Spring Day

“Who’s Hueningkai?”

Dr. Kai’s smiling at me while he asks that and then he helped take a seat when he saw me doing it so. “I’m not sure… Who was it?” I muttered while frowning.

I can clearly remember how my voice speaks that name. “A friend?” he asks again.

I look at him and shake my head, “I don’t think so?” I replied.

My voice doesn’t sound friendly when I spoke that name. It sounded like I am addressing someone with full of respect and he holds the authority.

Who’s Hueningkai?

“Anyway, where’s Beomgyu hyung?” I asked instead.

“He’s probably working,” he answered.

“I’ll get going now. Thank you, Dr. Kai!”

When I get back to the building, I waited for his class to end. “Hyung!” I called him but his face went like he saw a ghost. “A-are you okay? Ah! Dr. Kai said I’m already—”

“I’m busy, I’m sorry.”

“Huh?”

I turn around when he just passed by me after cutting me off. I got confused so I quickly followed him and grab his hand. “Why are you suddenly acting like this?”

“I told you I’m busy,” he stated with his cold voice and he didn’t even look at me.

I suddenly felt annoyed. “What? Are you acting like… No, what do I did wrong?” I asked instead.

I heard him sigh and face me, he slowly let go of my grip. “Let’s talk later, okay? I still have classes and paperworks to do.”

That’s what he said and he just leave me at the hallway— dumbfounded. Why? What’s wrong with him? After he kissed me and then I passed out, he’s just gonna act like this?

It’s annoying!

The whole day, I didn’t even get a hold of hyung. He didn’t also eat with us and even Kazi went curious. My class already ended as well and the kids made my feelings lighter, at least.

“Aren’t we going to talk?” I asked the moment he enters the room. His hair is still wet from the shower. My voice also sounded serious—well, I am!

He didn’t reply and just went to his bed to dry his hair with the towel. I scoff in frustration so I walk closer in front of him. “Hyung,” I called him and he’s clearly avoiding me. “Choi Beomgyu hyung!” I yelled his name.

He meet my glares and my eyes soften when I saw how confused and anxious his eyes are. I bit my lowerlip. I think I know now why he’s acting like this.

“I’m sorry…” he apologized and his shoulders drop. “I must be crazy… I’m sorry Taehyun.”

“Why? Why crazy? What crazy thing you have done—”

“Last night—”

“Nothing,” I quickly cut him off and his eyes widen a bit. “Was that being crazy? I don’t think so? What’s wrong with it? Huh?”

“It’s wrong… because I didn’t saw you as you that night.”

Ah… that was kind of hurtful.

“And then?” I tried to be firm. “Are you acting like this because you might like me not because I’m the Kang Taehyun you once loved? Huh hyung?”

“Yes. You’re right,” he affirmed and he stood up to face me. “It’s driving me crazy that you exactly look like him and I might fall for it again. He’s dead… for five fucking years all I did was to mourn and resent myself but you suddenly appeared. What I’m supposed to do?”

“Then fall for me, what’s stopping you?” I argued.

He closes his eyes in frustrations and even brushes his hair through his fingers. “I can’t fall for you knowing the fact that you two are different persons! I can’t like you just because you have the same name and same appearance!” he raises his voice.

“Then I’m fine with it!” I yelled back. “Just like me as how you like Taehyun before. See me as how you saw him—”

“You two are different!”

“How can you be so sure!?” I raised my voice even louder than him that made him stop. I’m shaking. My whole system is shaking in anger right now and I don’t even know why. I also don’t care anymore if other will hear us shouting.

I breathe out and firmly bit my lowerlip before I speak again, “How can you be so sure that we’re different? You barely even know him. What if he likes butterflies too as much as I do and I just recently found it out? What if that Taehyun’s favourite color is also my favourite? Huh? I don’t even know what food I like. So tell me, do you know what that Taehyun’s favourie food too? No, it’s because you didn’t know him that much and I don’t even know who I really was too. That’s why… how can you be so sure that we’re different from each other?” I stated and I can feel my blood rushing through its vessels.

He pauses and I saw how his lips shake. There are also sudden tears that fall off his eyes. He lowered himself until his knees reach the floor, and then sobs sounded inside the room.

