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𝗥𝗜𝗦𝗞

CHAPTER ELEVEN
said I'm fine, but it wasn't true
— I don't want to keep secrets
just to keep you

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IMESSAGE GROUP CHAT

the gworls
mj [ mary jane ]
luna [ luna ]
rae [ rae ]
miyoung [ miyoung ]
leslie [ leslie ]
tina [ tina ]

rae
okay
what the fuck
is up

tina
oh

leslie
HI GWORLS :D

luna
omg hey guys
what's this group
chat for

rae
girl talk
MJ
WHERE ARE
YOU

mj
I'm here I'm
here hello
what's going on

rae
YOU
YOU'RE WHAT'S
GOING ON

mj
?

luna
ooooh mj what
did you do

tina
ohhhh I'm seeing
what this is about

miyoung
yeah rae's been
going feral over
this for hours

leslie
OHHHHH right
hehehehehe

mj
anybody else
lost?

rae
mary jane.
what happened
between you and
ellum last night?
in fact, what's BEEN
happening between
you and ellum?

luna
SOMETHING
HAPPENED BETWEEN
YOU AND ELLUM
LAST NIGHT?????
AND I DIDN'T HEAR
ABOUT IT?????

mj
because nothing
happened?

rae
BULLSHIT.
mj.
he looked so fucking
sad when you said you
we're going home.
he followed after
you when you left
on his own accord.
and you haven't come
out of your room all
day.

leslie
^

tina
mj, you can talk
to us 🫶🏻
we're all here to
listen!!!!!

mj
um
well

miyoung
pausechamp

luna
idk what happened
last night but I can
tell you what's been
happening in one
sentence

tina
and what's that

luna
mj wants to climb
ellum like a tree

mj
EXCUSEEEEE ME

luna
I DIDN'T LIE?????

rae
OH I FUCKING
KNEW IT

miyoung
cmon mj don't
deny it

leslie
MJ HAS A CRUSH
ON ELLUM!!!!!

luna
somebody play
falling for ya from
teen beach movie

mj
oh jesus fucking
christ

tina
mj?

mj
hold on give me
a second

luna
take your time
queen
gather your
thoughts
so from an
outsider perspective
what went down

rae
they were being
all giggly with
each other last
night until something
happened
idk what went
wrong but mj went
to the bathroom
and came back
saying she didn't
feel good
she told all of us
she would be fine
going back home
on her own but
ellum stared at
her like a lovesick
puppy
he said nothing
and followed after
her and they went
home together
what happened
after that I don't
know

leslie
plus the other
night he went
outside and
talked to her
and was able
to get her to
come inside
and then MADE
HER TEA?????
HE MAKES NO
ONE TEA BUT
HIMSELF

miyoung
I've seen the way
they've been looking
at each other
the eyes never lie
let me tell you what

tina
yeah ngl there's
been a sort of
vibe between
them ever since
they met
they both get so
so shy around
each other it's
kind of cute

luna
okay it's deeper
than I thought it
was
well mj
got anything to
say about this

mj

tina
MARY JANE???????

rae
SO SHE ADMITS
IT
I KNEW IT
I FUCKING KNEW
ITTTTTTTT

luna
like I said
wants to climb
him like a tree

mj
I'm losing my
mind I fear

rae
okay
you know
what
meeting right
now
it's intervention
time
besties let's meet
in mj's room right
now

miyoung
👍🏻

leslie
ON MY WAY!!!!!

tina
yay girl talk! :D

luna
yeah I'll be
right there

leslie
oh lunes we
miss you!!!

mj
guys I'm about
to crash out fr

rae
OKAY HURRY

tina
we go! with
haste!

＊*•♥̩͙•̩̩͙*˚˚*•♥̩͙•̩̩͙*˚＊＊*•̩̩͙♥̩͙•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙♥•̩̩͙*˚＊

REAL LIFE

"HERE I AM again, the same old situation. Why does the guy thing have to be so complicated? . . ."

Mary Jane sighed deeply, folding another piece of her clothes and putting it in her suitcase as Sabrina Carpenter played through her headphones. Okay, no, she wasn't going home — even though the thought of that was enticing after whatever the hell she did last night. Noah was meant to be arriving today, which meant Mary Jane was going downstairs and staying in Tina's room so Noah could take her spot in this room. She was just in the midst of cleaning up the mess she made in the room when she got all those texts from the group chat, and now here she was, waiting for all of the girls to show up.

