chapter three

i threw glass at my friends' eyes and now i'm on probation

It was the day from hell.

Everything kicked off when I fell down the stairs on my way to my accounting class, followed by a balance sheet that wouldn't bloody balance an headed up by a locker that wouldn't open, a few minor inconveniences scattered in between.

It was awful, and still weighing on me hours later. I'm not like other people, I can't let things go. All I could think about that morning was how many people must have seen me miss those last two stairs.

We were sitting in Yui's bedroom ,styrofoam takeout boxes from the diner that her boyfriend worked at in Torau City scattered around us. Yui's laptop was sitting on the floor, playing Takayuki Yamada's "Fifty First Kisses", a remake of an American romantic comedy starring Adam Sandler.

"This movie is so mushy I think I might be sick." Madoka laughed, shoveling a forkful of french fries into her mouth.

"I don't know," I remarked, replying quickly to a text my mother sent regarding how my day went- glossing over the details, obviously. "after the day I've had, it's kind of nice."

Yui shrugged her shoulders. "I think it's cute. I can only hope that if I lost all my memories every day like that, that Sawamura would even be half a nice as this fucker."

Madoka snorted. "Are you kidding? Shinya wouldn't. It would be like that scene where he's trying to talk to her in the restaurant and they make the damn pancake house, but every single day."

It was times like these that I felt perpetually excluded from the conversation. Yui had been dating Shoji Sawamura for just under six months, and Madoka had been with Shinya Orochi for coming up on seven. And I was still alone, and after the Takahide Sena disaster, I was ready to give up on finding love in Oya. I had officially sworn off Hope Hills boys for good.

I went quiet as Yui and Madoka continued their chatter, picking at my hamburger and pretending everything was fine, and for the most part, it was. Despite the small ache in my soul, I was happy that my best friends had found people to share their lives with.

"Sakura, are you okay? You're kind of quiet." Yui said softly, reaching to put a hand on my shoulder

"It's just that. . ." I trailed off, wondering how much was a good idea to say. I didn't want to come across as jealous or unhappy that I was still single, even though I could be, at times. "Yui, you have Sawamura. Madoka has Shinya. I've got nobody."

Madoka's expression softened. "What about Yasushi?"

I choked back a laugh, the entire thing coming out more as a snort. "God no, that would be like making out with my brother!"

"You'll always have us, Kiri." Yui reassured, pulling me in for a side hug as I felt the tears begin to come on. Yui and Madoka really were the best friends I could ask for.

Madoka rolled her eyes. "Oh come on, you big saps. Let me get in here." She said before leaning over and completing the group hug. 

I had never felt such a sense of belonging and security, and warmth than when I spent time with Madoka and Yui. It scared me that we were all off to college in eight months, unlikely to see each other ever again.

"Yo!" A deep, baritone voice shouts, followed closely by the sound of Yui's bedroom door rolling open. "Madoka, your grandmother is here." Leaning in the doorway, dressed in pristine, unstained white from head to toe, was Yui's older brother, Sachio. The leader of Housen Academy, Sachio Ueda's imposing appearance unsettled  many except those who knew him best. "Sakura, let me drive you home. You shouldn't be walking around Hope Hills alone once the sun begins to set."

Begrudgingly, I packed up my takeout container, shoving the leftover food in my backpack as I prepared to leave. Madoka followed my lead, none of us anxious to leave Yui's and go back to the cesspool we called home. 

Madoka's father was the maintenance man, and the Ishii's lived in a small house not built for a family the size of thiers, a five minute walk from the Ghost Block. She was far enough away from the apartments that she could safely say she no longer lived in Hope Hills, but Madoka owned where she came from; she was proud to have grown up in the Ghost Block.

 I wasn't. For as long as I could remember, I wanted out of Hope Hills.

I slung my Kanken backpack over my shoulder, giving Yui a tight, friendly hug. "See you tomorrow. Love you!"

