(Liam's POV - Sat. 17 may 2014)

Mmh... I love this cozy sensation of comfortably lying on a cloud of cotton and as if I were in some kind of haze. This is kind of amazing, like I am floating between blankets of cumulus but without the risk of gravity pulling to crash to the ground, and yet something tells me that I shouldn't be feeling such serenity. In my slowly-waking mind, I am getting more and more aware that the last sensations I felt were not so pleasant. Not at all. Rather than a bed of fluffy cotton, a bed of nails would be a better comparison. As a matter of fact, as the mist and fog progressively dissipates around my brain, the enjoyable comfort I was feeling a few seconds or minutes ago evaporates and vanishes away. The cloud switches to a hard and sticky mattress; the dimness gives way to painful and difficult memories; and my aching body only enhances even worse memories.

The pain is far from unbearable and not as bad I remember it, but it is here, nagging almost every part of my body: my head, my limbs, my chest, my back and even my throat. Then there is that smell; that smell I have always hated; the reeking smell of hospitals and even if it means that I am safe and alive, I still hate it. Flashes of what happened flood in the darkness behind my closed eyes, making my muscles tense at the dread of an impending threat; the three men plotting to kill me; Devon Hawler and that Kenny guy attempting to rape me; my escape to flee and the impressive tumble in the staircase. I fell from almost the top and it was strikingly frightening to feel my body roll down the stairs without being able to stop it. I could so easily have hit a sharp edge and killed myself.

It happened very fast and yet I can still see it in slow motion. Once my body reached the bottom and pulled to a stop, I remember how the pain woke up from everywhere. There was so much that I couldn't tell if it came from my scratched hands and face, or from Devon's slaps and punches, or from my limbs hitting the steps and wall. All I know is that in my fright to be at their mercy, unable to move, I suddenly recognized the soothing voices of people that made me feel safe and when my eyes opened, I saw familiar faces surrounding me and it was all that mattered; one of which I knew would save me from this mess and take care of me. I vaguely remember Camden checking me and maybe supplying the first aid, and Joshua's worried face but then it all turned blurry and dark. I struggled not to pass out but I just couldn't take it anymore. All I wanted was to be in my man's safe arms and once I was there, knowing that nothing worse could happen to me, I simply embraced the darkness and its welcoming promises of a temporary relief.

Now there is this annoying beeping sound echoing in the room and I force my eyes to open. The room is still quite dark but I am met with expected white walls and ceiling which confirm my presence in a hospital. As my head slowly tilts to the right, I see an automatic blood pressure machine that rumbles and some kind of strapping begins to inflate, making me wince at the pain around my arm. Inhaling and exhaling softly, I wait a few seconds for the machine to do its job and sigh with relief when the arm cuff finally deflates. I wish I could unscratch it before it starts again, but I realize that my left hand is stuck between the mattress and something warm and when I turn my head to the other side, I see that it is resting beneath Joshua's head. Even if he is facing away from me, I can easily guess that he is sleeping. I hope that he didn't spend the night here, especially in such an uncomfortable position, or else, he will be stiff and might need Camden's skilled hands to put him back into shape.

As much as I would love to see his face and drown into the safety of his eyes, I think I should let him sleep. Moreover I don't know what I should expect when he wakes up. I really don't know how they were able to find me yesterday but I can only imagine how he must have felt when he realized that I had disappeared. Following that Kenny and spying on him and Dominic was the most stupid thing I ever did in my life. I know how Joshua always wants to know where I am and how he worries for nothing and everything. I don't intend to lie to him on what I did and why I did it, and he will probably get angry - if not furious - when he learns that I knowingly put myself in danger. Unfortunately, I cannot change the past and I am ready to face the consequences, but I guess I can wait a little more and I am willing to let him sleep for a little longer.

At the opposite side of the room and to my left, a door quietly opens, making me startle a little but Joshua continues to sleep as Tony walks in and shuts the door; a warm smile spreads on his face when he notices that I am awake, but his expression remains concerned and quite stern. I try to smile back but it must have come as a grimace when I feel how painful it gets to stretch my lips and lift them up, reminding me of the two slaps I got in the face. Tony drops some bags on a table and hurries around the bed to go and stand on my right side.

"Hey Liam... How are you feeling?" Tony whispers to me, resting a warm and callous hand on my right arm. The affectionate gesture and the worry on his face warm my heart.

"Like I've been run over by a truck...?" I reply with difficulty in a barely audible voice. My throat is sore and I am so thirsty but it seems like Tony read through me and he gently brings a glass of water to my lips; allowing me only a little amount to wet my lips and clear my throat.

"I'm not sure you're allowed to drink too much yet," he explains as he puts the glass back on the side table. "You really scared the shit out of us..." he scolds me, shaking his head disapprovingly and I feel the blush spread on my face. "Have you called a nurse?" he then asks, pointing at the alarm remote that is sitting next to my right hand. "Maybe you can get more analgesics..."

