34 BULLETS

I woke with the sun slivering between the trees. The fire was still crackling beside me with no Thann to be seen. But my eye caught on three things placed purposefully beside the blanket. A large blue lily, a handful of raspberries, and a folded piece of cloth.

Lifting the cloth between my fingers, it unfolded.

It was a basic straight edge shirt without sleeves in the same soft leather that Thann's pants were made of. Looking down to my bra, my shirt had been ruined with those cockroaches. Had Thann made this for me? It looked like it would fit perfectly.

I scanned the area and there was no trace of him so he must have been on his morning abandonment.

I put the shirt down and ate one of the sweet berries while I twisted the spectacular lily between my fingers. It was velvet soft and smelt like heaven. It was making it very hard to decide if I was still mad at Thann or not.

Maybe I should have just went with Cane. I wanted females now, not necessarily my flashlight.

Maybe I'll just go it on my own now.

Setting the flower down, I twisted over my shoulder to see my back wound. It hadn't been hurting since Thann's medicine, but was seeming grimy after sleeping on it. Though I knew not to get off the blanket again if I didn't want to be woken up covered in roaches.

The stream still trickled by and I figured it could use a good wash out before Thann got back and we... or I... needed to start walking again.

Stuffing the last three berries in my mouth I dropped my pants, keeping my underwear on. I was ready for a slight bath. My long hair whipped around and while it had been catching every tree the day before it wasn't dirty enough to need a wash. So I pulled out the ponytail holder and made a twisted messy bun on the top of my head securing it with the elastic. I was sure not to win any beauty contests looking like that, but what did I need to worry about looking pretty for. My eyes rolled internally. Matza ball guy already wanted to get laid. He didn't care about my ugly topknot.

I pressed myself down in the water and clenched at the morning chill. I was more of a lava hot bath person, but the water barely went over my thighs so it's not like I'd get a soak anyway. Leaning down I scooped up a handful of cool water and poured it over my back. I knew I was washing away my stitches, but Thann's basket was still near the fire and he had a bunch of those leaves still.

It was good to give it a thorough wash. All I needed was to get it infected and need antibiotics on top of everything else.

After a few minutes of rinsing, I stood and found a sunny patch on a nearby rock and went to sit and dry off.

I listened to the morning birds and closed my eyes trying to picture myself back on my farm. The warmth of the sun radiating down. The sounds of swaying corn in the fields. The scent of baking strawberry pie. The taste of fresh pea pods eaten right off the vine.

I missed it so much.

And not for the first time, I wondered what everyone was doing back on Earth without me. I missed my family. I missed my animals.

I missed my home.

For a few minutes I just absorbed it in.

But this was my life now. That was some other time.

I let out a sorrowful breath and stood, a new resolve to be better for them filling me. I'd stop moping and just do.

I came off the rock and walked to my pants and boots, placing them over my mostly dried self. Picking up the shirt, I gave a sad smile. Thann was still trying to help me at least.

Or maybe he just didn't like his brother seeing so much of my skin.

I snickered and put the shirt on.

Looking down and examining myself, it wasn't too bad. Straight down from the sleeves, but wide enough for my chest and plenty of movement for my arms. The bottom just danced around the top of my pants, so anytime I was going to need to reach for something, it would become a belly shirt.

But it was so much better than hiking around the forest in a broken bra top.

Thann's two note exclamation announced his arrival and I turned to him.

He paused a step when he noticed the shirt.

I looked down and held the bottom out. "Uh, thanks. It's nice to have a shirt."

He stepped to me and I kept looking at the shirt, unsure how to act after I gave him the silent treatment before bed.

The pads of his fingers pressed on my chin and made me look up at him.

He was softly smiling with warm eyes.

I gave a cautious smile back.

Sorry. Thann like El happy.

I shrugged and turned my head from him.

Suddenly he yelled. "Ilanga legolide!" He palmed at my sad bun until he was pulling pieces out bit by bit again.

"Hey! Ouch!" I complained and tried to slap his hands away and run from his grasp.

One arm locked around my stomach while the other ripped the band out, letting my hair free. "Bheka ilanga. Bheka ilanga!"

He then smoothed down my hair with a sigh and stepped back, letting me go.

I stared at him confused.

He watched back stoic.

It was the second time he ripped my bun out.

The moments ticked on as the dots started to connect.

He then blinked and started walking away to collect his basket.

"My hair?" I asked his back.

This whole mess had started the first time I let my hair down.

He had pushed me away right after!

