EyrieClan:

In BoringClan, no one can think of anything to do until Shrillpaw gets a sugar high and wants to play tag. Because no one has any responsibilities like a real clan, all the cats and even the leader indulge the overgrown kit and play tag.

Suddenly, an earthquake starts an avalanche towards Shrillpaw and his sister Dahliapaw, which is too close to Dariapaw for comfort. Unfortunately, Hollybreeze pushes them out of the way and is trapped in their place, which is the last impactful thing she will do in this story. Hollybreeze is rescued by the rest of the cats, who wonder if StarClan is angry at them instead of, I don't know, moving out of the earthquake zone.

You can expect to find riveting conversations like this happening in EyrieClan:

Stormclaw padded to her brother Lightingtail. "How's life?" she asked.

"It's alright," Lightingtail replied.

"What a riveting conversation," said Eyriestar. "Mind if I join in?"

DuneClan:

In LClan, Sandyflight the enby is grumpy. They are grumpy because everyone, even their creator constantly misgenders them as a girl. In their grumpiness, they invite Tinywing, their apprentice and his mother Hope, a treacherous spy who gets surprisingly little attention considering they're behind a widespread infiltration of the clans, to collect Alder bark at the GroveClan border. There Hope meets her old friend Wolf who almost blows her cover before she saves the day with some mad improve skills. Wolf moonwalks out of there and they return to camp.

Sunscar, Nightflame and Sandsky, who you will definitely get confused with Sandyflight, go on a patrol to the landbridge. On the way there, Sunscar is worried about GroveClan so Sandsky gives him a pep talk which ends in Sunscar fatshaming GroveClan. StarClan has a zero tolerance policy for bigotry, so the patrol gets caught in an earthquake which for some reason starts a sandstorm on the beach.

They survive, then have a passive-aggressive conversation with Grovestar that makes her even more salty than usual. The three come onto a landbridge and see that the ocean is pulled back for miles leaving a bunch of fish flopping on the sand. Instead of getting the h*ll out of there, they decide to catch fish. When the big tidal wave arrives soon after, they survive due to the magic of plot armour.

Back at camp, the earthquake causes a massive dune to nearly crush two apprentices because the creator of this game is very creative. They save them, but then they smell GroveClan because those cats never use deodorant and they decide to evacuate. Unfortunately for them, SmellyClan is right on their heels. After a really one-sided battle, DuneClan collectively cat-shrugs and says, "fine, take our crummy territory."

Here we showcase Hope's acting talents, because damn:

"Hope, long time no see!" called a powerful voice. Out of the undergrowth emerged a muscular grey and white tom. "Don't you recognize your old pal Wolf?" Sandyflight hissed and put themselves between him and their apprentice.

Hope signaled to Wolf that she was still safe, then turned and pretended to face the big tom, fluffing her fur and standing in front of the medicine cats."I can see I'm outnumbered, guess I'll retreat," said Wolf in a monotone then disappeared back into the bushes.

"Yeah you'd better!" Hope hissed, hoping she looked convincing. She knew Tinywing wouldn't be a problem, but his mentor just HAD to be there too!

GroveClan:

In DramaClan, Grovestar is mad. So mad she calls a clan meeting and announces that she wants to do a Brokenstar and drive out another clan. Everyone in GroveClan is pretty enthusiastic about this. She has her deputy/medicine cat/wannabee queen/retired kpop star Breezewing train the apprentices for the pointless attack. Rosepaw and Minnowpaw both suck at fighting, but Rosepaw is sassy and endearing, whereas Minnowpaw is a whiny bully that annoyed the creator and got yeeted into a fox's mouth 13 Chapters later.

Suddenly an earthquake strikes GroveClan. It knocks over a few trees and destroys the camp, including almost crushing Meadowpaw with a giant tree because yep I'm still recycling that plot point. Breezewing is also a forest ranger, and saves Meadowpaw. Rosepaw swears that she'll owe Breezewing forever, only to forget a few chapters later along with the creator. Everyone is sad that their camp looks even more deforested than the Amazon Rainforest.

After the magic of the timeskip, Grovestar calls another clan meeting (Grove meeting count 2) and demands everyone attack DuneClan. They all agree but when they find DuneClan camp empty, they go all the way to Painted Rocks to have a fight. They easily win because DuneClan is puny and half of them were away, and Grovestar makes the wonderful decision to send half her clan to live in the desert with no training on how to survive there.

Grovestar calls another clan meeting (Grove meeting count 3) so everyone can say their goodbyes to their family that's leaving a nice forest to live in the terrible desert/beach. No sooner has half the clan left than The Children of the Ember play the Uno-Reverse card on Grovestar and attack her camp. Firestrike gets mad at Fox for killing his mentor Sagepool, a fact which is bizarrely never mentioned again in the story. Because she's a petty... female dog, Fox blinds him in one eye so he can be more like Jaystrike.

The Children run off, and danger-prone Meadowpaw does a Leroy Jenkins and runs after them. Rosepaw races after her. Grovestar calls yet another clan meeting (Grove meeting count 4) because she just can't help herself. She sends five cats including herself to chase after Rosepaw, turning this serious moment into a Scooby-Doo style chase sequence.

Now let's see what passes for an insult in GroveClan:

An empty camp, dens half demolished by falling sand greeted them. A few sandy pieces of prey and abandoned herb stores were the only things of value in the sandy waste. "Well this is disappointing," complained Rosepaw, "I was hoping to fight someone!"

Grovestar sniffed the air. "You're right, it's abandoned." She sniffed the trail. "It's stale, but I think they went towards the Painted Rocks, come on!" She led her clan towards the Painted Rocks. Dewpaw raced after them.

"Yay, we still might get to fight!" yowled Rosepaw. "I bet I'll take down more DuneClan cats than you," she boasted to her brother Gorsepaw, who snorted in response.

Dewpaw rolled his eyes. "I can't wait to see those skinny cats' fear!"

The Children:

Fox and Owl hung out with some other cats who are totally not in a cult. They grumble about the clans, and convince Dalilah and Finch to help them out because they have nothing better to do. There's an earthquake, and Fox saves Owl from the collapsing trees by dragging him into a cave. She has a flirty moment with him, which is kinda gross considering Owl and her call each other Brother and Sister(cult rules.)

Anyway, the four cats plus Fox's brother Wolf do a raid on GroveClan. When things predictably go south, they run away like little cowards, but then they catch little Meadowpaw who was dumb enough to chase them. After an acolyte named Rose aperates into existence beside them, they have a torture brainstorming session that ends when Grovestar discovers them. For the crime of being stupid and not getting killed off when the creator tried the first time, Meadowpaw gets killed by Fox in a very lame way, being tossed on a sharp rock.

After killing Meadowpaw, The Children call "See ya, nerds!" and leave. Grovestar kills Fox's brother Wolf to make things fair and square. Rosepaw is traumatized, so traumatized she barely cares when Rose tries to be spooky.

For this selection, we present Fox taking a page out of the camp villains playbook:

Grovestar hissed in annoyance. "Give us Meadowpaw and Rosepaw back!"

Rosepaw raced over to her leader, finally catching up with the rogues. "Grovestar wha-"

Fox smirked at Grovestar. "Very poor choice of words." She grabbed the quivering apprentice by the scruff of her neck and tossed her hard into a sharp rock that lay at Grovestar's feet. "You never said to give her back alive." Rosepaw screamed in horror and raced over to her friend as the rogues fled in different directions.