"I only woke up a minute ago and I didn't want to disturb Joshua..." I whisper, accentuating Tony's scowl.

"For a smart boy, you can be dumb sometimes..." he growls much louder. "Joshua!" he calls out, and as my head shifts to the other side, I see Joshua barely stirring in his sleep. He must have been awfully tired and probably stayed up most of the night to see me waking up. Just when I am about to tell Tony to let him sleep, he calls out a bit louder: "Joshua Pierce!" This time, Joshua slowly leans up with a grunt and rubs his face with one of his hands while the other remains on mine.

"Shut the fuck up, Tony!! You're going to wake him up!" Joshua whisper-yells, glaring at Tony who smirks at him. If I wasn't in such pain, I would probably burst out laughing, but the best I manage is a light chuckle that finally gains his attention. "Oh sweet Lord!!! You're finally awake..." Before I know it, he rises to his feet and his hands are all over me, softly patting my arms, chest, shoulders and finally my face, his lips lightly brushing every inch of my face. What strike me are the tears pooling in his eyes and although he keeps them at bay, my heart constricts at the pain in his expression. "Oh my God, I'm so glad to see you awake... I was so scared, Baby..." Joshua rambles on and on as he showers me with light kisses, bringing tears to my eyes and my words of apologies sound so weak next to his buoyant and happy relief.

"Joshua, you're going to suffocate him," Tony scolds him and Josh slightly pulls away to have a better look at me, his hands cupping my face.

"I'm sorry, Baby, I wanted to be awake when you'd get back to consciousness. How long have you been awake? What time is it? Shit! I must have dozed off..." he apologizes.

"It's only 6:30," Tony replies.

"Barely a few minutes ago..." I reply at the same time.

"I arrived a few minutes ago and you were wide awake..." Tony accuses, glaring at me.

"Why didn't you wake me up?" Joshua asks reproachfully.

"You looked fast asleep... I didn't want to both..." I mumble.

"Argh! You should have woken me up! How are feeling? Are you hurting?" Joshua asks, worry filling his eyes again.

"I'm okay..." I lie.

"Your face was saying the contrary a few minutes ago..." Tony argues again and this time, I glare at him. Before I can say anything else, he presses the button of the alarm and before I have time to protest, an old nurse walks in. Either her office is across from my room or she was passing by, but damn! That was quick!

"Good morning, gentlemen... Oh I see Mr. Reed is awake. How are you doing, sweetheart?" she asks, walking to Tony's side to check on the machines and the IV.

"Hmm... not too bad..." I lie, hoping that they will release me immediately. I just don't want to stay here. I am sure that I can rest at home.

"Don't lie, Liam!" Joshua growls.

"I'm going to add some more drugs anyway..." the nurse explains as she already works on the IV bags.

"Don't give me anything to sleep... please..." I beg her.

"That will come later on, if I see that you don't get enough rest..." she chuckles.

"How long will I stay here??" I exclaim, trying to lean up which I immediately regret when a dull pain reverberates in my chest.

"As long as the doctor sees fit. She will come and check on you in a couple of hours," the nurse explains. "I'll be back with your breakfast in a few minutes. Do you need the urine pot?" she then asks as she walks around the bed to the left side. Could she get me more embarrassed? Just her mentioning it has my bladder remind me of its existence and I guess that was easily visible on my face. "Can you please leave the room for a minute, Sirs?" she then asks Joshua and Tony.

"I guess I can stay and take care of that while you and Tony get out..." Joshua grumbles as he already grabs the plastic pot behind him, but it seems like the nurse sees things happening differently.

"Out!" she says, snatching the pot from his hands. Joshua glares at her and then looks pleadingly at me.

"I can take care of myself... Please go... I won't take long..." I whisper to him and with a sigh, he eventually walks out, followed by Tony.

"Do you need help?" the nurse offers.

"Hmm no, thanks; I should manage..." I reply without hesitation, yet blushing as I grab the pot within my bandaged hands - Thank God, my fingers are free!! As soon as she has her back to me, fumbling with some accessories nearby the door, I slip the pot underneath the sheet and relieve my bladder. "I'm done..." I call out to the nurse and she comes back to pick up the pot and goes to flush it in the attached bathroom.

"I'll be back shortly," she says a minute later and walks out, letting Joshua and Tony back in. I notice that Joshua is still wearing the black trousers and light-blue shirt he had yesterday morning and that his jaws are bearing a sexy stubble. I guess he didn't go home at all.

"How are you really feeling?" Joshua asks softly.

"I hurt about everywhere... but it's getting better... I don't know what she put in there, but it's kicking in," I sigh as the pain slowly dissipates, only remaining on the surface.

