love it. it's hard, but thats what makes your life happy. 

sorry for the sudden deep-ness on a garbage book with drawings of cute boys, but ive been Feeling