DENOUEMENT

FOR MONTHS, Lennon had stayed cooped up in that spare room she had come to call her own. She'd stayed there, broken and distraught as she contemplated her life and what had become of it. And what her contemplation had birthed was this: never fall in love with girls like Lily Evans. 

There were moments in her short spell of loving that fiery ginger in which she willed herself to take out her own heart so she could stop the never-ending ache. Loving whirlwind girls like Lily Evans was a self-inflicted torture that no-one deserved. Maybe Lennon had even broken her own heart by living under the deluded ideology that somewhere, Lily still cared for her. Some nights, she still found herself running through the insane possibility that she would turn up at Lennon's door, same coal-fire-hair and spring-meadow-eyes, but when she woke up she found herself glad it was a dream.

There were moments in her short spell of loving that fiery ginger in which she willed herself to remove her own heart, hoping desperately to stop the never-ending ache. Loving whirlwind girls like Lily Evans was a self-inflicted torture that no-one deserved. Maybe Lennon had even broken her own heart by living under the deluded ideology that somewhere, somehow, Lily still cared for her. Some nights, she still found herself running through the insane possibility that she would turn up at Lennon's doorstep, same coal-fire hair and spring-meadow eyes, and tell her she loved her too. Then, when Lennon would wake up, she would find herself, miraculously, glad it was just a dream.

Perhaps in another universe, they may have worked out, Lily and Lennon. Maybe if she hadn't been so close-minded, maybe if she had been able to find it in her heart to love Lennon too. But then again, the utter devastation that had been Lily's rejection had led Lennon on to bigger and brighter horizons that she felt far more fortunate to have.

She was glad that she hadn't come across James or Lily in months. Her reunion with Peter had been severely awkward for everyone involved, but following an impressive amount of vodka shots and three drunken attempts at an apology, he was forgiven. He was even accepting of her newfound sexuality, joking that that was the only reason he hadn't managed to get up her skirt.

Sirius and Remus had offered her a full-time room in their apartment, as long as she didn't mind the occasional sound of them shagging through the thin walls. She told them she'd invest in ear plugs. In truth, she didn't really mind at all. She was thankful for them, for their generosity. In fact, if it weren't for her boys, she would likely still be stuck pining after her best friend in her unhappy home, not strong enough to accept who she really was.

Every story has an ending, and this is ours.

While she wasn't quite where she had wanted to be, there was a certain beauty in where she had ended up. She would never live to see Lily Evans in a white wedding dress, and she would never understand how it felt to lose her breath against her soft, supple lips.

Yet still, Lennon would live to love, marry and move on with life, and perhaps that was what was most important. The burden of existing had snapped at her heels, and yet she had lived through it all.

One year of Lennon's life had left her beaten and battered, and yet she had come out of the other side better for it. One year that she would never forget: 1962.

END

AUTHOR'S NOTE:
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hi all. i honestly can't believe this book is finally finished! i've never finished a book before, so to finally have done so after years of writing has left me kind of shook and emotional, and i'm especially glad i did so with lennon and all the other characters in this book who i have come to love so dearly.

i want to thank you all so much for reading, and i hope you have enjoyed reading this as much as i have enjoyed writing it! if you are interested in searching for more of my writing, please visit my page for some more marauders/golden trio fics you might enjoy too! thank you sm <3

"perhaps one day i'll crawl back home, beaten and defeated. but not as long as i can make stories out of my heartbreak, beauty out of sorrow."
[sylvia plath]