( * for an angstier experience listen to hear you me by jimmy eat world after the instagram post - YOU HAVE TO )

HEAR YOU ME
CHAPTER FIFTY THREE
❝THERE'S NO ONE IN TOWN I KNOW, YOU GAVE US SOME PLACE TO GO, I NEVER SAID THANK YOU FOR THAT, I THOUGHT I MIGHT GET ONE MORE CHANCE. WHAT WOULD YOU THINK OF ME NOW, SO LUCKY, SO STRONG, SO PROUD, I NEVER SAID THANK YOU FOR THAT, NOW I'LL NEVER HAVE A CHANCE.❞

♔ ♔ ♔

twitter
direct messages

fdimensions1996:
rey, i need help
delivered 4:03 PM

softtofu:
woW theo needs MY help?
delivered 4:04 PM

softtofu:
is the world still revolving or has time officially stopped and we're all about to die
delivered 4:04 PM

fdimensions1996:
you're a hoot
delivered 4:05 PM

fdimensions1996:
i'm pretty sure my best friend is avoiding me
delivered 4:05 PM

softtofu:
yikes
delivered 4:05 PM

softtofu:
what did you do?
delivered 4:05 PM

fdimensions1996:
things are changing between us
delivered 4:06 PM

fdimensions1996:
like relationship wise and now it's all weird
delivered 4:06 PM

softtofu:
like is it bad?
delivered 4:06 PM

softtofu:
on a scale of 1-10 how bad?
delivered 4:06 PM

fdimensions1996:
1
delivered 4:07 PM

fdimensions1996:
times 11
delivered 4:07 PM

fdimensions1996:
i'm so sad and lonely now
delivered 4:07 PM

fdimensions1996:
like i made spaghetti and i kind of want to walk up to her and be like hey want some spaghetti
delivered 4:07 PM

softtofu:
damn
delivered 4:07 PM

softtofu:
i mean i love spaghetti so you can always give it to me
delivered 4:07 PM

fdimensions1996:
i would but i'm in germany still
delivered 4:08 PM

fdimensions1996:
okay enough about my sad life,,,what's going on with you?
delivered 4:08 PM

softtofu:
at work right now 😕
delivered 4:08 PM

fdimensions1996:
oh what do you do?
delivered 4:08 PM

fdimensions1996:
wait how old are you???
delivered 4:08 PM

softtofu:
i'm twenty something
delivered 4:10 PM

softtofu:
i'm an intern for now but idk what i want to do yet
delivered 4:10 PM

fdimensions1996:
you don't want to be an artist?
delivered 4:10 PM

softtofu:
nah i'm currently majoring in architecture and environmental science
delivered 4:11 PM

softtofu:
falling dimensions is kind of an on the whim type of thing
delivered 4:11 PM

fdimensions1996:
so i'm assuming a sequel is out of the question?
delivered 4:11 PM

softtofu:
maybe, idk yet
delivered 4:12 PM

fdimensions1996:
yikes lmao that means after the book is done i can't rant to you about how your updates are slowly making me suffer
delivered 4:12 PM

softtofu is typing . . .

fdimensions1996:
reyna you're going to make me cry jfc
delivered 4:12 PM

softtofu:
i'm in germany too
delivered 4:13 PM

softtofu:
let's meet up
delivered 4:13 PM

♔ ♔ ♔

rosegoldcha: last day in germany and all i could think about is my dog 😔
tagged: itsyaboitofu
760 likes
103 comments

username1: ROSÉ WITH BANGS IS MY AESTHETIC

username2: lol you're so ugly wtf

chacha.noah: lmao can't relate tofu is a terrible nephew

username3: lmao more proof that rosé actually doesn't work like wow congrats on picking the best for your interns marvel!

username4: username3 who pissed in your cereal

misskelseyeast: wow bitch okay i miss you too you stupid hoe

username5: who's the better pet itsyaboitofu or kimchithekat

chrisevans: username5 tofu

robertdowneyjr: username5 kimchi

username6: IS IT CIVIL WAR 2.0

renner4real: You made me take a picture of you for this?

username7: okay but y'all for someone who isn't that tech savvy renner4real did it a bomb ass job at taking this photo

officialelizabetholsen: renner4real lmao she didn't even give you picture creds

username8: hi yes where can i get a clear skin like the cha's?

username9: nut nut nut

wendigos: MY MOTHER IS CLEARING MY SKIN WITH THIS BEAUTIFUL PHOTO

sethoconnor: australia isn't the same without the twins 😢 chacha.noah rosegoldcha

chacha.noah: sethoconnor fake news we all know you love rosie more than me

username10: why do i feel like if chacha.noah ever got a girlfriend he'd accuse her of using him to get to his sister like 24/7

tomholland2013 liked your photo

username11: goddammit tom

♔ ♔ ♔
( breaks fourth wall - gO PLAY THAT SONG LIKE RIGHT NOW AND HAVE IT ON REPEAT )

Something Tom always wondered is why do our hearts beat when we're excited? What's the proper explanation as to why that happens? There has to be a good reason, a good scientific explanation as to why. Because there has to be a reason why his heart raced against his chest at the mere thought of her.

