VIOLET'S POV

July 13th, 1959. 11:19 am. Some random train.

Buddy grabs my hand and squeezes it lightly. "You okay?"

I shake my head. "No, no I'm not."

"Doll, it's gonna be okay."

"What if my parents don't even like me? What if they hate me? What if they hate you? What if-"

"Violet, listen to me. It doesn't matter what your parents think. It doesn't matter if they like you or hate you or are indifferent. It doesn't matter if they don't like me. No matter what, we can go back to our lives."

"I don't feel like I can be normal again. I'm Polish."

"Ain't nothin' wrong with Poland."

"But...I liked being French. That was such a huge part of me!"

"You still are French. You were raised in France. You speak French. You like France. I don't see why you can't still be French."

"I wasn't born there!"

"So what? You can be French without being born in France. You grew up in the French mindset."

"I don't like being Polish."

"Then don't think about it. Think about bein' French."

"But-"

"Remember in high school when they tried to make you take that French class and you just refused to speak English to them?"

I giggle. "Yeah..."

"And that you refused to take a simple French class, so you started a mini strike on them?"

I nod.

"And you stopped going to Beginners French and just started going t'that other one?"

"French Literature."

"Then they finally cracked and let you take French Literature?"

"Yeah?"

"All because you didn't wanna waste time on learning simple vocabulary when you coulda been readin' and writin' french and learnin' 'bout their history?"

"Yeah."

"That proves that you're French in my book."

"Why?"

"Because you went t'such extremes in order t'learn about the culture and writin's of France." Buddy smiles. "If you didn't care 'bout your upbringin', you woulda stuck with Beginners. Taken that easy A."

"I guess you're right."

"And the time you lectured a teacher because they said the French were pansies?"

"I-"

"You absolutely destroyed him. He never spoke ill 'bout another country again."

"He was the one being a dumbass! France has won the more wars than any other country in history! We don't surrender! The Nazis only got half of France because we weren't about to sit back and watch our country destroyed! We fought for it and we won!"

Buddy raises an eyebrow. "My point has been proven."

I lean back into my seat. "France is better than Poland."

"And you're allowed to think that. Poland's never been significant t'you."

"I will never, ever, ever be Julia. I am Violet."

"Yes you are."

"Julia Holley." I scoff. "Doesn't even sound right."

"Good thing you're Violet, then."

"Wait!" I freeze. "What if my parents have other kids?"

"What'd you think?"

"I just...I don't want more siblings. I have a brother and a sister and that's enough for me."

"You don't gotta claim them as anythin'. You don't gotta claim Ania and Antoni as your parents."

"I feel so weird."

"Hey, doll, don't worry. It'll all work out in the end."

I purse my lips.

"I love you. Even if you were born in Poland. Even if your parents were spies. Even if your name was Julia." Buddy places a hand on my thigh. "You're the best wife I coulda asked for."

I put my head on his shoulder. "Only another hour until I meet them."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

12:30pm. The Nowak household

"Yep, this is the right address." Koch says, looking at his notebook.

My breath hitches as he knocks.

The door slowly creeps open. I see a teenage girl standing there. I can't help but notice that she looks shockingly similar to Juliet and I.

"Uncle Wilhelm! Ugh, I missed you so much!" She hugs Koch tightly.

I look to Buddy. He seems to have caught on. That's my sister.

"Mina! I've missed you aswell!"

They break the hug. "Who are they?" Mina asks.

"Um. Well, you see, they're your...well, brother and sisters. "

"Excuse me?"

"They're your siblings, Mina."

"No way! I've always wanted sisters!" Mina smiles widely and hugs Juliet and I. "I have sisters!"

Juliet and I glance at eachother.

"Um, hey..." Juliet says awkwardly.

"I can't believe it! I wish you came sooner! You could have given me advice about boys and make up and-"

"Mina, please, let's discuss this inside." Koch inturrupts.

Mina steps to the side and we slowly trickle into the modest house. It's very casual, but nice. Very clean.

