ACT I SCENE IV

CLOPE THE BLANKET, BOOFIN THE CLOCK, and KEETIN THE WALL (who is just a face that can move along walls) are seen in CLOPE's house

CLOPE: No!

BOOFIN: Oh, come on Clope! Why not?

CLOPE: It's too scary!

KEETIN: You went out there yesterday.

CLOPE: Yeah, but the crowd wasn't large like it is today!

BOOFIN: What do you mean?

CLOPE: I'm scared of large crowds!

BOOFIN sighs

BOOFIN: Of course you are.

KEETIN: But not small crowds?

Boofin: Just come on!

Clope: Wait! What if one of the presidents is wearing red????

KEETIN and BOOFIN exchange exasperated looks

Boofin: Just come on!!

Keetin: If I had hands, I would drag you out there right now.

Clope: But I'm scared of walls with hands!

YIY's head looks through the door

YIY: Clope?

CLOPE: AAAAH!!!

CLOPE quickly hides under something

BOOFIN: Clope! It's just President Yiy!

CLOPE: I'm scared of giant heads looking through my door!

KEETIN looks at YIY

KEETIN: He's scared of everything.

CLOPE: Keetin, I'm scared of people telling people I'm scared of everything!

BOOFIN: Oh, brother.

CLOPE: Boofin, tell it to go away!

YIY: It????

BOOFIN: If I do, will you come outside?

CLOPE: Mm... maybe...

BOOFIN turns to YIY

BOOFIN: If you want him to come out, you'll have to stop looking through the door.

YIY: Okay.

YIY turns to NA

They're coming

NA: Yay!

KEETIN's face moves to the outside of the house.

KEETIN: They're coming.

YIY: Yay!

NA: You knew that already.

YIY: Did you ask It?

NA: What???

KEETIN: Which it?

YIY: It, of course.

KEETIN: Oh, that one.

NA: How did you know about It?

KEETIN: I didn't, but you made it sound like I was supposed to.

YIY: That's good.

NA: DID YOU ASK IT!!!!!!

YIY: NO!!!!!!

NA: Okay.

KEETIN: How odd.

YIY: Verys.

NA: Such.

BOOFIN and CLOPE come out of the house

KEETIN: That took a long time.

BOOFIN: Not my fault!

YIY: Such is fault of Clopey scaredness.

NA: Yup.

CLOPE whimpers.

CLOPE; Boofin, he is wearing red! Let me go back inside!

BOOFIN: Just close your eyes or something!

CLOPE: Okay.

He closes his eyes.

NA: What withs him and redness?

BOOFIN: Of all the things he's scared of--

KEETIN: Which is like, everything...

BOOFIN: He's most scared of the color red.

YIY: Why???

CLOPE: Cause it's just so... so... red!!

BOOFIN: So why are you here again?

CUCUMBER: They got bored.

BOOFIN: Ooh, bored!

CLOPE: I'm scared of being bored. And bored people.

KEETIN: Clope, you don't have to tell us everything you're scared about. If it exists, we'll assume you're scared of it.

CLOPE: Hey, that's mean! I'm scared of mean people! AAAA-

He tries to run inside, but BOOFIN steps on him and stops him.

NA: So that we are not bored, maybe you could introduce us to all the new Things!

BOOFIN: Sure!

KEETIN: Okay!

CLOPE: Do I have to?

KEETIN and BOOFIN: Yes!

CLOPE: Aw!

As the three of them (mostly KEETIN and BOOFIN) begin introducing the Presidents to the other Things, a crayon, bandana, and pen are seen standing somewhat off to the side.

PLANDANA THE BANDANA: The Presidentses are here! We could impress boss by un-odding them!

PIKLAYON THE CRAYON: No! They will be very hard to un-odd. We must do what boss told us to and un-odd these... "Things".

PLANDANA: But I like hard things! Challenges... rocks... um...

BLENNY THE PEN: Fondateur ne sera pas comme beaucoup si nous ne parvenons pas ... (English subtitle: Boss won't like it very much if we fail...)

PLANDANA: Boocooshee?

PIKLAYON: It's French, nobody understands it.

BLENNY: Je fais! (I do!)

PLANDANA: Shoe fay to you too!

