!This story contains mature content of sexual assault, swears, and mentions of rape. Please do not read if these topics trigger you!

Notes:
This is an excerpt of a bigger story I'm working on that's still in the (very, very early) planning stage, but suddenly I had this scene pop into my head and felt that it was important to get down on 'paper' and share. However, as it is part of a bigger world / story of my own creation, some things may not make much sense so I have put down some info to know about the characters/setting before reading:
• This is a story about two wolfshifters who are in love called Jasper and Maddie
• Jasper is wanting to give Maddie some classic 'human' experiences (as she ran away from human society when she was young) so they go to a bar together (though 'Mads' personally would have preferred to stay home and read as she's not big on drinking, but decides to come along because "what the hell, what is life without new experiences?")
• Because it's a human place, they can't shift into wolves as the human world (as a whole) doesn't know Wolf shifters exist
• In this universe, Wolf Shifters / 'Werewolves' do have a weakness to Silver (as per the usual silver dagger / bullet legends), however not in the way people think. Rather, they can be essentially mind-controlled by Silver when intentionally manipulated, which obviously makes it a dangerous substance for them
• Also, Wolfshifters, though rapid healers, are not invulnerable. As Jasper once pointed out, "Well yeah, a bullet or well-placed stab, Silver or otherwise, would kind of kill pretty much anyone."
• There is also a plant called 'Moonlace' that has to been grown/harvested in specific conditions (so humans couldn't just stumble upon it and accidentally make it, if they have access to it, they'd have to have intentionally done so), which is a vaporous liquid which has a somewhat similar effect as Silver, but much much fainter and more serves to make wolf-shifters more inclined to trust a person and suppresses natural instinct of "this person is bad", serving to muddle their minds and make them more easily persuaded.

• So, story wise, essentially what has happened just before the start of this story is that Jasper and Maddie got into a fight and Jasper leaves. As he leaves he says "well, I guess we'll talk later then!" And Maddie turns toward him (and subsequently away from her drink for literally 2-4 seconds) and says "fine! See you later then." Then she turns and continues drinking her drink as a handsome, clean-shaven guy has sat next to her and starts talking to her, nice and friendly, and being kind and listening to her as she rants about the fight and how she didn't even want to come to the bar anyway and a number of trivial topics etc. And then the story starts / picks up 10-20 minutes later.

• Also please note that, whilst elements such as wolf-shifters, mind-controlling silver, and 'Moonlace' are fictional, this is a very real scenario that can happen with spiked, non-spiked, or even no drinks or drugs at all. Some people may read real life stories about people who get sexually assaulted and/or raped and may think things such as "that would never happen to me." Or "Well I'd fight back!" (sadly my character Maddie once thought the same) but the thing is it can happen to anyone, regardless of circumstance or how they are dressed, whether you do or don't know the person, what your gender is, any and all of it really. And thinking about how you'd respond on the outside of a scenario vs how you actually respond when in that scenario are very different things. The thing with sexual assault (and rape) is that very often people experience a psychological response known as "fawning" (this also happens with victims of bullying), in which your brain acts to protect you from your nervous system as it's overloaded with the trauma that is unfolding, and you 'just go along with' what happens (you may also 'freeze', or dissociate, all other common responses that can happen in conjunction with fawning), even if you try to fight back because it is a terrifying, traumatising thing to experience. So, when reading this (fictional) story, please keep all of this (non-fictional reality) in mind and be respectful when commenting, thank you.
• I would like to note also that I (thankfully) have personally never experienced Sexual Assault, and I sincerely hope that I (and all of you guys) never do, so this story and all of this writing is purely from research and reading I've done. If any one of you reading have experienced these things, I am so incredibly sorry that you have gone through that experience, and please know that my PM's are always open if you need to talk or just need someone to listen <3. This story may most likely be uncomfortable and/or triggering, so please don't feel the need to read it if it will be upsetting or harmful to you. If you choose to read regardless, please know that I genuinely have tried my best to convey how I imagine how it would feel, and my only goal is to raise awareness of what an incredibly horrible (beyond horrible!) thing sexual assault and rape is.

And now, the story...