“I’m just afraid…” he cries. “T-the day I confessed my feelings for him was the day someone dear to me almost died,” he continued. “I’m just afraid that… that it will happen again. What if I love again and… and I can’t protect you?”

I don’t know what this feeling is but I just felt teardrops on my cheeks as well. Why am I crying? Why is my heart aching?

I bent my knees and hug Beomgyu hyung. I gently tap his back and just let him cry on my shoulder. I also felt his grip on my clothes. His sobs are getting louder so I hug him tight.

What really happened between you and Taehyun, hyung? How can he leave you like this? How can he die without you knowing? Why someone’s life was at stake when you loved him?

“Hyung… let go…” I whispered. “Let go of the things that are weighing you down. Let go of the things that’s stopping you to move. Time is supposed to run,” I added.

“H-how… How will I do that?” he sobs.

I slowly let go of him to meet his eyes and I smile. I brushes his tears as I cupped his face. “Me… I’m right here. I’m here for you and stop thinking that you’re just going to use me for your advantage, hyung. You know how I always wanted to help you since then,” I stated.

He shakes his head in disapproval. “I can’t do that you…”

“It’s fine,” I smile. “Everything will be fine, remember? Everything will fall on its proper places,” I added.

“Taehyun…”

“Beomgyu hyung… we shouldn’t stay at winter. We shouldn’t let the cold beat us,” I stated and move even closer to him. I gently pulled his head and I kiss his forehead. “Spring is here…”

“Spring…”

“You,” I smile. “Be warm,” I said and held his hand. “Be warm with me and enjoy the new season.”

He stares at our hands for minutes and I just let him. He’s probably thinking of what he should do. Please, hyung. Just take a leap of faith me.

Please, just trust me.

He shifted his eyes on me and then I felt once again his lips onto mine. Our lips were pressed for seconds and it moves and I let him. I let him kiss me as I respond to it.

My heart is beating so fast… and it’s so familiar.

The next morning, I wake up at someone’s arm. I smile the moment I remember what hyung and I talked about. I turn on the side and saw him sleeping peacefully.

“Thank you… for trusting me,” I whispered and brushes the few strands of his hair.

“Good morning,” I heard him greet with his morning deep voice. His eyes opens and it send me shock.

He looks so beautiful.

“G-good morning,” I greeted back and shyly giggle. I scooted closer to him and I felt him kissing the top of my head.

I like it… I like this feeling. It feels like I finally found what I lost for a long time.

“Tomorrow’s weekend, do you wanna go with me… and meet my family?” I asked hesitantly.

“Y-yeah? Your family?” he repeated in surprise.

“Yes? But not like I’m forcing you or what,” I clarified. “I’m just suggesting if you want,” I laugh awkwardly.

“Okay, we will,” he replied that made me smile. “Let’s stay like this for five minutes,” he said and hugs me tight. “I didn’t know that I’ll feel this again…” he whispered.

Me too… Though I didn’t know if I already felt this before but it seems like it.

Weekend came, before dinner time, Beomgyu hyung and I decided to talk a walk on the park. The cherry blossoms are finally at it. There are a lot of families having picnics as well. We started walking on the pathway that has full of cherry blossoms on the side.

“Beom…” I whispered.

“Hmm?”

“Day,” I added and chuckles. “Spring day,” I completed and glanced at him. “This is my first time again being at the spring season after five years,” I stated.

“Really?” he asked in surprised. “That’s good.”

“And why is that?” I frowned.

He walks in front of me and turn around to see me as he walks backwards. “You’re with me as you witnessed it after a long time,” he grins.

I laughs at it and hit him jokingly. “You like me that much?”

“Yeah, so much.”

“The old Taehyun or me?” I made him choose.

“I thought about it, the immature and kiddy Taehyun is kinda better?” he teases me and grins.

“Hey! I’m not a kid!” I yelled at him and he just found it funny.

Beomgyu hyung hold my hand as we walk further. “Thank you Taehyun,” he expressed and we paused from walking so we can look at each other. The wind blows and petals started falling on us as if we're in a movie. “For spending this season with me…”

“Hyung, the next time you’re going to see the real spring season, I hope I’m still beside you.”