She leads us to a living room and we all sit down. Buddy and I on a love seat, Juliet, Koch, and Vincent on the couch. Mina on a chair.

"Doll, is she your sister?" Buddy asks.

Mina nods. "My sisters! I knew I looked like you guys! I've seen you in the magazines!"

"You speak English!?" I exclaim.

"Duh, I'm from England. I just speak German with uncle Koch and my dad."

"You're not even skeptical of us?"

"Hmmm...nope! I knew I looked like you and that my brother looks like him." Mina points to Vincent. "My brother's name is Mike."

"Where's he?" Vincent asks.

"He's with mom and dad at the store. They'll be back here soon."

"Okay..."

"My brother-in-law is Buddy Holly!"

Buddy nods. "Seems so."

"I sorta like rock 'n' roll. My friends Paul and John are huge fans. They'd never believe that you're here."

"Well, we are."

"It's so cool!"

"Mina, aren't you curious on how we're related?" Juliet asks.

"I guess?"

"Well, Ania and Antoni were supposedly spies back in the war. They got pregnant with us three, then left us in Paris as orphans." Juliet rolls her eyes. "Don't know how much I believe the spy story."

"They wouldn't..."

"They did." I reply.

"Oh..."

"They thought Paris would be safer. It wasn't." Vincent adds. "It really wasn't."

"I can tell that you're French." Mina says to Vincent. "I thought this one-" she points to me "Was English."

"My name is Violet." I say.

"Violet, yeah, I knew that. That's my middle name." Mina grins "I didn't know if we were on a first name basis."

I purse my lips. Mom and dad were trying to replace us.

"Oh, I'm Juliet by the way."

"First name Velvet?"

Juliet nods.

"That's my second middle name!"

"Wow." Juliet scoffs.

"My name is Vincent." Vin nods.

"And that's my brother's middle name."

"Interesting..." Vincent says blankly.

I feel betrayed. Ridiculously so.

"How old are you, Mina?" I question.

"I'm almost seventeen." She states. "You're twenty two."

"Mmmhmmm." Juliet gives a fake smile.

"I can't believe that I finally have big sisters!"

Juliet and I glance at eachother. "Yeah..."

I hear the front door open. My blood runs cold. They're here.

"Mina! We're home! Is Uncle Wilhelm here?" A female voice with a thick Polish accent calls.

"Yes! He's in here with some others!"

They're here oh my god.

Buddy looks to me. "You're gonna be okay, doll."

I grab his hand and tightly squeeze it.

A boy appears from the hall. I assume he's Mike.

We all turn to him. He looks exactly like Vincent when we were younger. He's probably about thirteen.

"Mikey! These are our new siblings! Aren't they cool?!" Mina jumps up and drags Mike in.

"We have siblings?" Mike asks quietly.

"Yes! Look at them!" Mina exclaims. "They look just like us!"

Two older people walk in. Maybe around their mid forties.

The woman has long rose-red hair in victory rolls, accompanied by slightly upturned green eyes. Her figure is small, but curvy. She stands shorter than I. Maybe 5'3 or so. I notice her button nose and glamour lips.

Koch wasn't joking. We really look just like her. The only difference is our eyeshapes.

I look to the man. Tall, around 6'0. Muscular. Almond eyes and angular face. He looks very similar to Koch, just not exact. You can definitely tell they're siblings, but not identical.

The two people look to Juliet, then Vincent, and then me.

"Julia! Jania! Jakub!" The woman screams.

Buddy squeezes my hand and I scoot closer to him.

"Ania, no, hush." The man says. "They aren't ours anymore."

"I gave birth to them, Antoni! Of course they're mine!"

"No! No we gave them up, they're not our children anymore!"

"YES THEY ARE!"

I tense up and look at the ground.

"No we are NOT!" Juliet butts in. "You left us, we aren't yours!"

Ania pauses and looks at Juliet. "Is that anyway to speak to your mother?"

"You aren't our mother." I say. "You left. We were taken in by another couple. You aren't my mother. My mother is Isabella."

