Antonio's POV:
"Okay Piccolo so..."

As Xadrian and I walked into the kitchen the sound of the door banging caught my attention. I felt Xadrian shiver as he started to shuffle behind me slowly. So much for making lunch, I sighed and span round taking Xadrian into my arms.

The door can wait.

"Piccolo listen to me your safe here, in this house. It will just my soldiers remember I have a meeting. Now would you like to come with me or do you wish to wait in the library until I'm finished?"

I hooked my fingers under his chin so he was looking at me instead of the floor. I know it's a subconscious response for him to automatically look at the floor when he's scared or uncomfortable about things but I really wish he wouldn't. I need him to feel comfortable being in this house, our home and not panic at the sound of the door knocking. I want him to be comfortable around people other then myself as much as I like spending my time with him I want him to explore the world, to meet people his age and have friends he can rely on and even though it pains me to think it I want him to have someone he can turn to when he feels he can't turn to me.

"I..I will wait in the l..library for you."

Two steps forward and one step backward. Okay, I can live with taking a step backwards just this once but I want us to move forwards never backwards.

"Okay I'll come and get you when I'm done and we'll make pizza."

He gave me a small smile as I kissed his forehead before we parted ways. I ran my hand through my hair before I swiftly made my way to the door that knocking is really starting to drive me crazy.

Without a word a swung the door open and turned my back making my way upstairs to my office. I knew it was them, their familiar scents hit me like a tone of bricks as it surrounded me. The past I'd been suppressing for the last two years was now walking behind me but now is not the time to reopen old wounds, to look back at the burnt bridges now was the time to rebuild them.

"So here we are oh mighty Alpha, what do you want?"

I dug my claws into my chair rolling my shoulder back as I looked at the seven people in front of me. It was taking everything in me to not growl and put them in their place. I will not be disrespected.

"Watch you mouth Cugina we may be blood but I will not hesitate to put you in your place!"

Well this is a great fucking start! They've been here what two minutes and Liv's already pissed me off. Fuck! I scanned each one of their faces and I was met with cold glares of angry, frustration, curiosity and dare I say disgust.

"Let's put all our cards on the table shall we. You don't like me I get it. I'm the monster that stole your friend, robbed him of his life for the last two years but I am just as much a part of him as he is a part of me. What pains him pains me, what angers him angers me so I pushed. I pushed until I couldn't push you away anymore because for him it was too painful to have you all round; like a constant reminder of what could have been. Now I don't care if you hate me, if you would rather stab me in the back and run away by all means the door there because now it's not the time for lies or denials. I'm a proud man, I'm not ashamed admit it but right now I'll hang my pride if it means that you'll...you'll help me."

The words still felt foreign as they danced on the tip of my tongue but the words were out there now for all to hear.

"Help. You want our help after two fucking years?!"

I ignored my cousin and turned my gaze to the others. Scanning their faces one by one until my eyes met a pair of golden amber eyes. Kayson; Mio Amore.

"Answer me!"

A fist slamming down hard onto my desk snapped me out of my trance. I pushed out of my seat on instinct my hand snapping around Liv's wrist holding it in a vice like grip. I growled baring my teeth at her until she showed her neck in submission. I released my hold on her wrist and sat back down, I knew this wasn't going to be easy but fuck.

"I didn't ask you here to fight, I've made many mistakes and I'm trying to do something about that. I'm not asking as your friend, as Alexandro Griffin. I'm asking as me; Antonio Du Luca. War is coming and I don't care what happens to me in the end but I know I wouldn't want anyone else by my side then all of you. My Beta, My Gammas, My Deltas, My Head Warrior and My Enforcer. Too long I have ignore your position in this pack, in this gang. I concluded that having you close to me was a sign of weakness when you were always our great strength. I need my...my family back because I don't think I can do this alone. I have a mate I must protect, a pack, a gang, a family and we were always stronger together. So yes I'm asking for your help."

My eyes met Kayson's once more. He's different, he's changed since the last time I saw him but so have I. I want a chance to be his mate, a chance to show him how fucking sorry I am and how much I..I love him.

"You are my Alpha. Now and Always."

Carlos. I turned around and your always there, no matter what I say or do your still there why? Why is it always you my friend?

"I don't deserve your loyalty."

Any of your loyalty, hell I don't even know why I'm asking you for help and yet I do. Deep down I know why it's not because of the war not really, it's not just about keeping Xadrian safe it's..me. I can't run from this feeling anymore. Wolves are natural pack animals and this yearning inside of me just won't go away.

"Your right you don't but...but you do. Carlos is right your our Alpha, your Antonio and your Alexandro. Two sides of the same coin right. "

Two side of the same coin...

"You know Antonio it's far easier to say or promise something what's harder is meaning it."

Why do those words sound so familiar? Where have I heard them before; why can't I remember who said those words?

"Who told you that?"

I racked my brain desperately trying to remember who said those words but I came up blank and from the look on Eva's face I should know this.

"Luna Collette Renée Argent Griffin."

Mom. Why is it that I barely remember you? I should remember you, Alexandro remembers you so why can't I?!

"Who cares about who said it, it doesn't change the fact you left us! How could you leave us like that?!"

A growl rippled through my throat, it's matters to me who said it. It should matter that my mother said those words, no matter what has gone on between us, my mother still deserves respect.

"You know where the door is. You want to leave then leave."

I didn't leave. I liked my solitude, my peace but that has got me nowhere. Drayden was right I need to get myself together, I have to stop pushing no matter how much the beast inside me demands respect, control, the blood. I need to keep in control and to do that..I need my pack to ground me as they once did.

"And there it is the voice of God; pushing us away once again. See Carlos I told you, what was the point in coming here. I have half a right to challenge you Alpha!"

So why don't you cousin?

A familiar scent caught my attention making me look away from Liv and to the door. A sense of calmness washed over me as I caught a glimpse of Xadrian through a crack in the door.

"When we where seven you asked me once why I wanted you as my Beta, why I chose each and every one of you stood in front of me and I told you that we may not all be family by blood but we are by heart. That no matter what when all is said and done I would never turn my back on you, any of you and even through I was Alpha you were all equal to me. So challenge me, kick my ass if it will make you feel better throw your glares at me all you want but I will never do anything to hurt you again because I am sorry. I am sorry that I pushed you away and I am sorry that you feel I stole the life of Alexandro but I was always here and you knew it and not once did you care so why can't you see me now? Why can't you accept me for who I am?"

I looked back at to door to see Xadrian was gone. Did he hear all the yelling? Was he scared? Did..did he come to check on me?

"I hate you so much but I forgive you. You are my Alpha. Now and Always. And you are my cousin but if you ever do this again I'll kick your ass and I won't ever come back."

I felt a smile creep up onto my face as they all nodded one by one bowing there heads to me acknowledging me as their Alpha.

"Thank you. I trust you all remember the way to your rooms."

They all smiled or nodded before they filed out of the room. I let out a sigh of relief as the door slammed shut behind them. I..I did it. I actually did it. Now I just have one more thing to fix before I go and check on Xadrian. I need to see him, Mi Amore; my Kayson.

I took a deep breath before I stood from my desk and headed straight for Kayson's room. Come on just knock, just knock on the stupid door. Come on.

"He's gone Ant."

I span round retracting my hand from Kayson's door. What the fuck does he mean Kayson is gone! He was here less then two minutes ago he can't have just gone!

"No."

I ran passed him as fast as I could, running out the door like I should have done two years ago. I let him go once I can't let him go again I just can't. I don't care if that makes me selfish I need him just as much as I need Xadrian. I need my mates.

"Kase?! Don't."