11:11
CHAPTER FIFTY SEVEN
❝IT'S 11:11; WHEN THERE'S NOT MUCH TIME LEFT TO THE DAY, WHEN WE USED TO MAKE WISHES AND LAUGH, AND EVERYTHING REMINDS ME OF YOU. THE WIND IS AS COLD AS THE EDGE OF YOUR HEART, WHEN I OPEN THE WINDOW YOU BLOW IN. WHEN THIS TIME PASSES WILL THIS BREAK UP BE OVER? WILL I FORGET YOU?❞

♔ ♔ ♔

      Love. What was love exactly? It's a word that's overused, a word that seemingly lost its meaning as time grew on. Because as people age, as society develops, and as the concept of love changes, love no longer meant the same thing as it once did. People have different ideals of love, different views of love. What I view as love could be entirely different than what you think of love.

      Tom always thought he knew what love is to him. Love was his parents and their motivation. Love was his brothers and playing around in their backyard as they cooed Tessa's name. Love was late night meals with Harrison as they watched movies together. Love was talking to Noah and Rosé, even if they were in Australia. Love was Camille and her sweet smile. Love was Theo and Reyna, their adventures and the sacrifices made for one another.

      Love is Reyna Cohen.

      Love is Rosé Cha.

      But the question remains, does his love for his Reyna Cohen change now that he knows it's his best friend? Is it possible for your view of love to change so suddenly?

      He asks himself this question as he ran through the airport. He raced to find the information booth ready to ask for what terminal the next flight to Seoul will be located. He raced to find her.

      Because even if he doesn't know what love may mean, it doesn't mean he doesn't love in her in another way. She's Rosie Girl, she's Rosé, she's Cha Chaewon, she's Roseanne Cha, she's softtofu, she's Reyna Cohen, she's his best friend.

      Maybe you've always loved her, he thought to himself as the noise around him grew numb. That thought along almost made him stop running. Could he have always loved Rosé? Was it even possible for him to love his best friend in that sense?

      When did he start to love her?

      "Happy Birthday, Tommy Boy!" a nine year old Rosé cheered brightly as she extended her arms out to give him his gift. A brightly wrapped, large yellow box was handed to him

      "You remember," Tom said in awe as he accepted her gift. He had a few friends who would wish him happy birthday, but Tom couldn't help but think they did it out of obligation.

      But standing in front of him was Rosé and Tom. The youngest had a gift in both her hands whilst her older brother tried to play it off as he held his gift out with one hand.

      "You remembered my birthday," he repeated with a hint of awe in his tone of voice. Tom blinked repeatedly to rid his eyes of the tears knowing that if he cried right now Rosé would tease him to no ends on how sappy he is. But he couldn't help it. This was the first time a classmate of his got him a gift for his birthday.

      Rosé rolled her eyes at his statement before she placed her gift in front of him on his table and did the same with Noah's. She shrugged her shoulders as she sat on the empty seats across from him. "Of course I did! Noah and I spent all week trying to get you the perfect gift. The prettier one is mine anyways."

      The two gifts looked nothing alike. Rosé's gift was wrapped in bright yellow wrapping paper with white polka dots pattern and a white bow placed on the top. Noah was drastically different with his brown paper packaging, his gift taking shape of a small rectangle. And whilst his sister's packaging was done neatly and carefully, Noah was the opposite with uneven edges and tape almost everywhere.

      "Open mine last!" Rosé cried excitedly as she practically threw Noah's gift his way. Tom laughed at his friend's enthusiasm but nodded at her wish. 

      Noah's gift wasn't much, but Tom couldn't help but laugh at how odd it was. It was nothing more than a stack of index cards, each had something written on it. For example the first card read 'Noah Cha Coupons.' One had something that said 'Can Copy Any Homework' or 'Free Foot Massage.'

      "Thank you," Tom said genuinely as he looked up at his friend. Noah nodded and coughed awkwardly into his fist as he looked away.

      Finally Tom turned to Rosé's nicely presented gift. The Korean girl nodded encouragingly. Tom shook his head as he finally began to open the gift. He couldn't help but tear at the wrapping paper. His mum would've gone ballistic as such a thing, especially if Rosé was the one who did the wrapping. But his friend couldn't care less and didn't say anything about him tearing the wrapping paper.

      It was beautiful.

      It was a cut long, the center smooth whilst the circumference was rough with its bark. The smooth side was curved with Tom's name messily near the bottom, the obvious work of Rosé shown. But carved in the center was something in Korean. 

      "It says 'Happy Birthday,'" she read for him, pointing at each character as she said the word. She smiled proudly as she placed her small hands on her hips. "Dad helped me cut the log, but I did the carving! With help of course. But it took me a few days to make it nice and pretty for you. So you better hang it up in your room, okay? I know it's not cool or a toy, but I think it's pretty and — "

      "Thank you, Rosie Girl."

