"Because I'm obsessed, I'm addicted and I will gladly cross every single line if it means making this girl mine. If it means forcing her to be mine."

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I can't sleep these days.

It's this horror that always lingers around me. I check my windows and door every hour to assure myself that they won't magically open.

At night, I don't even switch the lights off just in case someone barges in.

Even after all this fear, there's that chip in my mind that contradicts it. That makes me feel like I'm insane.

It's so messed up, even my holy mother can't bless me anymore. During the day time, all I do is think about that incident even when I force myself not to and at nights, all alone in my room, when I barely manage to get mere hours of sleep, I dream about him.

Dark Erotica dreams.

The man that was in that ghost face mask is now replaced. I see Jungkook's face doing that to me. It feels so raw in dream that I wake up panting, gasping for air all covered in blood and a big patch of my wetness in my panties.

Though I've never had sex, I feel sexually frustrated and it drives me nuts because I didn't want it. At all!

Somehow, somewhere back in my mind I want to see him in his ghost face mask again. It's been a week since the party. I haven't seen him anywhere yet- not in the college or outside. But I always have this feeling that I'm being watched.

I always feel like someone is tailing me, lingering in the shadows and waiting for the right moment to pounce on me. I try to be cautious when I'm out. I know that he won't hurt me in bad way, I don't know I just get this feeling that he's playing on my fears.

I made Da Eun stay with me for a whole week because I didn't want to be alone at home but it feels wrong to keep her here forever. She'll stay there with me gladly but it will just lead to everyone worry about me.

I still feel guilty for what I did to Da Eun. I know she isn't downright crazy for Jungkook. She just likes making jokes or like to exaggerate things. What she has for Jungkook is infatuation because I'm pretty sure when she'll know what kind of guy he becomes after getting out of those clothes of his, she'll not like him.

I think Jungkook doesn't like sweet or just hard sex, he probably fucks. Rough and kinky. He likes manhandling and as far as I know Da Eun, she's not someone who'll like being manhandled. But still we know nothing when she, herself, has never tried sex.

Anyways, the thing rounds of to me feeling guilty about it, even though I know Da Eun isn't that serious, but still even if it wasn't about Da Eun, I still don't want Jungkook to be in my life.

Today I told Da Eun to move out because I was feeling better than before. She's a really tolerable person but I just don't like living with someone for a long time. I enjoy my company more than anyone else. Don't get me wrong, I love her but I'll always prefer to live alone.

Besides, she had started being suspicious about me. She knows that something happened at the party, considering how my behavior has changed since. She has been persuading me into telling her everything but I can't tell her. I myself don't want to recall that thing over and over again.

My parents, somehow, got to know about Da Eun living with me too. They've been ringing me up constantly if my brain is feeling good or not, if I need to see a therapist or not.

They know I've been suicidal since I've started my teens. I didn't completely lothe myself but I hated how different I felt from everyone. I hated how I could never become part of any conversation because no one wanted to talk with a "nerdy girl" who's always consumed in books.

I used to feel detached, like I don't belong anywhere, like there isn't someone who actually wants me. I made a few friends in school, but they had other friends who were better than me.

I liked meeting with new people, making friends and talking with them, but in the age where girls were all over boys and finding their ways to somehow get into their arms, I never found my place there.

Eventually I got drifted away. I formed a voice in my head who talked with me, listened to me, made me feel less alone.

But at times, this voice gets so loud and makes me want to do some dangerous things, like slicing my wrist open.

I never wanted validation in my life, I just wanted to be a friend to someone and not feel out of the circle.

When I met Da Eun and Jae in high school, I finally felt at peace. Though Da Eun tends to have new crush every second month, despite knowing that I have no interest in it, she stills rants it all in front of me caring so less about me not being interested. However, I liked it, that my non responsive nature didn't let her drift away from me.

Jae, being the most anti romantic person here, is always chill. She talks about other things, otherwise she's just quite with her black cat energy. She's like my advisor most of the times.

Initially, I wanted her to stay with me for the week because she's not a chatter box like Da Eun, and also is lot more mature, so she doesn't insist much on me telling her what actually happened with me.

Da Eun, being the bestest friend ever, got to know about me feeling scared at home because she lives with Jae in an shared apartment. Without thinking much, she packed her bag quickly and ran to my place in less than an hour.

Right now, I'm in my class which is almost done. Da Eun messaged me a few minutes back that she bought some cupcakes and wants me to come to the garden of the uni after I'm done.

Holding my hand bag which doesn't carry much than a few things in it, I walk out of the class after giving a 'thank you' to the professor with a wide grin.

I'm pursuing my diploma in fashion designing along with my bachelor's. I love being creative too. I usually overthink about many things, fashion is one of them. I like a few brands and they inspire me a lot, it's my dream to have a brand of my own too.

I've made quite a few dresses for myself or my friends, and people say that I'm really good at this.

To be honest, my professor is so nice. She helps me with everything. Despite being in her forties, she looks too young and always dresses like old Chanel models. I adore her a lot. Sometimes I-

As I turn down the hallway, I feel someone grabbing my wrist tightly before I was dragged into some room I don't even know.

