I sat in my bed, fiddling with the phone in my fingers as I stared at the black screen, my dark reflection staring back at me. Gazing at myself, I frowned a little bit and brushed some stray silver bangs into place. I lifted the phone, still staring into the screen, and offered my reflection a small, unsure smile. The same face looked back at me, the blue eyes crinkling a little to try and hide the giddy nervousness inside me. I frowned again, not liking it. I shook my hair a little and gave the screen the brightest smile I could muster, but it still looked nervous.

Why was this making me act so strange?

I mean, I could guess why, but this was different. After last night's confession, it was probably only natural. I had known for a long time that I had loved him, but I had had no idea how he felt in return. Now I knew, or at least, I though I knew. He had said that he loved me. It felt deeper than just as friends or family members.

My face turned silly as I grinned from ear to ear and plopped backwards onto the bed, lifting the phone above my head and tapping the screen playfully. "You are one lucky girl," I said to my reflection with a bigger smile.

My reflection continued to grin back at me for a few moments, before something drastically. The girl staring back at me seemed to change right before my eyes. Slowly, her expression grew darker, her features growing grim until I was staring at an entirely different version of myself, one that I recognized all to well anyways. Her blue eyes looked almost grey as they sagged with dark circles, my face looking pale despite the black screen. I looked so dull and lifeless, but in my eyes there was a deep, traumatic sadness, with fear creeping at the corners. I almost dropped the phone as my real body stared back in shock.

"Are you really?" the girl that was myself said back at me, her voice the dark and traumatized version of my own. She began to fade into the darkness of the screen, sending my heart into terrified loops. "Or are you always going to be captured by yourself and those that hate you?" myself echoed as she was swallowed away.

I gasped sharply, trying to drop the phone and flee, but it was like I was frozen in place. My spark felt like it was going a thousand miles a minute my body trembled horribly. Before I could even make another sound, the darkness of the screen suddenly turned into a whirling vortex that swallowed my real body as well. I screamed as I found myself hurtling into the black abyss of my own trauma, clawing towards the light that I was being pulled away from. Everything turned hollow quickly and I was suddenly still, floating in an endless nothing.

No, it wasn't nothing. It felt like I was floating, but not freely. It was as if I was underwater, the pressure making my bones ache and my muscles cry out. I grit my teeth as I began to panic, wishing I could escape my own mind. My eyes scanned for anything other than the darkness, but I couldn't find a single piece of light.

"You're trapped forever," my voice echoed around me, ringing in my ears and making my whole body vibrate. "No one can free you now."

The make believe world suddenly rattled heavily, sending my body into agony as I writhed and screamed. It spun me around and around and around until I was once again floating in that heavy air, but it wasn't all darkness anymore. I could sense that something was coming, and I dared open my eyes again and look.

Terror flooded my heart and spark and I screamed once more as clawed, thin digits outstretched towards me. Slowly, a shape made it's way out of the darkness as the talons reached for me in near slow motion. The grey seeker seemed like he was being pushed towards me in the darkness, his grin haunting me as his bright red optics shone with ambition and murder. My voice died in my throat and I tried to thrash away, but it was as if I was stuck in that one place. His terrible laugh filled the darkness as those digits wrapped around my body, the weight making my lose my breath as he nearly crushed me. I grabbed the digits and grit my teeth, trying to pull myself out as tears squeezed out of my tightly shut eyes.

Starscream said nothing as he other servo wrapped around me as well and he slowly drew me closer to his faceplate. Screams returned to me as I drew closer to those red optics, closer and closer still. My body thrashed and flung itself almost on its own, but I knew I couldn't escape. My screams tore at my throat as I was sucked into that horrible light, pain piercing through my body. What was this?!

The blood curling red spun me around and swallowed me up, like a sink draining all the water. I tumbled this way and that in what seemed like an endless color that had no walls, until I felt as if I had suddenly hit hard ground. My breath was thrust from my lungs in one motion as my chest and legs throbbed in pain. As soon as it returned to me, I was left gasping for air, sobbing slightly as I tried to push myself up.

I should have stayed down.