Story:
"Now come on sweetheart, don't be shy," he smirked as he advanced towards me.

I stepped back in a daze, a small gasp escaping my lips as I felt the storage room wall against my back.

There was nowhere to go.
Shoot.

How had I gotten into this mess? My foggy brain wondered, alcohol slurring my thoughts and making them slow as molasses.

One moment I had been at the bar and then I'd fought with Jasper. Then this handsome man, who had seemed nice and friendly and listened to me (stupid reasons to trust anyone, I know) had started talking to me and everything had become kind of foggy until this well-dressed piece of a man had lead me into here and his whole demeanour had changed.

The realisation belatedly clicked. He'd probably spiked my drink. But when? There has only been one moment and it couldn't have been more than a literal 2-4 seconds... but then, I guess that's all it's takes. Just looking away from my drink for one second.

He grinned, his initally-suave smile now becoming sinister,
"Well, well, let's see what we're working with here."

I had read dozens of stories like this, and always part of me had foolishly thought "well, that'll never happen to me. I wouldn't let that happen. I never even go to the bar, and even then I wouldn't look away from my drink for a second."  How stupid I was.

I always wondered why they always just went along with it and never just fought back. I always told myself that I would fight. But now that I was in the situation, I understood.

I couldn't.

I was in shock.
My brain constantly repeating "this can't be happening, this can't be happening, this can't be happening."

I felt like I was on the outside, watching all of this happening as the stranger moved to slightly lift and reach under my shirt. I tried to struggle but I was pinned against the wall.

"No... stop. I don't want to. Stop!" I tried to say as I struggled, tried to make him understand that he had misinterpreted whatever "signals", if any, I had gave him, my brain desperately holding onto the hope that this was just some mistake.

But his grin only grew, as though my cries for him to stop was just some cute noise, like the squeaking of a Guinea pig.

Fricking sicko.

He moved his hands to caress my back, the other creeping up under the front of my shirt. Places where Jasper had never touched, never even thought of touching, gentleman that he was.

I felt my cries for help, for him to just stop, strangle in my throat and die before escaping my lips. I couldn't move, I couldn't fight back. I couldn't breathe. I felt like I was just floating, watching my body being defiled from afar, and I vaguely wished that I would just black out, or that my psyche would just float far away, until he left me alone.

It felt so wrong to have a stranger touching me in this way but I felt powerless to fight back even as my mind screeched, I wanted to just break down and cry, or just die, or just do something other than stand here and let this happen to me. Goddess knew I was a good fighter, that if I could just move I could fight him off, despite my slowed reaction time. But it felt as though any connection because my mind and my muscles had been severed. Worst still, I felt my body involuntarily respond to his touch and I hated myself for it, I was digusted by myself. What the hell was wrong with me?! I didn't give consent. Stupid biological response! This guy was sexually assaulting me. He was probably about to fricking rape me. I was completely and utterly repulsed with myself, with him, with this whole situation.

I tried to hold it in, but he grinned wider and wider with every involuntary noise that escaped me.

STOP IT!!! I screamed. But that shout wouldn't come out, no matter how much I tried to concentrate on forcing the air out of my lungs and forming the words.

Well then, maybe you deserve it, a tiny part of me pricked scornfully.
No, I mentally tried to tell myself, no. Nothing. Nothing. Justifies what the hell is happening right now. You can't. You can't think that way. If you do then all hope is gone.
That is, if there is even any hope still left...

A yelp escaped me as he pushed me even harder into the wall and licked his lips,
"How about we move things along Darling?"

No. Nonononono. I widened my eyes and gave a small shake of my head - the only movement I could muster - but he just ignored it with a soft chuckle,
"Don't worry Darling. You seemed to like the other stuff well enough, so you'll love what's next."

STOP IT YOU SICKO! I wanted to scream but the words seemed just as unable to escape as I was. I DON'T WANT THIS! DON'T FOOL YOURSELF YOU ARSEHOLE! STOP IT! STOP! PLEASE! NO! STOP!

His hand drifted down to my jeans even as his face, his cursedly handsome face, came towards my own. Knowing what was about to happen, my panic increased and, regaining some sense of control over my body, I tried to wiggle away whilst I faintly breathed trembly words of "No, please no."

