Reviewer : Lily A_Tiger_Lily

Book: Tale of wishing flower fairy

Author: AuthorAsteria_613

Description: ⅕
There was nothing catchy in the description. It was rarely a blurb. We wouldn't call it a blurb unless it has some interesting dialogues, scenes or any happening of events which gives us a glimpse of the story and is capable enough to catch reader's attention. It was void of all the things mentioned above. There are grammatical errors in that as well such as wrong usage of tense. You should add a few interesting dialogues or some interesting and suspenseful events from the story which can force a reader to open the book. 

Cover: ⅗
It is pretty simple and the creativity level is zero. However, I think the theme somehow matches the story. It gives the vibes of some fantasy genre story which is suitable for the plot you have used. But I suggest you change it as it looks boring and doesn't grab the attention. I might skip it while scrolling down the stories. You can order a cover from our shop as well. 

Title: ⅗
It was so long. Usually people leave the stories with long names. It doesn't only irritates but makes the reader skip the story as well. However, the title perfectly matches the story and its theme. It is also unique and despite being long it was able to catch my attention. 

1st Impression: ⅖
It was neutral. As it counts from the title, cover and blurb which are the most important factors in catching attention and putting an impression. Reading the first chapter I found many grammatical errors which would be discussed below. 

Reader's interaction: 5/5
It is really good and all the readers are interacting with characters and getting into the story line. Well done. 

Plot: 13/15
Plot is nice. I haven't seen any event or a scene to which I should have an objection. The execution is bad even though the scenes are  not detailed enough and the description of events is less but you managed it beautifully and I enjoyed it a lot. The marks I cut are for the flow and grammatical errors. Flow is something which affects the story line and the continuous reading of a person. 

The flow of events and the story either makes the person read it till the last page or leave it in the middle. Your flow is not bad but you have kept the paragraphs and dialogue different. What I meant to say is, whatever or whenever a dialogue comes, you start a new paragraph, which breaks the flow of the previous paragraph. Your paragraphs are short as well and also long at some points. 

Keep it balanced and you're gonna rock! 

Twist: 7/10
I don't see much twist in the story line. Just a minor one, which comes often in the story Line. However, what made me a little shocked was the magic which was used here. I thought that it was mentioned only in the blurb as some magic of love or self motivation but it really had magic in it and how well the girl had managed it all, left good impressions.

Grammar: 5/10
Now comes the part which I wanted to discuss. The storytelling is always in the past as the word "Story" itself means the happenings and events which have occurred in the past. If we use present tense, it changes the genres and feels like we are reading an easy instead of the story. 

You haven't only used the present tense but mixed up all the tenses as well. You are talking in the present tense in one sentence but immediately change the tense to the past in the very next second. It breaks the flow and affects the reading. 

Apart from this, all is good. 

Emotions: 7/10
As I have stated before, the descriptions of scenes and the explanatory details of events are short. They are void of vast explanations which I think is necessary to make us feel the emotions. Either it involves the characters or only the event. The pain in a dialogue can't be felt unless it has a certain explanation of characters behind it. Such as:

"I..I am sorry" Tears brimmed her eyes as she stared down. The guilt was eating her alive as tears of regret made their way out of her eyes. The ragged breath was cut off by a sob which made her choke. 

Now, the above paragraph shows us all the emotions she was feeling. Your dialogues are there but they don't have background details by which I was not able to detect the emotions. You should work on this factor. 

Character's development: 8/10
As far as I have read the story, I have seen the character's development. In the beginning, I could see the girl's character was weak even though she had potential in her. She just needed polish and in the end her character was all polished and ready. Not only her but all the characters were improved. 

Writing style: 7/10
Your style is not bad. All the factors I have mentioned above affect the story and make it either interesting or boring. You should work on the errors I have pointed out and all should be gold.

Overall: 8/10

Total: 69/100

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