It was hard to sneak out of the hotel, especially since they had just wrapped up shooting in Germany. Soon they were to travel to finish up and Tom had one last scene before he was to head back to London. But with the help of Noah he was able to get past the staff still lingering in the lobby room.

"You have two hours and that's that, okay?" Noah whispered quietly as they managed to catch a cab. He held the door opened and stared at Tom in the backseat and over his shoulder to make sure they weren't caught. "When you get back have the cab driver drive you to the parking lot and then call me."

"Thanks mate," Tom replied as he fist bumped the older Cha twin. Noah gave him a nod in response before he closed the door and began to rush back to the lobby. Tom made sure his friend made it back into the hotel before he gave the address to the driver.

Nerves rattled his stomach, maybe it was this fantasized butterflies that everyone talks about. He wasn't sure, but he knew it was strong and controlled him in this very moment. Tom felt the palm of his hands grow clammy and his leg bouncing up and down as the thought of meeting Reyna paralyzed him.

Endless questions ran through his mind. What did she look like? Why was she in Germany? What's her real name? What part of London is she from? Does he know her personally? Did they ever meet?

This isn't a random encounter with a stranger from the internet. This is Reyna, softtofu, someone he admires. Maybe he's crazy for falling in love with a girl over the internet, a girl he hasn't even seen. Most people would tell him that he's crazy for breaking up with a high end fashion model for a girl he hasn't even seen.

This changed his perspective on this whole love thing. You can't choose who you fall in love with. There are times where we fall for someone who shouldn't even be in the equation. We can't choose who gets to stay in our lives or who's a part of it. Because that's how life is supposed to work, we're supposed to be confused and ride along on this journey that we never wanted to take part of. Because you're supposed to go through life completely blinded as to what happens next.

After all, where's all the excitement if you know what's going to happen next?

But Reyna isn't some girl, no, that's not even a good way to describe her.

How do you describe her?

You can't describe a constellation, a collection of stars and just point out a specific star. It's not possible. It's like asking to describe a color by a blind person. You can't just say 'oh this is a mixture of yellow and a burst of orange,' but you can describe what that color feels like. Like orange is the color of her smiles, her goofy texts, and her stupid dog puns.

Because Reyna wasn't just a girl, she was so much more and to put such a label on her is atrocious. She's this person full of life and experience, and she's willing to share that experience and advice for the people in the world. She's this girl who somehow had the answers to all the problems in his life, it was almost as if she was right there next to him.

Tom genuinely thinks that he won't be caught off guard by however she looks. Because no matter what the girl standing in front of him will always be Reyna. She will always be this girl who helped him get through difficult times, even if they weren't talking just reading her book made his day better.

"You can drop me off right here," Tom said to the driver as he pointed to the outside bar. The driver quickly agreed and dropped him off on the empty street corner. The actor quickly pulled his hood over his head and paid the driver before getting out.

He approached one of the empty tables and took a seat before pulling out his phone. His fingers hesitated before they typed a message out to Reyna.

fdimensions1996:
i'm here
delivered 9:18 PM

fdimensions1996:
are you?
delivered 9:18 PM

softtofu:
i'm here
delivered 9:18 PM

Tom tried to ignore the excitement in his chest when he saw that she was calling from SnapChat. His thumb hesitantly hovered over the button before he pressed accept. And with hesitance hanging on his breath he finally spoke out to her in his fake American accent, "Hey."

"Hi," he heard her soft British voice speak. He heard a rustle on her side of the call before she continued. "I see you. You're wearing a gray hoodie, right?"

Tom furrowed his eyebrows in confusion as he stood up and got ready to turn around, but before he could he heard a rushed out comment from Reyna, "Wait, no, don't! Don't turn around, please. Can you . . . can you wait? When I tell you when you can come over. I'm behind the cement pillar. Just . . . just please wait."

