October 3rd, 1954. 6:29 pm, the Winter household

I hear the doorbell ring and I slowly stand up from my spot on the couch and head toward the door.

I peek out and I see Buddy standing there with a large bouquet of flowers and a card in hand.

I frown and slowly open the door. "Hey,"

"Hey, Vincent," He smiles. "Is Vi home?"

I nod and step to the side, motioning him inside. "She's in her room,"

"Thanks!" He steps in.

"What are the flowers for this time?" I question, closing the front door.

Buddy shrugs. "I dunno, just felt like she needed a little 'pick-me-up' today."

"You treat her really well, you know that?"

"I try my hardest, Vin. I really, really do. I can't let her slip through my fingers." Buddy says, walking up the stairs and heading into Vi's room.

I follow him up and act as if I'm going into my room. Buddy and I are about the same height now. Huh. His...ass is right at my eye height...not that I'm looking or anything.

I stop at my door just as Buddy gets to Vi's. Buddy does a special little knock, the door opens, a hand reaches out, and he's pulled inside.

I tiptoe down the hall and carefully put my ear to the door.

"I love you so much!" I hear Vi exclaim.

"I figured you needed somethin' today."

"You're the best boyfriend in the whole world, oh my gosh," I hear her kiss him. I can't tell if its on his cheek, on the lips, on his head, I have no idea.

"I love you more than anythin', doll,"

I hear something being set down. I can only assume it's the flowers and the card.

The bed creaks. I think they sat down.

"I've been really down today," Vi says. "Thank you so much,"

"I know, that's why I brought you all the stuff,"

I guess I've known that Vi's been really sad recently, but I can't say I know why.

"I can't believe I've got you. I've got to be the luckiest girl, I swear. You're the sweetest, most adorable, most caring, most amazing man in this world," Vi gushes. "I'm so in love with you,"

"Doll, I've gotta be the luckiest. You're the best, and you deserve nothing less than the best." Buddy replies. "I'm so in love with you, too."

"Kiss me?" Vi laughs.

"Don't ever gotta ask, doll. I always will," I hear the bed move, I assume Buddy leaned over and is kissing her.

I wish I was my sister.

December 10th, 1953. 8:18 pm, the Winter Household.

I take my glasses off and put them on my nightstand. What kind of man feels this way for another one? I'm broken, I have to be. Men don't like other men. Men like women. Maybe if I try hard enough, then I'll start to like girls. I have to like girls. It's the rules. Men don't like men. Women don't like women. It's been like that since the beginning of time.

My eyes well up with tears and they start to stream down my cold face. I like another man. Another man who's already spoken for... by a girl. Not just any girl, either. My sister.

I start to sniffle and I wipe my cheeks. I'm not okay. I'm broken. No one will ever love me. I'm broken.

A knock at my bedroom door makes me jump. I quickly wipe my eyes and pretend to be reading. "C-come in,"

The door nob turns and Buddy strolls in. "Hey, Vin, what'd the family get Vi for Christmas? I don't wanna get her the same thin- oh my god! Vincent, what's wrong?" He asks worriedly.

I shake my head. "Nothing is wrong. Nothing at all."

"Well, obviously somethin' is! I know Violet pretty damn well and you two act an awful lot alike. I know somethin's wrong." He sits next to me on my bed, wrapping his long skinny arm around my shoulders.

I fight the urge to lean into his chest. "I can't tell you!"

"You can tell me anythin'," he says quietly. I can tell he does this a lot with Violet. Calming her down and making her feel better and whatnot.

"No,"

"Yes you can,"

"Buddy, damn it, I'm crushing hard on this bo-I mean girl. I'm crushing hard on hi-her and there's no chance in hell for him- I mean HER to ever like me back!"

Buddy pats my back. "Sure there is! You're a real catch, any gal would be so lucky to have you!"

My heart skips a beat. Buddy just called me a catch!

"You're good lookin', you're smart, you're athletic, and you're so damn nice. If even I, the biggest nerd in Lubbock High, can get a girl, then you sure as hell can too!"

I shake my head again. "No. No, Buddy you don't understand,"

"Then try to make me understand. Who's the girl?"

