Q: What was the inspiration for this story.

A. Um... depression 😂 I mainly wanted to focus on how Yoongi was obviously depressed because he wasn't able to grieve and I take that as a a bad habit of mine. I've lost a lot of people in my life and I usually go "oh another one bites the dust" and then months later i ACTUALLY grieve and lash out. Another part of me is in Jimin. I have good days in which I love myself bare face and others where I refuse to go out without make up. A lot of his insecurities came from his mothers need to be a perfect child and that comes from my dad wanting me to be the perfect daughter despite that he wasnt a perfect dad. Honestly, this is just all of my insecurities portrayed by each character BIG yIKES
author fact: i use to be a very depressed person!

Q. There was obviously a much bigger plan for this or different idea. What was the original plan?

A. Haha so funny um i never wrote an alternate ending of the main idea but like... I hated love last year when I started this and was depressed and I was like "nah yoongi gonna off himself" and then i got in a relationship in which i learned to speak my feelings and grow confident despite the fact that we both had our own problems going on so i realized... "huh... you CAN get better through other's love and care" author fact: i love my boyfriend uwu dont even get me started i love that man so mu—

Q. I like Suran, why make her such a bitch?

A. Lmao i dont know of any other girl that has been accused of dating Yoongi so—i dont ever keep up with the toxic fandom's speculations, any person portrayed as evil in my fics has NOTHING to do with my personal opinion in them. I personally hate making certain idols act "wrong" which says a lot about a fic ive been writing for a year now and I feel bad making Jackson a complete dick 😂
author fact: my ult has been jackson since 2017

Q. What would have happened had Hoseok and Jin gotten together?

A. Nothing, I never planned that to happen. Thats a lie, sort of—I wanted it to be a readers choice but then realized "i dont have enough followers or readers for that." But I knew no one would actually vote for them because they're an underrated ship too. I guess, thinking about it now, I would have dived deeper on Hoseok's insecurity with being left out with his friends and Jin's self discovery.
author fact: im bi, despite the fact that im in a straight relationship

Q. What even was going on with Jungkook's past and his reluctance to dating?

A. I wanted to squeeze this in at the end but ultimately decided not to add it because I realized I usually dont care for other's details in their pasts and thats okay. The idea was there—that Jungkook had trust issues and would slowly overcome them but I realized the main couple was Yoonmin, not Taekook and showing too much of their relationship would make the readers lose focus and forget the overall message that was actually about mental illness, not about trust issues or toxic relationships. Plus, adding another toxic ex felt repetitive.
author fact: i mostly just wanted to portray my toxic exes and decided that being petty wouldn't ruin their lives, karma would

Q. Are there other alternate endings?

A. I actually did have an idea where the two wouldnt end up together that didnt involve suicide 🤷🏻‍♀️ I know that sounds weird but it would basically be this bittersweet ending where Yoongi would focus on himself and promise Jimin he'd better himself for Jimin and the story would end with Jimin promising to wait until he was mentally stable. I'm a dickHEAD writer and would add a little easter egg that could mean many things which could have meant
1) Yoongi was actually just gonna commit anyways but it's obviously left for speculation
2) Jimin might have been fake and a figment of Yoongi's fucked imagination and there was a more underlined mental illness in which his grief caused him to hallucinate to cope OR
3) Jimin was already dating someone else and Yoongi misinterpreted his kindness for something else. I know— I'm just... awful and would have been a great ending for maybe a shorter more fast paced fanfic OR JUST ANGST...might keep that in mind...*takes note for future fanfic*
author fact: i read this yoonmin fanfic a fucking while ago where jimin was delusional and imagined his dead ex —taehyung—coming back and the fanfic ends with yoongi preventing him from killing himself and i remember thinking it was such a piece of art and an AMAZING story and ... i cant find it again. i think the author deleted it and that makes me sad.

Q. What was the point of the shooting chapter?

A. I hate to admit it but it was mostly because I needed the plot to advance and I didn't wanna be cliche and have them just go on a double date after I had set this up (unfortunately i would write this as I published it. as a writer, i dont endorse this i yell at my irl friend when she does it, please finish writing a story before publishing even if you have tons of chapters written) But it worked out well with Yoongi overcoming his anxiety, Namjoon's leader skills showing, Jimin's confession, and Taehyung's vulnerability.
author fact: i survived a shooting! several if we count the daily shoot outs in puerto rico!