"Love you, too!" Yui shouted back as I waved to Madoka, following Sachio out of the house.

Sachio and Yui's father had been a homicide detective in Torau City. Last summer, he was shot during a raid on a serial killer's apartment, and the family had fractured at the loss. Yui became more irresponsible, at one point falling briefly in with the drug faction Kidra. Sachio threw himself into Housen, drowning his anger in his studies and his fights.

We drove in silence, and I thought it was better that way. Even though I'd known the twenty-three year old since my freshman year at Seiho, it was still often flat-out awkward when Sachio and I were left alone. It was almost as if he had no idea how to interact with his sister's friends.

When Sachio stopped the old Hyundai outside of the gates to the Murder Tower, gates which once read 'Welcome to Hope Hills' but now simply stated the obvious: Welcome To Hell, he turned to face me. "Be careful, kid. I know Kidra has been mostly radio silent, but you should always keep one eye in the back of your head. The Murder Tower isn't safe. Call me if you need anything."

"Thanks, Satchi." I mumbled, grabbing my bags and my denim jacket, getting out of the car as slowly as I could. I knew my mother was home, one of the rare weeknights we'd get to spend together, but the weight of the day was still heavy on my shoulders, and I worried I'd blow up at her for no reason at all.

Walking through Hope Hills at night was generally unsafe for anybody, let alone a teenage girl. When Kidra were at the height of their reign of terror,  I never even left the apartment. If I had to go anywhere, I brought Madoka with me. It was bad enough that Kidra had tried to kill one of my best friends, they had stolen another from me. Arata Maekawa. When we were little, we had both gone through group therapy together in an attempt to break down the social anxiety barriers we both had. When he dropped of the radar last summer, I knew it could only have meant one thing. He'd been backed into a corner, forced to join Kidra like so many Hope Hills teenagers in need of cash.

But the Kanehiras would never hurt a Kobayashi. Not after what my mother did for them. How she saved the brothers after that crash. It should have been reassuring, a badge of Murder Tower honor, but it just made me feel sick. I didn't want to have that kind of immunity. The immunity that would make everybody else look at me strangely.

The courtyard was shockingly empty for eight o'clock in the evening. Usually all the YasuKiyo kids would be out doing something, sometimes the Sato boys could be seen playing basketball.  I guess Beer Pong Night was the be all and end all of Oyakou entertainment.

I slipped the small, silver key into the lock on my front door, jamming my shoulder into the metal in an attempt to leverage it open. The door creaked as I opened it, calling out to let my mother know I was home as I placed my bags on the couch.

"Mom?" I called again, confused at why she hadn't already come to greet me. We rarely ever got time to spend together with her busy schedule, so I had no idea where she could be.

I called out again, worry seeping into my bones. Where the hell could she be? I strained my ears, trying to pick up any possible sound that I could. There was a faint whining sound coming from the bigger bedroom, and it turned my blood to ice.

What if the Kanehiras went back on their words? What if the dangers of Hope Hills had finally reached my family?

"Mom!" I shouted this time, rushing towards the white wooden door and throwing it open. "Mom, is everything-"

I stopped in my tracks. My mother was fine. If by fine you mean naked in bed with Seki Kotaro.

"Jesus, Sakura!" My mom said, scrambling to cover her body with the sheets. "I thought you were at Yui's!"

"Her brother just dropped me off. What the hell?" I was fuming.  Not even waiting for an answer, I took off.

I barely got any time to spend with mom because of her schedule, and on her one night off, on the worst day I've had in a really long time, she decides that getting laid is more important than spending quality time with her daughter? I was so furious that I ignored every logical voice in my brain, storming out into Hope Hills as the sun dipped behind the clouds for the last time. I stomped across the outdoor hallway, so angry that even the rattling of the rickety metal stairs wasn't enough to make me stop and think.

Looking back, maybe I should have stopped to think. But I probably wouldn't have been very happy with the way that my life went from there onwards.

