Why didnt the toilet paper cross the road?
Because it was stuck on a crack (found dis on vine-)

What did the duck say when it bought lipstick?
"Put it on my bill"

A man was hit on the head with a can of cola,but he was alright since it was a soft drink

What happens when a frog's car breaks down?
It gets toad away

I gave all my dead batteries away today,free of charge

Parallel lines have so much in common,too bad they'll never meet

My wife accused me of bring immature,i told her to get out of my fort

Thats all ;-;