Honestly, maybe it was a good thing she was going to talk about this. Mary Jane was planning on taking everything to her grave and moving on like nothing happened, even though she knew the second she would would see Ellum again she would absolutely fall to pieces as normal when she was around him. Which is exactly why she had locked herself in the room all day, under the notion that she had to clean, even though the real reason was that she didn't want to face him so soon.

Stupid. She knows. Everything about this was fucking dumb.

She was snapped out of her own thoughts by the door opening, which she somehow managed to hear over her music. Mary Jane glanced up to see Rae enter the room first, followed by Leslie, Tina, and Miyoung. She took out her headphones and removed her phone from her back pocket, placing both in a heap on the desk in the room. Miyoung shut the door behind all of them.

"Hey," Mary Jane greeted, dragging out the y, feeling a bit sheepish after that picture she sent in the group chat.

"Okay, spill," Leslie encouraged, setting herself down on the bed and staring up at her expectantly. "Tell us everything! We wanna know."

"But don't feel pressured to tell us anything," Tina was quick to say as she sat down in the streamer chair. "Whatever makes you comfortable, babe. But this is a safe space."

Miyoung looked at her affectionately. "Oh, Tina, you're so cute."

"Guys," Rae cut in, crossing her arms. "I've been planning on trying to have an intervention with Meena about her Blau situation. And I can't believe I have to have an intervention for you, too. Absolute insanity."

Mary Jane pointed at her. "Oh my God, invite me to that intervention."

"Don't change the subject." Rae's eyes softened, her aggression lessening ever so slightly. "MJ, you like Ellum, don't you?"

Mary Jane stared at her for a moment, all of her walls falling around her. "Yeah. An extremely terrible one."

Rae nodded. "Okay. I thought so, but just needed a verbal confirmation."

She blinked. "You thought so?"

"It's so obvious."

Mary Jane felt the sudden need to throw herself off a cliff. "It's obvious?"

"Well, I mean, you haven't been doing too much to hide it. From the way you act around him, it's pretty clear you're down bad."

She tilted her head back, looking at the ceiling. "Fucking hell, I know."

"For how long?" Miyoung asked. "Since when you arrived?"

"No, actually. Um . . ." Mary Jane paused for a second, her cheeks flushing red. "Since April."

"April?" Leslie repeated. "Didn't you guys meet for the first time when you got to LA?"

"Yes, and that's the worst part," Mary Jane answered. "I saw him on Tina's stream, and I was just so gone. Like, I developed a crush I hadn't even met. Talk about parasocial. And then we met, and it's become ten times worse, and I don't know what to do. Like, God, I'm actually invested."

Tina raised her eyebrows. "Okay, Risk."

"Oh, yeah, and that song's about him. Luna taught me that I should write my feelings into songs, and there it is. Once again, parasocial. Writing a song about a guy I never met . . . which, makes sense, actually, if you listen to the lyrics."

Tina's jaw dropped. "You're telling me . . . that one of my favorite songs . . . is about Ellum?!"

Mary Jane shrugged. "Sorry?"

"So what happened last night?" Leslie questioned, tightening her ponytail slightly as she did so. "What's making you hide in here away from him?"

She absentmindedly started to fold another shirt that had been discarded on the floor. "Well, when he joined me outside, he gave me his jacket because I was cold. Then we got in the Uber, and I gave him a headphone, and we listened to music together in the car. When we got home, he offered me his hand, but then we held hands all the way until we were inside. And then . . . and then, I don't know what the fuck came over me, but I kissed his cheek and then went upstairs. It was like I was possessed. So now I'm here, contemplating all my life decisions."

Leslie pouted. "Aw, wait, you guys are so cute. That's adorable."

"Wait, so what do you like about him?" Rae questioned, tilting her head in curiosity. "And I don't mean that in a bad way. He's just so little brother coded to me that I forget other people don't see him that way."

"He's . . . God, what don't I like about him?" Mary Jane responded. "He's like a God damn ray of sunshine. His energy is so contagious — like, he's basically a golden retriever. And he's so so sweet. He's told me numerous times that he likes hanging out with me and enjoys my company. He just . . . he makes me feel wanted. Like I'm important."

Rae raised her eyebrows. "And you find him attractive, I'm assuming?"

Mary Jane rolled her eyes. "Oh God, and he's hot. Six five, British accent, tattoos piercings, muscles, just . . . ugh!" She groaned in complaint, placing a hand on her forehead. "Kill me. Just kill me."

Miyoung scrunched her nose up slightly. "Gross."

Tina hit her shoulder. "Miyoung. Let's be considerate, now."

"Nope, absolutely not," Rae stated. "We're going to make this happen."