"Of course," he replied softly. You fucker, his mind cursed at him. What if she's insecure? Don't pressure her, okay? Don't you dare fuck this up Thomas Holland.

"Okay, I - I think I'm ready." The actor walked over to the pillar with heavy steps, a racing heart, and his breathing uneven. This is it. This is actually happening.

He stood in front of the pillar, his eyes burning a glare into the obstacle almost as if by doing so he'd be able to see her. But he couldn't, and he wasn't going to force her to do that, not when she so clearly doesn't feel comfortable with him yet. So Tom turned around and had his back leaning against the pillar.

The Spider-Man actor heard her soft breathing, the crunch of dead leaves underneath her shoes as she tried to shift her weight. Tom closed his eyes as a large smile grew on his face. He said softly, "Hi, again."

"Hi," she said back in her soft, British accent. Something about her accent reminded him of home, the foggy weather, his family, his friends, everything. It was almost as if the sound of her voice triggered memories or emotions he thought were kept hidden. "I'm Reyna."

"I'm Theo."

"I can't believe we're doing this."

"Neither can I."

He heard a frustrated sigh come from her end and he couldn't help but assume the worst. All he could think about is that she was regretting this already, regretting to meet him. But what she said shocked him and made his chest tighten in pain.

"I'm sorry, but I can't look at you. Not without knowing that I'm hurting you," she apologized, her voice cracking at the end of her statement. She sucked in a shaking breath before exhaling as she tried to contain her tears. "Because you like me and I can't like you because - "

"You like him." It's okay, she was never yours in the first place.

"It doesn't matter, he doesn't like me back."

"He's a fucking idiot. Your feelings are valid, Reyna, don't ever think twice about that. You deserve the whole fucking world."

"Thank you. But I guess in a way he's always been my idiot as well as my world."

Rosé knew that this was a bad idea, because deep down she wants to see the face of her own Theo. She wanted to see what he looked like and maybe it's because she's curious. But deep down she knows it's because of her own selfish needs, that she wants to see the love in his eyes because she wanted to remember what it felt like to be loved. She wanted to see the love he had for her in his eyes, to get a glimpse of the love she deserved.

"I'm sorry, Theo."

"Don't be, I guess I've always expected it. But it doesn't matter, my feelings," he whispered brokenly. Tom shook his head as he tried to rid the aching pain in his chest. He clenched his fists by his sides, his nails digging into the soft skin of his palms. "I came here to say thank you. Thank you for being my friend, thank you for being there, thank you for writing the book. Thank you, Reyna Cohen, for everything."

"Why are you saying this? Why?" You know why, she told herself. He's leaving.

"Because I know that this is going to be our last encounter and I had to let you know how I felt. Because you deserve to realize the fact that you're fucking amazing and you can easily change someone's heart in a short span of time."

Quietness filled their tension like an author would. Their feelings remained in the air, their questions left unsolved and forgotten. Everything they worked for, everything they watched get built was crumbling around them. And Tom didn't know how to save their collapsing buildings that towered over the small safe home that they had built together.

He may play a hero, but that doesn't mean he was capable of saving everyone or everything.

Tom pushed himself off the wall, ready to leave. But before he could take a step further a hand reached out and grabbed his wrist. He looked down at his arm to see a small, pale, cold hand hold onto his wrist and held him there.

Her hands are so small.

"I don't want this to end, Theo. I want you to still be there for me, to still be my friend."

"Being your friend was something I was never going to stop anyways. Thank you, Reyna Cohen."

"Thank you, Theo Hartens. Will you . . . will you forget about me?"

"Maybe one day. Just like maybe one day you'll forget about me."

"I don't want that."

"Me neither. But that's okay, because you know why, Germany will always remember us."

♔ ♔ ♔

A/N;

RANT TIME. OKAY I FINISHED THIS UPDATE THIRTY MINUTES AGO. AND THEN WATTPAD WANTED TO BE AN ASS AND DELETE HALF OF IT. OKAY WATTPAD, I SEE YOU. SO THIS UPDATE DIDN'T GO HOW I WANTED, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT FUCK IT.

Anyways, calm me is back. I'm double updating because why the fuck not. I honestly spoil you guys way too much, but you guys are my babies. Anyways this will be the last update for awhile as I want to actually write the rest of this book and finish it and prewrite for Fine Lines before I finish it. Just so if I'm lacking updates I have updates to spare and upload so y'all won't be waiting forever.

Dedicated to primrosies! Thank you for the support!

Much Love Guys.

( written: september 18, 2017 )
( published: september 18, 2017 )