"I don't wanna say,"

"Well why's that?"

"Because, Buddy. I really just can't tell you. I'd be in deep shit with everyone in this town,"

He shrugs. "Okay. Okay that's okay. D'you want me t'stay here with you or go away?"

"I'd like to be alone..." I say softly.

He nods and stands up. "You got it, chief. Hey, just know that I'm always here for you. I'm just a phone call or a knock away," he smiles and walks out of my room, closing the door.

I sigh in relief.

How are you supposed to tell your sister's boyfriend that you're in love with him?

The answer is that you don't, especially if you're another man.

I feel more tears start rolling down my face.

September 20th, 1959, 12:11 pm, Stanford College

Linda. I have to find her. Linda Marie Blackburn, Linda.

I'll find her after class.

Linda.

Linda. Linda. Linda.

She's mad at me again. She's always mad. She's pissed. She's pissed because I wasn't listening to her. I was distracted. Buddy was playing on the jukebox in the commons. I miss Buddy. I miss Buddy, he's really great-

Ow! Shit! I just got knocked over onto my ass, my books are everywhere, and my glasses are no longer on my face.

"Oh shit, I'm so so sorry!" I hear a man say. "I didn't see you!"

I squint and look across from me. "Huh?"

"Are these yours? I'm so sorry," he slips my glasses into my hands. "I'm so sorry,"

I put my glasses on and look at him hard. He's skinny, probably tall (I can't tell, we're both still on the ground), he's got brown hair, and soft brown eyes. He looks a bit similar to Buddy, he's even got glasses.

"It's okay, I'm okay, don't worry, I'm fine, I'm not hurt, I'm fine," I ramble. "Don't worry, I'm okay,"

He stands up and offers his hand to help me up.

I bite the inside of my cheek and grab it. He pulls me up.

He's around my height. Six foot one or so.

"So, what class are you going to?" He asks.

"Oh, Art History. It's a dumb required elective,"

"Hey, that's where I'm heading. Do you got it with Professor Allen?"

"Yeah, over in the Randy Rall Building,"

"Me too! Well, do you wanna walk together?"

I nod sheepishly and push up my glasses. "Yeah, yeah, okay, that's okay,"

"Neat! Well, I'm Desmond Winters, call me Desi, and I'm a Human Biology Major. What about you?" He asks as we start walking.

"I'm Vincent Winter, and I'm in engineering,"

"Damn, that's similar! Just dropped the S!"

"Or you added an S," I respond dryly.

He looks at me and smiles. He looks like he could be a movie star. "Maybe, and maybe not. Depends. Who was born first? Me or you?"

"I was born on November 27th of '36," I state

"Aha! I'm older, but not by much. June 10th of '36,"

I frown. "Well then, I guess I just dropped the S,"

Desi and I come up to the Randy Rall building and quietly head inside.

We take seats next to each other in the very large lecture hall. It seats atleast five hundred, easily.

"Why haven't I ever seen you before?" Desi asks as we sit down. "Your name sounds so damn familiar, but I don't think I recognize your face,"

I shrug. I know the reason he recognizes my name is because of Violet. She's mentioned Juliet and I by name publicly more than once, and she's also been publicly mentioned as 'Violet Winter' rather than Violet Holly. I think this was because she mentioned her maiden name in an interview, too. Plus she was in the public eye before her and Buddy tied the knot.

"Winter...I remember that name from somewhere. I remember because I thought of my last name..."

I shrug again. I don't usually like telling people I'm related to Violet Holly. It makes me seem like I would just want attention, and that's the exact opposite of what I want.

"V-something Winter, I've heard it! Are you related to any celebrities? Maybe I've heard it in the press. I tend to keep up with all that,"

"Maybe," I say, pulling out my notebook and a pen.

He narrows his eyes. "Who?"

"I don't know,"

"Winter...Winter...Winter...Music! It's someone in music!"

I feel my heart speed up. "Uh-huh,"

"Probably someone involved in rock 'n' roll, that's the bees knees nowadays." He puckers his lips out.

I glance at his lips and back up to his eyes. Why do they look so soft?

"Is it like your sister or brother or your cousin or something?"

