───────── ➶ ⁺ ➴ ─────────

𝗬𝗢𝗨 𝗕𝗘𝗟𝗢𝗡𝗚 𝗪𝗜𝗧𝗛 𝗠𝗘

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
but if he's a ghost, then I can be a
phantom

───────── ➶ ⁺ ➴ ─────────

time jump to february!

REAL LIFE

IN ALL HONESTY, Luna had no fucking clue why she said yes to Sam and Colby when they asked her to join them on a ghost investigation.

Well, actually, yes she did. It was kind of a chain reaction — Karl would only do it if Noah did it, Noah would only do it if Luna did it, and Luna would only do it if Mary Jane did it. So now it was just their big group of four going on a ghost investigation with Sam and Colby.

Not to mention that it was two days before her album, Good Riddance, was going to be released. Great timing, right?

Luna was scrolling through her phone, hanging out with the others while Sam and Colby filmed their intro. She suddenly heard a hum.

Luna glanced up. "What'd you say?"

Mary Jane frowned. "None of us said anything."

"Wait, what?" Karl asked. "No, I heard that. That wasn't any of us?"

Mary Jane then suddenly gripped Luna's arm, her eyes wide. "Luna."

Luna glanced up, only for a full blown shadow figure to appear, only to disappear in the same second. Her eyes widened as well and she moved closer to Mary Jane.

"Sam?" Luna called. "Colby?"

After that fiasco, they gave more time to Sam and Colby to film themselves before it was time for their intro. They moved further into the building, the only light source being the bright one on top of the camera.

"Tonight, we are here with Karl, Noah, Luna, and Mary Jane," Colby announced.

Karl laughed nervously. "Pretending to be excited but actually so scared right now."

"I don't know who thought it was a good idea for me to do this two days before my album comes out," Luna admitted.

"Oh yeah!" Colby exclaimed. "By the time this goes up, it'll be out. Go stream it."

Luna gave a thumbs-up to the camera. "It's called Good Riddance."

Noah put a hand on his chest. "My heart is already, like, racing, like you can feel it. It's like boom boom."

Colby then put his hand on Noah's chest, but it was in a weird spot. Luna's eyebrows knit in confusion and she looked at Mary Jane, only for the two of them to immediately burst into giggles.

Colby turned to them. "One to ten, ten being, like, I believe, one being, like, I'm skeptical, where do you land on the believe scale?"

"It started at a seven, and now, just walking in here, I'm at an eight," Karl answered.

"I was gonna do one lower," Noah said. "I was gonna say, like, a six-point-three, and now I'm at, like, a seven-point-one."

"Eight," Mary Jane replied. "I think they exist, but some things can just be explained without paranormal shit."

Luna smiled at the camera. "Ten."

"Ten?" Sam repeated in shock. "Wait, why?"

She shrugged. "Nothing's proven to me that they don't exist. Besides, I write lyrics about haunted homes and ghosts, so that has to count for something."

They talked a little bit about what happened earlier, and all of them — besides Sam and Colby — said that this was their first ghost experience.

"This might be the most haunted city in America, allegedly," Sam stated.

Mary Jane gave him a pointed look. "Which would've been nice to know earlier."

"We mentioned that about six minutes ago."

"There's a lot of things we didn't mention, like the shadow person that roams here and kills you," Colby told them.

Luna's mouth fell open in shock. "I'm sorry?" She cleared her throat and pulled out her phone. "Okay, guys, booking the next flight to North Carolina, see you."

"He will kill you in your sleep."

Mary Jane pointed to her. "I can't believe you did this to me."

Luna giggled. "If I go down, you're going with me."

"Trespassing, attack ghosts," Colby read from the sign on the wall when they started to climb the stairs.

"Wait, you weren't kidding about the killer attack ghosts," Noah voiced.

"I thought they were supposed to be nice here," Sam said. "Oh, wait, not the fourth floor."

"What do you mean not the fourth floor?" Karl questioned.

"We'll get to that."

"Or the third, or the basement," Colby added.

It was just safe to say Luna had no idea what she had gotten herself into. Nevertheless, she held onto Noah's hand tightly as they went upstairs to the second floor. Turns out, most of the place were actually abandoned. The tour guide had told them not to step on the wrong floor boards so they wouldn't fall through, aka the ones that looked sketchy, but in the wise words of Karl, they all looked sketchy.

