Who they would be.

John: *would be Zeus, the king of the gods, and would enjoy zapping people randomly with lightning bolts a little too much.*

Paul: *would be Apollo, the god of archery and music, and would be annoying John with his constant lyre playing.*

George: *would be Poseidon, the god of the sea, and would spend most of his time wrecking the ships of modern music bands.*

Ringo: *would be Hermes, the god of thieves, and would constantly be stealing Paul's beloved godly hairbrush.*

What they would say.

John: Zap! Hahahahahahahaha!!!! He never expected that coming! And . . . zap! Hahahahahahahaha!!! You deserved that, mailman! You gave me junk mail for the past week! And, Paul, will you stop playing that stupid ukulele?!? It's driving me mad!

Paul: It's not a ukulele, John. It's a lyre and it was gifted to me by Ringo. Such a nice lad.

John: *scowls.* So it's Ringo's fault you're pestering me, huh? Well, guess who's next on the zap list!!!

George: *snaps fingers and says flatly.* Oops. I didn't mean to do that. That was a complete accident. Justin Bieber's ship just sank. Too bad, so sad. *yawns.* Oh, my. I think all modern music's artists just sank. That was a terrible accident.

Ringo: *dodging bolts of lightning while clutching onto Paul's hairbrush.* Why is John so mad at me?!? It should be Paul! I didn't steal John's hairbrush!