(I'm gonna put a sugary food at the beginning of each chapter because I can)

(Oh PS Bakugou and Midoriya are on good terms in this story)

(PPS listening to the song at the top while writing this lol-)

🍭🍭🍭

Bakugou groaned as his green-haired "friend" tried to coax him into signing up for a Sugar Daddy website.

"Kacchan, it worked out for me! You should at least give it a shot.."

"I'm not signing up to be a sex toy. I'm not that fucking desperate."

"Well, I found a good Sugar Daddy that doesn't treat me like a sex toy. Maybe you could find someone like him!"

"There's a 0.2% chance of that happening, Deku. I'm not doing it."

Midoriya groaned, trying to think of some way to make him agree. An idea popped into his head and he smirked.

"Are you... scared, Kacchan~?" He asked teasingly, his eyebrows raised and a smug look on his face.

"I'm not fucking scared, shitty nerd! I just don't need someone to look after me, unlike you."

"But Kacchan, you do need someone. I still have my family to help me. You don't. Just do it, it'll work out, I swear."

Bakugou growled and glared at his phone screen, where the website was pulled up.

"If this goes wrong, I'm going to strangle you and that half and half bastard until your faces explode."

"Deal!"

🍭🍭🍭

"Uh, Kacchan? That's a pretty... terrible name.. here, let me-"

Midoriya quickly snatched the device, changing the name, "Lord Explosion Murder" to "Ground Zero~".

"What the fuck did you do that for?!" Bakugou hissed, trying to take the phone back.

"Because with that name, no one will offer to take you! You need something more subtle."

Bakugou just grumbled and let Midoriya take over.

"Okay, you have to answer some questions. What's your favorite pastime?"

"Beating up nerds like you."

Midoriya nodded and typed in, "Going to the gym."

"Next question. Favorite food?"

"Anything spicy."

"Favorite color?"

"Orange."

"Why did you sign up?"

Bakugou glared at Midoriya.

"Okay, okay. That wasn't a question. Anyway, how old are you?"

"19. Turning 20 in a few months."

"Gender?"

"Male."

"Gender preference?"

"Male."

"Sexuality?"

"Gay as fuck."

"And lastly, where do you live?"

"Musutafu, Japan."

Midoriya quickly typed that in, then pressed confirm. He quickly scrolled through Bakugou's gallery, choosing the photo that was the least violent for his profile picture.

He handed the phone back to Bakugou after everything was set up and ready.

"There you go! Now just wait until-"

P i n g

🍭🍭🍭

YAY

Okay

I'm ready for this shit-