When I looked up, the same red was staring at me, but this time in the form of one circular optic. My heart stopped and all efforts to run or scream left me in a brush of wind. My eyes were wide and twitching as I saw one servo, equipped with horribly sharp and calculated digits reaching for me, ready to poke and prod. The upper half of the mech's chassis slowly came into view, his dark purple nearly matching the thick darkness around us. Shockwave made no sound as his needle like digits finally reached me, the sharp point pricking my chest. I let out a gasp of pain, and all over again my terror reached the heights of crying out. I tried to scramble backwards as his servo drew back for only a moment. He followed up by jutting his servo forward sharply, two digits grabbing the upper part of my arm. Sobbing and screaming, I could do nothing as he pierced through my flesh and forced my spark chamber open.

He began his work, and all over again I was under torture.

"No one can save you," my own voice told me. This time I saw my other self standing off to the side, her face looking dead and depressed as she hugged herself, her hand tracing the same place where my spark chamber was. Her eyes were completely gray as they bore into me. "No one can save you," she repeated, "not even him."

I was suddenly warped away again, once more floating in the blanket of black. My breath coming out in short, panicked gasps, I swung my head left and right, frantically searching for the next predator that would pounce at me. Instead, I felt a brush of calm for a brief second and looked up. My spark lifted, my body felt like it was washed by still waters, when I saw that my guardian was now standing over me. Despite how big he was, looming over me, it wasn't like the Decepticons. I knew this was the stance of protection. More tears flooded my eyes as I gazed up at Ratchet, my lips turning up in relief. His optics fell down to me, a gentle smile reaching his derma.

"Not even him," the voice whispered, just touching my ear before it was completely gone.

And then it was all torn away from me again. Ratchet cried out in agony as Starscream suddenly appeared behind him, his servo slamming into his back, the digits cutting into the metal. My heart dropped to the floor while my spark seemed to scream from inside me. Wind thrust me away and I cried out, reaching for my guardian that was now falling into an endless pit. His faceplate looked terrified as he fell, and then the darkness swallowed him. I came next, the thick air wrapping around me and sucking me into the next realm of my vision.

Now I was frozen in midair, unable to move a single part of me, as I watched Ratchet battling Shockwave. The brawny Decepticon was sidestepping his blade with ease, his heavy arms slamming him back each time the medic tried to attack. Ratchet didn't manage to make a single blow, while Shockwave was pinning him into a corner. My guardian grit his denta so hard I heard the metal grinding, his optic wide, shining with both fury and fear. The purple Con struck him against the helm and sent him to the ground. As the Autobot reeled in shock and pain on his knee plates, Shockwave raised his cannon. My voice finally returned, but could only manage a strange guttural sound as I heard him fire. A bright purple filled my sight, the only sound Ratchet's dying cry as I was swept away yet again.

Then there was complete silence, and I was still. My chest felt like something had crushed it several times as I looked around. It was really all I could do. Whatever this was, I had no control over it. What was it trying to tell me?

"He will die," a different voice said, one that rattled me to my very core. It was piercing like a knife and heavy like flames, stabbing me and burning me from the inside out. My body swung around as I stared in terror at the warlord's blood red optics. "As will the rest of your precious family," he spat with a horrible sneer, his sharp denta stained with red.

I couldn't utter a sound, twitch a single muscle, as the scene before me slowly grew out of darkness. Megatron stood triumphantly, his helm lifted high as he glared coldly below him. At his pedes were the dead chassis of the Autobots. Almost all of Team Prime was there, their optic grey and lifeless, wide forever in a frozen moment of terror. My heart beat a thousand miles a minute as I saw my guardian on top of the pile, laying on his back as his helm hung backwards as he was sprawled out on the pile of bodies. His optics fluttered open, the beautiful light now dull and flickering as he winced in pain.

Megatron grinned maliciously as he began to bend over, his optics filled with murder and death. His expression revealed that he was enjoying every moment of this, pleasure filling his entire chassis like a drug. His huge claws stretched out towards Ratchet, and I wanted to scream, but I still couldn't move. The Autobot medic jumped a little when the Con's digits grabbed his throat, beginning to squeeze almost immediately. Ratchet reached up, his faceplate scrunched up in pain as he grabbed Megatron's wrists and tried to pry him away. This only urged the silver titan to squeeze harder, his derma twisted up in a sadistic smile. Ratchet choked and struggled against him, but was too weak to make much of a difference. 

