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(A/N: Stop at 1:20.)

~Spaulding POV~

Stucky was just showing me a fuckin' porno magazine with the pictures of Lure Wilkinson, but it was signed.

Stucky: It ain't worth nothin', my name's all over it. I was fixing it to trade it to Jackie Cobb.

Spaulding: The guy that hangs out at Molly's Fruit Stand?

(A/N: I'm not allowed to write the r-word. I'm way too pure.)

Stucky: Yeah.

Spaulding: For the life of me I cannot understand why you hang out with that asshole.

Stucky: He's one horny asshole.

Spaulding: Well, ain't they all? All they wanna do is eat and fuck.

Stucky: If you knew him, you might understand his urges.

Spaulding: Worse than a rabid-ass baboon.

Stucky: Yeah. You know what his favorite thing is next to whacking his weasel?

Then he starts showing me something that I couldn't believe!

Stucky: He takes a sharpened pencil and sticks it in his eyeball and twists it.

Spaulding: What?

Stucky: He doesn't hurt himself though, he kinda twists it next to his eyeball.

Spaulding: He'd been putting that pencil someplace other than his eyeball.

Stucky: He don't do nothin' like that. Although, once he got caught, you know, with a "Planet of The Apes" doll stuck up his asshole.

I just laughed as he said that! That was fucking funny as shit!

Spaulding: Goddamn!

Stucky: They had to take him to the hospital. Kid had Dr. Zaius stuck halfway up his butt. Couldn't get it out.

As I walked back to the counter, Stucky had to ask.

Stucky: Did you fix the toilet yet?

Spaulding: Yes, I did and I don't want you stuffing any goddamn paper towels down there. I had to snake the shit out that thing.

I gave him something to use for wiping his ass and it was a claw sticking its bird up.

Spaulding: Here you go. You bust that crapper and I'm gonna bust your ass.

Stucky: I hear ya.

He took it and went as I was tending to some of the stuff here until I saw two ugly masked motherfuckers come in and held me at gunpoint!

Spaulding: Mary, fucking Moses, ya'll get the fuck outta here!

Masked 1: Hold it, clowney. Keep your paws up where I can see them!

This asshole wanted me to put my hands up, so I did!

Masked 2: Don't move. I'll blast a hole the size of a Kansas City watermelon through your ugly ass, Bozo face!

Spaulding: What the fuck is that supposed to mean?

Masked 1: Go grab the other asshole out of the shitter and drag his ass back here.

Masked 2: Right.

He was moving over and was messing up as he moved while his boyfriend kept his gun at me!

Spaulding: You miserable motherfu- I ought to jump over this counter and bash your fucking balls in!

Masked 1: All right, Tippy, hand over the cash box and I might leave your brains inside your skull!

Spaulding: I'll tell you what, Ski King. Why don't you just take your mama home some chicken and then I won't have to stuff my boot all up in your ass!

Masked 1: I don't like chicken and I hate clowns!

Then the other asshole held Stucky at gunpoint out of the bathroom as he had his prized possession in his hands.

Masked 1: Put that shit down. Put it down!

He shot his gun in the air before aiming at me again.

Masked 1: That is it! I'm gonna count to 10 and you're gonna hand over all the cash, or I'm gonna splatter your grease-paint mug across the state line. One!

Spaulding: Fuck yo mama!

Masked 1: Two!

Spaulding: Fuck yo sister!

Masked 2: What are we gonna do?

Stucky: Hey I know you, you work at the hardware store, right? Richard Wick, right?

Masked 2: Shut your trap!

Masked 1: Quiet down, both of you! Three!

Spaulding: Fuck yo grandma!

Stucky: I remember now, all the guys made fun of you. Called you Little Dick Wick.

Masked 2: Shut up!

Stucky: Little Dick Wick, played with his prick
Don't his smell just make you sick?

Then the asshole took his mask off to show his face! What a fucking idiot!

Masked 2: Stop singing, I hate that song!

Masked 1: Put your fucking mask back on!

Then the mask fell off his head as I laughed my ass off before this prick took his own mask off!

Masked 1: Fuck it!

Then my friend came in and beat him down as I took my revolver out and shot the second masked guy in the head, killing him as I walked over to where the other prick was.

I stepped on his chest, and I finished the count for him.

Spaulding: Most of all, fuck you!

I shot his face three times and his blood and brains got all over me!

Spaulding: Goddamn motherfucker got blood all over my best clown suit!

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(A/N: Sorry it was short, but I just had to redo the prologue before we get to the main start of the story.

Hope you guys enjoyed this first chapter and I'll see you in the next!)