They continued up to the third floor, where the floor did feel way less sturdy than before. Sam then pointed the camera through a window to see inside the next room that they all believed they couldn't get into . . . well, besides Luna and Mary Jane, who walked through the door.

"Or we can go thorough the door?" Mary Jane suggested.

Sam sighed. "This is why we brought you guys along."

"Oh, man, I'm smiling, but in, like, a very nervous way," Karl admitted. "In a nervous I'm not friends with Sam and Colby anymore way."

"Wait, I have a quick question," Noah cut in. "Is there, like, ghost etiquette? Social cues I should be looking out for?"

"He doesn't even do that with real humans."

"Don't yell out and scream out and taunt people," Sam instructed.

"So, don't be like, fuck you?" Noah shouted.

Luna blinked at him. "You mean don't do exactly what you just did?"

"What you just did is literally what some past people have done in this exact building, and got thrown down the stairs," Sam told him.

Noah's eyes widened. "Really?"

Mary Jane shrugged. "If you get thrown down the stairs, that's on you, buddy."

"This floor is considered the most violent," Sam said. "Especially if you call out to them."

So, basically, everything that Noah was doing — wrong.

Colby picked up a wire on the floor. "Oh, wait, what the hell is this?"

Karl walked over to him. "Oh my God, this must be the ghost's iPhone charger."

They brought them into another room on the top floor, which apparently had an elevator shaft and a . . . demon circle?

"Guys, I don't think we should keep secrets from each other anymore," Luna revealed.

So, apparently, the demon circle upstairs had been used for recent rituals. It was a circle of bricks with a Home Depot bucket in the middle. At glance, it seemed harmless, but Luna wasn't taking any chances.

"What?" Luna inquired as Noah let go of her hand and walked directly into the circle. "Why? Noah, why?"

He raised his hands in surrender. "Nothing happened, I'm fine."

"Watch, you're gonna be possessed," Mary Jane voiced.

Sam then told them the fourth floor is where the non-believers got targeted the most.

"Ghosts, demons, I'm on your side," Noah called.

"On your side?" Luna repeated incredulously. "Noah, I swear to God, if you bring a ghost home with us, I'm going to be so fucking mad at you."

"Holy shit, dude," Mary Jane added. "You're on one right now."

A psychic then came to gave them a tour, along with two members of a paranormal team. Luna now kept her arm locked with Mary Jane's, because after what the fuck Noah just said, holding his hand while he was on Team Demon wasn't exactly something she wanted to do. However, while the psychic was talking, the camera instantly shut off. It was then said it wasn't the first time that happened, and it wouldn't be the last.

Colby suddenly jumped from a bird. "Oh my God, sorry, that scared me."

"That's Harry the pigeon," Mike, the member of the paranormal team, explained.

"Does Harry have a girlfriend?"

Mike told them the story of James Stark, the town drunk, and Philp Minis, a doctor, who set up a duel. Minis, however, never showed up, and Stark declared his victory. However, Minis didn't like that, and showed up in the building, shooting and killing Stark on the staircase.

Luna suddenly glanced over, only to see Noah sitting on Karl's lap on the Home Depot bucket in the demon circle. "Huh?"

"Do you think this will attract the ghosts, or—" Sam began.

"It attracts me," Colby interjected.

"God damn, I have to fight off everybody nowadays," Luna said. "I'm no match for Colby Brock."

"Oh, don't worry, Lunes," Noah reassured her. "You can have a duel with him over me."

"Wow. Gee, thanks."

Mike then showed them evidence — a video about a whistle and movement when it wasn't them, a video about how a little orb traveled throughout a way and how he touched the spot it entered him. They then went down to the basement, where the psychic said she was drawn to a back corner.

"Basically, from this pillar back, people very typically feel like they're getting lightheaded or dizzy," Mike stated. "We don't know if there's a portal situation or if it's just, like, circle of energy or whatever it is. I don't like going over in this area."

While he was saying that, the lights flickered overhead. Luna instantly got chills up her spine.

Sam looked over to Noah. "You wanna stand over there real quick? He's our little guinea pig."