He had mini freak outs every time I tried to put it up.

He was loving on me only until he saw my hair.

"That's it. Isn't it? My hair. Maza has something to do with my hair. You hate my hair."

He started rummaging through the contents of his basket.

A new sense of purpose overwhelmed me. I then rummaged into my own pouch and brought out my pocketknife. "Well, we can fix that." I hooked a handful of the long locks into my hand and placed the knife against it.

In that moment, I was only thinking that I didn't want to be tied to some crazy guy that just wanted to mate. Not that my hair was nearly a prized possession. I had been growing it so long, it was a piece of me like an arm or leg.

I wasn't thinking of how I'd feel once the hair was finally chopped.

And I pressed the blade to the strands.

It was not the swift cut I was hoping for and I really had to saw the knife to cut any pieces at all.

With my grunts of work, he finally looked over and brow pushed together.

When a dime sized lock fell to the ground his eyes went wide with shock.

"I don't want you..." I tossed another piece to the ground and gripped to cut more, "to hate my hair."

My knife was seized from my hand and a panicked Thann was yelling to the heavens. "Ilanga legolide. Lungisa! Lungisa! Sun! Sun!"

He grabbed the strand from the ground and was pressing it around my head like he'd connect it again.

"Stop it!" I swatted his rattling hands. "It won't go back on. It's done. Hair is dead."

Thann stepped back from me, the strand flowing over his hand and he stared at it with horror.

I grabbed it and threw it in the fire. It burned to a crisp in seconds. I glared up at Thann. "See? I don't have to have long hair. Hair kill!"

He grabbed my arms, face horrified and enraged. "Ima! Umlingani weNkosi uMaza unelanga elisagolide!"

I growled and broke from his grasp. I didn't have my knife anymore, but I could still get rid of my hair. Bending down, I held my handful to the last heat of the fire and the tips started to singe.

I was in Thann's arms again before I'd lost even two inches.

I sneered up at him. "No hair," I held out the burnt ends, "No Maza."

He released me and stepped back, now a worry of contemplation on his face.

We both regarded the other until Thann broke the silence. His voice was soft and sincere. "He-air kill. No he-air. No Maza?"

His tone quieted mine and I agreed. "No Maza."

"No Maza. No Hair?" He scrutinized.

"No Maza."

He stepped forward; a hand lifted to stroke my cheek. "Yes ...Thann?" His voice was perfectly deep, and extremely throaty.

I swallowed at his touch and nodded. My body fully racing a one-eighty from anger to aware.

Another step brought him clear into my personal space, only an inch from brushing flush against me and my heart started racing. "El mate Thann?"

Did I want to?

With him? Yes.

"Y..yes."

He then pulled my body tight against him, the heat radiating through my every pore and he caressed the back of my head, brushing his lips against my cheek. "El kiss Thann?"

"Yes."

And all time stopped when his lips met mine.

His kiss was soft and sweet, like some first kiss on the big screen. Just the perfect amount of pressure and warmth that undid my insides like a zipper.

Soon, I was aching for him and deepened the kiss myself letting my fingers roam over the shape of his torso.

Each touch was burning like a fire and our kiss became more needy. Presses were harder, movements faster, but every feel magical.

"Mate," he whispered over my lips.

My eyes didn't open when I echoed, "mate," against his. Yes. I was ready.

"I llove you."

My eyes opened to a hooded smile, and I reached my hands to hold his smooth jaw.

He reached one hand away and kissed over the palm.

My hips flooded with heat and anticipation.

Taking a breath, I gathered my courage for the next part, but I already said yes to mating. I wanted him. Slowly I took the new shirt over my head and unhooked my bra.

I licked over my lips, moistening them and watched his eyes roam over my body. When his eyes met back to me, I curled my hands around his wrists and gazed up to him, my heart pounding in my chest. "Come."

He let me guide him back to the fur, my makeshift bed by the fire, and I pressed him down to it, a massive grin taking over both our faces.

The sun was nearing lunchtime when my eyes opened after a short, lovely nap.

I was laying on my back, Thann on his side, using his arm to hold up his head. He was rubbing a warm hand over my stomach.

"Hi," I said with a dreamy, satisfied smile.

He leaned over and kissed me.

"Is it time to get walking again? Or can we just stay in bed all day?" I smirked.

He just kissed me again and leaned back to rest on his arm.

His hand was still sliding over my stomach, and I looked down at it. I placed my hand over his to stop his movement. "What are you doing?"

