After a really long day with the boys on the field, I returned home in a muddy white track and t-shirt. I ran into the house as soon as I arrived to avoid our corny neighbor. If he ever caught me he would start asking about my non-existing love life. His wife riles me more than my lousy room-mate back in Kashmir camps.

I entered my room which is on the first floor. I slumped on the bed with all the dirty clothes. I was aimlessly staring at the wall. I couldn't stop myself from envying my friend's life while we are chucking ball after the match. He was speaking about his girlfriend how he met her and how ambitious she is! The way he narrated his love story and how did they manage to get engaged was really interesting and inspiring.

After hearing his story all of a sudden I found the urge to find someone for me like he found his girlfriend. But deep down I know this isn't the right way to do so. Love doesn't come just because someone else has experienced it.

Above all, I am a soldier serving at the borders. There is no guarantee I am going to return home alive or without wounded. I cannot ruin a girl's life knowing the consequences.

But no matter how many times I convince myself, I cannot be hanging around my friends for the rest of my life, they got families to take care of. One day everyone will be busy with their own lives and I will be left alone. This emptiness will still be hurting me and I will spend my old days surrounded by silence and occasionally only the opening of my alcohol bottles will be heard. I will have no one around me to share my experience, my love and I will be breathing the last minutes of my life as wondering whether my fan is rotating clockwise or counterclockwise which I am probably doing now.

A cozy feeling spread through my body as my mother caressed my head with her palms humming an old song.
This felt normal, every confusion in the mind slowly vanished.

" Are you thinking about Marriage? " She spoke as I turned to lay on her lap.

" You never get tired of this. Aren't you?" I chuckled.

"Never, until I see you happy, maybe even after you found your happiness"

"And that is why?"

"I don't know, I think that's how mother's love works. I want you to be happy forever" I sensed my mother's smile.

" You shouldn't have let him join the military if you wanted him to be happily ever after," My sister remarked.

" You know, Kriya I don't like you from the day you were born that doesn't mean you should hate my job, you can hate me" My relationship with Kriya is unexplainable, we fight and deep down care for each other. I am a mess, She has OCD. We are on the opposite side of a coin inheriting all our parent's soft nature by her and the opposite by me.

" It will better my brother if every time when you visit make sure you leave your arrogant ass in your battlefield, including your dirty clothes" That's my sister for you. Did I say that she is soft? She is! trust me. I seem to be the only person to outrage her or to simply put I will be the only person on her hate list. Not even her ex.

" You both better behave like adults" My mother warned.

" Now go Kriya check whether your dad has returned?" The one thing that inspires me about Kriya is she is an Independent girl. To be Independent, I didn't mention that she earns her own money and stuff. She is independent in her thoughts. She knows when to stop when to judge, how to learn, and how to behave. Her thoughts control her actions and she makes sure she is the one who decides to control her thoughts. She isn't manipulative but passionate, which I guess is the most dangerous thing. Her passion for living persuades every one who has ever talk to her. She is unique to her own beliefs. I always wonder what made me to stay away from such a vivacious soul.

She is a complicated girl both emotionally and psychologically, I guess I play a part for her this complexity of the state of living. I cannot predict what she wants in her life, she doesn't show much interest or she is well in hiding. I don't prefer the word that she hides her pain or something. We both never did. Our parents taught us to be expressive and honest. It is not the case that she is betrayed or ignored. She had her part of life to heal from all her pain caused by her mistakes. It is just that the time period varies. She doesn't refuse to get help but she doesn't allow herself to believe in everyone or in handing her life to someone, neither me.

I am a proud brother indeed. and a confused one too.

" I know you are worried about your sister" My mother broke my trance.

"No, I am proud of her. Ma, Is that ever happen that you tried to persuade her to marriage too?" I questioned.

" I have tried once but I don't do any more"

" I remember that when all of her friends were getting married" I remember that day. She was pissed off when she was back from the wedding ceremony, both my parents were worried. Papa started to look for a groom. On that night she came to my room wearing that golden salwar kameez I bought her with all her makeup wiped, she ran and fell on my bed resting her face on my pillow pressed hard sniffling half of the night. Then she opened up about how she is overwhelmed with the pressures from the people around her so-called society to get her married. I am not good at advising or solving issues, I literally ran to her for my solutions. After her long confessions and arguments, she fell asleep for the first time in my room, she doesn't usually believe me, I am quite mischievous. I brought this matter to my parents since they know better to handle it. They did though.

" Why is that Ma? You don't compel her more than me. I know that you obviously love me more. But she too deserves a family right." I know she is standing outside watering plants. I said I am mischievous remember.

"Shut up and lose the grin. She loves the child who stays with her always." She shouted.

My mother simply laughed.

" First of all you both are wrong, I love you equally both, whether you stay or not. Secondly, we will be her family always. " My mother smiled as I woke up from her lap.

"So Why is that? Why do you chase me more to get married?" I wondered.

" She doesn't whine" My father marked his entry to support his daughter.

"It is simply because we find Kriya responsible and happy with her ownself now, she have the courage to live alone and once she voiced out her opinions to us and she wishes to pursue more from her life alone rather with a partner." My mother continued after noticing my father's partialism.

"You guys know that right? that you both don't sound like typical Indian Parent's " I chuckled.

" No, we beg to diifer. We do hate teenage love, we do pressure you when one of your cousin's get married. We do ask her not to stay late out , we do ask her to learn house chores ,we do hate sex before marraige and we do used to be detective when you were teengaers. Hence, we are normal" My mother joined my dad.

"Come on, You taught me to do house chores and you even asked me not to stay late out" I mentioned.

"That's equality my son" My father spoke.

" We did everything becuase we had a reason to protect you both" My mother spoke.

" Sister, Are you agreeing with me?" I shouted.

" Nope! As much as I hate to be on your side, I agree it with you. Guys, Indian parents can never say the word 'sex' without hesitation and with a normal voice" My sister joined me.

"That's true " My mother nodded.

"See they never accept their children's accusations" I pointed out.

" Tell me one thing, you want us to be like how your expectations or mind map you are assuming?" My father asked.

"Nope, I have actually we both have seen our respective friends struggle and problems due to misunderstanding with their parents we are happy that we are lucky to have you" Kriya replied.

"Mama , Papa I would be lying If I said I don't want to get married. I do. But I am afraid of I may get hurt or I will hurt the person who believed me " I finally confessed.

" That's how a solider's life works , Aarav " My father replied.

" You know what brother I think you need a dating app profile" Kriya grinned.

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That's end of the first chapter, hope you all like it. Do comment if you find any mistakes and if you like it just tap the star.