Luna watched him go into the corner they were talking about. "Oh, there he goes." They then turned off the lights. "You okay over there?"

"I'm good," Noah responded.

Mike then started explaining about Toby, the little kid spirit. They moved further into the basement to where the tunnel once was, but the camera shut off again. However, when the psychic started to say what she was saying again, the camera immediately shut off. It was just crazy how the camera shut off two times when the psychic was trying to say the same sentence. And it wasn't even fully turned off . . . almost like the ghosts didn't want her sentence to be recorded.

Yeah, Luna was fucking right about being a ten on the believing scale.

Since they were dealing with a duel, to get the spirits going, Sam and Colby gave Noah and Karl hats and Nerf guns to mimic a duel. Noah and Karl stood back to back and took three steps away from each other before turning around. Karl shot, but Noah ducked low to the ground and headshot Karl somehow.

Noah smirked and spun the gun around in his hand. "Stark strikes again."

Mary Jane stepped forwards. "Lunes, you and me."

"Oh," Luna let out. "You're going down, for sure." She walked up to Noah and took the cowboy hat off of his head, placing it on her own. "Gun, please."

Noah handed her the gun. "M'lady."

She pressed her back up against Mary Jane's. Colby called them to start, and Luna took three steps forwards before whirling around. She lifted up her gun and shut one eye, pulling the trigger. It instantly hit Mary Jane in the forehead with surprising accuracy.

"Yo!" Sam shouted. "That was insane."

Luna shrugged. "Yeah, I play Valorant. It's whatever."

"I don't have the FPS advantage," Mary Jane complained.

Colby then challenged Sam to a duel. They too the hats and guns from Luna and Mary Jane and just went . . . absolutely crazy. All Luna had to say that it ended with Sam mimicking hitting Colby on the back with the gun.

They then started the investigation, and Sam had a red mark on the back of his neck that looked like a scratch. Once they moved on from that, they went to the stairs where Stark had been killed.

"I think Stark's a little bitch," Noah admitted.

"Noah, please," Luna begged. "You're stressing me out."

"I don't know where that came from, I just got really brave for a second. Stark, Stark, I didn't mean that!"

"It came out of nowhere!" Luna insisted. "Stop being brave, please."

They set up flashlights, which they could turn on and off for questions, and a REM-Pod, which detected motion. Everyone — except Karl, for some reason, who sat on the stairs — gathered around. Sam called out to move next to the little red light to let them know that they were there. And immediately, the REM-Pod went off. Luna's mouth fell open in shock. No way.

Karl jumped off the stairs and launched himself into Sam's arms. "Stop that, stop that."

Mary Jane stared at it in shock. "Holy shit."

It went off again when Sam asked, which was just absolutely blowing Luna's mind. According to Sam, it never went off that quickly. One of the flashlights then turned on on its own, and turned off when Sam asked if they wanted to talk to them. It didn't really respond to Karl's questions, but the flashlight did turn on when Sam asked if they were welcome. They waited for a little while, but nothing else really happened until Colby said it was the trickster and the REM-Pod went crazy. Sam then asked them to turn it off, and everything went off. It then responded to Sam, saying that they wanted to talk to them individually.

"What do you say about doing a little split up?" Sam suggested.

"Dude, no way," Mary Jane voiced. "I should've known. I should've fucking known. This is a Sam and Colby classic. Not sure how I didn't see this coming."

"Wait, like, by ourselves?" Luna asked. "Like, isolated? Because I will start crying."

"No, not like that," Colby replied. "Like, the four of you will go upstairs and Sam and I will go downstairs."

"Don't worry, Luna, I'll stay with you," Noah offered.

"That would usually reassure me, but ever since you said you were on team demon, I've been hesitant to stand by you."

The four of them got the top floor, given nothing but night vision cameras and an EMF reader that was going off. Sam and Colby left them on their own, which meant that they took the light with them. Fifteen minutes of nothing but pitch black.

Luna moved closer to Mary Jane. "Holy shit, it's so dark. It's my biggest fear."

Mary Jane stopped in her tracks, squinting through the dark. "Are y'all in the demon circle?"

"Follow my voice," Karl said.

"That's not fucking helping, Karl."