I slowly nod. "Yes, one of those..."

"Hmmm, I swear I've heard it, but not recently."

"Maybe because it's her maiden name-" I accidentally blurt. I feel my cheeks going red. "I mean-"

A look of sudden realization washes across his handsome face. "Violet! Violet Winter! I remember! She's Violet Holly now!"

"Bingo," I say quietly.

He smiles. "I knew I heard it. Gotta say, I like those two. They seem really nice. Violet's been in all the fashion articles recently!

"She has...and yeah, they really are nice...especially Buddy. He's the most genuine guy out there," Damn it, why can't I have a conversation without hyping up Buddy!?

"Y'know, I think I've heard that. I've heard that he's a nice guy. He's a handsome one, too. I'm not surprised the press has been all over him lately. Same with your sister, she's gorgeous!"

I almost choke on my own spit. I'm used to men saying that Vi's pretty. She is, I know. But another man saying Buddy's good-looking? I thought I was the only one who thought so.

"Man, I'm sure you get questions about them a lot," Desi says. "I won't ask,"

I shake my head. "Actually, not really. Not too many people know. I usually don't tell anyone."

"You don't? Why? It's such a neat thing,"

"Because I don't want to seem like I just want their fame,"

Desi nods understandingly. "Yeah...I sorta wanna be famous, actually..."

"A lot of people do."

"I have an audition for a new movie coming up. It's starring Marilyn Monroe and some other male lead. I'm auditioning for the male lead,"

"That's neat! When is it?"

"Next Tuesday at 5pm,"

"Well, Desi, I hope you get the part." I say to him as the professor walks up to his podium in order to begin class.

September 27th, 1959. 12:23 pm, Stanford University

Seeing Desi has easily become the highlight of my days of this class. He's funny and he's smart and he's so charismatic, I don't know what happened.

He's so great, I think he might already be my best friend.

I take my usual seat and notice Desi isn't here yet. Maybe he'll show up, he's late sometimes.

He better show up. I like looking at him. He's a nice distraction from whatever art bullshit we're learning about. I'm going to be an engineer, why the hell do I need Art History?!

Minutes tick by and Desi still hasn't shown. Maybe he's sick.

He's probably just sick. I should call him after class and see. I want to hear his midwestern accent, it soothes my ears.

1:32 pm

Desi never showed. He's definitely sick. He wouldn't just ditch class. He couldn't, could he? I just want to see him. I want to talk to him. He's so beautiful...

I practically run out of the building and into the nearest phone booth, dialing his number quickly.

After a couple of rings, he answers.

"Hello?" I hear him say.

I try to stifle my blush. Even just heating him makes me so flustered. "Hey, its Vin,"

"Vincent! I was planning on calling you, we got some good news!"

I hope its anything besides he got a girlfriend. Any news besides that is good news. "Yeah? What is it?"

"I got the role! I got the role of Mr. Thomas Brooks in the movie I auditioned for! I can't believe I got it!"

I smile widely, no doubt looking like a serial killer. "Woah!"

"Yeah! I got the role! Table read is next month!"

"That's so neat! You're gonna be a movie star!"

"But there's always good in the bad, Vincent." Desi says, suddenly seriously.

"Oh gosh, just lay it on me, I guess."

"I'm dropping out. I have to focus on the movie. If this one goes well, I'll get more auditions for others!"

I feel my heart stop beating. Desi dropping out?! Who am I supposed to stare at in class? There's no other cute boys in that class!

"I'm so sorry, Vincent. I hate to leave you alone in that godawful art history all by yourself,"

"No...it's fine. This is a really big deal," I feel myself start to tear up. "It's good for you. I'll survive this hell of a class, I promise,"

"Hey, Vincent, I'll make sure to call you whenever I can, okay? I gotta go now, but I'll make sure to keep in touch!"

"Yeah...I'll talk to you later, Desi...bye." I say, quickly hanging up the phone and wiping my eyes.

Everytime I start to like someone, they scamper off and leave me. I guess I should be used to it.

I have Linda and all, but she's more of my best friend rather than a girlfriend...

I can't wait for Desi's movie to hit screens.