Sarah woke us up rather late this morning, and the only reason why we were still asleep at 10 a.m. was that we were up so late last night talking about nothing. It was actually kind of... nice.

"Steven, James? Wake up darlings," she whispered softly as she nudged us awake.

"Mooooooooom whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?" Steve groaned, pulling a pillow over his head and turning over, landing himself nearly on top of me (not that I minded much).

"Steven, wake up. I'm off to work now, and there are only nine days left until Christmas so you boys had better go out and get a tree for the house."

"What? Mom, you know I, uh, can't really do that..." Steve's voice lowered. The truth was, I knew he felt bad about his inability to do things. He knew he was sickly and often caught colds and he didn't want to have to deal with almost dying again.

"Steven Grant Rogers you will go out and get a tree or so help me, God... James will help you, won't you, sweetie?"

"Of course, Mrs. Rogers. I would love to," I replied sincerely as I nudged Steve to turn over.

"Buck!" He whisper-yelled at me, but I just smiled to myself.

"Thank you, James. Will you be here for dinner tonight?" Sarah asked me.

"Oh, I don't want to impose," I said.

"Don't be ridiculous! You're always welcome here for dinner. You're so wonderful to Steven, always helping him out and such. So, please, stay for dinner. If not tonight... tomorrow. I insist."

"Well, if you're sure... I can probably come tomorrow night if that's alright...?"

"Of course... But I must be on my way, I'm late for work," she said as she kissed Steve on the head and ran out of the room. Steve wiped her kiss off his forehead.

"Steve!" I whisper-yelled at him.

"What?" He asked, annoyed.

"Don't wipe her kiss off your face... Jeez, you know how much it annoys me when you do that... what I would give for a kiss from my mom..."

"Alright alright, sorry... I take it back."

"Good. Now, let's get that tree."

• • •

In our fluffy coats, giant boots, warm hats and gloves, Steve and I were off into the woods to find a good evergreen tree for the living room. I carried the ax and Steve held the rope and toboggan sled for only 10 minutes until we found one that would suffice.

"Not too tall or short, nor fat or skinny... I think this one'll do, Steve, right?" I asked.

"Yea it looks to be just right," he added, agreeing.

I took the ax and started hacking away at the base until it slowly fell and shook as it hit the ground. Steve tied the rope around it and we plopped it onto the sled and lugged it out of the woods and back home. 

• • •

Once it was all set up in the living room, all that as left to do was decorate it. Steve reached into a bin of ornaments and placed them each on the tree one by one, individually and precisely. I watched, not only as he extended up to reach the higher parts of the tree, but also as he bent over to pick something up.

He faced away from me and couldn't see me staring, but sometimes I just wish he would catch me. Call me out on what I was doing and maybe then, just maybe, I could make him understand.

"Need any help?" I asked quietly, placing my hand in his shoulder from behind (and resisting the urge to push myself against his backside).

"Yea, just grab some ornaments..." He pointed down at the bin.

"Okay," I replied as I did what he said. In and out of this bin we went and hung the ornaments on the tree. He was so delicate with them, too, like each of them was as fragile as he was and could break any second. I smiled as I saw him place a golden ball on the tree ever-so-gently.

I reached in for another ornament, the shiny red one with the green bow on it to be exact. I suppose Steve was going in for the same one, as my hand collided with his when we bent over to get it. I looked up and his face was just inches from mine. Did he feel that spark too? But then he smiled, so I assumed not. I smiled back just to go along with it. 

Fuck, he's under my skin and there ain't a goddamn thing I can do about it.

And so we went on like this for the next hour or so. Nothing more than smiles and laughs and hanging ornaments... even though I really hoped that it would be more.

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James_BuchananBarnes