"You owe me some explanations..." Joshua says very seriously, holding my left hand while Tony stands at the bottom of my bed, looking very serious too. Dammit! The both of them look too serious...

"Can you tell me first... how bad it is?" I sheepishly ask, pointing at my arm.

"Two cracked ribs, several bruises over your chest, back, arms and legs, scratched hands and face, and a large bruise on your left cheek..." he recites, anger drifting on the surface of his voice. "You had a very light concussion too, but the X-ray revealed that it was going to be quickly resorbed on its own. The doctor said there was nothing too serious in the end, but it could have been worse, Baby... Now your turn to tell us!"

"How long will I stay here? Can I get out today?" I ask, ignoring his question and making him glare at me.

"The doctor will tell us later today. Maybe if I convince her that we can have a private nurse at home for as long as necessary, she will accept to let you out soon..." Joshua answers, finally bringing hope and real relief within me. "But that's only if you talk now!"

The nurse chooses that moment to come back in, holding a tray with some coffee and bread; not even butter or marmalade. She puts it on a trolley and brings it to me before she walks out again.

"Wait..." Tony says, fumbling into one of the bags he brought and pulling out some mugs, a Thermos jug full of coffee and some scones. "Liz prepared this, this morning..." he explains, serving some coffee for the three of us. "She also packed some fresh clothes and toiletries she said."

"She's really the best..." I whisper shyly.

"Yep, and she's mine..." Tony chuckles, wriggling his eyebrows at me and making me blush once again. I am so not used to this playful side of Tony!

"Joshua is not bad in the kitchen either..." I mumble, lightly shrugging my shoulders.

"Now is not the time to discuss about my sexual performances, Baby... so..." Joshua begins before I interrupt him.

"I wasn't talking about..." I exclaim but he cuts me again.

"Shhh! Stop! Don't try and change the subject again! Explain what happened. Now!" he orders, back to his serious self. I guess I can't push this back any longer...

"I don't know where I should start..."

"Start from the very, very beginning... because I have a feeling that you have much more to say than I expect..." he replies with a knowing look.

And this is how I get a questioning in due form for the next hour or so, recounting the whole story of what happened and how the chain of events got me into troubles. I swear that I really have hard time, not so much from my sore throat or from having to recall everything, but more from Joshua's and Tony's glares and scolding. I can tell that I'm screwed and in deep troubles, and not only with Josh. Tony's playful mood has completely evaporated, and his anger and disappointment in me soon show on his face.

My recounting of events is pretty disheveled as I jump from one thing to another without any logical link between each, but I begin with the trip in New York since this is where I first met Kenny and relate what happened in the staircase that day we visited the new Barkins building. I also tell them about Dominic and how he has been treating me since I joined the company - all the nasty looks, the insults. Even if I try to minimize their impact on me, arguing that they flew over my head most of the time, Joshua's blood seems to boil in his veins right then and he firmly reproaches me with not having told him any sooner. Homophobia is not something I can tolerate in my company and you should have known that, Liam! Fuck! How could you not report him? You fucking know the ethics and policies of the company!! he growls. At that moment, Tony has to use some of his powerful persuasion to calm down Joshua.

I then report the conversation I overheard in the parking lot on Thursday evening while I was waiting for them, earning a frightening glare from the both of them. Even when I argue that Joshua looked already upset with some business issues that evening and that I simply didn't want to add any further stress to him, it doesn't sooth his mood and he briefly explains that he had an audit going on within the Finance department and that this information would have been useful to him on the contrary. This is not for you to decide how much stress I can take, Liam! If you hear about stuff like that, you have to tell me! Or you can go to Tony or Ally and even Allan!

When I get to explain what happened on Friday morning, I use a bit of my charms to soften his anger. I first tell him how I had decided to surprise him with joining them for lunch and it works... for just a few minutes. Joshua's face melts at my revelation but it doesn't last for long. Continuing with my encounter with Dominic in the elevator, relating how I had met with Kenny just a few minutes before and how I decided to follow them when I saw the same guy barging out of the staircase didn't help my case. Tony keeps grumbling incoherent sentences about my naivety and my lack of judgement, pacing angrily across the room, while Josh just stands stiff and still, glaring at me and on the verge of imploding. And things don't get any better as I repeat what happened at the pub, then in the alley and at the abandoned warehouse, not leaving out a single detail of the events. Joshua's body has become so tense, his muscles straining beneath his crumpled shirt, and his face keeps alternating between a deep angry red and flushing to a sickly white when I mention their intention to kill me and get rid of me in a concrete slab.