His hand moved again, not bothered I was trying to stop him. "Baby," he said affectionately.

I giggled at his pet name.

Oh wait.

He meant he thought I was now pregnant.

"Oh," I laughed and moved his hand off. "Mathe gave you the birds and the bees talk, huh? Well, not this time." I shook my head, "you don't have to worry. No. No baby."

"No baby?" He looked confused.

I leaned up to my shoulder and poked around at the rod in my arm, letting him see the edges. "This is Earth medicine. Earth medicine equals no baby. So you can take me all you want."

"Medicine?"

"Uh yeah." I decided how to explain it and sat up. I tapped at my back that seems I was too distracted to remember hurt for the last hour or so. I swiped over some leftover white dried powder. "Indawo medicine, no hurt." I tugged on the birth control implant. "Earth medicine, no baby."

He gasped in horror.

His eyes widened like a dragon was baring down on us and he scooted back off the blanket muscles stiff. "Earth medicine. No baby? No baby!"

Thann's breathing came in ragged puffs and he stood, his hands massaging over his hair like ridding a dreadful headache.

I sat up to my knees after him. "Yeah. That's right. What's wrong?"

He just started shouting. "Earth medicine? Ngabe Earth iyazihlinzeka yini izidakamizwa zokubulala izingane? Abantu bakho banengekile! No, no no."

He grabbed a fallen piece of wood and threw it into a neighboring tree, splintering the stump in anger.

"Thann!" I cried in disbelief. "What is wrong with you? Settle down!"

"No baby! No baby! No baby! Earth medicine!" He continued the frenzy.

"Dude, calm down." I started to get nervous and began putting my clothes back on. "No baby is a good thing. I don't want to take care of a baby right now. That's a lot of work."

He punched a few trees as his fight slowly drained from him and he walked into the brush, plopping down on a fallen log and dropped his head to his hands, whimpering.

Thann now looked like someone who was just told they had lost their parent. Heavy sounds like sobs and whines came from him.

I tied my boots and inched over to him, sitting beside him. Rubbing my hand calmly over his back, I made him look at me. "You okay?"

He looked out over the trees, no tears from his eyes, but sadness drowning his face. "No baby."

"Yeah," I nodded. "Like I said, no baby, is good."

Thann's eyes slitted in anger and he spat his signs at me. No baby, not good. He yanked my arm around and felt around for the implant himself. Kill baby. No good. "Earth medicine no good. Kill baby."

"Oh," I tried softly, "well, this doesn't really kill a baby, just makes it so I can't have one to begin with."

"Izingane ziyigugu kanti Earth iyabulala nje. Okunengekayo."

He dropped his face in his hands again, but back to sadness. "El. Hear." He spoke into his hiding spot. "Indawo, no baby. Indawo no females. Females hurt-sick. Kill." Sighing, he looked back to me, desperation warring him. "Earth yes females. Earth yes males. Earth yes baby." He reached and squeezed around my hand. "Indawo males. Males males males. No Indawo baby, no Indawo female."

"No Indawo females?" My face read confusion.

He nodded, swallowing hard. "Mathe, Molly. Andla Sara Indawo baby one." He then stared me straight in the face, eyes strong and purposeful to truly get his point across. "One."

One.

First babies.

Molly and Mathe's twins were the first babies on Thann's planet?

My heart stopped and face paled when his words were finally understood. I would have fallen off the log in fear had he not quickly grabbed around my arms, centering me.

"Thann!" I cried in dread. "What do you mean Molly's twins are one? There are no children on your planet? There are no women? No females? Not one?!"

He shook his head and let my arms go. "No females," he agreed then stood off the tree and stared into space leaving me to live his nightmare.

Females hurt-sick. Women got sick?

Kill.

They died.

All of them? Surely not all?

No wonder he was hoping for us to make a baby!

No children on a whole planet?

That was so mad, I couldn't even try to contemplate it.

Two children. That's all his planet had. Holy freak. How are they supposed to populate with no females?

They'll all die out.

Thann. Thann will die.

Cane. Cane will too.

Mathe. Mathe will...

No. Wait.

Mathe's line will go on.

But that's because of Molly. Molly the Earth woman.

Molly had a baby.

That's why.

That's why all the Earth women were here.

That's why,

I

Was here.

My insides plummeted with the realization. That's why the women were transported to this planet. Whatever higher power being was out there, did not want the Indawo people to die off.

As Earth women it was now our mission to,

Mate.

Have children.