PIKLAYON: We need to focus here! We need a plan.

BLENNY: J'ai un plan! (I have a plan!)

PIKLAYON: Stop talking nonsense and start thinking of a plan!

The Presidents are seen looking down at a slinky that they have just met.

CLICLICLICLI THE SLINKY: I'm Clicliclicli the Slinky and I feel CRAZZYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!

He goes crazy and tangles himself.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPS!!!!!!!!!!!

CLOPE: AAAAH!! I'm scared of crazy slinkies!!!

He tries to run away again, but Yiy stops him.

YIY: Comeziness, you aren't done introducing us!

CLOPE whines and follows slowly behind them as they go to meet more Things.

PIKLAYON: Hey, that blanket over there is scared of everything!! Maybe we could start with him!

BLENNY: Oui! (Yes!)

PLANDANA: That's the one French I know!

BLENNY: Yay! Quelqu'un m'a entendu! (Yay! Someone understood me!)

PLANDANA: Quail tongues? Why????

BLENNY sighs.

PIKLAYON: Come on guys, we need to start working here!

PLANDANA: That sounds good! Let's do that!

PIKLAYON: Do you even remember what I said the plan should be yet?

PLANDANA: Uh... does it involve ice cream?

PIKLAYON: NO!!!!!! IT WAS THAT WE NEED TO UN-ODD THE SCARED BLANKET FIRST BECAUSE THAT WILL BE EASIEST!!!!!!!

PLANDANA: Oh. How do you un-odd a someone?

The Presidents, BOOFIN, and CLOPE walk towards them; KEETIN slides his face to the closest building.

NA: And whom is theses Thingses?

PLANDANA: Huh?

YIY: Who are you?

PLANDANA: I'm Plandana the Bandana!

NA: What about you two?

PIKLAYON: I'm Piklayon the Crayon!

BLENNY: Et je suis B'leux la Plume! (And I'm Blenny the Pen!)

YIY: What about a plumb?

PIKLAYON: If he was answering your question, then he was saying "I'm Blenny the Pen". He can only speak French.

BLENNY: Ouais. Je ne parle que français. (Yeah. I only speak French.)

NA: But cans you understands the what I'm saying?

BLENNY: Ouais! (Yep!)

NA: That's weird.

YIY: Hmm... something is differential about theses threeses... I don't quites know what it is though...

NA: I think we meetesded all of them! So we can go now.

YIY: And be bored????

NA: We could visit them Flimmitz!

YIY: Oh! Okay! Goodbyeses to all Thingees!

The Presidents begin walking away waving, the Things all respond with "bye" and such.

BLENNY: Au revoir! (Bye!)

CLOPE, BOOFIN, and KEETIN start walking (or moving) back to one of their houses.

CLOPE: Can I open my eyes now?

Their voices fade into the distance as they continue talking.

PIKLAYON: Well, that was close.

PLANDANA: What did he notice that was... uh... differentified... about us?

BLENNY: Nous ne sommes pas d'ici comme tout le monde, vous vous souvenez? Nous avons été engendré sur l'île Elephant, pas ici! (We aren't from here like everyone else, remember? We were spawned on Elephant Island, not here!)

PIKLAYON ignores him.

PIKLAYON: I don't know. And it was differential, not differentified.

PLANDANA: Oh yeah.

He pauses, thinking.

What's a differential?

PIKLAYON: We're losing focus here! Okay, we know that we should try to stay away from the presidents as much as possible, and that we want to stay near that blanket.

PLANDANA: Yeah! Why again though?

BLENNY: Ne vous écoutez jamais? (Don't you ever listen?)

PLANDANA: What are neevoos?

PIKLAYON: Hurry! He's leaving!

PLANDANA: Who?

PIKLAYON groans.

PIKLAYON: The scared blanket, obviously! We need to follow!

PLANDANA: Oh, yeah.

PIKLAYON begins leading them slowly in the same direction as CLOPE and the others. PIKLAYON whispers to his group.

PIKLAYON: Slowly and stealthily!

PLANDANA responds loudly.

PLANDANA: What?

PIKLAYON: That means be quiet!

PLANDANA does not be quiet.

PLANDANA: Oh. Okay.

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