My eyes grow out of the sockets as my back was slammed with the door, making me let out a yelp before I open my mouth to scream.

A hand cups my mouth and I inhale strong smell of mint and leather. I'm too familiar to this scent that it makes my knees buckle at the realization on who actually is standing in front of me.

Sweat forms on my skin as the temperature around me rises. My heart pounds in my chest like someone is beating drums inside me and I shiver when goosebumps flare on the back of my neck.

It's so hot but still my body shivers when the face become clear in front of me under the dimly lit room.

"Hello, my peach," his raspy voice coarse through the air to grace my eardrums.

My breathing turns erratic as I just take his face in. His eyes are shining as he looks at me, even though he's standing few inches away from me I can feel his breathe on the skin of my face. His lips look soft and tipped up in a smirk.

He let go of my mouth. I gulp before I lick my lips. I open my mouth to say something but I couldn't. Oh my holy mother, why does he has this effect on me?

"Did you miss me?" he asks as he keeps both his hands by the sides of my head on the wall behind me as he leans in.

I press my head by the wall as I answer, "No."

It comes out in a breathy hoarse voice as I feel a sweat trickle down the valley between my breasts.

"Hm? Tell me you weren't thinking about me all day, making sure to keep your doors and windows locked so that I don't barge in. Also, do tell me you didn't dream of me at night touching you at the places no one ever has and doing-"

"S-Stop," I tell him, as I feel my cheeks reddening and ironically I also feel a warm feeling on the base of my stomach.

"That's not missing, that's being scared," I put out the fact.

The bastard's smirk grow bigger as he says, "So you're scared of me? And still you haven't reported me about breaking into your house at night."

I squint my eyes at him. First of all, What does he expect? He gives me open warnings on barging in my house and actually has done that once. He even sounds like some creep stalker and follows me everywhere. How could I not be scared of him?

Secondly, he's right. I didn't turn in a report on him because I didn't want to worry my parents about this and also because I don't have enough proofs about it. Seems like I'll have to insert cameras in my house now.

But most of all, I don't want to he alone with him again because my body is a traitor. I don't want to get carried away again. It's probably better if we just part ways and not meet again.

"Let me go, Jungkook. Don't be so obsessed over one blowjob," I hiss under my voice, as I hear people walking from outside of the room.

"The blowjob that got you dripping wet when I didn't even touch you there?"

"No, the blowjob that shouldn't have happened because it was... Well, just a mistake because I was drunk," I feel fire bubbling inside my veins at how this man has messed up my system in just two weeks.

Two weeks ago, I was perfectly fine! Living my life, away from drama and definitely so clear about being away from boys like him.

" So you didn't enjoy it, hm?" he asks me as his one hand creeps near my neck.

My body turns fuming hot as my brain curses at it for being so betraying. The pad of his thumb rubs over the protruding vein that's thumping at a pace I've never felt before. I flinch but I'm too glued on my place to move.

He grabs my throat, his gaze focusing on his hand there as he squeeze me there slightly. I gasp as my hands fly to grab his hand. He doesn't squeeze me further, but there's a warning that lingers there that makes my vision black and wetness pool in between my legs.

Looks like someone likes being man handled.

No no no, this isn't me. How come I like this? This is so not ok. No one should like being choked. What's happening to me?

I can't speak anything, I'm too messed up right now. Jungkook inches even closer to me so that I feel his breathe so clear on my skin. The minty taste invades my nostrils and my stomach churns at the proximity. Why is he so close?

My one hand goes to his chest to push him away but I again get betrayed by my body as I clutch his black shirt in my fist feeling his robust chest on my palm.

"I'm here to make one thing clear, Hana," he speaks and I gulp.

"If I see you with any other man from now on, I'll make sure he dies before I fuck you in the pool of his blood, you get that?" he warns me, though his voice sounds so calm. But the things he said here doesn't give a calm feeling.

This is, messed up, even more than my brain and oh so wrong too.

" But why? " I ask him, in an almost whisper.

" Because it's me who'll get you. Because it's you who has made me go nuts like this, even before that fucking party. It was just the first time I got you under my claws and it'll continue to be like this. Also because now that I've gotten a little taste of you, I want you all for myself with those pretty lips wrapped around my cock and that cunt of yours take it in the way I want. "

I take in a shaky breathe as I continue to look at him. My fingers tremble as I clench his t shirt even more tightly, almost turning my knuckles white. Why is he behind me? I'm so sure I'm not even his type.

" Why me? I'm not even your type. "

" You mean to say you know my type?" his face lit up with amusement.

"You follow all those girls on Instagram who has toned bodies and bigger breasts and nicer hair, preferably blonde, and-"

He chuckles at me, making me stop. What is so funny here?! I'm nearly dying!

"I didn't know you were stalking me on Instagram, baby," he laughs.

"I'm not your baby," I huff out before I frown and continue, "Also I wasn't stalking. I was just... Just..."

"Just what? Seeing if you're 'my type', baby?" he jokes.

I clench my jaw as I feel anger inside me.

