After a sleepless night Madison still sat at Happy's couch nervously fiddling with her hands while Happy and Jesse were talking in the kitchen taking care of breakfast. Eating was the last thing on her mind at the moment but she wouldn't keep the guys from eating something.

Her mind was racing and no matter what she tried to stop it, it didn't work. She still felt like a horrible person. Maybe what she did wasn't a shocker for other people, it was self-defense, right? But she saw it differently. Steven could still be alive today if she hadn't killed him. This was something she always had to live with. And guilt wasn't a great feeling.

What bothered her the most was that she dragged a lot of people into this now. Happy, Jesse, Gemma, Jax maybe even Tara and Izzy. Who knows who that witness was, but that person definitely had a problem with her or why else would they go to the cops two years after the incident? Why not tell the police right away?

All of this didn't make sense to her and the urge to get up and run away was big, leaving all of this behind. At least no one else would get in trouble then. That was exactly what she had feared once her secret wasn't a secret anymore⸺ that other people would get hurt because of her.

Was it too much to ask for a quiet, normal life? Just now that she had finally found her place and was happy, her past caught up with her and caused problems. But it was her own fault. After doing something like this, she had to live with the consequences. But was she really able to push everyone away to make their life easier?

It would be difficult for her to do so, simply because everyone tried to help her as best they could and made her feel like she belonged  here. They all had welcomed her with open arms. But the hardest part would be staying away from Happy⸺ especially after he opened up to her yesterday.

She still found it hard to believe that Happy was a murderer who had a thing for hurting people, even enjoying it. He was nice and helpful to her and to the people in the club. She could always count on him. And while his story should shock her, it didn't. Just the fact that he let her in, let her know who he was, showed that he trusted her⸺ she couldn't just run away now.

But he, and everyone else, would be better off without her. Annoyed by her own chaos of thoughts, she growled softly and rubbed her face with both hands. The tiredness got the best of her, but sleep was out of the question, she had to find a solution.

“You have to eat.” Happy put a plate on the coffee table for her and sat down next to her with his own plate.

“And after that you should get some sleep, you look like shit, dimples.” Jesse walked into the room too and sat next to Madison, putting a fork of scrambled eggs in his mouth.

“I'm not hungry and I don't want to sleep either”, she murmured with a sigh and took a cigarette from the pack that was next to her plate.

“No, you had enough.” Happy grunted, leaning forward to take cigarette from her, catching a confused look from her. “You almost smoked a whole pack last night. Jax is gonna bring your heart meds over by the way.”

“Now you guys decide for me how much I can smoke or what?”, she huffed. The brunette just needed the nicotine to calm her nervousness and anxiety, to keep her head quiet.

“You up for a fucking heart attack?”, the SAA asked with a grunt and gave her a stern look after he put his plate down. He was just worried that too much nicotine might be dangerous for her.

“He's right, Mads. It doesn't help anyone if you end up in the hospital now.” Jesse also put his half-full plate down and looked at the brunette intently. “We just want to help you.”

“For bringing chaos into your life and causing you problems? 'Cause that's all I am, a problem”, she said with a snort, leaning back against the couch. “You don't deserve getting dragged into this mess.”

Jesse ruffled his hair after hearing  her say those certain words. The phrase sounded all too familiar and it was no wonder Madison thought so of herself, after all Adam and Diane did a great job of convincing their kids of that⸺ that they were a problem. It was probably their favorite sentence during Jesse's and Madison's teenage years.

“Stop that shit, woman”, Happy warned. He didn't even want to hear shit like that.

Madison wasn't a problem and she certainly wasn't bringing chaos into his life. On the contrary⸺ she finally provided some balance and calm in his life. “You're not a fucking problem. The person who snitched is the problem for getting you into this fucked up situation.”

Madison swallowed softly, her hard features softened as she looked back and forth between the two men and her guilty conscience gnawed at her again.

“I'm sorry”, she mumbled, biting her nails as she did so. “I'm just scared and when I'm scared I get nervous and angry, I didn't mean to talk to you guys like this.”

“We know you're scared”, Jesse assured her with a faint smile and placed a hand on hers, bringing it away from her mouth to make her stop biting her nails. “I might have a solution.”

“Oh yeah?” In surprise the brunette looked at her brother and so did Happy, both waiting for Jesse to continue.

“Well, all you need is a believable alibi. I could give you one, you know I would but will they believe a stoner that happens to be also your brother? So I came up with someone who's more, well, authentic”, Jesse told them and rubbed the back of his neck. “I thought about Mr. White. I already talked to him. He would come down and give you an alibi.”

“Who's Mr. White?”, Happy inquired with a frown.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Jesse?” Madison couldn't believe what her brother was suggesting. It was sweet that he actually thought about a solution but how on earth did he came up with Walter White? “How did you get him to do this for me? That guy can't even stand us.”

“He owes me a favor. I can't tell you more at the moment but I can tell you that he's..changed a little. Well, he changed his opinion about me”, Jesse nervously cleared his throat.

“Anyone wants to answer my question?”, Happy asked with a growl.

“Sorry”, the brunette said with an apologetic look and scratched her forehead. “Walter White is our old Highschool chemistry teacher. Jesse and I were never his favorite because we simply weren't the picture perfect students he always wished us to be.”

The SAA nodded curtly before he looked at the younger man in the room again, his look almost scolding. “And how sure are you that he won't get her in even more trouble? Because if that happens it's on you.”

“Like I said, he owes me a favor”, Jesse stated firmly with his hands up in the air. “I swear, man, I wouldn't let him do this if it would get Mads in more trouble.”