Luna stopped as well outside of the demon circle — like she said earlier, she wasn't taking any chances. The EMF went off when Karl asked if there was anything in the circle, but nothing when they asked if it was Toby — to which Karl called him a bitch, only because they weren't in front of Sam and Colby.

"Wait, what if I sit on your lap?" Noah inquired.

"We can sit on each other's laps," Karl agreed.

"What?" Luna let out.

"Is this something that you like? Do you like this?" Karl then started to giggle. "The ghosts don't even fuck with us anymore."

Mary Jane nudged Luna's side. "Idiots. They left us with idiots."

"MJ, if we leave, nobody will know we're gone," Luna said.

"Yeah, Lunes. Let's stumble around in the dark. Good idea."

Luna laughed a little. "Oh, shit. I forgot." She then jumped at the loud noise. "Holy fuck."

"What was that?" Noah asked.

The EMF went off when they asked if it was them who made that noise, and continued going crazy when they moved towards the noise — why they decided to go in the way of danger, Luna didn't know. Luna then felt somebody bump into her, and she screamed.

"Oh shit, that was me." Noah put a hand on her shoulder. "Sorry, Lunes, that was me."

Luna put her hand on her chest. "Jesus Christ. Don't do that."

He planted a kiss to the top of her head, even in the dark. "Sorry, I'm sorry."

Noah and Karl then decided to climb up the ladder in the room in the pitch black for some reason. Luna and Mary Jane decided to stay at the bottom — one, the platform the ladder went to was pretty small for four people, and two, Luna was almost positive trying to climb in the dark would lead to her just falling. She was already doing a ghost investigation, she didn't want to break her bones while she was at it.

"If you guys don't push me down this ladder when I climb down, I think you're a little bitch," Noah threatened.

"Noah," Luna scolded. "I'm going to slam my head against the wall, please."

"Stop being brave," Mary Jane demanded. "Literally stop—" Mary Jane then froze, staring in the corner. "Anybody else hear that?"

"It's Noah's fault."

"Luna!" Noah protested.

Sam and Colby then came back upstairs, and Noah and Karl got down from the ladder. They explained what had happened with the noise and the corner and shit.

But that wasn't the only place they were going tonight. Besides that building, they were going to a house that was built over a graveyard of bodies from the Revolutionary War. Colby drove them there and parked, and the six of them stood outside the house.

"Dude, if somebody made a park over my dead body, I'd be so pissed," Karl said.

They went inside, which was actually pretty creepy. Since they moved away from the other place, Luna decided to take Noah's hand again, considering the spirits there didn't know he was on team demon. Francis Sorrel was the one who had built this house, and his son ran a hospital in the basement, where a lot of people had died due to a twenty percent success rate, according to the tour guide.

Francis also married his dead wife's younger sister, Matilda . . . which was just weird.

After going into the carriage house, where Molly — Matilda's slave — lived, they went back to the main house.

"1837," Sam voiced. "Literally, like, two-hundred years old."

"Yeah, that's, like, Foolish's mom's age," Karl added.

Luna gasped. "Do not disrespect Mama Foosh like that, you motherfucker."

Colby then pointed to a frame on the wall with much more urgency than what was needed. It displayed Francis and his wife and the years they lived.

"I'm gonna say it, Francis kind of looks like a dick," Karl admitted.

"I'm down to shit talk Francis," Noah agreed.

"No," Mary Jane refused. "You're done shit talking people. We've had enough of that from you today."

"That's crazy."

They moved onto the ladies' parlor. It was nice in there, but known to have a lot of activity.

"A piano!" Karl exclaimed. "Luna, go on."

"Oh, okay," Luna let out. She went over and sat down at the piano. Like a second nature, she placed her fingers on the keys and played a chord, but immediately cringed. "Ooh, that was a little out of tune."

"Play something."

"Geez, you're demanding today." Luna readjusted her hands on the keys and played a very, very short part of I know it won't work, the others dancing behind her. "There you go."

They moved onto the mens' parlor, and then the dining room, where there was a portrait of George Washington.

"Oh my God, George!" Colby exclaimed.

Sam looked at the painting. "Mr. Wash?"

"Mr. Washing."

Francis haunted the dining room, and Sam and Colby told them he moved the table and everything on it — like that one Halloween episode of Suite Life of Zack and Cody.