"Look at you glaring at me like a pretty little kitten. I like it that you're obsessed with me too, my peach," he squeezes my throat again and I almost choke.

"Let me go. I'll never be with you," I sigh.

"You think?" he puts his leg between my thighs, opening my legs.

Crimson blood rushes back to my cheeks as he highers his knee a little, up to my clothed vagina. I'm wearing a skirt so the heat from his thigh, which is under his light blue jeans, is easily reachable to my aching part.

"Jungko- oh!" I try to push him away but just then he rubs his jean clad knee on my clothed clit. I'm so wet, I can feel myself leaking.

I feel so hot as I sense a trail of sweat flowing down my forehead and then I feel embarrassment. How can I be wet for him?

That night, I blamed it all on alcohol. But today, I'm sober. I can feel the sane wetness between my legs. This is just crazy for me and on top of that so wrong too.

He has held me in my place. His hand around my throat squeezes me from time to time and his leg between mine, has just kept me attached to this one place.

I feel light headed as my eyebrows furrow. I'm not looking into his eyes and giving him the satisfaction that he wanted. Instead I focus on my hand on his chest, that's fisting his t shirt.

"So what were you saying?" he whispers in my ear, making a shiver run down my spine.

"Please let me g- mmh..," I curl my lips shut as he jerks his knee again there.

I find myself putting pressure on his knee too, to feel more friction. What am I doing? Didn't I want to run away from here? Away from him? Why am I finding my release with him then.

This is so so wrong.

"Say it again," he murmurs near my ear but before I could open my mouth, I feel soft lips behind ear.

I moan and clutch his shoulder with my free hand. I feel butterflies in my stomach and I see stars in my vision when he licks the same spot.

I feel like fainting as I whine at the rush of new emotions. I've never felt this before and it feels so good that it fills the hollow pit in my stomach, making me let out some voice I've never heard from my mouth and feel some emotions I never knew existed for me.

"You said you don't want me," he kisses that spot again and runs his knee there again.

"Does that mean you're not dripping wet for me if I reach inside those panties and touch your folds with my fingers?"

I involuntarily rub myself on his knee, bucking my hips forward. My eyes close and I throw my head backwards by the wall.

Completely lost in the haze of finding my release, I completely forget who I'm doing this with. I've always come on my fingers. Never have I expected myself to find myself rubbing on some other man's knee, especially when i want to stay miles away from his circle.

"Tell me, baby," he asks me and puts more pressure upwards.

I can't speak. I'm unable to form any words again. This is not me, he needs to stay away from me. I need to push him away, I need to run away from him and most importantly, I need to push him out of my brain too.

Then do it.

I whimper before I try to push him away from me.

"Let me go," I breathe out, finally.

I open my eyes and stare at him, with pleading eyes.

"Please," I say, which comes out as a moan.

He inches in closer to my mouth and I close my eyes shut again. His lips touches mine. No he doesn't kiss me, it was just a feathery touch, which follows with another rub on my clit, making me feel my wetness coarsing out even more.

"You're mine, Hana and it's a matter of time before I get you under my body. Stay away from any other man, and remember...," he captures my bottom lip between his, pulls it out before letting it go as he continues, "I'm always watching you."

He rubs my clit faster and I moan shamelessly. It isn't too fast that I'll cum but it's fast enough to give me a lingering feeling of it, teasing me to the edge and never making me jump over it.

I want him to stop but I also want to not. I don't want to give him the satisfaction of making me come either.

I breathe heavily before I open my mouth to tell him to stay away from me or leave me or just let me go. I don't want to want this.

Just in time, I hear a knock on the door making me gasp out. My eyes snap open as I cover my mouth.

No no no no.

I don't want to be caught doing dirty stuff in a classroom with the baddest boy of the university.

The realization dawned upon me as I stare at him. Oh God, why am I taking so many bad decisions lately?

My hands start shivering. I know my life was boring but this much thrill will give me an anxiety attack. Why am I thrown into his world?

"Relax," he whispers to me before a voice comes from outside.

"Jungkook, we need to be in the ring. It's time," I hear a very familiar voice again. Is it Michael?

"Wait a min, Mi," Jungkook shouts back.

How did Michael know he was here? Did he know I'm here? Does he know what he was doing to me here?

"I need to go, we'll continue later, my peach. Remember what I said," he tells me before he drops his knee from between my leg. And then let go of my neck too, finally letting me breathe openly, not like he was blocking my oxygen though.

I look down at it to see a wet patch on his knee. What the... Is this my arousal?

Embarrassment rushes through me as my face reddens. He'll walk through the campus with my arousal on his jeans?

I wanna dig up a hole and die.

But before that, I need to leave. Right now!

I clutch my handbag which somehow landed on the floor before I unlock the door. I see Michael standing there, but don't look at his face, before I sprint down the hallway with uncomfortable wetness between my legs and my body completely on fire.

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It took me longer than expected coz I had to rewrite the chapter. Initially I made him eat her out but then I thought it'd be too much so I deleted it all and wrote this! Hope it was good!

Like and comment!

~Aster🌸