Firestar: What's up ya derps it's Firestar and welcome back to 101 ways to kill Bluestar! Today will be death by-

*Firestar's phone rings*

Firestar: Yes? Oh! Really? Oh, OK! Yes, we can do that

Leafpool: *comes out of bedroom with Crowfeather* What is it?

Firestar: Feathertail's coming over to kill Bluestar with her dusty feather tail

Crowfeather: FEATHERTAIL?! ansjeieksbwkfldnnxjxkekwo

Leafpool; *coughs*

Crowfeather: Er- She was a great friend.... *under his breath* in bed

Leafpool: WHAT?

Crowfeather: I said she was a great friend even if she's dead

Leafpool: I'M DEAD

Crowfeather: Well in Headbutt's imagination I'm dead too

*Feathertail arrives in a limo pulled by Running Horse*

Feathertail: I GOT THE HORSES IN THE BACK; HORSE TACK IS ATTACHED. HAT IS MATTE BLACK, GOT THE BOOTS THATS BLACK TO MATCH

Headbutts: random reference there ^^

Running Horse: WHEN I SAID THAT MY SPEED MATCHED MY NAME, I DIDN'T MEAN THIS!

Feathertail: I don't care

Running Horse: *sighs* horses don't even pull limos, you're supposed to drive them

Feathertail: *sees Crowfeather* Hi Crowfeather honey! Long time no see! Ready to smash?

Leafpool: What?

Feathertail: He's my BOYFRIEND, darling, only an idiot hasn't heard of the Crowtail ship

Leafpool: CROWFEATHER'S THE FATHER OF MY KITS YOU INSOLENT BRAT

Feathertail: WHA-CROWFEATHER IS THE FATHER OF 1928 OF MY KITS

Leafpool: WHA-

Feathertail and Leafpool: *to Crowfeather* ARE YOU CHEATING ON ME?

Nightcloud: And me?

Feathertail: Shut up, Crowfeather never truly loved you

Nightcloud: *dies*

Leafpool: One less cat in my way. Nobody besides Breezepelt liked her anyways

Feathertail: Whatever. I have a job to do. Firestar promised me 10372719 pieces of catmint if I kill Bluestar

Leafpool: What? Da-ad... can I have some catmint

Firestar: No

Leafpool: *dies

Feathertail: YYEEEEEEEESSSS FINALLY

Firestar: GET IN WITH IT!

Feathertail: Fine. First, I want  Sharptooth to come and pretend to attack Mosskit. Then, once Bluestar is defending Mosskit, I'll take that opportunity to kill her with my tail

Leafpool: *is reincarnated* Then we can kill Crowfeather

Feathertail: Agreed

Sharptooth: Roar.. *looms over Mosskit*

Leafpool: Dear God...

Sharptooth:Roar.. roar.... roar... YEEEEEEEEEEET!

Mosskit: AHHHHHHHHH!

Bluestar: MY MOSSKIT BABY IS IN DANGER! *shreds Sharptooth*

Feathertail: Oh... uh oh..... *chops of tail and throws it at Bluestar*

Bluestar: Ooh, is this prey? *eats Feathertail's tail*ACK*cough**cough**cough**cough**cough**cough*

Feathertail: Yes, Yes, yes....

Bluestar: *almost dies* HAH! Now you've lost your tail and I STILL haven't died!

Feathertail: *grows another tail*

Bluestar:  WHA- *dies*

Finleap: I want another tail!

Feathertail: You're a loser. No

Finleap: *dies*

Leafpool: Now.... *turns to Crowfeather*

*Leafpool and Feathertail shred Crowfeather*

Nightcloud: NUUUUUUUUUU

Leafpool: *looks at Feathertail*

Feathertail: *looks at Leafpool*

One moment later......

Nightcloud: *dies*

Feathertail: Oh yeah! *tail grows back*

Firestar: *sigh*

Can you guess how Nightcloud died? Credits to sugarfluf for the idea