Q. Gaming...?

A. ... Yes so... I like game development and at the time I was interested in it and I actually planned a lot of major events to surround gaming like, Yoongi's and Jimin's confession would actually be through a video game but then um... me and my boyfriend ended up doing that UNIRONICALLY AND UNINTENTIONALLY AND I WAS LIKE "i cant just ;!'sksks throw that in a fanfic!!!" his ass you would clown me and call me "jimin head ass" cause he reads my works so
author fact: i wanna develop a horror game with my boyfriend but i dont think he's very interested in the idea 😔 also his fave bts songs are louder than bombs and singularity—a man with taste

Q. What are all of their sexualities?

A. Jin, queer.
Namjoon? Gay
Jimin? Gay with extra gay
Hoseok? Surprisingly, bi curious, nothing set yet. The idea was that if this was readers choice, Hoseok would also be discovering his sexuality and if he didnt end up with Jin, it'd be because he'd realize he was straight cause jesus, every boy CANT BE GAY.
Jungkook...
Jungkook...
Jungkook, in most of my fanfics, is one of the most vague characters when it comes to sexuality. He's one of those people that you're like "huh... he COULD be buuuuut." so... 🤷🏻‍♀️ who cares, better left a mystery. im actually pretty sure theres a chappie where he says it but like canonically, lets be honest—Mystery.
Taehyung? Jungkooksexual. Fun fact, I actually wanted to make Taehyung asexual and the two have an asexual relationship but I didnt wanna seem insensitive because I know every asexual is different and I didnt want people to be angry cause I might be misinformed. So... Jungkooksexual.
Yoongi, bisexual icon.
author fact: all of my friends are part of the lgbt except for two, one of them being my boyfriend. weird aint it? then again i got like three friends

Q. Will there be a spinoff book?

A. Yes and no. I have this weird planner were some of my stories—depending on the focus of the story—are connected. So like my Astro fanfic about them having powers will be in the same universe as an Nct as angels and demons—wack, I know. So, yes, but not with bts. You know how Minhyuk and his boyfriend Shownu move away at the end of the book? 👀 Yeah I have already covered all the bts ships here so the only "Spin off" coming out with be a VERY short book on Namjoon and Jin as house-husbands... maybe. I dont wanna milk this story just for clout unless the readers want it.

Q. Why did it take so long to end this book?

A. 1) I saw this fanfic as a flop at first, 2) I was majorly depressed for a long time after two relationships failed for me in a short amount of time 3) I had no motivation 4) Writer's block 5) As I stated before, I was writing this as I published it 6) I didn't think anyone cared and 🥺 turns out I was wrong
author fact: when this fanfic started getting a thousand reads a week and comments, i cried from happiness. thank you.

Q. Do you have other BTS fanfics?

A. YES I DO AND I DO A LOT OF RESEARCH AND POUR MY HEART AND SOUL INTO THEM SO
First and Last (A jikook gang/soulmate au)
Ethically Wrong (... idk what their ship name is... namin?jijoon?joonmin?namjoon and jimin in which joon is a professor of ethics and jimin is a film major) side note: i spent weeks researching ethics and film for this fic please read it 🥺
I do want to write a vhope fanfiction so you can look forward to that 👉🏻👈🏻
author fact: my fave ship is actually jin and taehyung but if i were to write a fanfic of them it would be very mature and uh... i dont wanna go there as a writer who has a lot of minors as readers

Q. Other Kpop Fanfics?

A. Hold my beer—I mean, I don't drink hold my apple juice—

Snow Hills (Astro Sanha fic) very very proud of this one even an irl friend read this and told me she cRIED
Lost Boys (Astro Fic in which they got pOwErS!)
The Trainee (Astro JinJin fic) also one of my most reads (please dont read my fnaf fics, we dont talk about those)
Got7's Model (GOT7 fic) currently editing but i will be finishing it up soon!
this made me realize that i write a lot with astro despite the fact that they're not even my ult group—author fact: monsta x and got7 are my ults! ive seen got7 and nct live and bambam and i dabbed at each other

Side note: Once I finish the GOT7 one and an original I'm publishing, I plan on posting other ones, like an NCT one which is from Taeyong's pov, a social media au of Monsta X, and maybe more 👀

A big shout out to
@-LEEKNOWS
lolilostmywig
the_planet_is_dying and every reader who commented and voted on this story.

N A M J I N & H O B I CHAPTER SOON