"Wait, who?" The man asks.

"Isabella and Frank Winter." Vincent says. "They're in the United States."

Ania and Antoni glance at eachother suspiciously.

"Is Frank tall, black hair, brown eyes? Deep voice? Kinda muscular?"

I slowly nod.

"Is Isabella small? Blonde? Blue eyes?"

I nod again.

"No way!" Ania's jaw drops. "They didn't!"

"Excuse me! How do you know them?!" Juliet asks.

"Those sneaks were our colleagues!"

"WHAT?!"

"They were!" Ania spits. "They took you just to spite us! I don't even think Frank and Isabella are their real names!"

She can't be serious.

"I don't care! I just care that they're my parents and you aren't!"

"I am your MOTHER!"

"NO YOU AREN'T! MY MOTHER IS IN LUBBOCK RIGHT NOW WITH MY CHILDREN!" Juliet snaps.

"NO, SHE'S RIGHT HERE IN LIVERPOOL!" Ania fumes.

Juliets face turns bright red. "YOU WILL NEVER BE MY MOTHER. YOU GAVE ME UP. YOU LEFT ME!"

Ania's eyes water. "I DIDN'T HAVE A CHOICE, JANIA!"

"MY NAME IS NOT JANIA! MY NAME IS JULIET!"

"YOU ARE JANIA AND WILL ALWAYS BE JANIA!"

"NO I WILL NOT BE!" Juliet stomps. "I AM JULIET!"

I roll my eyes and stand up. "SHUT UP! BOTH OF YOU!"

Everyone goes silent.

"Both of you are being absolutely ridiculous! Juliet is right to a point. I will never see you as my mother, but I will always see you as someone who cared about me and someone who wanted best for me." I take a deep breath. "I will never have any idea how hard it would be to make the decision to give my children up... but I will always know the pain of not having parents. I will always know the feeling of being adopted. I understand that you're mad that someone else took us in, but they needed to. They were our heroes. Our dumpy orphanage was horrific. The stuff of nightmares, really. You honestly should be grateful that someone saved us."

"We should be grateful?!" Ania hisses.

I nod. "If they didn't, we could very easily be dead."

Ania crosses her arms. "The war was over by the time they came for you!"

"And? After the war was almost worse! And after Koch left- Jesus, you really have no idea how bad it was. Without the Nazi barracks that we could steal food and firewood from, we starved and froze even more! The French government couldn't help us because they had no money to waste on an orphanage."

"You're exaggerating!"

Koch gets up and shakes his head. "No, Ania, it was that bad. Maybe even worse."

"Excuse me, Koch, why do you understand English now but couldn't two hours ago?" Vincent asks.

"I wasn't completely honest about my abilities..."

"Jesus Christ, now you're lying to us!?" Vincent rubs his temples.

"If I'm honest, I didn't trust Buddy until now. I didn't know if I wanted him to hear everything. Now I do see that he's very protective and I think you made a good choice in spouse."

"You're joking!" I feel my hands start to shake. He faked not knowing a language because he didn't trust Buddy? I'm quickly losing respect for Koch.

Then it hits me. Koch was always my protector, of course he'd want someone to protect me after he was gone.

Only it took seven years for Koch's borderline replacement to come in.

I blink hard and sigh. "Is there anyone in my life who isn't lying to me?" I mumble.

"Back to the fact that I'm your mother!" Ania butts in.

"Ania, no. I thank you for birthing me, and thank you for thinking of me, but really, Isabella acted as my mother. We might be partially estranged. We might not have the greatest relationship. We might not get along, but she took me school shopping and she made me dinner. She tucked me in at night and she drove me everywhere. She rubbed my stomach when I was sick and she stayed up with me when I had nightmares. She held my hair back as I vomited and she held my hand on every airplane. She and I might not always see eye to eye, but she did her best to raise me and to make me into a good person."

"Yeah? What about Frank?"

