eight ⇨ group chat

DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILY!
[ 5 participants ]

HARP;
Merry Christmas, losers!
😘😘😘

IVONA;
I miss you!
It's been a week, my darling.

EVANS;
Are you two coming down for New Years?

A A RON;
It'd mean a lot to Harper.

HARP;
@a a ron 🖕🏻🖕🏻
I only miss Ivona.

SEBBY;
That's rude.
I was gonna say that I missed you too, but never mind. You done ruined that.

IVONA;
He's completely bluffing.
What are we gonna do when Avengers 4 is done filming?
I'll miss you all.

EVANS;
B*tch, you're the kinda people I'd call at 2 am if I needed help hiding a body.
You're my people.

HARP;
Is that a Grey's reference?
You totally watch Grey's Anatomy.

IVONA;
He totally does.

A A RON;
God, we can't do anything as a couple without getting scrutinized.

HARP;
Give me a f*cking break.
Screw it, I'm moving to New York to live with Ivona.

SEBBY;
But don't you have your own apartment in L.A?

EVANS;
Yes, but I'm over there all the time.

IVONA;
I live with my brother tho???

A A RON;
He's not objecting.

SEBBY;
Because Harper's my friend?
What a concept? A male and a female can be friends.

SEBBY;
But I love her way too much to consider her my friend.
[ erased! ]

IVONA;
🙄🙄🙄

HARP;
Me and Seb actually happen to have a lot of fun without you losers and living with him would be a blast. Unlike you, Christopher & Aaron.

A A RON;
Rude, you motherf*cker.

HARP;
I hope your favorite character dies in IW.

IVONA;
D*mn. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.

EVANS;
Wtf.
You know who dies.

HARP;
Not really.
I know of one character who dies.
That's it.
Besides, I ain't spoiling IW for that idiot.
Marvel's got me on a contract too, dummy. I'm not tryna go to court and call my lawyer.

IVONA;
Marvel doesn't play around.

SEBBY;
They actually took Mark's phone away after the Ragnorok premiere.
Duck taped Holland's mouth shut for promo videos.

HARP;
That man is a walking spoiler.
They both are.

SEBBY;
Holland's an annoying dweeb child.

IVONA;
Be nice, Sebastian. I'll tell mami.

SEBBY;
You tell mother and then you can live with her.

HARP;
You're always welcome to live with me, Ona.

A A RON;
Or Chris.
You're his favorite Stan anyway.

EVANS;
Thanks for the exposure. 🖕🏻🖕🏻
But he's not wrong.

SEBBY;
Rude.

HARP;
You love us.

EVANS;
That is true.

SEBBY;
Unfortunately...
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