      He ignored her bandaged fingers that were covered in white plaster.

      It was for him.

      Tom's chest tightened at the memory, but it only pushed him to run faster. Why would she go so far for him? Why would she do so much for him? Was he that worth it to endure pain for all these years of friendship? No, he couldn't be. 

      But it's Rosie, your Rosie, he told himself. You'd take her pain away if you could.

      And it's true, because he'd go to the end of the Earth if it meant he could see her.

       Isn't this what you're doing right now?

      Because his world was slowly ending and it couldn't be help. His world is Rosé. Maybe not in the sense where the only important thing on this planet is her, no, that's not true. There are a lot of important things to him. But she is his world because he'll revolve around her, his focus has always been her and her well being.

      Why is that?

      Was it because he felt this need to repay her after all these years of friendship?

      Does this mean that he doesn't love her?

      Tom smiled excitedly as he leaned closer to his laptop camera. He shook the frame and whined once more. His excitement couldn't be held back, not when he wanted to know all the details. But of course Rosé wouldn't be Rosé if she didn't tease him with such information.

      He even went as far as to pout and bat his eyelashes at his friend. Of course, all he received from Rosé was an eye roll and a scoff before a flow of Korean curses passed her lips. "Tom, you're 16 years old, don't act like a child."

      "Not unless you let me meet your boyfriend! Is he there?" Tom asked as he tried to spot his best friend's boyfriend from the camera. Rosé snorted at his desperate attempt to meet her boyfriend, but she understood why Tom was making such a big deal out of it. After all Austin is her first serious relationship.

      "You're going to scare him off, Tommy Boy."

      "Rosie Girl I let you meet my first girlfriend!"

      "Let? You practically texted me pictures of her almost every day. By the second week that you guys were dating I knew her favorite food, what's her favorite movie, and that she's scared of the number 37."

      "Please? I promise I won't embarrass you."

      "Fine."

      ". . . for now."

      "THOMAS!"

      "Okay, okay, I'm sorry! Now can I meet him already?"

      A sigh left Rosé as she reluctantly nodded her head. She extended her hand out and beckoned her boyfriend over who was in the room the entire room. Austin soon came into frame with a shy smile and a small wave. Tom returned the wave with a forced smile.

      Why are you like this, he scolded himself. This is Rosie's first ever boyfriend. Don't fuck this up for her, Holland or else she'll never find a man in her life. If she's single for the rest of her life than so do you. Don't do this to yourself or her.

      Maybe it's because it's Rosé's first ever boyfriend. Hell, when Noah introduced his first girlfriend to him he basically worshiped the floor his friend walked upon. There's a difference in Tom's eyes. Because Rosé is his best friend, someone he can't bear to see get hurt.

      There was a specific type that Rosé's father likes when it comes to boys that are interested in his daughter. Tom knows of course, I mean David Cha was the type of man who'd show up during a Skype call and be like 'Hey Tom, you looking a bit peckish, you eating alright?' But back to the case of Rosé's taste in boys it'd be the Korean Church boys who played the guitar, had long bangs, and exceeded in math — mainly because everyone knew that Rosé is utter shit when it came to math.

      But Austin was nothing like that with his dirty blonde hair, sun kissed skin, and bright green eyes.

      "Nice to meet you," Austin greeted nervously. Rosé, who sat next to him, giggled at her boyfriend's awkwardness before she leaned towards him and gave him a peck on the cheek. "I'm Austin. You must be Tom, the best friend, right?"

      "The best friend, second brother, and the getaway driver for whenever Rosé robs a bank. You're the boyfriend, right?" Tom tried to joke, but realized how utterly stupid he sounded. Of course Austin was the boyfriend, it wasn't like Rosé didn't just introduce him or that he just found out about Austin's existence.

      "Yeah, I'm the boyfriend," Austin laughed, "And the lookout for when Rosé has to hide a body."

      What they're saying is stupid.

      But why is he getting jealous?

      No, no, no, that doesn't mean anything. That doesn't mean that you like her, he tried to shake off. But every fiber in his being ached as the memory of how he felt in that exact moment was resurrected. 

      Tom was panting and almost ran right into the desk if he didn't catch himself. The ladies at the desk jumped at the sudden appearance of the sweaty, tired Tom. But the actor was in a rush and they didn't know why.

      "What terminal is for the flight to Seoul?" he rushed out, his breathing uneven as his lungs begged for air.

      "I'm sorry sir, I don't think I know what you're talking about — "

      "Seoul, Seoul, South Korea!" he exclaimed as he waved his arms animatedly. "There's — There's a flight to Seoul, South Korea. The flight is soon, I — I don't know what time, but I know that it's soon! Which terminal is it taking off from?"

      "Terminal 3 Gate 74 — "

      "Thank you!" Tom shouted over his shoulder as he took off once more. His own terminal for the flight to Puerto Rico was in Terminal 1 Gate 25. It was on the other side of the airport. He wasn't sure what time Rosé's flight was taking off, but he couldn't take the risk.