"Same with him. We might not always get along, but he was my father. He threatened boys I brought home and he took me for ice cream. He taught me how to drive and he made me laugh, even as I was sobbing. He made sure I had everything I needed and everything I wanted."

"He threatened boys you brought home?!" Mina exclaims.

I nod. "Well, yeah, that's what dads do. Not seriously, of course. But he would do the whole dad speil."

"Dad speil?"

"If you DARE hurt my daughter, your life will quickly become a living hell, hear me? I may not have guns, but I sure know where to get one!" Vincent imitates my dad.

"Yeah, that." I confirm.

"Even to the Buddy Holly?!"

Buddy laughs. "I wasn't anyone back then. Just a boy who dated a girl."

"But...they gave you a lecture?"

Buddy laughs again. "I got that from just about everyone. Frank, Isabella, Juliet, Vincent, my dad, my brothers, Jerry, the entire percussion section, Mr. Leafe, Adalyn and everyone else." He slowly grasps my hand. "I think I got the message and I think I've lived up to my promise. Ain't gonna hurt her."

"Son, we must have that talk sometime." Koch says.

"Oh, in the English you lied about?" I roll my eyes.

"You wouldn't understand, Violet."

"Obviously not."

"Her name is Julia, Wilhelm."

"My name is Violet."

"Julia."

I shake my head. "My name isn't, and never will be, Julia. Don't call me that. You're the one who named me Violet after a year anyways."

"Too suspicious if three Polish children were in a French orphanage." Antoni says.

"Wait-" Vincent says. "Why is he-" Vin points to Koch. "Still going by his German name?"

Koch purses his lips. "So you all could find me."

Well, I guess that's nice.

"And he likes it better than Jakub." Mike says loudly.

I forgot there were borderline children here.

"Can we please just set this whole mother thing down and get to know each other?" I ask.

Antoni nods. "Please!"

We all sit back down slowly.

"I guess we should introduce ourselves. Hi, I'm Violet, please call me that. Currently, I'm living in New York City with him." I nod to Buddy. "Who's obviously my husband."

"Do you have kids?" Antoni asks.

I shake my head. "No, no not now."

"And what exactly do you do for a living?"

I look at Buddy. "Um, make records, I guess."

"Dad! How do you not know them?!" Minafrowns. "I listen to them all the time!"

"That muck with your 'mods'?"

"Their NAMES are John and Paul, dad."

"Whatever, they're bad news. Anyways," Antoni turns to Juliet. "You?"

"Um, I'm Juliet. Only call me that," She crosses her feet. "I'm also married, but to a man named Russel. We have two kids, Wyatt and Walter. They're twins."

"I'm a grandpa!" Antoni grins. "Yay!"

I admire how calm Antoni has been. I'm glad that he didn't start screaming. Men yelling always, always makes me cry.

"I'm a grandma at forty-eight?" Ania asks.

"Seems so." Koch says.

"I have nephews and I'm twelve!" Mike smiles.

"Yeah, yeah, what about you?" Mina asks Vincent.

Vincent purses his lips. "Uh, I'm Vincent and um I live in California. I got to Stanford University and I'm working on my engineering degree."

"Stanford in California?!" Marta beams. "I've always wanted to go there!"

"Do you have a steady?" Mike asks.

Vincent shrugs. "Sort of. She's madder than hell at me right now."

"Why's that?" Antoni leans forward.

"I didn't tell her about-" he motions to everyone. "This mess."

"I'm Mina!" Mina suddenly says. "I'm sixteen and I like music."

"What kind?" I ask.

"I really love jazz and pop. I like rock and roll, but it's not my favorite."

I nod.

Mike steps up. "I'm Mike, I'm twelve, and I don't know. I like a lot of stuff."

"What's it like being famous?" Mina asks.

Buddy and I look at eachother.

"Uh, just like bein' not famous, I guess." Buddy says. "I ain't noticed a difference,"

"It's like having friends where ever you go. You just don't know you have them." I smile.

"So cool!"

They're both standard teenagers. I can't believe I have younger siblings.

We all fall into a silence.

Why is it always me?