Chapter-25

No one knows the heart and its magic with dealing with emotions.

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Neel's pov:

Nothing can hurt the cunning heart it's always been the kind one that has suffered all the damage.

It's been two days since I left her home and started wandering on the streets.

The biggest fault of my life is to not do what I have done on the time. I should have taken a stand. 

However, one important thing is left to do yet.

I took out the borrowed cell phone which I have taken from one of my staff members  and called Samuel, "give me her location!"

'Not you now!" I heard him whispering. I could imagine him rolling his eyes and cursing me under his breath. And why not? I deserve all this!

I have failed to complete what I started. I have failed to end the beginning which was created due to my fault.

"What do you mean?" I cleared my throat.

"I am not living with her! " I heard him shouting from the other side of the cell phone.

Sam got eloped with Sarah when Sarah made him realise that she has fallen in love with him.

However, later Samuel realised it was all his plan. She used him to know my location. To know what I am up to. To know where I am living. To know where I have done after leaving California.

Samuel and I got close like brothers when Julia left. He somehow managed my temper and advised me to do the right thing. He guided me when I was at the stage of dying by drinking alcohol. Yes, for several days, I used to drink too much to forget every sin that I have done. I was being a jerk at that time but it didn't last long. And I am glad that it didn't.

Samuel soon realised when Julia left that it was I, for whom she was serious about and it was I, who loved her before even knowing her.

However, I didn't know Sarah was here in Delhi when Sam is in California.

What the hell is she doing here alone?

Sam told me she told him that she came here to visit a close friend but we all know it didn't land well for her.

She came to find me. She used Samuel to reach me. I thought she has finally accepted that I don't care for her, I don't feel for her, and such things cannot be pushed over to anyone.

But I have never thought after being pregnant with Sam's child she would still be venomous to everyone.

She told Julia that I am her child's father?

I regret the moment when I started talking to her. I regret everything, every second, every moment I have spent with her.

When  Sam asked me  Why I am in the need of her address. I told him everything. At least, he needs to know what Sarah has been doing behind his back.

I asked Sam to be peaceful and steady after she is pregnant with his child and I don't want to be the reason for the quarrel between them.

I was still walking on the streets in the same clothes that I wore two days back with nothing in my mind. I was clueless about my journey. I don't want to go to California back. It's like a prison to me. It has always been. Everything is so foreign and strange there. After my mother's death, I went there because my so-called father insisted to do so.  Otherwise, I wouldn't have gone there.

But when I saw Julia for the first time, I felt like I have found my home after several years. Her presence was enough to make me warm still I hurt her like a maniac.

God, I hate myself too much.

I was walking passing by the roads, seeing everything this city has to offer from the wealthy society to the miserable one's.

Nothing can divide humanity. We all are equal before the law, we will be equal always.

The sky was in the deep blue shade just the way she adores with her deep eyes.

This is the time duration when I felt the thunderstorms bursting the clouds then it started raining. It always rains whenever I think about her.

Does the universe have any conspiracy between my attentiveness?

Moreover, I walked and walked even it was raining, even when my clothes were all damped stuck to my skin, even when I was dying from the cold, even when I am anxious about all the storms. Because from inside I am burning; burning like hell. Burning because my heart is on my fire and nothing can stop it from getting simmered.

I knocked on her door, she opened it in a minute. 

I saw her image after three years. Her eyes were pale as she hasn't slept in the past days, her huge belly was telling me she has crossed more than the five months of her pregnancy.

I wanted to raise my voice to her, I wanted to shout at her and make her realise she doesn't deserve anything. But when I saw the marks on her cheeks and her dead tears on her fragile skin made I change my temper.

I did nothing.

I said nothing.

I only stared at her for a second then I left. I heard her calling out my name but I didn't listen to her.

I don't know where I am going.  My cell phone is dead. I have no clue If I am going to be alive or dead if I am going to make it alive from here.

The night is turning darker and darker. My cold clothes were piercing my skin from the soul, maybe I needed it.

I have no purpose to begin and end, somehow, I reached the vacant garden where no one was there and I found myself resting on one of the benches which subsisted there.

***

The next day I woke up to the voices of some policemen.

When I saw them they were standing beside and they had special orders from the government if they ever find a stranger walking by alone in the night and spending his night in public places they will arrest them.

As they don't want to have imposters in the country when would ruin the sovereignty and pride of it.

I am well aware of everything, even in these crucial times, I did a mistake again. I shouldn't have made streets my living by when I am not a homeless person.

Or maybe I am?

Do I have anything left? I will not go back to America nor do I stay here because I do not want to hurt her.

By seeing I am clueless of everything. Police arrested me.

"Where the hell where you were?"
I heard Jessica's voice. I have put into minimum security. They have the lowest level of security and are used to house non-violent offenders with a relatively clean background.

I am behind the bars now. She has come here with a lawyer to get me bailed?

What do I say to her now?

She was crying, her eyes were puffy and red as she has been crying for too long.

This shouldn't be the matter of her grief.

Something terrible must have happened to her!

Did Sarah do something?

I shouldn't have given her a clean chit by doing nothing to her. I should have filed a complaint against her regarding her living in a pregnancy stage.

She did everything and within half an hour I was out from the prisoner's room.

Before I could ask and say anything to her, she smacked me hard on my face.
Making my body burn even more from my life venture.

And instead of letting me sob in pain, she started crying again then there was no end to her tears.

"Jessica? What happened? " I asked her in a calming voice, as I do not want to scare her with my damped state of life.

"Julia..."

She was sobbing again and again and I could feel the terrible fear in her eyes, in her body, in her state.

"She would have married till now. Nothing, I think it's our time to go from here," I heard my voice replying to her.

My heart was heavy and its eyes were moist.

I want to let out everything from my heart in tears so that no one could see me in my terrible state anymore.

"She... She is... She is in hospital.."

What the hell she is saying? Why would she be in the hospital?

Didn't she was going to marry Arnav today?

But when I saw Jessica, I realised what she was saying was the absolute truth. 

Suddenly, the earth burned in shame, the land shifted in the colder state, the sun turned black and the sky turned. Blue. I have seen nothing, I have felt nothing.

I didn't know where I am going what I know was Jessica was calling my name and I am running; running again to find my life.
 

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This is everything.

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