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"Dammit," I cursed, as Nat helped pull my dress off, revealing a large bruise across my rib cage. It must've happened in the skirmish with Alessandro.

"You alright?" Nat asked, for probably the fiftieth time since we'd gotten back to the hotel.

I nodded stiffly. She and Steve wouldn't stop asking that. Loki had asked only once, to which I'd nodded silently. Ever since, he'd just been watching me quietly. I tried not to pay any attention, which was easy because I couldn't seem to pull my mind out of the trunk.

Somewhere deep in my mind, I wanted him to ask me again. I wanted him to say anything, because the sound of his voice seemed like the only thing that could calm the panic in my throat as I continued to flash back to being locked in that tight, dark trunk. To the moment Alessandro revealed himself.

And then, I realized something.

"My name," I gasped, "Back in Italy, when he took me on a date. Alessandro knew my name. He called me Alivia, and I—I didn't even notice. But I was using a fake name, after Greenwich. God, I'm so stupid."

"No, you're normal," Nat responded flatly.

I looked up at her. "What?"

"You're just a normal person. Not some super-spy who's been conditioned to notice things like that. That isn't ever something you should apologize for or beat yourself up over."

Her words made sense but in the moment, they went in one ear and out the other.

Nat dragged a cloth over my face, pulling me out of my thoughts.

"Here," she said, when she was finished wiping off my makeup, "Put this on."

She handed me a large grey t-shirt and a pair of shorts, and I pulled them both on numbly. It wasn't just the trunk that had me reeling from a numb sort of panic. It was also the fear that we'd run into a dead end. That this was all for nothing.

The door creaked open just as I slipped the top over my head.

"Do they not knock on Asgard?" Nat folded her arms.

"I don't," Loki informed her, before his eyes drifted to me, "Better?" He asked.

I nodded, but I knew the minute his eyes met mine that he didn't believe me.

He sighed, pressing his lips together before fishing something from his pocket. He handed it to Nat. It was the phone.

"See what you can get out of that," he said as she took it.

Nat nodded before looking to me. "You'll be okay?"

"I will if you find something useful on that phone," I said, cracking a smile that didn't reach my eyes.

She rubbed my shoulder before stalking from the room.

I exited the bathroom, slumping down onto my bed. Steve was sitting on the dresser by the window, waiting. Loki came after me, sitting down beside me.

I watched his hand move closer to me before freezing. Like he wanted to touch me but thought better of it.

"You've got to try to put this all out of your head for the night, Al," Steve said, "You need to rest."

"I will," I tried to assure him, "So do you."

"I think we're all in need of some rest," Loki said, "Rogers, less so. Don't suppose it takes much energy to chase your tail around uselessly while the rest of us work."

"Saves the world once and thinks he's better than everyone," Steve rolled his eyes, to which I chuckled softly. Sighing, he pushed off from the dresser and made for the door. "I'm just across the hall if you need anything, Al."

"Thank you," I smiled thinly at him. And then it was just Loki and I.

"I should leave you then," Loki said, as he, too, stood to go. I wanted to grab his hand and pull him back. And I wanted to kick myself for wanting that.

I said nothing as Loki pulled open the door. Even though I very much wanted to tell him to stay. But then, as though hearing my thoughts, he froze in the doorway, looking over his shoulder at me.

"I do hope that should you find yourself in need of company tonight, you find my room. Not his," he said softly.

Then he turned to leave. I forced the words out before I could stop myself. "Loki, I need an answer."

He froze again. "I'm sorry?" He asked, without looking back at me.

"The way you spoke to me when I was trapped... I can't make sense of how you feel towards me. I just don't understand it. Don't understand you."

He bristled. Backed up. Pulled the door closed. But he still didn't turn to me.

"I would've torn apart and slaughtered the entire Gala until I found you."

I nearly jumped with the shock of his words.

"What does that—What is that supposed to mean?" I asked.

"It means that—" He paused suddenly, as though carefully considering his next words. "That I won't let anyone else have you. Not Rogers, not anybody. It means that you belong to me. Pet." He added the name almost like an afterthought.

I frowned. "You're lying. The problem is, I can't tell what about. I wish that I wasn't so morbidly curious, I wish it didn't burn at me to know, but I am and it does. I want you to be honest. You have never, in all my years of knowing you, opened up to me. Why? Do you really care so little for me?"

"I'm not having this discussion. I told you all you needed to know in the dungeon."

"But—"

"But what? Are you, after all this time, still harbouring your desperate, unrequited love?" He seemed almost to shock himself with his venomous words. I drew back, like he'd slapped me.

Love? I didn't love him. But even as I thought it, I knew it wasn't true. I did. I had for a long time. Which was why I couldn't leave it be.

But he was right. He had given me an answer back in the dungeons. And it was an answer I'd have to live with.

I was shocked at the hot tears I felt burning my eyes. I blinked rapidly, pushing to my feet.

I avoided Loki's gaze as I made toward the door, but felt his hand clamp down on my arm, drawing me back.

"Alivia..." He said, and there was a look on his face that I couldn't even begin to decipher. And I wouldn't even let myself try.

I wrenched my arm free, only succeeding because he'd let me. Then I pushed toward the door. I wrenched it open, fighting back the hot sting of my tears and the ache in my throat as I said, "You're right. You gave me an answer, and I don't expect you to lie to make me feel better." Then I turned to face him. "I wish I didn't feel the way I did about you, because it hurts. Every time you pull away, it hurts. But you're entitled to feel what you feel, and I'll stop—" My voice cracked with the effort to keep it even. "I'll stop feeling the way I do towards you. And I'll stop asking for answers that only let me down. I'm sorry."

With that, I turned from the room, closing the door quickly behind me before I could dwell on the shocked expression that settled over his features at my words.

I knew I couldn't really just stop feeling the way I did for him. I knew there was no off switch for that. But there was a way I could forget. And he was right across the hall from me.

After all, he'd said he was there if I needed him.

Right now, I very much did.

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