Chapter 6

"Can you please just go away? Nanahimik ako at ginugulo mo lang ang buhay mo."

"Hindi ako aalis dito," aniya. Napataas ang kilay ko sa sinabi niya. 

Siya na nga itong kusang pumasok sa loob ng apartment ko at umupo sa sofa, siya pa 'tong may ganang maging masungit sa harapan ko.

"If you're just going to make me give you the sweatshirt, hindi ako uto-uto para gawin 'yon." Humalukipkip ako at saka ko siya inirapan. "Pwede bang umalis ka na? Magpapahinga pa ako."

Pero nginisihan lang ako nito. "Ang sungit mo naman."

"Pagdating sa 'yo, oo," sagot ko.

Nilingon ako nito saka napakunot ang noo. "Why? Am I annoying? Do I annoy you when I just needed something?"

I squinted my eyes. "And there you, sa 'yo na mismo nanggaling. Umuwi ka na lang sa girlfriend mo. He might be looking for you now. Ako pa sisihin kung may makakita na nandito ka sa apartment ko, sabihin pa nila kung ano-ano. Don't me, Griffin. Don't make my last year in college be ruined."

"I'm not trying to ruin your college life," he said. "I just wanna be friends with you, that's all."

Umiling ako saka ako tuluyang lumapit sa kanya para hatakin ko siya patayo sa sofa. Mabigat siya at hindi ko magawang mai-angat man lang ang pwet niya sa kinauupuan niya. Nang sa tingin ko na wala iyong kwenta, I gave up at saka ako napahawak na lamang sa baywang ko.

"Okay, I'll be listening," aniko. "Anong proposal ba ang gusto mo?"

I looked at him straight and wait for what he would say. But then he just stood up and shrugged off.

"Nevermind," he uttered. "I have other things to do. Thanks for inviting me."

My eyes widened and scoffed about what he said. "Kapal ng mukha! I didn't even invite you to come in. At mabuti pa nga, if you have no other things to say, it's better for you to leave my apartment."

He grinned as he walked towards the door and before he could even leave, he looked at me and winked. Parang biglang nag-screenshot ang buo kong katawan nang gawin niya iyon sa akin. Nandiri ako bigla at saka ko mabilis na isinara ang pinto nang makalabas siya.

Napabitaw na lamang ako nang malalim na hininga nang mawala siya sa paningin ko. Wala akon ibang pagsasabihan na dumayo 'yan si Griffin dito sa bahay ko, because I know it would cause an issue.

I don't want anyone else to find out that Griffin and I talked.

Tahimik ang buhay ko. I just don't want him to mess it up.

Before I couldn take a rest, ginawa na ang mga dapat kong gawin at linisin ang dapat linisin. As I was on bed, resting, I got a message from Caleb--my admirer--who I don't even know personally.

"Hey..." he messaged.

"Hi, Caleb! It's been sometime! How are you?" I replied.

"Well, I'm good. Having fun. What about you?"

"I'm feeling glad now... and means of fun... do you think we'll be able to meet? Since the last time we were about to do it, you had an emergency and you weren't able to go at my place. What do you think?"

"Hm... I'll think about it."

"You know, it'll be happy for us to finally meet each other in person. I don't even know your social media. Do you mind sharing them with me so I can finally see your face?"

"I don't have social media," he replied.

"Oh... what about video call now?"

"Do you really want to see my face? Does it matter? And if you saw an ugly man right in front of your screen, you wouldn't ever talk to me."

"Well, that's not what I was thinking though..." 

"So, it should be fine that I'm faceless to you now," he responded.

Hindi ko naman alam kung paano ko siya pipilitin. kung hindi niya talaga gusto, hindi ko na iinsist sa kanya 'yon. Sinubukan ko na ring tawagan siya in call, sinagot naman niya pero walang nagsasalita on his end.

He only replies to me on text, but one thing I know, this person is someone going to my college as well. Hindi ko nga lang mahuli-huli kung sino ang nag-iiwan ng mga gifts sa locker ko.

Krisa and I tried doing that pero wala naman kaming naabutan no'n. It seems like someone knows that we're there and wouldn't do such thing to blow up his cover.

"But maybe... you could explain to me what you look like? You know, something I could imagine..."

"Think of your favorite celebrity, that would be me."

"That's... that's not helping so... whatever. But if you think we would be able to meet soon, just let me know. I'll be happy to see you in person... and talk to you."

"I'll be happy as well," he responded. "I gotta see you soon..."

When our texting ended, napatingin na lamang ako sa kisame at nag-imagine kung anong hitsura nito ni Caleb. Naalala ko rin iyong gabi na inakala ng parents ko na si Griffin ay si Caleb at sinakyan naman no'ng mokong na 'yo ang nangyayari. I didn't even get to explain to my parents that the person who joined us on dinner wasn't the person who they supposed to be meeting with.

Buti na lang, hindi sila nagtanong afterwards about him. Dahil kung hindi, lalong guguho ang mundo ko.

When I was about to sleep, nakapikit na ang mata ko nang bigla kong maramdamang nag-vivibrate ang phone ko. May tumatawag na unknown number kaya naman sinagot ko. But then mabilis kong inilayo ito sa tainga ko dahil halo-halong ingay ng lalaki ang bumungad sa akin do'n.

I was about to end the call when I heard Griffin's name over the line and then after that, the call just ended after forty five seconds. Gulong-gulo ako kung anong meron, but I let it go dahil baka nagkamali lang iyon.

I don't need to think about Griffin all throughout the night. Please lang, sana hanggang sa panaginip ko hindi niya ako guluhin!