Noah clapped his hands together. "All right, Francis, you motherfucker."

"I regret my life," Luna stated. "I regret everything. Why are you saying these things?"

"I'm sorry, I'll stop."

"I don't believe you."

They went down to the basement, which was a home for shadow figures — which, of course it would be the fucking basement. After touring everything, they went back upstairs to the dining room. Colby set up the Music Box outside, and when it turned on, it played the most stereotypical creepy nursery rhyme song.

"Okay, what?" Mary Jane asked. "There's no way they decided to use that creepy ass song for this."

Once everything was set up, both the Music Box and the REM-Pod went off at the same time. Luna slightly jumped, glancing in between them with her eyes wide. Well, okay. They kept going off until they eventually turned off.

Sam and Colby alternated asking questions, and ultimately, the Music Box went off the most, signaling that people were going up and down the stairs — and Colby just casually dropped that there were phantom parties.

"Is that, like, a sign to go downstairs?" Colby inquired.

"I think that's a sign to go downstairs," Sam confirmed.

"Mmm, not so sure about that," Mary Jane stated. "We've been having a hell of a party up here."

Luna nodded. "So true, MJ. So true."

"We didn't bring any cookies, though," Colby voiced.

The Music Box then went off, as if they were agreeing.

"Oatmeal raisin?" Karl offered. "Or chocolate chip, maybe?"

"Oatmeal raisin?" Noah repeated. "No way they want oatmeal raisin."

Luna put her face in her hands. "There's no way you're debating about cookies right now."

"No, Luna, that's actually valid," Mary Jane insisted. "Biting into a raisin cookie thinking it's chocolate chip . . . no pain like it."

They went back down to the basement. As they were setting up, Karl said he heard something from the stairs, like people were still coming back down.

"So the — so the party's down here now, or?" Noah questioned.

"The party's wherever you're at, man," Colby told him.

"Yeah, Noah brings the party," Sam responded.

"So we have something fun for one of you guys," Colby explained after a motion sensor light fiasco. "It's called the Estes Method. It's really fun."

"Yeah, I don't trust you," Mary Jane said. "What is that?"

"You're not going to be able to see or hear anything except for the radio. We're gonna ask questions. You only say what you're hearing. Basically the ghost is using you as a vessel to talk."

"A vessel?" Luna echoed.

Colby looked at her. "You want to do it?"

"Uh . . ." Luna trailed off. "Okay, if you want me to."

"You don't have to do it if you don't want to."

"No, I can do it. You just have to promise that you won't leave, I mean it."

"Luna, I would never leave you," Noah told her.

"I don't trust that, no offense," Luna replied.

"I'm taking extreme offense, actually."

Mary Jane nodded. "Luna, I'll stay, even if these motherfuckers decide to go."

Luna let out a deep breath, her heart racing against her chest. "Okay. I got it." She sat down on the couch, and once Noah and Mary Jane took their seats next to her, she took each of their hands and placed them on her knees. "I will know if you leave. Stay with me."

She put on the blindfold, immediately encasing herself with darkness. Luna then put the headphones on, and immediately, all she could hear was radio static. It was kind of weird not having two of her senses and just being completely under, unaware of everything.

All she heard through the static was twenty, shut, taking, stop, talking, time, residents, stop, today, let go, be careful, suckers, no, no, several, continue, yelling, woman, look, please, work, nice, please, hi, be nice, go, very, bad — which she did put her own hands over Noah and Mary Jane's on her knees because holy shit, unionize, we are, recognize, test, Michael, psychology, young people, sacrifice.

Until she felt a tap on her shoulder. She lifted up her blindfold and blinked a couple of times to adjust to the harsh lighting from the camera. Luna then too off the headphones.

"What?" Luna inquired, looking at all of their panicked faces. "What happened?"

"Right after you said sacrifice young people," Sam said.

"Oh my God." Luna let out a breath. "That was fucking terrifying. Did we get anything?"

"I mean, it was hard to decide exactly who we were talking to 'cause you said twenty people were down here, which would make sense 'cause of how many times that would go off," Colby responded.

After a bit more discussion, they went back outside, in between the main house and the carriage house.

"Time for the last investigation," Sam announced. "We thought no better thing to do on your very first investigation to, uh, split you guys up in completely different houses and send you off in duos. Ya down?"