With a heavy feeling in her stomach, she wrinkled her nose and let out a sigh. “I'm not sure if that's a good idea, Jesse.”

“I think it's your only real chance to get out of this mess and you know that”, Jesse sighed.

As much as Happy hated to admit, Jesse was probably right. A chemistry teacher was more believable than a stoner or a criminal and if that Mr. White was Madison's chance to get out of this mess he wanted her to take that risk.

“Let him do it, little girl. If he can get you out of this it's worth it”, Happy told her, gently placing a hand on her thigh. The feeling of her soft skin on his palm drove him crazy and his mind drifted off for a brief moment before he shook those other thoughts off and tried to concentrate on their current situation.

“You don't know that man, Happy”, the brunette retorted with a bitter laugh. “He doesn't do anything for free.”

“Look, he's sick, doesn't have much time left. He won't want anything in return, Mads”, Jesse reasoned, hoping that his sister would take this chance. “I don't want you to end up in prison, not for defending yourself.”

Happy made her look at him by squeezing her thigh. “Before he can get you in trouble he has to face me first. I won't let you go to jail for killing that fucker but none of us can get you out of this. If that man can, let him help you.”

“Yo, thanks man”, Jesse muttered as relief washed over him when his sister's features softened, which was a good sign.

“Well, it can't get worse, right?” Sighing, she ran her fingers through her dark hair and shook her head. “This is one stupid shit show. But if that's my only chance we should give it a try.”

“Means I can call him and tell him to come down?”, Jesse asked with a glimmer of hope in his piercing blue eyes.

“Yeah, call him, give him my address”, Happy rasped, deciding it was better to answer for her before Madison could change her mind again.

⸺

“You don't have to work, baby”, Gemma told her daughter who sat behind the desk looking through some papers.

The matriarch couldn't find any sleep last night and her fingers were itching to grab her phone and give Madison or Happy a call and ask if everything was fine, but she didn't. She wanted to give the young woman some space but she was dying to find out what really happened.

“It's okay, I'm grateful for any kind of distraction”, Madison smiled softly and wrote something down before putting the papers into a binder that she put aside before looking at Gemma. “I'm fine, please don't worry about me.”

“Can you tell me how I'm supposed to stay calm, Madison?” With her hands on her hips, she let out a huff and eyed the brunette. “I know I have no right to intervene, not after not reaching out to you for twenty five years, but I want to know what's going on.”

Instead of taking offense and getting angry that Gemma was making claims, she sat back with a sigh and looked at the older woman in understanding. If it were her child, she would probably be just as concerned. So Madison also told Gemma about the incident that happened a few years ago that she was arrested for last night.

After the news, Gemma had to sit down and collect herself. That her daughter had killed someone wasn't the problem. The problem was Gemma's guilty conscience. She should have been there for Madison during this time, instead she was all on her own. Jesse seemed to be the only one she had.

“I'm sorry”, Gemma muttered defeated, toying with the ring on her finger. “I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you during this time, that I didn't fight for you harder. I should've brought you home much sooner, then you would've never gotten into this situation in the first place.”

“It's not your fault.” Madison looked sympathetically at the woman she wished she would've had as mother when she was still a child. “Something like that could've happened here in Charming too, anywhere in the world.”

“Nevertheless”, Gemma sighed, rubbing her palms against her jeans, a skeptical look on her face. “And this Mr. White is supposed to give you an alibi now? Can we trust him?”

“To be honest, I don't know”, Madison said, shrugging and lifting a corner of her mouth. “But he's probably my only chance and Happy said he'd keep an eye on it. And I trust Jesse. If he's saying that Mr. White is doing this without any ulterior motive, then it's probably true.”

“So Happy's keeping an eye on it, huh?”,  Gemma remarked, the skeptical look fading as a grin appeared on her face. “What is it between you and Happy exactly? He's never taken a woman home with him, let alone letting sleep one at his house.”

“Oh, you're in love”, the matriarch added with an even wider grin as Madison's cheeks flushed red. “Does he already know about your feelings?”

Madison shrugged slightly. “I don't know what it is between us but I like him, yes. Yesterday, uh, we kissed. But then the cops showed up and arrested me. And once we were at his house we didn't talk about it anymore.”

“I'm telling you, he feels something for you. Don't let him slip through your fingers, baby. Happy may seem rude and grumpy, and sometimes he is”, Gemma began, standing up as she paused to take a few steps towards Madison and then sat down on the desk. “But Happy is the most loyal person I know. If he cares about you, he'll do anything for you.”

“He told me everything about himself”, the brunette admitted with an almost proud smile. Gemma's words only encouraged her not to leave Charming and to give up a possible future with Happy. “That means he trusts me, right?”

“He really told you everything?” Gemma raised an eyebrow in surprise and Madison nodded. Now the matriarch only hoped that Madison could live with the violence.

“Yeah, I think so. It was a shocker at first but..it didn't change anything about how I feel about him”, she said honestly. “I know this lifestyle isn't only rosy and carefree but I think I could handle it.”

“That's my baby”, Gemma hummed with a smile, patting Madison's cheek. “Get that Mr. White to give you an alibi and get you out of this mess. After that, you should have a real talk with Happy.”

Should she really? Have a serious conversation about her feelings with Happy? Biting her nails thoughtfully, she looked out the office window as a group of bikes parked row after row. Her gaze wandered to Happy after he got off his bike, whose eyes first swept to the office to see if Madison was still there. He gave her a quick wink and she gave him a warm smile in return.

Despite all the bad things that happened the last few years, she just wanted to feel good again. And she had a feeling that Happy was the one who could make her feel good.