I truly surprise myself letting all out. I thought I would have preferred to bury these memories at the back of my head but I suddenly feel the need to take everything off my chest. Tears run freely on my cheeks when I detail Devon's plans to enjoy some fun with me and how Kenny agreed to it. The souvenir of Devon's hand inside my pants and what they were about to do is painful, and I realize that I was really lucky that the phone call interrupted them, but above all, I keep reminding myself that things could have gotten much worse. I don't know if I would have been able to speak so freely about it if Devon and Kenny had managed to go all the way, but since I apparently let it slip while I was almost unconscious at the warehouse, I guess that Joshua would have insisted on hearing what happened anyway.

All I can say is that I feel like a huge weight is being lifted off my chest from voicing the incident through words. Even if I still feel dirty from their hands touching me, the tears that have been freely spilling out of my eyes since I came to the confining part feel like they are starting to wash me of this dirtiness. More importantly, the warm hands wrapped around my own hand make me feel safe and bring me the support I need to go through this. The man I love is here beside me and there is nothing that could matter more in this moment. Tony's presence only increases this impression of security.

By the time I am done relating all the events, I feel awfully exhausted though and that's when the doctor decides to finally show up. Tony excuses himself out to make some phone calls but Joshua stays by my side while the petite woman checks me up. As she rolls down the bedsheets, I try to hide a bit beneath that stupid hospital gown but I only earn another glare from Joshua and an admonition from the doctor who reaffirms that she needs to check on the bruises and scratches. She pulls down the top of my gown, revealing some bad marks on my abdomen and chest - right then I wish Joshua had left the room with Tony to avoid that painful expression on his face - and she gently palms my lower stomach and aching ribs.

Once she has verified my vitals and the remaining data from the night, Joshua informs her that he would like to get me out of here as soon as possible and that he would have a private nurse visiting me at least three or four times a day and watching over my healing. After a bit of argumentation, the doctor eventually accepts to release me tonight but only if I am let to sleep through the entire day and with the promise that I will come to the hospital for a full checkup in five days. Well, I could promise her anything she wants provided that I can leave today.

I am so tired from what happened and having to relive it this morning anyway that sleeping shouldn't be a difficult task. However, before I do that, I insist that Joshua tells me a bit more about what happened in the office and with the Finance Department. Unfortunately he doesn't have the full report on the exact situation and he can only repeat what he told me earlier about several persons being convicted of embezzlement, stealing and trafficking of materials and equipment, and manipulation of figures. It explains why Dominic was so nervous and irritated and I now understand better their talk about putting things on hold.

After that, a comfortable silence settles between us and my eyelids are getting heavier. Tony still hasn't come back and now that I think about it, he had a weird expression on his face before he left. It wasn't only anger or disappointment; there was determination too, but also some kind of uneasiness.

"You should be sleeping now, Baby," Joshua softly whispers to me, caressing my fingers and I simply nod in answer. Just before I give into slumber though, something that has been nagging my thoughts suddenly comes back to me.

"Hey... you haven't told me... How were you able to find me? By the way... I'm sorry, I lost my phone..." I mumble sleepily.

"Don't worry about your phone, Jeff found it in the alley..." Joshua replies.

"Oh that's good... so? How did you find me?" I insist, struggling to keep my eyelids half open. Joshua briefly casts his eyes down and a certain nervousness suddenly displays on his face but he quickly recovers his confidence.

"Your collar... your collar saved you, Baby..." Joshua whispers, holding my left hand within his.

"What do you mean...?" I ask, getting more and more confused.

"There's a little GPS chip welded to it... This is how we were able to locate you... I'm sorry I should have told you, but I didn't think I would have to use it one day and even less so soon after I collared you..." he explains.

"You've been tracking me??" I exclaim, feeling a bit more alert all of a sudden.

"No, I told you I wasn't intending to use it!" Joshua defends himself with a chuckle.

"But you still had it installed..." I accuse.

"And it saved you, so I don't give a flying fuck about the rest and we can talk about that later. Sleep now, if you want to be allowed out of hospital tonight..."

Yeah that might sound like a good idea indeed. I don't know how I should feel about the tracking device though. My thoughts are so confused and I am so exhausted after all this talking. And the one thing I want is to get out of here and go home. Home... home...? Joshua's home...? Hmm... that sounds weird.

"Josh..." I whisper before sleep takes me out and he hums in answer. "Love you... Please stay... don't leave me alone here..." My eyelids are way too heavy now and I can't see him but I can feel the smile on his lips as he brushes them on my fingers. I can also hear the emotion in his voice when he replies a few seconds later.

"I'm not going anywhere... and I love you too, Baby..."

With that in mind, I know that I can let myself sink into a deep sleep; a dreamless sleep I hope; my conscious has had enough reassurance to fight against the demons who might pollute my unconscious.

Published on 14 Dec 2016

Almost 2000 more words than in the initial draft... it was worth waiting for another day to publish the update.

12 more chapters to go!! Thanks for still being there and for your patience!

And since it's still the 13th for a large part of the world, I'd like to wish a happy birthday again to the sweet @JaneyJordan 🎈🎉🍸