Mary Jane raised her hand. "Can Luna be my duo?"

"So—"

"Fuck you."

Sam chuckled. "It's going to be Karl and MJ and Luna and Noah."

"Sam and Colby, if we die, Karl and I are going to haunt your asses," Mary Jane threatened.

"I'm ready to take on the ghoulies," Noah revealed.

"You're gonna be alone with Francis, you were calling him a bitch earlier," Colby said.

"I'm ready to shit talk Francis, to be clear. I hope he slaps me around or something."

"Why am I going with him?" Luna asked. "This is unbelievable." She launched herself into Mary Jane's arms. "MJ, if I die, it's his fault."

"I'll kill him in retaliation," Mary Jane replied.

"That's what I'm fucking talking about."

Noah pulled away from his own hug from Karl. "What the fuck?"

Mary Jane waved at him. "Bye, bitch."

"Karl, I love you," Luna voiced.

They then split up — Luna and Noah went into the main house, and Mary Jane and Karl went into the carriage house. Sam gave them a REM-pod and a Music Box, which immediately went off.

"That's so fucked up," Luna revealed. "I just want to play the piano to pass the time."

"Lunes, no," Noah said.

"It'll mask the sound of the Music Box. Do you think Francis will like I miss you, I'm sorry on piano?"

"I wanted to come in here to shit talk Francis a little bit, huh?"

"And it'll also mask the sound of you shit talking ghosts," Luna added. "A win win in my book."

Noah pointed the camera at the picture of Francis. "First of all, I don't like your glasses." He paused for a moment. "Francis, I hate what you did with the place. You chose the wrong couch, I would've gone with something a little more magenta."

Luna giggled. "Magenta?"

He laughed with her. "It was the first thing that came to mind."

Nothing really happened in the house in the fifteen minutes they were there, besides at the end, when the REM-Pod just started going off — probably because Noah said it was a stupid name.

"Oh, Noah!" Sam called. "Oh, Luna!"

"Hey," Luna greeted, dragging out the y.

They told them what happened in their respective houses before going outside to film the outro. Overall, all of them increased their believe rating from the beginning of the video — except for Luna, who was a ten at the beginning and a ten now.

"Would you guys do this again?" Colby questioned.

Luna nodded, grinning brightly. "Yeah, for sure. Maybe not the Estes Method because that freaked me the fuck out. Somebody else can have a turn."

Well, at the end of the day . . . a paranormal investigation was done, and now all Luna had to do was focus on her album release.

＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊＊*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

INSTAGRAM

liked by colbybrock, samgolbach, and 710,387 others

lunahayes "'cause I'm your ghost right now, your house is haunted" :)
went on a spooky adventure!!! it was cool!!! thank you samandcolby you guys are awesome <3 and thank you karljacobs, maryjanebrooks, and foolish_gamers for sticking by my side because I could NOT do this alone
p.s. if the rest of our lives are haunted it's all noah's fault

view all 5,219 comments

username IS THAT A NEW LYRIC????? LUNA?????
— username WE'RE SO CLOSE TO HEARING IT I'M GOING TO SCREAM

username the collab of the century

username my favorite youtubers with my favorite streamers and favorite actress? what the fuck is going on
— username this is my multiverse of madness

samandcolby we love you guys!!! you went crazy!!! especially you luna
— username WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT DID LUNA DO
— username oh my god. I can't wait to watch this
— lunahayes hehehehehehe

username wait why is it noah's fault
— lunahayes homeboy decided to take all the advice sam and colby gave us and throw it out the window
— username of course he did

foolish_gamers I did nothing wrong
— username I don't believe you.
— maryjanebrooks you did everything wrong
— username MJ LMAOOOOO
— lunahayes true :D

username LUNA WHY ARE YOU GOING ON A GHOST ADVENTURE TWO DAYS BEFORE YOUR ALBUM COMES OUT
— lunahayes I like to live life on the edge
— username OH 😭😭😭😭

-ˏˋ ♥̩͙♥̩̩̥͙♥̩̥̩ ˊˎ-

foosh & karl: *fucking around*
luna & mj: ?????

anyways, y'all watching the s&c conjuring house series? bc if you're not then wtf are you doing