But he was too strong for me, drugged as I was. And part of me couldn't help but faintly think that even if I hadn't been drugged, even if I wasn't slightly tipsy, I still would've been rendered powerless by the shock of what was happening.
I was fawning, or freezing, I couldn't remember which. Just that I had read about it once and it was some automatic psychological response that was meant to protect you, and keep you "safe" from an overloading nervous system. But I'd take the chances of my stupid nervous system over what was happening to me right now any day.
But, unfortunately, my body didn't agree.
I remained frozen, my mind watching these disgusting events unfold from some far off place.

As he just kept leaning forwards, I tried to turn my face away but he just forced it back against the wall with an irritated,
"Just stay still, you stupid B*tch."

Then his tone went sickenly sweet again, "Sorry. I mean... stay still please, Darling."

I wished I could vomit that smug smile off his face, but somehow, nauseated as I was, nothing but a shaky exhale came out. I wished I could slap him, but my hand was limp, my arm felt too heavy to move.

Kick him in the balls! a fragment of my self-defense class from when I was a kid screamed. He was in the perfect position for it, but my foot seemed attached to the floor, my leg like concrete.

He was so close now that I could smell his stupid minty breathe.

Frick.

I couldn't get out.
I couldn't breathe.
I couldn't shift.
I couldn't escape.

I squeezed my eyes shut, my breath ragged as I tried to block out what was about to happen. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of gazing into my scared eyes like the sicko he was as he- he-

I heard the door open, and the light of the hallway pierced my eyelids.

~

I opened my eyes, which smarted at the brightness after being locked in the dim for goodness knows how long.

I almost melted with relief as my temporary blindness faded to reveal Jasper standing in the doorway.

But at the same time I felt... ashamed. Ashamed that he saw me in this position. Ashamed that I had been naive enough to let myself get into this situation. But also irrationally ashamed of what he thought might be going on. I knew how it looked, like he and I had fought with each other and I was now hooking up with some rando, but I bugged him with my eyes, hoping he would tell that something was wrong, that I wasn't here by choice, that I was a captive without chains.

"Is... everything okay here?" He asked, as uncertainly as everything he does.

"Everything's just fine, isn't it sweetheart?" The man's voice sharpened slightly and I was vaguely aware of the sensation of a cold point of metal just below my rib cage - the hand no longer hovered above the zipper of my jeans - and just out of Jasper's line of sight.

I inwardly seethed despite how shakey I felt. Maybe this guy was used to bullying other victims into pretending everything was fine, but if he thought I was that scared of a little slice then he had another thing coming, all I had to do was scream and move quickly, and Jasper would have my back. And if I got a little nick in the process so what? It would heal quick enough.

I glanced at the man, and, sufficently fuelled by the satisfied smirk on his face I opened my mouth to tell Jasper that everything was not 'just fine' when I felt it.

It wasn't just any metal.

It was Silver.

Shoot.

I just needed to bite my tongue and taste some blood, and then the copper and iron would ground me enough to break away. I quietly put a little corner of my tongue between my teeth. It was going to hurt, but it was the only way to counterbalance the Silver's effect on me. Then, just as I was about to subtly bite it, the man glanced at me and gave a hearty, fake laugh with a warning only I could hear.

"Now, don't bite your tongue darling," I halted mid-action, fighting his suggestion with every fibre of my being as I tried to bite my tongue. Just one drop of blood. One drop was all I needed to break out of this. But I couldn't, the Silver had been in contact with my skin for too long. "Don't be shy, tell this solid guy that everything's fine, and this is where you want to be."

I felt my mouth involuntary open to say the words but I clamped it shut again, continuing to inward struggle against the mental chains he was weaving around me with every second.

Jasper looked on, his brow still furrowed. The idiot! Couldn't he tell that something was wrong?! But as the guy flashed him a charismatic smile I realised this guy was persuasive. His aura was the kind that made you want to believe him. And, as the heat of his turned neck gave off another whiff of his cologne, I realised why.

How hadn't I picked up on this before?