"And how exactly are we going to do that?" Mary Jane argued lightly. "Because every time I'm around him, it's like I can't breathe. My mind turns to mush and my stomach gets all weird and I can't say anything besides nonsense. I'm not usually like this, and I don't know how to fix it. This crush feels like it's eating me up. I might explode soon, and who knows what that would end up looking like."

"Well, if you have enough courage to keep holding his hand and kiss his cheek, surely you have courage to do something else."

"You're overestimating my confidence and my abilities, Rae."

"We'll help you," Leslie told her. "You have a group of wing women around you, plus Luna when she comes back from her trip. It'll be great."

"I mean, maybe, but . . ." Mary Jane trailed off, her voice dropping to a softer tone, something way more vulnerable. "What if he doesn't like me back?"

"Oh, so we're delusional," Miyoung stated.

Rae scoffed. "Girl, please."

Tina gave her a look. "MJ, come on."

"Doesn't?" Leslie repeated incredulously. "MJ, that boy cannot take his eyes off of you. He stares at you like you're the only girl in the room. And he gets so incredibly nervous around you — I can tell."

Mary Jane's heart thudded against her chest, even though her mind was screaming at her that it wasn't true. "Does he?"

"He does," Rae confirmed. "Both of you are just tip-toeing around each other. Just . . . I don't know, do something?"

"Fantastic advice. Thank you, Rae."

There was suddenly a knock at the door. Mary Jane looked over at the door, her heart momentarily stopping. Considering practically all of them in the house were in this one room, that only meant it could be one person. The same exact person that Mary Jane had been avoiding all day.

"Come in," Rae said.

Mary Jane turned to look at her. Rae gave her a smirk, her eyes glinting. Mary Jane took a deep breath, resuming on folding the last bit of her clothes. The door opened, and Mary Jane glanced up for a second only to immediately lock eyes with Ellum. She felt her face heat up, the air crackling between them even with everyone else in the room.

"Oh, hey," Ellum greeted, glancing between all of them. "I don't know if I'm missing something, but Foolish is here."

Noah appeared behind him, waving at everyone. "Hello."

Instantly, Rae, Tina, Miyoung, and Leslie burst out in exclamations of glee, all of them moving from their respective spots to go and greet him. Mary Jane hung back for a second, placing the last of her things in her suitcase. Once the last person, which was Tina, finished hugging Noah, Mary Jane went up to him. Noah grinned down at her and extended his arm. Mary Jane instantly sunk into his side, hugging him back — even after everything they've been through, the amount of comfort that came from him was something that wasn't ever going to go away.

"Hey, loser," Mary Jane greeted. "Did you have a good trip?"

"It was fine," Noah responded. "And, hey, why are you calling me a loser when Ellum is standing right there?"

"Because he doesn't piss me off like you do. Oh, Josh, um . . ." She turned around, grabbing his jean jacket that she had draped over the chair — which she had worn last night longer than she'd like to admit. "Here's your jacket, by the way."

"Oh," Ellum voiced, taking his jacket back. "Thanks."

Mary Jane tucked some of her hair behind her ears. "No, thank you for letting me borrow it. And . . . for everything else last night."

"You don't have to thank me."

"But I want to."

The two of them paused, just staring at each other again. To Mary Jane, it felt like the entire world faded around them, including everybody else in the room. She still found it absolutely ridiculous how he always made her feel so paralyzed.

"So, should I go, or . . .?" Noah inquired.

Mary Jane was brought of her trance, shaking her head a bit. "Oh, um, one second, Noah. I just finished cleaning up." She turned back around, squeezing her eyes shut in embarrassment for a second, and trying to ignore all the knowing stares from the girls. Mary Jane then picked up her suitcase. "The room is all yours now."

"MJane," Ellum protested, grabbing onto her arm when she tried to brush past him while leaving. "You okay? You've been up here all day."

Fuck. He noticed.

"Fine," Mary Jane answered, even though she was totally not fine. "Now, if you would excuse me, I'm going to go move into Tina's room . . . you know, if she actually lets me in."

"You're invited in," Tina announced, following after her out of the room. "Just let me move some stuff around. And don't mind my Winnie the Pooh car."

Mary Jane blinked as she walked down the stairs with Tina. "Winnie the Pooh car? You have a Winnie the Pooh car?"

"Yes, and it's awesome." Once they were finally a respectable distance away from the room, Tina grabbed onto her arm and leaned her head closer. "Forget down bad. You're down awful."

She rolled her eyes. "God, tell me about it."

-ˏˋ ✩✩✩ ˊˎ-

wait why are they cruel summer coded

ellum flying into la to surprise leslie for her birthday actually made me violently sob they mean so much to me