And I had mated. But I couldn't have children. My eyes traveled to my inner arm. Not with the implant in. The medication would work for another three years. Could Thann's planet last that long?

I surely wanted children, but did I really want them already?

Maybe?

No, not really. That's why the implant in the first place. Yes, I wanted kids, but in my early twenties? I was so young.

My mom would be happy. She loved being a grandma.

Mom.

I wouldn't be able to tell her she had another grandbaby. I'd never get back there.

Huh, what if I could?

Was that my ticket back to Earth? Maybe once children were given, we could go home. That entity that brought us women to Thann's planet, might allow us to get back home after we completed our mission.

But wouldn't that mean that Molly's mission was complete? Cane never said anything about her disappearing after the twins were born.

No. Men obviously couldn't feed the babies, of course they'd need us longer.

But how much longer?

Maybe we were specifically chosen to help. Jia was a pediatric surgeon. Surely the men here would need help with medicines for babies. Molly was a teacher, maybe even linguistics. She was the translator. The children would need to learn. Maybe Lissette and Mataoka had similar value for a planet with no children.

But what about me? I was a youtube influencer. Dumb. Obviously that wouldn't be needed on a planet with no electricity.

But no.

Going deeper, I was prepared in so many emergency situations. I knew how to handle myself in the forest, get water, hunt. The women would need a buffer and someone to look to for survival until the babies came.

Was that my role?

Well. That, or I knew all about animal husbandry.

I gave a snort of a laugh.

I had a farm. I knew how important it was to have the species thrive.

And Thann's species needed to thrive.

Would I do it?

I was considering it.

Why was I considering it?

A year for a baby. Maybe another year to care for it.

Then back home.

I mean, I'd already slept with Thann anyway. Getting that far was half the battle.

My head started nodding and my mind started to set.

I'd do it.

I would give Thann his baby. I'd give this planet life.

I'd baby myself out and then earn my ticket back to Earth.

But first, the stupid rod needed to come out.

I didn't even think about it and just stood. More conviction than had ever sailed through me moved me forward. Crouching in front of Thann's pack, I dug through the riches for my stolen pocketknife, but his dagger was hilt up to the side.

It had fileted a dragon. It had to be so much sharper than my silly pocketknife.

I took the dagger to Thann and held it out. "We need to cut out the medicine." Uh, "Kill medicine. Use it."

He took the dagger in trepidation.

I grabbed a random stick beside him and stuck it between my teeth like I'd seen so many old west shows do for holding in a person's pain. Then I bent and showed him my inner arm, guiding the knife point at the base of the rod. I spoke around the stick. "Cut it out. I'm ready." I closed my eyes tight and bit down on the stick waiting for the pain.

But as the minute ticked on, the stab never came.

I opened hesitantly. "Thann?"

He was shaking his head disbelieving, the dagger held loosely in his lap. "Ungabi ngowesifazane ohlanyayo. Angikunqumi ingalo."

"Come on. We need to have a baby. Then I can go home."

He sighed and guided me to sit beside him. "No. No Thann hurt El. Bad."

"Well, it's just a little hurt. Then Indawo medicine." I tapped my back.

He voice was incredulous. "Imithi ngeke isize ukunqunywa kwengalo."

I didn't know what he said, so I just grabbed the knife from him. "Forget it. I can do it."

Biting down on the stick hard again, I pressed the tip against the rod and made my battle cry.

"Cha!" An instant later Thann was back a handful of paces, breathing rapidly, and the dagger in his hand. "No! No hurt El!"

I stood after him, pointing at the rod. "With this thing in, we can't have a baby. I need to cut it out and I can go home!" I sped forward to grab the dagger from him.

My attempt was laughable considering he was now clear behind me in some unseen movement.

I twisted to where his growl came from. "No! El no hurt."

"No hurt means No baby," I threatened.

"No hurt, no baby?" He stepped back shocked.

"Yes. So give me the dagger."

His face hardened and he looked away from me. He waited a beat before answering hopelessly. "No baby."

"No baby? Yes baby. Your world has no females remember? That's what I'm here for."

He turned and started trudging back to our camp.

He was replacing everything in his basket when I ran after. "Come on Thann. It's just a little hurt."

Shaking his head, he shouldered the bag and then kicked dirt over the remaining coals of the fire. "No Thann's baby."

"No Thann's baby. What's that supposed to mean?" I stood back puzzled.

"Wheelbarrow," was his only reply.

And then he was walking.

With a sigh, I followed.

I was never going to get off this stupid rock.