Moonlace.
The persuasion of it's subtle, nearly undetectable scent, was near-overpowering in the confined space.

Jasper's eyes turned to me and I locked my wide eyes with his. Help, I tried to say, but the word wouldn't come out.
"Are you sure everything is okay here Mads?"

The guy turned his face away and muttered low enough so only I could hear, "say it." in a commanding tone that the Silver (combined with the alcohol and whatever he spiked me with) left me powerless to refuse.

"Everything's fine. I-" I tried to prevent myself from saying the rest but it tumbled out regardless after a moments pause, "I- this is where I want to be."

At saying the words that this disgusting man wanted me to say, I felt the involuntary tingle of following the Silver's command and, inspite of myself, a goofy smile spread on my face. Stop it you idiot! It is bad. This is bad! Stop smiling! The Silver is bad. B. A. D. Bad!
I quickly exerted enough control to stop the stupid curve of my lips, though they still twitched at the edge.

I tried desperately to break this man's hold over me, just enough for me to shout "help!", but I could only stand there, motionless, hoping with all my heart that Jasper could read the message in my eyes. Struck by a thought in my haze, I began to blink at him, hoping the lesson I'd taught him that one day about Morse code had stuck.
Quick blink, quick blink, quick blink. Slow blink, slow blink-
"Stop." The man said under the pretense of a lover's whisper - the feeling of his fresh-but-foul breath against my neck making me feel itchy. Violated.
I stopped blinking.

Sensing that Jasper was still watching, he whispered, "now laugh as if I've said something funny."

The sound slipped out before I could stop it. A flirtatious giggle which I didn't recognise, and I immediately hated. Again that happy buzz filled my mind and I hated myself for enjoying it. Hated the way the fake smile stuck to my face and this time wouldn't go away. Frick.

The man caressed my face, gently turning it away from Jasper. His touch felt so wrong. It was dirty and foul, and I felt in that moment that no amount of soap would rid me of the awful feel and memory of that touch. Of hands that didn't belong anywhere near me but were now stroking my face as though they belonged to them. And as much as I tried I couldn't move. I couldn't get out. I couldn't breathe.

He tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear, as he scanned my face with a smug, satisfied smile, taking in my trembling lips (despite the smile they were forced into by the Silver) and wide, scared eyes. He knew. Of course he knew. And I had already known that he knew, but some part of me had struggled with reconciling the thought with any human being until this moment.
He knew I was terrified, that I just wanted to get away from him, that I didn't want him touching me in this way. And looking at that handsome-but-ugly face I realised something that filled me with disgust and loathing, and made me want to hurl.
He was loving his ability to violate me in this way. He was relishing controlling me against my will.
He was enjoying it.

This should have been enough to snap me out of whatever shock I was in, Silver or no, just enough to run, to hit him, to scream, just do something. But I couldn't. I was immobile. My mind was shrieking but my body was frozen in fear.

The man sighed as he turned towards Jasper, acting as though he'd had only just realised,
"Oh, you're still here. Can't you see that we want some privacy?"

Jasper wavered for a moment as the Moonlace muddled his senses, looking as though he was about to leave, and my heart dropped. No, don't go.

Then, after another glance at me, he looked resolute and gestured to me,
"Well sorry, the boss wants us. We have to go. Now."

"Are you sure?" The man asked Jasper, his voice laden with authority that made you question every thought you ever had without his permission.

"I..." Jasper hesitated then shook his head as he said resolutely, "yes I'm sure. So, sorry to interrupt whatever moment you guys are having but we need to go. Our boss isn't happy when we keep her waiting."

The man's mouth twitched and I could tell he was thinking he couldn't stand the very insult that a woman could be, and was, a boss.

Misogynistic pig.

With his dirty, controlling gaze diverted from me for a moment I found that this, in conjunction with my disgust of him, was enough to temporarily loosen the control of the Silver. I gave him a neat push back, wincing with pain of the involuntary slice of Silver, and whirled away from him, with what should have been a snarky "can't keep the boss waiting." but came out as a hoarse whisper.