That again… it’s clear and loud… it was my voice.

I smile at him. “Thank you too, hyung.”

My family finally meets Beomgyu hyung and of course, they approved it. My mom also adores him so much that made me feel at ease. I love how my family doesn’t look at someone’s status in life or maybe they just really treat me so well.

“Have you found him?” I asked Mr. Lim while we’re at the garden.

“Not yet, Young Kang,” he answered me and breathes out.

“Why not yet?” I asked again.

“I’m sorry… I tried everything but even his whole family isn’t in Korea anymore,” he answered.

I nod at him, “Should I just forget my past?” I asked and look at him.

“Yeah?”

“Should I start a new one without remembering everything?” I added and smiles as I thought of Beomgyu hyung. “It feels like living as this Taehyun will be better than dealing on what happened on the past… Right?”

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes. “I can’t decide things for you.”

Beomgyu hyung and I just finished talking over the phone when I decided to go out of the house to buy some snacks. The rain started pouring and I don’t have any umbrella with me. I was about to run when I felt the raindrops stops.

I look beside me and there I saw this man who’s as tall as me with umbrella. “W-who are you?” I asked him in confusion.

“I saw that you don’t have any umbrella that’s why,” he replied instead. “Where are you going? Bus stop?” he asks.

“No,” I shook my head. Why would I answer a stranger like him? Though it looks like we’re at the same age but still, we’ll never know.

“Then should we just let the rain passed by first?” he suggested and I saw him smile.

“W-who really are you?” I asked again politely.

“If you’re thinking I’m some kind of a kidnapper, please stop,” he laughs. “I’m just helping,” he added.

I nods and just decided to stay for a while as the rain started pouring even more. “Whoa, how I wish I didn’t went out…” I muttered.

“How I wish time will move faster,” I heard him as well that made me look at him. “Sorry,” he chuckles. “I can grant wishes, should I grant that one?”

I frown, “It’s too simple… If someone can really grant my wish, maybe I’ll wish for even bigger,” I stated and sigh.

“Try it and we’ll see,” he said.

“I wish… I can remember everything that happened before.”

“Should I grant that? But every wish has it’s exchange condition,” he informed.

“What will be the condition?” I asked in curiosity.

“You’ll know once your wish is already granted,” he answered still wearing his smile.

“What’s that?” I complain. “Who on Earth will wish without knowing the conditions—”

“That's it. After I grant your wish there is going to be an equal or opposite condition. I'm not the one who's choosing the conditions.”

“I'm going to grant your three wishes. This is the first one. Now, you only have two wishes left and you should wish inside 90 days. And those 90 days starts today.”

“You’re going to grant people’s wishes… that’s the condition of your own wish, Kang Taehyun.”

I snapped out of myself because of the strong wind that’s blowing. I look around and see nothing but the city lights of sky scrapers. Are we at the highest floor of the building? Then I saw that man who was with me earlier. He’s near the edge of the building.

My heart is beating so fast. How did I ended up in here. Who is this man!?

“Hey! It’s dangerous! Let’s get back!” I shouted and hesitantly move closer to him. “Hey! Why are we here!? Who are you?” I shouted again.

He slowly turn around and gestured me to walk closer to him and so I did cautiously until I am in front of him. “How can you forget it? We used to hear people’s wishes in here, you can’t still remember?”

I frown. “Huh!? What are you talking about?”

He let out soft chuckles and then he takes a few steps towards the very edge of the floor that made me anxious and nervous. I also readied my hand to grab him.

“You don’t need to worry… Everything’s going according to what has been planned.”

“Hey!” I shouted when he slowly let himself fall of the building.

I open my eyes and I can feel how I bathe on my sweats. I look around and I’m on my bed. The alarm suddenly sounds and I breathe properly. My heart is still beating fast.

Who was that guy? He was wearing this all white from longsleeves to pants and shoes.

I frustratedly close my eyes and think even harder. I’m starting to glue all the memories I have so far and I can already think of what are the possibilities.

I think sooner or later… I’ll found out who really this Kang Taehyun is.