I was now at the main level of the complex, where the bigger units were. Last summer, one of the biggest units in the murder tower had been turned into Kidra's drug lab, but after the fight against Oya, they cleared it out. The corner lot was still empty. Nobody dared to go near it.

One of the Murder Tower's oldest residents was Mr. Kubota. Nobody knew his first name. Nobody actually knew anything about him at all.  He had been a very important man on the underground yakuza scene back in the late seventies, when organized crime groups were bolder, had more cops on their payroll. When his organization busted up, he went into hiding, started a new life. And then he showed up here. I'm not sure if any of those stories are true, the things that the residents say about him, but that tattoos on his arms and back have to prove something.

His corner lot is surrounded by a small vegetable garden. Tending to it is just about all that the old man does any more. His entire front porch is surrounded by a legion of Dutch garden gnomes. Gnomes with patronizing, smiling faces and stupid, pointy hats.

"What are you looking at?" I growled at a gnome with a bright yellow hat and floral coveralls. I don't know why I expected the inanimate object to respond, turns it's head away. But everything I had experienced that day was spiralling out of control. 

At my breaking point, I lashed out and kicked the garden gnome, punting it into the Murder Tower's grey brick wall. When it didn't break, that only made me angrier.

"You cheap bastard." I knelt down, picking up the garden gnome. It was hollow, made of a squishy plastic. "They're fucking imitation." I screamed, the stress of the entire day bearing down on me as I threw the plastic gnome at the window, the hollow object clattering inconsequentially to the ground.

At the end of my rope, I stomped on the gnome, feeling a little bit of joy when the plastic gave way under my foot. I didn't actually feel too much better, but at least something in my emotions changed. 

The front door to Mr. Kubota's opened behind me, a middle aged man sticking his head out of the door. "Hey!" He shouted. I recognized the guy, he was Mr. Kubota's son, his only surviving relative. "That's vandalism. I've called the cops! You'be be right to leave, young lady."

That fucking did it. I spun around, not even realizing that I was doing it, and punched Mr. Kubota's son in the nose. The bone shattered underneath my fist, blood gushing and spilling onto my knuckles.

"Motherfucker!" He shouted, and I took a step back as I realized what I had done.

Terrified that his nose was broken, I turned and started to run. I didn't get very far before a pair of arms stopped me in my tracks, pinning my arms to my sides and lifting me off the ground. "Let me go, you wanker!"

I thrashed around in my attackers arms, my worst nightmares about Hope Hills coming true.

"Sakura, calm down! It's me, it's Shinya."

Shinya Orochi's voice didn't do much to calm me down, but at least I stopped clawing at his arms. I felt a little bit bad. "Put me. The fuck. Down. Shinya." I said shortly, enunciate every word. "Or so help me, God."

"Christ." Shinya hissed, letting me go. Once I was back on solid ground, I turned around and shoved him in the chest.

"What are you doing here?" I spat, crossing my arms over my chest. "You don't live here anymore, Orochi."

Shinya rolled his eyes, the moonlight shining off the red tips of his dark hair"Fujio's mom needed help with something, God. I thought I'd go and see Madoka-chan, too, but she's gone."

"Her grandmother took her out somewhere. Why did you get involved? I can sort out my own shit."

"No you can't, Sakura!" He shouted. "You know what's going to happen to you? Do you really understand? You're going to turn out like Hyuga Norihisa, and you can't come back from that."

All of the anger left my body, and I stood there breathing heavily, fighting tears. Everybody knew about the infamous leader of Daruma Ikka, the only SWORD leader with a criminal record. "Take that back, Shinya. I'm nothing like him."

"Well, you're sure acting like him right about now."

I was choosing my words carefully, poised to shout when the complex was bathed in red and blue light.

"This is the Hope Hills Security Department, and you are under arrest. Put your hands in the air, and step away from the garden gnomes!"

NOTES!

sakura has got some issues, but it's okay, shes gonna sort those out.