But, with quicker reaction time than I have him credit for (though I suppose my movements were slowed from the spiked alcohol), he grabbed my wrist, and I felt the prick of Silver again, only now it was on my back.
"Now sweetheart, can't your 'boss' wait just a few more minutes? Surely nothing can be urgent enough to interrupt..." he moved closer, "us time?... Stay."

I felt the sway of the Silver quickly reinserting itself after the brief lapse of contact, and I felt my body physically sway ever so slightly in response, on the precipice between Jasper and this man.

Just step towards Jasper. My muddled mind thought. But I was mentally and emotionally exhausted after my ordeal, my limbs were trembling, and my head was aching, still dazed from the effect of the alcohol, the spike, and - as I now realised - the Moonlace.

Jasper jerked his head towards the doorway, trying to sound cheerful, though I could see that he had firmly realised that something was wrong,
"Come on Mads, the boss wants us. We don't have all night."

"Darling." The man began to croon in my ear, and I knew I had to act quickly before the Silver retook full control.

I bit my tongue. Hard.
Ouch.

The man continued speaking, and for a moment I felt the urge to obey his command almost overwhelm me, but then the taste of blood filled my mouth, and the down-to-earth, metalic Copper and Iron broke the spell just enough for me to take a step towards Jasper.

I stumbled towards him and he grabbed my arm to support me. His touch, once so familiar, made me inwardly recoil, but I had to deal with it for now, I could barely stand by myself, let alone walk.

"Whelp. See you." Said Jasper rather awkwardly, his tone trying to be upbeat but coming out as rather brusque. He wheeled us around and, before the man could have time to react or regather his persuasive influence, he began marching me down the hall, babbling something about work and how 'the boss' wasn't pleased because we had screwed something up, but his chatter just floated over my head.

I need to get away.

~

Once we out of sight of the man's menancing, intoxicating presence, Jasper ceased purposefully striding, and stopped himself midsentence as he turned to me,
"Holy Frick, are you okay Maddie?"

I slowly shook my head, my brain barely able to  comprehend what had just happened,
"I... I don't. I don't know."

As I became aware of the fact that his arm was still holding mine in a tight, nervous grip, I tried to shake it off but I was too weak.

Panic overtaking me as I suddenly felt the filth of touching hands in place of ones I had once trusted, I lost it.
"Let go. Let go! LET GO OF ME DAMMIT!"

Jasper immediately let go and moved away, putting his hands up so I could see them.
"Goddess, I'm so sorry Maddie, I should have been quicker to find you."

"No, it's..." My voice died out. It wasn't fine. Nothing about what just happened was 'fine'. Instead, I asked, "how did you know?"

"Know what?"

"That I- that I needed your help?"

Jasper looked abashed,
"Well, after we fought... I went and sat elsewhere, watching you with an eye, just cause I wanted to make sure you stayed safe, being your first time at the bar and all." He looked down, avoiding my gaze, "But then I turned around for just one moment and when I looked back you were both gone. I'm so-" his voice broke, "I'm so, so sorry Mads. I shouldn't have gotten mad at you like that. I should never have left you or looked away. I'm so sorry that this happened to you. It's all my fault."

I blinked slowly as I took in this unexpected information,
"You... you were still looking out for me, even though I said all those things?"

"Of course I was. Even though I was mad it doesn't mean I love you any less Mads. I'll always look out for you," he reached to give what I knew was intended to be just a gentle, comforting, soft squeeze of my arm.

I jerked backed as the unsavoury recollection of those other hands flashed through my mind.
"Sorry." I mumbled, "I just..."

Jasper backed up, giving me some space,
"No, it's okay, don't apologise. I should've thought before I... I'm sorry. Goddess, I'm so sorry Mads. I should have known something was wrong sooner. No matter how much of a light weight you are, two shots of Amarula on the rocks may make you a bit tipsy, but don't make you that drunk. I should have suspected that guy was up to something but he seemed so..."

"Friendly? Suave? Trustworthy?" I suggested dryly.

"Exactly!" He groaned, "I don't know how he fooled me so well. Normally I'm so good at getting an accurate read on people."

"I know," I sighed, hesitating before adding, "Well, I tell you what it was - how he fooled both of us."