      He didn't get a chance to say everything he wanted to her. Because there were things he wanted to say to Reyna, but now he'll have to say it to Rosé Cha.

      He wasn't ready to let this become a goodbye, not now, and not ever. Maybe it was this sudden panic that she was leaving, that she now might actually leave him. Maybe that was the scariest part of it all, that it was so unexpected. But it only made him regret the things he hasn't said before, how he took her for granted, how he always expected her to just magically be by his side no matter what.

      Tom needed to say sorry.

      Sleepovers with the Cha twins has always been interesting. Tom started having sleepovers with the twins three months after their friendship. Of course, David and Annie didn't mind Rosé going over as long as her brother followed, not that Noah minded. They'd take turns, if they slept over at Tom's house for the weekend then for the next sleepover they'd sleep at the twins' place.

      There were always loads snacks ready for the group of friends, movies stacked and ready for them, and fresh blankets and pillows to make forts. Noah was always the one to fall asleep first, his inability to sleep late was something he made habit of because of his father. No matter how much he's slept or how little sleep he got he always slept at ten PM. That of course left the mischievous behavior of Tom and Rosé.

      Tom wasn't the type to stir trouble everywhere he went. But if he was alone with Rosé that all changes. Maybe Rosé was a bad influence, but Nikki Holland never saw the sweet girl as that. She always saw the cute little Korean girl as Tom's way to interact with others and to become more social. Tom would always complain about how Rosé would force him to go to the park with him and a few of the other kids in their class or how 'annoying' it was that Rosé always wanted to go to an event where the other kids were. He knew it was because he was scared of getting humiliated and embarrassed in front of the other kids, but what he didn't know was that if Rosé was there no one dared to do anything.

      Annie Shin would always joke that Korean women love as much as they hate.

      In a way this was almost nostalgic for the actor as he watched Rosé sleep on the spot next to him. They weren't kids anymore but young adults. Things have changed, people have changed, but one thing for sure is that Rosé hasn't changed, not entirely at least.

      Sleepovers were sort of a safe haven for them. Mainly because the presence of one another keeps them sane and calm once more.

      With the two living in different countries that safe haven became less accessible. It wasn't the same, but they made do with what they had. They'd Skype each other, talk, watch movies together, share musics, continue their karaoke night, and even fell asleep together or they'd watch each other sleep.

      Tom doesn't remember much of their sleepovers other than the adrenaline and caffeine rush they'd experience. But tonight brought back a flood of memories that Tom thought were lost forever. They weren't, they were simply repressed.

      For example, Rosé can't ever sleep on her back, stomach, or right side. She always has to sleep on her left meaning she was facing right the pillow wall as she slept. One arm curled up underneath her head, the other in front of her clutching the blankets against her chest. She had one leg under the covers, the other was revealed as it was placed on top. There was a small drip of drool hanging from the corner of her lip and her lips were parted as snores were heard.

      The Cha's snore. David Cha had the loudest and was surprisingly on beat. Tom could always count when the next snore will happen and how long it'll occur before it stops and continues. As for Noah he was almost similar to his father, except it wasn't a aggressive or loud, but more nose whistles than anything. With Annie being a quiet sleeper Rosé's snores were much more tame compared to her father and brother.

      Tom hesitantly held his hands together as he stared at his friend. But then he clapped twice before he stopped and waited for her reaction.

      She stopped snoring.

      A snort left Tom as he clamped his hand over his mouth to stop his laughing. But his body shook with chuckles as he tried to calm himself down so he didn't wake Rosé up. Tom closed his eyes as he tried to steady the ache in his stomach that grew from laughing so hard.

      "You haven't changed at all," he murmured as he looked over the pillow wall to look at his friend.

      That was it. That alone should've told him everything.

      He loves her.

      He loves Roseanne Cha.

      "God dammit!" Tom cursed under his breath. The realization only pushed him to run even more. He shook his head as he tried to pick up the pace despite his burning calves. He needed to see her.

      "I fell in love with my best friend — how cliché is that?"

♔ ♔ ♔

A/N;

I'm super in love with this chapter. I worked really hard on it so I hope you guys like it as much as I do. I have college and career and we go to the computer labs to work on our powerpoint presentation, but I prefer to do that at home. So legit I'm spending an hour working on updates for Wattpad. 

In other news we're almost done! I think I'll start bonus chapters after the epilogue, depending on how much I've written for Fine Lines. So far I've finished the summary, playlist, epigraph, and half of the first chapter. But I want to get at least five chapters ready!

Also, I think I might be starting another Tom Holland fanfic soon? Who knows! This one touches home as it deals with racism, conservative parents, and what not!

Dedicated to starfragment ( again ) because Catie is an absolute bean who deserves the world!

Much Love Guys.

( written: september 28, 2017 )
( published: september 28, 2017 )