The outbreak was over. Everyone was so happy and relieved. You'd think I would be too. And if you'd asked me two weeks ago, I would have said yes. But I didn't have anything to be happy about and no one to share it with. My feet crunched on the dead leaves as I walked on the green grass.

In my hand, I held a single rose. As I kept walking, memories invaded my mind, just to remind me of what I'd lost. And the life I know had to look forward to without that happiness I'd become accustomed to. I looked down at the flower and twisted it between my fingers. Its thorny stem brushed against the palm of my hand as more thoughts came to me.

I had to wake up every day now, knowing that a part of me would always be missing. And knowing that I would never get that part back...

My brown eyes filled with tears once I reached my destination. I stood still as the tears rolled down my cheeks. I didn't even attempt to brush them away, knowing more would follow. I sighed as I kneeled down on the grass. I reached my hand out and placed the rose onto the grave in front of me. I lifted my eyes up to read the name on the headstone once more even though I'd read it a thousand times.

Officer Jake Riley

April 14, 1988 - June 1, 2016

Died from the Virus Outbreak of 2016

Beloved son, husband, and friend

A sob escaped my mouth and I covered it with my hand. He was gone. My whole world was shattered and he was gone. It hurt so bad... What would I do without him? I couldn't go a day without him much less...a lifetime...

More sobs came as I lifted myself up off the ground. Everything we had planned together now would never happen. I would never see him again...

I turned my head then to see the rest of the friends and family walking off in the distance. Jake's widow was sobbing on Jana's shoulder. Yes...Jake had been married. We'd planned so much. We fell in love while we were both locked in the Cordon. Jake told me he was going to leave her when it was all over...but that day never came. He got sick before he could...

I put my hand on my growing belly as I watched them. I hadn't told anyone about the baby. It was my secret. I'd never even told a soul how I loved Jake. Not even Jana, my best friend. I didn't want them to think badly of him and I defintely did not want pity. I'd raise this baby on my own, without their help although I knew they would have offered it.

I had no choice now anyway. I had to raise it on my own...without him. I walked home then and as night descended upon Atlanta, I crawled into my empty bed. I bunched the covers around me. I used to fall asleep in Jake's arms back at the hospital. The sound of his heartbeat was my lullaby...

When I finally closed my eyes, I dreamed of him - nightmares and memories mixed together, frightening me. I woke up gasping, drenched in sweat. I turned over in my bed and my eyes found the picture of Jake resting on my nightstand. Tears ran down my cheeks once more.

I loved and I loved and I lost you.

I loved and I loved and I lost you.

I loved and I loved and I lost you.

And it hurts....