"What? How?"

"Moonlace."

Jasper paled, "Are you sure?"

I slowly nodded, wincing at the pounding it caused my head,
"Positive. It was in his cologne."

He swore.

"My thoughts exactly." I tried to do my signature half-smile but the feeling, once so familiar, now felt foreign to me, and it fell flat. "He... that's not all."

Jasper didn't answer, but tilted his head for me to go on.

"He had Silver, Jasper." His head snapped up and he listened to me intently as I continued, "I thought it was coincidence initally, but then he knew about biting the tongue to ground myself. He knows. He knew how to manipulate it to... to..." I trailed off as a sob choked me.

"To control you." Jasper finished grimly, clenching his fist. "Goddess, it all makes sense now! I was so confused when you- when he- it- argh!" He looked spewing mad, and for a moment I thought he might march off to confront the piece of poops, but then he reigned himself in at the sight of my pale, tear-stained face.

Jasper moved as though to comfort me, by instinct, but then drew back again, instead running his outstretched hand through his hair,
"Goddess. I'm so sorry Maddie. I'm so sorry he put you through that, that he-" struck by a thought, he turned to me, "please tell me he didn't-" he cut himself off, but not before betraying the question in his voice.

I swallowed hard, feeling like just crumpling to the ground and screaming and sobbing and throwing up after what the hell had just happened to me. But, eventually. I mustered up the strength to quietly say,
"No. He... didn't get that far... almost. But- you interrupted before he could- could-" my voice gave way to a strangled shriek as my lungs ceased to work.

I couldn't breathe. I needed to get some fresh air. I needed to hide. I wanted Jasper to hug me and hold me and tell me everything would be alright, but I also felt like throwing up at the mere thought of anyone touching me again. Even someone I loved and trusted. Goddess, I felt like I needed to scrub all my skin off, but even then would the feel of those foul hands ever fade away?

I began hyperventilating, my breaths becoming ragged gasps.

"Shh, it's okay, you're safe now," Jasper said in that gentle way of his, in the same way as he had spoken when he'd rescued me from the bear trap, the day we first met. He moved to hug me and soothingly pat my back as a force of habit, but then stepped back again, mindful of how I was feeling.

But it wasn't okay. I wasn't safe. I'd never feel safe again. As the reality of what had actually happened began to sink in, I got my wish.

My gag reflex finally kicked in, and the vomit came pouring out of me, and even when there was nothing left to throw up I continued to cough and splutter, dry heaving until it felt like my insides were going to come out.

No, I would never feel safe again.
I had entered that bar confident, comfortable, and clean. But now...

That man. What he had done to me, what he had nearly done to me.

It wasn't just my skin that had been nicked, he had cut into my confidence. I now felt as small and tiny and insignificant and weak as a mouse. In my comfy, casual (and once-modest) T-shirt and jeans, I now felt as vulnerable and exposed as if I was wearing nothing more than my bra and underwear. And ever since his eyes had first taken me in after that storage door shut, ever since his foul hands had come into contact with my skin, had roamed where they had no business to be, I felt completely and utterly filthy. I felt defiled and unclean to the very bone, and no amount of soap, no number of showers, no amount of scrubbing, would ever make me feel clean again.

* * *

Sexual assault occurs hundreds of thousands times every year. A UN statistical report from 65+ countries showed that more than 250,000 cases of rape or attempted rape were recorded by police annually.
So many victims, and they are affected far beyond what happens in that moment. It robs them of their confidence, trust, feeling of safety, and so, so much more. Something that might take mere minutes can end up scarring them for months, years, or sometimes even the rest of their life.
I wrote this story because I wanted to use it as a tool to raise awareness of how much Sexual Assault can affect people other than the obvious effects, and how, though I've tried my best to do it justice, no amount of fiction will ever compare to what the terrifying reality is really like. Sexual assault can happen to anyone, at anytime, and anyplace. Though I set it in the stereotypical bar setting with a spiked drink, there are so many other variations of how it can occur. So many stories left untold by people too scared, or shocked, or ashamed. So, my hope is that this story serves to give those people a voice.
Thank you for reading.