.

.

.

You

"Alright, go on."

Itto

"You're not coming?!"

Shinobu

"Itto, they've already said they wouldn't be doing too much."

You

"Don't worry about it. If anything goes wrong, like a crazy man waving a lit torch at you, we'll take care of it."

"As I said, just do your thing."

You and Scaramouche were sitting next to one other on a small hill, hidden behind the shrubs. You looked through them from time to time, keeping an eye on Itto and Shinobu. 

Scaramouche

"... Man! Boooring!"

You

"Stop complaining."

Scaramouche stretched his arms high in the air as he whined about how uninteresting this was, and then slumped to his side the moment he dropped his arms, his head falling straight onto your lap. 

You

"Scaramouche, do you ever realize how childish you act sometimes?"

Scaramouche

"Pfft, no."

He said, with peak confidence

AS HE SHOULDDD 😘💪✌️😻

He folded his arms while resting his head on your lap. You put your hand on his face and started messing up his bangs for the fun of it; he laughed and shoved your hand aside.

You

"... The Tenryou Commission shouldn't know about this island, right?"

Scaramouche

"I mean, like we said before, it's farther than ours, so why would they know?"

You

"I don't know, it's just making me a bit anxious."

Scaramouche

"Hehe... What's this? Y/N's scared?!"

You

"You make it sound like I've never been scared before."

Scaramouche

"Now that I think of it, I can't really remember a time I saw you with true fear."

You

"Really? You were there the whooole time while Dottore kept on poking me with needles to fill me up with drugs. Now that, that was scary."

Scaramouche

"Oh shit!... Right... I totally forgot about that. That went down like... A month ago."

You

"Ah, how time passes by so quickly."

Scaramouche

"It feels like I've been living this life forever."

You

"Hey, at least you've got your mind off of the Fatui."

He shifted his head to stare straight up at you, his head still resting on your lap. You smiled down at him, and he returned your smile.

You could hear an old man shouting the word "devil" repeatedly.

Scaramouche

"Ooh..."

"I think Itto's been discovered."

You

"Let's go watch this."

You carefully lifted Scaramouche's head off your lap and peered through the bushes.

You

"Haha, look! He's on the run!"

Scaramouche

"This is definitely not gonna leave a good memory in Itto's head."

You and Scaramouche stood incredibly close together, watching Shinobu struggle to keep everything under control as Itto raced around foolishly carrying a chair.

Scaramouche

"Pfft, out of all things, the guy decided to steal a chair?"

You

"Ha!"

"... But look, Shinobu's using him as a distraction. Clever woman."

Shinobu signalled Itto to begin running back to the boat; the elderly man had little chance of catching up with him. He tossed the chair to the side to quicken his speed, and it broke as it fell.

Scaramouche

"I guess they're done."

You

"Mhm. Let's go."

You arrived at the boat before the two, and as soon as they arrived, you departed. More people from the island, which was unexpected given how remote the island was, walked all the way up to the shore, yelling the Balladeer's name.

Scaramouche

"Oh, man..."

Itto

"Wow!" *Pant* *Pant* "You're like a celebrity, Scaramouche!"

Scaramouche

"I wish I wasn't."

As the villagers' shouts faded slowly, the two of them struggled to regain their breath.

Scaramouche

"How annoying..."

You

"Well!... That was... A job well done?..."

Shinobu

"Itto's gotta learn how to stop panicking."

Itto

"I've never done this before! "

Shinobu

"Yeah, neither have I."

You

"Alright, but out of all things..."

"..."

"A chair?..."

Itto

"Augh, listen! I panicked, and the only thing in my head was the objective, so I just took whatever was closest to me!"

Shinobu

"Well, now we know that Itto could be the distraction for any upcoming missions."

Itto

"Whaaat?!"

You

"Sounds good to me."

Itto

"No- But- Me?! The distraction?!"

You

"My exact reaction when I heard that people call me Scaramouche's 'sidekick."

Scaramouche

"Hehe, I'm never gonna get over that."

Itto

"Stop changing the subject!"

Shinobu

"Itto the distraction... Has a ring to it."

Itto

"Aww man, this is so unfair..."

.

.

.

Shinobu

"Some ancient statue thing... And a small painting I found. I noticed an empty spot on the wall in your living room when I slept there, and it bothered me, so I thought that a new taste of furniture and decoration wouldn't hurt."

You

"Wow! How thoughtful. Well done."

Itto

"What about me?!"

You

"You both did well."

Itto

"Yeah, running away from an angry old man is such a job well done..."

You

"It was teamwork."

"Itto worked well as a distraction, and-"

Itto

"I get it! Stop repeating it over and over again!"

He complained, you all chuckled.

You

"What a day... Did it really take us that long? The sun's almost set."

Scaramouche

"I guess it did take us that long. Though, it only feels like it's been an hour or so..."

You

"What do you mean? You were the one complaining about how boring it was, watching Itto and Shinobu empty an old man's home of furniture."

Scaramouche

"Shh! We don't talk about that."

Embarrassed, he was worried that you would bring up the part when he rested on your lap.

.

.

.

Cheers!

After a successful expedition, you all agreed it would be a good idea to celebrate with a night of drinking.

You all clinked your glasses together, consuming a large amount of alcohol all at once. Scaramouche was confused, holding his glass of beer awkwardly. He didn't take a drink, instead observing how everyone else sipped their booze.

Kazuha

"Ah, so it was a job well done. Congratulations."

Itto

"I swear to god, N/N... If you bring up-"

You

"You know that Itto was the distraction?!"

Itto

"Agh! So mean!"

You

"Ahaha!"

You were already getting a little tipsy.

Scaramouche

"Uh..."

Scaramouche was unaccustomed to it all. He had no clue what the liquid in his glass was, and he had no idea why everyone at the table was talking so loudly.

You

"Scaramouche? Are you alright?"

Scaramouche

"Huh? Oh yeah, yeah, I'm great... Yeah."

You

"Ooh... Have you drank before?"

Scaramouche

"..."

"Huh?"

You

"You know..."

You took the empty beer can and imitated a drunk person by bringing it up to your mouth and pretending to chug it.

Scaramouche

"I- What are you doing?..."

You

"Oh. So I guess not."

Scaramouche

"By drinking do you mean... Like water? Tea? Then yes, I've-"

You

"No, no, I mean... Drinking. Drinking alcohol."

Scaramouche

*Sniff* "Eugh! Why does it smell like that?!"

He held the glass of beer up to his nose and smelled it.

You

"Haha, that's just the way it always smells."

Scaramouche

"Ew... I don't think I want to try... What's this called?"

"Bee ear..."

Scaramouche squinted his eyes at the beer can he held, comparing it to his glass of beer, and everyone at the table laughed.

Kazuha

"Scaramouche, it's pronounced 'beer."

Scaramouche

"Yeah, that's what I said!"

You

"You're more than welcome to taste it."

Scaramouche

"What?! No way! If it smells like that, I'm not drinking anything. What's so good about it anyway? All of you have had so many glasses of it."

Itto

"Because the feeling of being drunk gives me a good spirit! So, I figured that it would work for you too!"

Scaramouche

"A good spirit?..."

"Ew..."