Megatron's optics slowly slid upwards as he stared straight into my eyes, like he was searching every part of me. "You can see it, can't you? You are forever imprisoned by your fears. They will swallow you whole, after taking the Autobots from you in the worst possible ways." His digits pushed into Ratchet's neck even harder, the sharp points beginning to cut through the metal protection.

Ratchet, losing the fight as his optics began to fade, looked at me only once. I screamed in that one moment, louder than I felt I ever had before, in all my years of torture and catastrophic events. It tore at my throat, at my flesh, causing it to flare up in raw pain as darkness flooded into my vision again, taking me away only a second later and hurtling me towards and endless abyss.

"Taylor!"

The voice tugged me back to reality harshly, my body feeling like it had been snapped like a rubber band. My eyes flew open as I sat up sharply, my body in a cold sweat as I panted heavily. Everything was shaking as I looked around my room, my heart hammering in my chest. I tried to make sense of what I had just saw, but when I looked back, I almost locked up and fell backwards again.

"Taylor?!" came my grandmother's voice from downstairs. "Are you awake? An ambulance is pulling up outside-"

I didn't listen to the rest of the sentence. Before I even knew what I was doing, I jumped out of bed, hurtling myself forward despite my weak knees. My body felt both achy and weak, and rushed and stronger than anything as I ran down the stairs, skipping steps and nearly falling forwards. My grandmother was in nearing the door, freezing up when she heard me coming. I saw her turn with wide, confused eyes before I zoomed past her. She called my name, but it was lost to me as I swung the door open, faltering a little from my sudden burst of speed. I paused at the now open doorway, holding the door and gasping for breath as I looked out into the dirt driveway.

I can't ever express how much I needed to see him in that moment. All the demons inside my head seemed to disappear when I saw the ambulance braking on the gravel. In just a few seconds, he had stopped completely, turning his engine off. His holoform threw the door open and he hurried out quickly, slamming the door shut behind him. I realized when I saw his features, extremely worried and terrified, that he knew. His spark knew how I felt. How much I needed him to take me back. 

He knew that I was tearing myself up from the inside out.

"Taylor!" he shouted loudly when his eyes found me, his voice lined with panic. He stepped away from his real body quickly and began to hurry my way.

A sob burst from behind my lips, tears falling down my cheeks as I pushed off of the door and ran for him at top speed. I reached him before he had even made it halfway to the house, jumping into him and wrapping my arms around him as I buried my head into his shoulder and burst into more sobs.

He stood frozen and stiff for a moment, surprised and a little unsure. I felt him soften, a small sigh leaving his chest. His arms wrapped around me quickly but carefully, his consoling hands rubbing my back and holding me close as he pulled me into him. My chest hiccupped back and forth from crying as I squeezed him tighter. He did the same, his arms hugging me so tight I felt as if I could never get away. He bent his head forward, burying his face into my hair. We were now hugging to closely that I had no doubt in my mind that I was safe.

My entire body relaxed, my sobs turning into small gasps and hiccups. My spark sang with relief, and all fears that had been welling into my heart were washed away by the sense of love and security that flowed from Ratchet's spark. He continued to rub my back gently as he hugged me tight, not saying a word. He didn't need to; this was what I had required.

Mom, I whispered in my head. It will probably take some more time, but I know now that if I stay with him, I will finally be free.

~

WOW, that was a lot longer than I thought it would be.

HEY LOOK I UPDATED!!! YA HAPPY? :D

Really, I'm sorry this took me so long. I wish I had gotten to it sooner. I really enjoyed writing this chapter, it was so full of feelings and heart!! AAAAAAH I love it.

Also, I encourage you to listen to the song!! I know it's not really a "romance" song, but I feel like it fits this chapter well! Sorry for a couple curse words, though...

Guys, give me feedback!! I love hearing what you guys have to say about this book. If you have any suggestions on how to make it better, I'm all ears!!!

*waves*